Don't Fake It
by MissGoalie75
Summary: Five days until spring break, nine days of vacation, and another six days until it all comes down. During this time, Kenshin will find ways to fix his current life of continually faking it…and help his ex-girlfriend do the same…
1. Countdown to Vacation: 5

Summary: Five days until spring break, nine days of vacation, and another six days until it all comes down. During this time, Kenshin will find ways to fix his current life of continually faking it…and help his ex-girlfriend do the same…

A/N: Here goes – my third KK story! I've finally gotten around to writing an _actual_ high school story! Converse wasn't in school…and Almandine wasn't a normal school…so this is huge!

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Countdown to Vacation: 5 

He was often noted as the carefree poet with a guitar in hand. The observation was true, that he couldn't deny. At first glance, his thoughtful yet playful violet eyes, ripped jeans, and old guitar fit the standards for a deep, mysterious musician. He was okay with it.

Nobody had to know anything else.

But many had vague ideas. Especially those who had been to school with him long enough. Most knew that this was to be the _worst_ week of the school year for him. Besides the fact that it was the last painful week before spring break, it also held a very sad anniversary.

Two, he would correct some.

The first, which was rather ridiculous to many, was to come the next day. The second, and the most understandable, was to come in three days.

He absolutely _hated_ this week.

But there were things to look forward to. This year was it – he could feel it in his gut and he was sure it wasn't the remnants of the stomach flu he had over the weekend. The band he sang lead and played guitar for, The First Absolute, was going to win Battle of the Bands at the Akabeko next week.

The band had been polishing their old songs, and he had been coming up with new songs that he knew could blow anybody's mind after one listen. Yes, he was confident about next week.

He felt a ghost of a pang in his chest – it was too old and familiar for him to wonder why. It was another lost event he could've shared with her.

But there was still some hope – things could possibly change within the next week or so…

He looked down the line of parked cars and spotted a lovely raven-haired girl just getting out of her car. And not just any car – it was a powder blue Volt's Wagon Beetle – the dream car she had always wanted. Putting his hands deeper into the pockets of his tan jacket, he made his way over to her.

"I'm glad one of us got what they wanted for their birthday this year. Sadly, I didn't get my early birthday wish of having my grandma get run over by a reindeer." He said, leaning against the new car, slightly scowling. His birthday was earlier in the year – January eighth. He usually got birthday gifts during the holiday season, which justified his comment. He also harbored an unbearable hatred toward his grandmother – his mother's mother.

She looked over to him, rolling her blue eyes in the process. "Of course she didn't, she would've beaten the shit out of it before it did such a thing." She gave him a small smile.

He chuckled a little. "True. So how eventful was your birthday?"

She shrugged before locking her car and walking toward the school. "It was typical. Some family visited for the weekend, grandma Yuki baked a cake…you know…all that stuff."

Sadly, he did know. He was once involved in "all that stuff." "How's your other grandma?" He asked concernedly, twisting a sterling silver ring around his finger.

She clearly noticed his nervousness and the ring he was twisting. She had given it to him a few years ago when she came back from summer camp – when everything changed. Her teeth covered her bottom lip for a few seconds. "Okay. She insists on getting out. Apparently before I visited she tried to 'flee the premises' as they worded it."

He threw his head back and laughed. "No way! Granny is the shit. Honestly, you have the coolest grandma. Give her my regards, would you?"

"I will." She grinned at him, and he felt as if he lifted off the ground a few inches. Making her smile like that made his day complete.

He noticed that she wasn't wearing her silver heart necklace that she normally wore everyday. Instead, a small gold flower was hanging from her neck.

"A gift from Enishi?" He asked casually, nodding at the necklace.

She unconsciously put her hand over it. "Yeah, it was really very nice of him. It's beautiful." She answered as if she had said it many times in her head.

He didn't bother to point out that Enishi was a complete moron for getting her a necklace. Anyone who knew her was aware of the fact that her simple silver heart necklace was obviously of importance to her. However, those who _really_ knew her knew that her late grandfather had given it to her when she was seven, the year he and she had met…

"Alternating will be a pain in this ass." He added with slight smugness.

She gave an exasperating sigh. "Don't go there, Kenshin, just don't."

The smile faded from his face. He cleared his throat. "Right. So…I'll see you in gym." He said, ending the conversation on a quick note. It bothered him to no end that she couldn't tolerate any resentment toward Enishi. He had a right to hate him. After all, he was the one whom she dated almost directly after breaking up with him.

* * *

When he walked past her, she allowed herself to finally graze her teeth over her bottom lip. She constantly forgot how woefully beautiful he truly was these days. His gem eyes held a stark keenness, making her feel like an open book. Then again, since they knew each other for so long, she assumed it was natural to feel that way, they were too close for too long. 

She sighed loudly. How did he continue to stay exactly the same all these years? His fluid lifestyle and adaptable way were beyond her comprehension – after all that had happened to him…

But she supposed that was why he was this way – it was only natural since he found out at such a young age how life is fleeting and can be taken away in an instant.

She internally shuddered at the thought. It almost made her want to scream and yell at everyone who had such petty worries in this school. Who cared if the theme for junior prom should be Nautical or classic? Who cared if two people in the school had the same shirt as you?

Almost.

She had been down this train of thought plenty of times since ending things with him. But she knew deep in her heart that she wouldn't give up all her hard work just for a fleeting moment of relief. Despite her deep beliefs against those who are so shallow and fake, she knew that was what she partially was. She couldn't help it – what she did involved being a bit fake.

God, she hated Mondays. It almost made her forget why she broke up with him sometimes.

Someone tapped her shoulder, to which Kaoru slowly grasped to be Megumi's doing. She smiled at her friend. "Hey, what's up?"

"Ugh, _dying_ for vacation." Megumi groaned, closing her eyes, as if she was trying to pretend that she was on a beach instead of being in school. "But besides that, just a ton of homework – I was _so_ busy this weekend."

"Yeah, me too! These A.P. classes are out of control – they're really cracking down because of these stupid tests." Kaoru agreed, rolling her eyes.

Megumi sighed, looping her arm with Kaoru's. "Just wait, next year when we're seniors at this point in the year, we won't have anything to worry about."

"Well, _hopefully_ I'll just have to worry about student government." Kaoru reminded Megumi, a small smile on her face.

"Oh, please. You're going to get that presidency. Tomoe totally has you under her wing – it's so obvious she wants you." Megumi said with a dismissive gesture. "Also, with Mr. Enishi Yukishiro as your totally hot boyfriend, you've got it in the bag."

Kaoru beamed, thinking of Enishi. "Yeah, I didn't talk to him all weekend – his cousins from Colorado were visiting. I miss him."

"Then how did you get _this?_" Megumi squealed, pointing to the gold necklace around her neck.

"He managed to drop it off at my house at an ungodly hour, which was very nice."

Megumi shook her head. "He should've called, that naughty boy."

Kaoru had to agree, he should've called to wish her a happy birthday. But she knew that he did manage to give her a cute card with Snoopy on it with the necklace, so she let it slide, despite feeling slightly disappointed.

Kaoru shrugged. "I understand he's been busy…it probably slipped his mind until late last night when everyone left."

A very unpleasant thought came to her mind at that point: Kenshin _always_ managed to call her on her birthday.

She tried to brush it away, even though it was a very valid point. When the two of them were best friends and when they were going out, he always found a creative way to wish her a happy birthday, even if he wasn't always there to do it.

"Well, you two will just have to kiss and make up." Megumi said with a mischievous glint in her eye.

Kaoru smiled and shook her head. She was sure that Enishi would come to her with large puppy dog eyes, apologizing profusely for not calling her. Yes, she was sure of it.

* * *

Kenshin had a million reasons why he hated Pre-Calculus Honors. But there was one, bright reason why he loved it: Enishi was in his class. 

A lot of people would stare at him confusedly for that answer. After all, Enishi was Kaoru's boyfriend, and Kenshin had every right to hate him, and he did take full advantage of it. But, they all forgot that Kenshin had a natural ability that shocked every teacher he got in high school.

And on the fifth day before spring break, he was pleasantly reminded why he enjoyed being in the same room with Enishi Yukishiro for forty-five minutes each class four times a week.

"This class average was _horrible_ on the test you took on Friday." Mr. Saito stated bluntly, dropping the pile of tests on his desk, making a loud noise.

All the girls in the class winced and boys fidgeted uncomfortably. Kenshin, however, let out a breath and leaned back in his chair comfortably. He admitted that the test was a bit harder than usual, but it wasn't enough to worry him.

Not that he would actually worry about a stupid test – there were more important things in life.

He fingered his wide, brown leather bracelet with plaited leather strips that had an adjustable buckle. A good luck bracelet – Kaoru had given it to him for one of his own birthdays. He always did well wearing it.

He looked toward one of his best friends, and band mate, Soujiro Seta, who gave him a slightly worried look. Soujiro played rhythm guitar for The First Absolute, and had any sort of idea of Kenshin went through when he was eleven, given that Soujiro lost both his grandparents to cancer at a young age. But as to their feelings on grandparents – they had no common ground whatsoever.

"What was the class average, Mr. Saito?" An annoying girl chirped, raising her hand high in the air. She was always that girl in class who always asked for the specifics of test results.

"Probably a sixty-five. And that's only because there were a few people that brought up the average."

Kenshin yawned and closed his eyes briefly. He should've just skipped this period – all they would do was go over the test because his class was occupied by too many kids who liked to be spoon fed everything.

But he did respect Saito in a grudgingly sort of way. The two had a very strange relationship – not only was Saito extremely curious about Kenshin's complete lack of concern for the class, yet managed to ace every test, but he had known Kenshin since he was baby.

It so happened that Saito and Kenshin's father were friends in college.

But they weren't very close, so Kenshin hadn't met him until he was about five or six. He remembered that horrifying moment when he first laid eyes on him – he was very similar to the "big, bad wolf" in the story books his mother used to read…

_Shit_, Kenshin thought to himself, _don't think about her now._

"Kenshin – you were the only one to get that problem right – show us what you did on the board." Saito said, interrupting Kenshin's thoughts.

His violet eyes shot up to Saito's face, who stared back expectedly. He sighed and slowly got up from his chair, walking all the way up to the front where Saito held out his test expectantly.

He noted that he got a ninety-seven – he wondered what miscellaneous errors Saito managed to find this time.

He didn't need to ask which problem he needed to do – it was the second to last problem. He knew this because he had a bit of trouble with it in the beginning, not that he would admit that to anyone. He snorted when he found one source to his point deduction – he forgot to write down the answer to a square root could be positive or negative…even though the answer was the positive value.

Robotically he copied what he did, eliciting many "oh's" and "I see's." At the end, he bolded the positive/negative sign by drawing over it a few times, getting a low chuckle from Saito.

When Kenshin finished, he placed the piece of chalk back in Saito's hand and walked back to his desk. He and Enishi made eye contact, and Enishi gave a slight scowl. Kenshin gave him a small smirk in return before sitting down.

"Okay, see what formula he used…" Saito started, point to the board.

And Kenshin officially spaced out once again. School was such a waste of time – he could be doing more important things, such as coming up with new songs for the band. Or rehearsing – they had a performance on _Thursday_…which he was not happy about. But who was he to deny an opportunity for his friends? Although they all told him that he could cancel their gig, knowing what the coming Thursday meant to him, but he couldn't do it.

He would just have to suck it up and deal with it, which he was a master at.

* * *

Kaoru _hated_ gym. It wasn't because of humiliation of coming up to bat and striking out, nor was it the annoyance of changing clothes. 

It was the fact that her boyfriend and ex-boyfriend were in her class as well.

But it wasn't just that, it was also because Enishi didn't act like himself. He was so against Kenshin that it drove him insane…and it annoyed Kaoru to no end. She confronted him about it after the third class in the beginning of the year, and he did improve slightly, but there were still days that made her want to break up with him.

She guessed it was to be expected, given that Kenshin loved to torment Enishi. But she couldn't blame Kenshin for that either.

The situation could not be defined in black and white.

It also didn't help that her gym teacher was as old as some of the books they had to read in English – which meant that students could get away with a lot of things. Also, it meant that she wasn't very sharp – and continued to put Kenshin and Enishi on different teams.

She wasn't quite sure if her gym teacher actually _did_ notice and took a perverse pleasure in watching the two of them battle, or if she truly was clueless and it was just a coincidence.

Somehow she thought it was the former.

Kaoru reached into her backpack and took out her new gym shirt to wear and turned paper white. "Shit!" She whispered, opening up the shirt, hoping it wasn't true.

It was. She managed to take the _one_ shirt she carefully avoided taking ever since she dumped Kenshin over a year ago – it was one of the first t-shirt designs for his band.

She didn't even want to think about Enishi's reaction to the shirt.

But she knew Kenshin would make a smart comment about how that shirt would be worth thousands of dollars when the band would become famous.

"Hey, do you have a shirt that I could wear?" Kaoru asked a freshman girl. She continued asking around for a couple minutes, everyone suspiciously not having an extra shirt. "Fucking freshmen…" She muttered to herself in defeat as she put on the shirt, immediately crossing her arms over it to hide the design, which she had to admit, was very cool.

It had The First Absolute written in blue block letters and there were dainty green vines around the name, contrasting the bold letters. She was the one who designed it.

Misao, an old friend of Kaoru's, looked at her crossed arms with a questioning expression. Kaoru let her arms fall to her sides for a brief second before putting them back up again.

Misao chuckled. "Kenshin will have a field-day and Enishi will flip a shit. This is going to be a _great_ gym class."

Kaoru groaned as they walked up the stairs from the locker room to the gym, where half the class was waiting. Enishi came up to her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"I'm _really_ sorry about not calling you. After seeing my ridiculous cousins off it was already eleven…I'll make it up to you this weekend, okay?" He said with wide, apologetic eyes.

Kaoru gave a small smile. "How can I resist those eyes?" She admitted.

Enishi smiled and kissed her temple before looking at her tightly crossed arms. "What are you doing?" He asked with an amused grin.

She sighed. "Let me just tell you that I was in a rush this morning and I wasn't thinking when I took this shirt."

"Now I'm really curious, what is it?"

She lowered her arms, revealing the band that Enishi despised. He frowned at the shirt, trying to hide his immense disgust. The thought of Kenshin and her together was enough to make him vomit – he didn't understand how such a girl like her managed to fall for such a guy like Kenshin Himura.

"Well, _well_, Miss Kaoru, I never thought I would see that shirt again." Kenshin said with an amused voice, draping his sinewy arms around Kaoru and Enishi's shoulders. "That was always my favorite design – it will be worth quite a lot when the band becomes famous."

Kaoru couldn't help but snort – she figured he would say something along those lines.

"You're so predictable." She muttered, shrugging his arm off her.

Enishi roughly removed Kenshin's arm from his shoulder and glared at him. "It wasn't intentional, so stop pretending that it is."

Kenshin merely shrugged with a light smile on his face. "It couldn't have been _completely_ unintentional…but that didn't need to be said out loud, right?"

"Kenshin." Kaoru said sharply, effectively stopping him from saying anything else.

He shrugged again, giving her a flippant smile. "Then I'll leave you to it." He turned his attention to Enishi. "I'm going to make sure I hit you in the face today." He informed Enishi as if he was simply telling him the weather.

"Don't sing it, just bring it." Enishi said calmly, raising his eyebrows.

"_Then maybe it works when I leave, yeah, you fake what you say you love._" He sung before humming the rest of the song to himself before walking away from the couple.

Kaoru had to take a breath before looking at Enishi. There was something about Kenshin's voice that got to her every time. Despite hearing him sing countless times, his voice always managed to ensnare her. She loved hearing him hum to himself as well – it sounded just as good as when he sung.

But she would never admit that to anyone.

When Mrs. Mimura separated everyone into teams, she couldn't help but analyze the lyric he had sung. Out of the thousands of songs he knew by heart, he managed to select one about her relationship with Enishi, according to him of course. Who was he to judge – she truly loved Enishi – she wasn't faking it.

But he seemed to think so.

"_I'll make your past regret its future_…" Kenshin murmured under his breath, rocking back and forth on his green Converse as they waiting in line to come up to bat.

"Would you stop?" Kaoru muttered.

He chuckled. "You know this song too, right?"

"No."

His smile fell. "What?"

"I don't listen to that stuff anymore, you know that."

He clucked his tongue once. "Well, look them up – All Time Low. Catchy, and good lyrics. They're fun."

"I'm too busy to look up miscellaneous bands." Kaoru said dismissively.

"Oh, right, too busy for that, yet you have more than enough time to organize the junior prom." He rolled his eyes. "Meanwhile, you could be discovering music that could potentially change your life."

It was her turn to roll her eyes. He always exaggerated the importance of music. "Music isn't high on everyone's 'important things' list."

"It used to be on yours." He said softly.

She bit her tongue to prevent herself from saying, "that was only because of you."

Mrs. Mimura shoved the bat under Kaoru's nose, preventing herself from saying anything to Kenshin that she might regret later. After whiffing the first pitch, she managed to hit the ball so it rolled between second and third base.

"_Here's to you._" He whispered, watching her as she ran to first base and laugh when Enishi grabbed her with the ball he was just thrown. His hands began to tremble a little by his sides.

He looked down to his shoes when he thought of a later lyric in the song:

_The flavor of your lips is enough to keep me here. Keep me here…_

* * *

"Happy birthday, Kaoru!" Kaoru heard someone exclaim as she was doing her U.S. Government homework that was due the next day. She looked up and grinned when she recognized who it was. 

"Thanks, Tomoe."

Tomoe quickly grabbed the seat next to Kaoru, running her hands behind her so she could sit smoothly with her jean skirt. She raised her eyebrows at Kaoru before asking, "so, what did you get? I can't believe my protégé is _seventeen!_" She then sighed rather dramatically. "It seems like only yesterday when you came to the first student government meeting at fourteen-years-old."

Kaoru smiled fondly at the memory. "Yeah, I was quite the little frosh."

"Yeah, good thing I got to you in time. Can you imagine what would've happened if I continued to let you wear that jean jacket?"

Kaoru laughed along with Tomoe but looked away from her. That was a Kenshin's old jacket…

"Yeah, well we all go through our awkward phases, yeah?" Kaoru said lightly, closing her textbook. True, it wasn't the most flattering piece of clothing she owned at the time, but it was like an old blanket to her. The best thing about it was that it smelled like him no matter how many times she ran it through the wash.

"True. So, what did you get?" Tomoe asked again. Her eyes immediately started scanning down Kaoru's body from her low ponytail to her pearl studs. Her searching eyes stopped at the gold necklace resting on her chest. She gasped as she reached a hand out to touch it. "Is _this it?_"

Kaoru beamed. "Yeah, wasn't it _so_ sweet of him? You should've seen me when I opened it, I totally flipped."

Tomoe's eyes shined with excitement. "You two are just _the_ _It_ couple. It's so cute. Can you imagine next year, Kaoru? Taking my place as president of the student government and having _the_ Enishi Yukishiro as your boyfriend? It's perfect!"

"He _is_ rather perfect, isn't he?" Kaoru said with a sigh. She couldn't deny that Enishi was quite a catch: he was going to be captain of the three teams he played on which included soccer, ice hockey, and lacrosse, he was very good looking, and he was as sweet as could be. He treated her like a princess.

"And that's _exactly_ why the two of you will be like _royalty_ next year." She made a little squeal of excitement.

Kaoru laughed as she shook her head. "People still have to vote for me, you know."

Tomoe waved a hand dismissively. "Everyone will vote for you. There's no contest. Megumi's going to be V.P., Sakura is going to continue being the treasury, and everyone else is just no contest."

A thrill ran through Kaoru's stomach at the thought of being president. How amazing would it be to have that on your high school transcript? Besides, she really wanted to make a difference, as cheesy as it sounded even to her.

"Well, let's try getting through the rest of this year. I have to get through fourth quarter with killer grades because unlike _some_ people," Kaoru gave a pointed look at Tomoe, "who haven't gotten into college yet."

Tomoe laughed. "Don't worry, in a few months you won't have to worry either." She looked down at her small-faced watch before gasping. "Damn it! I have to finish this Calculus packet before next period! I'll see you tomorrow in Government." She said quickly before swinging her pink Vera Bradley bag over her shoulder and striding out of the cafeteria.

Kaoru sighed as she reopened her textbook. Somehow she didn't feel quite as motivated to finish her homework early.

* * *

After school when everyone was pulling out of their parking spots, Kenshin realized with a certain thrill that he was stuck behind Kaoru in the line of cars. A slow smirk grew on his face. 

He waved to her, knowing she could see him through her rearview mirror. After a few seconds she gave a short wave without turning around. He shook his head, thinking, _that won't do_.

Making faces at her, he stuck his tongue out, and twisted his face into all sorts of expressions. When he saw her shoulders shake he smiled. She turned around and grinned at him while shaking her head. He honked at her when he realized that the line was moving forward.

He mouthed, "come on then!" and moved his hand, signaling her to move forward.

She immediately turned around and moved the car. When she was turning left out of the parking lot, she lowered her window. He quickly did the same and managed to hear her call, "you loser!" with an amused grin.

"One of a kind, dahling." He said with a New York accent.

She shook her head once again and brought her window back up again.

She was still smiling when she drove out of the school, he noted with a triumphant grin of his own.

He had to meet the band at Sano's house, where all the recording equipment was, in a half hour. In the mean time, he would drop off his bag, pick up his electric guitar, and maybe grab a bag of chips.

Pulling into the driveway, he turned off the ignition and ran to the front door. Before unlocking, he heard muffled yells. As quietly as he could he unlocked the door and stepped inside.

"What do you mean you _crashed your car?_ I'm not paying for it, you know." Pause. "God damn it, Sozo, you're twenty-years-old!" Kenshin heard his father curse on the phone.

He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding – for a few moments he thought his brother was actually home at the same time he was.

Running up the stair skipping two at a time, he strode to the end of the hallway where his room was, which was originally to be a den, but when his family first moved in, Sozo and he flipped a coin to see who would get the room for himself.

When Sozo and Kenshin stopped talking to one another, Kenshin was always smug of the fact that he had the bigger room.

His room was his safe haven from the world. The space immediately relaxed his racing mind. His bedroom was rather large with a queen-sized bed covered by a quilt decorated with blocks of plaids in various colors across the room and a large window with a navy cushioned bench underneath. A huge, navy throw rug covered most of the wooden floor along with miscellaneous papers for school and an amp for his electric guitar, which was propped up against the window bench.

Quickly tossing his messenger bag to the side, he walked over to his bed where his acoustic guitar was resting. The guitar was like an old stuffed animal to him, he simply couldn't live without it.

He strummed a few chords as he walked back to the left of his room were his Mac was already turned on. "Don't Be Shy" by Cat Stevens filled the room by his doing. His fingers on the frats moved expertly and with barely any thought as he checked his e-mail, horribly hoping that somehow his band wouldn't have to perform on Thursday night.

Of course, he was sent a confirmation e-mail by the manager, with a little note saying how she was very excited to see them, since she heard such great things about The First Absolute. She even included a smiley face, which made him groan.

"Fuck me…" He whispered as he rolled his eyes, immediately stopping. He stood up slowly and put his acoustic guitar back on his bed, grabbing his royal blue electric guitar by its neck and then placing it inside the soft black case for it.

Before leaving his bedroom, he opened his bag to take out a messy black notebook with some papers sticking out. He flipped through it, watching the transformation from his awkwardly messy writing to his currently smooth, quick script. Turning to the last page he wrote in, he frowned. Nothing came to mind today, which was abnormal.

_Probably during rehearsal something will hit me_, he thought to himself as he closed his notebook and stuffed it in his guitar case.

When gathered his stuff and went downstairs, his father was still yelling at Sozo in the kitchen, so Kenshin decided to skip out on the bag of chips and just eat food from Sano's house.

"Hi dad, bye dad." Kenshin said on his way out the door. He didn't expect an answer as he shut the door and made his way to his car. After all, their relationship was pretty lax, given the fact that his father had missed out on over four years of his son's life.

* * *

Sano lived on the opposite end of Westbrook from Kenshin. Sano's house, although rather small, was full of energy and life and opposed to Kenshin's own rather large, empty one. Kenshin enjoyed coming to the Sagara house because it was completely different from his own. He felt much more comfortable there than anywhere else. 

Although he had to admit, their driveway wasn't the easiest to get in and out of.

Ringing the door bell, he waited patiently, knowing that it would take at least two minutes for someone to stop being lazy and answer the door, a trait that existed in every family member, except for Sano's younger brother Ota.

"_God_, can _anyone_ get off their lazy ass?" He heard Sano's younger sister Uki exclaim before opening the door. "Hi Ken, everyone's down in the hell hole."

Kenshin smiled. "Thanks Uki. Haven't seen you in a while – how're the middle school teachers?"

"You mean Mrs. Tomokazu specifically?" She asked with a knowing smile. "She referred to you the other day."

"Really?" Kenshin asked interestedly as he entered the house and shut the front door behind him.

"Yeah, she was talking about our research papers and how yours was one of the best she's ever read…despite being an absolute slacker."

Kenshin grinned. "Yes, that always pissed her off. Still bitter about it even after three years."

"You should see the way he treats Shuya in my English class. She's totally rides on him about slacking. You started that, and he's so pissed at you even though he's never met you."

Kenshin shrugged with nonchalance. "Can't help with that. At least I have some sort of smarts to make up for it. If he's just a slacker and a moron, then he's just wasting himself." He turned right down the small hallway to the door that led to the basement. "I'll see ya around, kid."

"I'm fourteen, God damn it." She called as she went in the other direction to the staircase that led to the upstairs bedrooms.

He chuckled as he opened the door and shut it before walking down the steep steps to the basement. He could hear his fellow band mates chatting and Sano's loud laugh as he made his way down and entered the room.

Sano was sitting on a high stool across from Yahiko, who was sitting on a lime green beanbag. Soujiro was sprawled on the torn leather loveseat next to Yahiko. They all looked to the entranceway when Kenshin strolled through.

"Hey! It's Kenshin the…shit. Nothing rhymes with your name. I guess you're not cool enough." Sano said as Kenshin propped his guitar against the wall.

"What rhymes with your name then?" Kenshin asked amusedly as he collapsed onto the matching leather couch. "Paesano? Which you aren't because, one, you're not Italian, two, you're not a brother because I'm not even in the room for two minutes and already you've insulted me, and three, Sano is actually your nickname, I just realized, so it doesn't actually count. Wow, I effectively wasted my own breath and everyone else's time."

Soujiro laughed out loud before sitting upright, taking a chip from the nearby bag and eating it.

Sano snickered. "Nice try, buddy."

"Go fuck yourself. It's confirmed – we're playing Thursday." Kenshin said, effectively changing topics. In the corner of his eye he saw Yahiko eating from the bag of potato chips. "Can you _share_ the chips?" He asked Yahiko, who hesitantly passed the bag to him.

"Is that okay with you? We could totally lie and say that you're getting tested for Herpes…totally believable." Sano offered with a smile on his face.

"Fuck you. No, it's fine. I'll be fine. It's probably exactly what I need." Kenshin said before eating a chip. "Mm, I like this flavor. What is it?"

"Salt and vinegar. We were getting tired of the sour cream."

"Correction – _you_ were getting sick of the sour cream, Yahiko." Soujiro noted.

"Fine, I was, but we needed a change anyway. We've been eating sour cream for too long."

"Yeah, but maybe they're a lucky flavor." Sano said.

"What?" Kenshin asked amusedly, taking a handful.

"Like, we've come up with some really good shit while eating them. Maybe we shouldn't switch." Sano explained, traces of worry showing on his brow.

"Are you joking? Sano, chip flavors can't bring _luck_." Kenshin said, shaking his head incredulously as he ate a few more chips.

"Besides, I think we're good enough to not rely on superstitious things like lucky…flavors…" Soujiro said, trailing off with a puzzled expression on his face. "That really doesn't make sense. How in the world did you think of lucky flavored chips?"

Sano shrugged. "I don't know. You know me, random shit pops into my head."

"True." Kenshin said as he swung his legs to the ground and stood up. "Alright, enough about lucky flavors, which, by the way, is definitely going on your senior sweatshirt Sano,"

"Every random thing I say is going to end up on my senior sweatshirt! The end of this year is going to suck because I'm going to have to choose…" Sano exclaimed.

"Anyway," Kenshin said with a smile, "we should get practicing."

"Yeah, my research paper needs to be handed in this Friday." Soujiro added in a worried tone.

"Oh, please, knowing you the paper's already done." Yahiko said dismissively as he went to the drum set.

Soujiro shrugged sheepishly. "I still need to edit!" He grabbed his rhythm guitar from the wall and started tuning.

"Why do you even bother wasting so much time? After all, Yuriko is so easy." Kenshin said dismissively as he unzipped his guitar out and began tuning his as well.

Soujiro stopped what he was doing to stare at the redhead. "Are you _serious?_ She's so hard! I barely get a B in that class!" He exclaimed with wide eyes. Kenshin froze in the middle of twisting the knob on the neck. _Oh, shit_, he groaned internally. "Oh my God, not her too! Are you joking, Kenshin? I thought the only reason you don't share your grades from that class was because you were nearly failing for once!"

Kenshin almost snorted at that comment. He would never fail a class based on grades alone. In fact, if only his tests and papers were just used in grading, he would surpass even the top student of their graduating class.

Soujiro let out an uncharacteristically frustrated sigh. "How unfair…of course the guy who doesn't care about school does well in Yuriko's class."

Kenshin smiled sadly. Out of everyone in the band, Soujiro cared the most about his grades and the clouded future of college. "She just likes my style. She's a bitter old witch…so I tend to write in a style that would most amuse her. It's the only reason why I haven't been thrown out of that class yet." He explained as he finished tuning.

Soujiro laughed. "Yeah, well, you should really try to at least _pretend_ to pay attention."

"Now why would I do that? It's total bullshit. I think the teachers find it rather refreshing that a student isn't trying to fake his interest or whatever. I'll pay attention when I find whatever we're learning interesting…which is rare."

"Actually, teachers just get pissed." Yahiko said as he started drumming a beat.

"Not with Kenshin, especially the female ones." Sano said while wiggling his eyebrows. "He's just _so_ charming!" He added in a high voice, resembling a girl.

"Shut up." Kenshin said, wanting more than ever to stop this conversation and just play.

"All right, we'll leave you alone." Sano said, backing off and strapping his bass guitar. "I asked for a new bass for by b-day…you know the one that was on display."

"And? What did Kamishimoemon say?"

"My father said, 'get the fuck out of here,' and went back to his work."

"Ouch." Yahiko said.

"Meh, he'll get it for me anyway." Sano shrugged. "I normally don't ask for shit."

Kenshin smiled as he dug his hand into his pocket for a guitar pick. "I'm sure he will. Alright, so Thursday we're going to sing 'Out Of My Head,' 'Free Dream,' 'Lullabies,' and a Beatles song?"

"I think we should do 'My Virtues' instead of 'Free Dream.'" Soujiro said. "I think it's a bit more polished…I think we need to work more on 'Free Dream' at a later date since we need to fix my and Yahiko's part. It's too much to do between now and Thursday."

"Good call, we'll do 'My Virtues.' So we're good?" Kenshin said. Sano, Soujiro, and Yahiko nodded in agreement. "Okay, sweet. Which Beatles song do you guys want to do?"

"Well, it depends…" Yahiko said slowly.

"Depends on what?"

"Do you…want to do some sort of tribute of sorts to your mom?" Yahiko replied softly. "I don't about you guys, but I feel guilty about playing on Thursday, it's not fair to you, Kenshin."

Sano and Soujiro murmured in agreement. Kenshin sighed and ran a hand through his bangs. "I'm _fine_. I told you, it's probably going to be the best thing for me. It really should be a normal day anyway." He added the last part in a quiet voice.

"We'll sing 'Let It Be.'" Sano said flatly.

"Look, we don't have to –" Kenshin started before being interrupted by Sano.

"Too bad, we are. Everyone good? Good. Let's just play, I'm ready to go deaf." Sano said as he started giving a beat. "Come on, Yahiko, let's roll."

Yahiko grinned and joined in a fast tempo. Soujiro sighed and shook his head before strumming his rhythm guitar.

Kenshin smiled as he watched his friends play, more grateful for them than ever. With that thought, he jumped in with a catchy melody and began singing, freeing himself from all thought, of course, never quite freeing himself from a certain blue-eyed girl.

* * *

A/N: I was inspired by two things to write this story. First and foremost, the skeleton of the love triangle was inspired from the ABC Family show _Greek, _a wonderfully hilarious show about college life and the Greek system (returning March 24th!!). Second, and it's so beyond _geeky_, is _The Great Gatsby_. 

Please review!

MissGoalie


	2. Countdown to Vacation: 4

A/N: Thank you to all for your reviews! I greatly appreciate it :)

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Countdown to Vacation: 4

April 10th in the year 1971 – one of the most devastating days in music history (at least in Kenshin's opinion).

The Beatles officially broke up.

Every time he told someone this, he, or she, would stare at him blankly before laughing. Yes, they agreed, it was pretty sad, but it wasn't the end of the world.

He came to hate this day ever since he, Soujiro, Sano, and Yahiko first formed First Absolute. The day was just sad overall, because such a great band, which created some of the greatest songs of all time, ended. Kenshin always wondered what else could The Beatles have come up with. If they all had stayed together a bit longer, could they have come up with a song that could've revolutionized the way society thought forever?

It was enough to drive Kenshin up the wall.

The only thing he could do was wear his favorite Beatles shirt, and listen to what The Beatles had managed to give to the world.

Of course, given his usual melancholy thoughts on his situation with Kaoru, he had to start the day off on a depressing note with listening to the song "Yesterday" to feed into his inner pain. Every lyric made him curl further under the covers. He felt like skipping school, but he knew his father wouldn't let him.

If any of his friends saw him like this, they would've called a therapist and put him on an anti-depressant.

With that thought, he sighed and pushed the covers back. Reaching a hand to his nightstand, he pointed the small remote for his iHome at his iPod and skipped the rest of "Yesterday" to the more cheerful "I Want To Hold Your Hand." Of course, all it made him think about was the fact that he wanted to hold _her_ hand, and not have her current asshole of a boyfriend hold it.

He grumbled as he stumbled out of bed to his closet next to his computer. Collapsing to his knees, he sorted through his messy closet in a half daze. When he pulled out a pair of jeans, his face broke out into an impish grin.

The pair of jeans he pulled out specifically on accident happened to look very good on him, according to Kaoru. She told him so with the most beautiful blush on her face. And since they had a class together first period…she was most vulnerable…she wasn't quite in her façade yet…

Full awake at that point, he pulled them on, scowling a little when he realized that they hung a little lower on his hips than normal. Apparently he lost weight from now and when she complimented him.

After brushing his teeth, he started humming along to the next Beatles song that came on as he took off the white shirt he slept in. Today he would be wearing a Beatles shirt with the artwork of the album Help! which was his favorite one by them. He knew that Sano would wear his Abbey Road shirt; Soujiro would wear one of the Rubber Soul cover, and Yahiko of Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.

Thinking of the band, he suddenly remembered that he was going to bring his acoustic guitar with him to school and then directly to rehearsal. They were going to work on the harmonizing problems that occurred the day before – Soujiro for some reason was very off.

At first he had a little difficulty remembering where he put his case for it since it was normally in his room. He managed to find it under his bed along with some missing shirts. Feeling more cheerful than earlier, he continued to hum to himself as he stuffed his iPod into his jeans and swung his bag over his shoulder.

A pot of coffee had already been made, thanks to Hiko, and a bagel was left out for him.

"Wow, dad, going all out." Kenshin muttered to himself with a small smile as he put the already cut bagel into the toaster oven. It was a rare occasion when Hiko did little things for Kenshin, reminding him that he was there, despite his ghost-like status in his life.

After two minutes of toasting, he quickly spread Chive and Onion cream cheese on his bagel and put the two pieces together, making a sandwich. He grabbed his car keys from the table and took his tan coat from the living room couch where he tossed it the night before.

His car was a gray 2003 Honda Accord, which he preferred to call the Himura Honda, or H.H. for short. He found it rather amusing that the "H" on the front could either represent Honda or Himura.

When he turned on the ignition he cursed when he read the dashboard. He only had fifteen minutes to get to school, which meant it would most likely take about ten to get to the school due to traffic, another five to find a parking spot and another couple of minutes to get to class.

Basically, he was going to be late.

"Fuckity shit." Kenshin mumbled as he quickly pulled out of his driveway and onto the street. He couldn't afford to be late again in Suzuki's Government class – he would start to lose credit and frankly, he didn't want to retake the course in his senior year. With that thought, he sped down the nearly empty streets, possible shaving off a few minutes off his lateness before he hit the line entering the school.

It took seven minutes to finally enter the school grounds and three to run from his car to the school. He almost laughed at the comical faces of his classmates. They had never seen him in a rush to get to one class.

He walked into the class at the same time the bell rang. He exclaimed in triumph, punching a fist in the air but slowly dropped it to his side when he realized Suzuki wasn't in the room.

The other students in the classroom laughed at him as he dejectedly walked to the back of the classroom where his seat was…next to Kaoru Kamiya.

He found great pleasure in the fact that Suzuki always put her students in boy-girl order. It gave him something to look forward to at the beginning of every new quarter. After three quarters, he was about to give up being seated next to Kaoru, but was very pleased to find that was exactly what Suzuki was planning.

Although he was happy to see Kaoru's lovely face first period, he was annoyed that he had to see Tomoe's face as well.

He couldn't manage to have a class with Kaoru without having her master or her lapdog of a boyfriend with her.

He sighed, trying to catch his breath from his pointless running as he pulled his iPod out and started listening to another Beatles song off of The White Album. As the guitar notes filled his ears, he looked toward Kaoru to see her talking to Tomoe, listening to her iPod in one ear. He side-glanced over to where Kaoru's iPod laid. Curiosity overwhelming him, he wordlessly took it from her desk, careful to make sure he didn't tug the earphone out of her ear. He grinned from ear to ear when he saw what she was listening to.

"What's with that shit-eating grin, Himura?" Tomoe asked coolly.

Kaoru whipped her head around, her earphone falling out in the process. She looked at her iPod in his hand and consequently turned a delicate shade of pink.

"Why don't you look at both our iPods?" Kenshin offered, pulling his earphones out and handing both iPods over to Tomoe before Kaoru could prevent him.

She looked at both the screens, her perfectly plucked eyebrows furrowing. "Wow, you guys are listening to the same song – that must mean you're soul mates." She said sarcastically before shooting an evil grin at him. Kenshin glared at her for a few moments, temporarily shocking her. He rarely expressed his anger toward anyone except Enishi.

He then sent a charming grin at Kaoru. "You're listening to a Beatles song. So you _did_ remember."

Kaoru scoffed. "To be perfectly honest, I completely forgot today was like…one of the worst days of your life."

His smile faltered a bit. "Then why were listening to them?"

She sighed. "I don't know…my iPod was on shuffle…" She trailed off.

"Yeah, Kaoru, why _were_ you listening to them? They're not even that great – I've never even heard of the song 'Dear Prudence' before." Tomoe asked.

Kenshin and Kaoru both turned on Tomoe. "_What?_" They both exclaimed at the same time.

Tomoe raised her eyebrows. "What?"

"How can you _not_ like The Beatles? They're _pure_ genius!" Kenshin said, his eyes widening.

"As much as I hate to say it, Kenshin's got a point. The Beatles are classic – and 'Dear Prudence' is just…a really good song."

"Exactly. I knew you still had some sense in you!" Kenshin said cheerfully.

Kaoru rolled her eyes at him while Tomoe stared down at Kaoru with a hard expression. "Well it doesn't matter what you two think, I still think that they're not the greatest. Not very catchy."

That was when Kenshin saw it – the first time Kaoru was visibly frustrated with her post-breakup life. She clenched her right hand into a tight fist, her knuckles turning white. It only lasted for a brief moment before she controlled herself.

"Of course, to each her own." Kaoru said.

"Yeah, I doubt you can be converted this late in life anyway." Kenshin sighed.

He saw Kaoru's nose twitch in annoyance, promptly signaling him to stop talking about it.

Their teacher entered the classroom casually with a cup of Starbucks coffee (that was actually hot chocolate – last time they had a chat about his late attendance he could smell it from a mile away) and her folders in arms.

"Good morning class," she greeted us as she placed her stuff down on her desk. "Did Mr. Himura come into class on time today?" She asked, eyeing him with the smallest hint of a smile.

He had officially charmed her.

* * *

"Are you serious? You guys were really listening to the same song?" Yahiko asked during lunch before taking a bite of his roast beef sandwich.

"Yeah, it was really weird. But you won't believe this – Tomoe doesn't like The Beatles." Kenshin said in a hushed tone, as if it was a mortal sin. He side glanced toward Soujiro, who was idly eating a bag of chips, looking out the window with a distant expression on his face.

Sano's jaw dropped at the same time Yahiko dropped his sandwich.

"Well…maybe she just meant that she doesn't like their lesser known stuff. You know, she's into the more commercial songs." Yahiko said, the first to break the silence.

"No, she clearly stated that, 'they weren't catchy.'" Kenshin said in a mocking voice.

Sano shook his head. "See, these stupid fucks that only listen to rap and all that shit has brainwashed them all."

"Are you okay, Sou?" Kenshin asked, breaking Soujiro out of his daze.

"Oh…sorry…I was just thinking…" He said in a soft voice.

"About what? Is everything alright?" Yahiko asked concernedly.

Soujiro pursed his lips in thought, not sure if he wanted to voice his thoughts. "I was just thinking…" He repeated in a slow voice.

"Thinking about what?" Sano questioned.

Soujiro let out a small breath through his lips. "I was listening to Rubber Soul this morning…and 'Nowhere Man' started playing and…I just…I feel like I can relate." He said, not looking at either of them.

The four lapsed into a silence, all thinking about what Soujiro just said. Kenshin was the first to understand Soujiro's train of thought. "We can all relate to that song a little bit." He said in a low voice.

"I know; that whole _'Isn't he a bit like you and me?'_ I get. But…" Soujiro responded with frustration, trailing off.

Kenshin lowered his eyes to the table in thought. He internally sang the song, trying to find which lyric would affect Soujiro in such a way. After singing it through twice, he found it. He mentally beat himself for not realizing sooner. It was the same train of thought he went through after his mother died.

"You're not invisible to us, Soujiro." Kenshin said, raising his eyes to meet Soujiro's. "You're like my brother. No, you _are_ my brother, you all are." He paused for a minute, allowing this to sink in. "We _can_ see you, Sou." He said with a smile.

Soujiro's eyes became glassy for a moment before he lowered his head, his bangs momentarily hiding them.

"Yeah, come on Soujiro, who would harmonize? I mean, seriously, I can't really sing, so we would be fucked in that department." Sano said, hitting his friend on the back in a way that was supposed to be friendly, but it ended up making Soujiro jerk forward into the table. "Sorry…got a bit excited…" Sano mumbled in apology.

"Who would be our voice of reason? Seriously, without you, we wouldn't be able to tame Kenshin." Yahiko said, jerking a thumb toward Kenshin.

Kenshin smiled and looked down at his untouched food. He wished someone had reassured him like that years ago when he was going through the same thing. He then processed exactly what Yahiko said and replied, "screw you, Yahiko. But seriously, what made you think of that?"

Soujiro sighed. "It was our last gig that we did. Some guy from Stab My Paranoia just said all this stuff…said he was like me in this other band and he get fucked over and…I don't know. I shouldn't have listened to him. He had way too many tattoos and piercings." Soujiro shuddered at the thought.

"Well, it's a damn good thing you let it out now. It was just rotting your brain. Hey, was that why you were kind of off yesterday? Kenshin, maybe you should pick up your electric from home." Sano said.

Kenshin sighed. "How annoying. But since we don't really have any problems, it's fine."

Suddenly feeling a pair of eyes on him, he looked over to the next table and saw Kaoru staring at him and his friends with a kind expression. When their eyes met, she smiled at him in what Kenshin thought to be one of pride.

He winked at her and returned the smile. She rolled her eyes and focused her attention back to her friends, but not before giving him a quick smile.

He wondered if she overheard their conversation.

* * *

Kaoru was always told by her parents that eavesdropping wasn't right…but that didn't mean that she was perfect at preventing herself from doing so.

Soujiro was seemingly the only mature member of First Absolute. He treated everyone with equal respect, and was kind to everyone. He was almost the father-figure of the group, being the most rational and considerate, which was why she was in shock when she overheard him practically saying that he felt shafted.

She groaned in frustration watching the three of them think, trying to figure out what Soujiro was trying to say, which she thought was obvious. When Kenshin first spoke, she dug her fingernails into the palm of her hands, annoyed.

_Come on, Kenshin, you're more intuitive than that._

She knew when it came to him, she could tell by the sudden spark in his eyes. The way they widened slightly, realization lightening in them. He wouldn't speak right away, though; he would pause for just another moment, thinking of the best way to word his realization properly, so there would be no misunderstandings.

Kenshin was good at that, seeing right through everyone's problems and helping them overcome. It was quite a remarkable gift he had. Too bad he never applied those abilities to the community or something worthy. Instead, he wasted it, along with his other talents which annoyed her to no end.

"Are you checking out your ex?" Misao whispered in Kaoru's ear.

Kaoru jumped and looked at Misao, not realizing she was there. "No! I was just listening in on their conversation – it was about Soujiro. I was concerned."

"Oh, pity," Misao said with a sigh. "Because Kenshin _is_ worth checking out. The jeans he's wearing today? My God, sexy ass." She said before getting up and joining his table.

Kaoru nearly choked on her own saliva. It _almost_ bothered her that Misao made such a comment. She immediately figured it was because Misao had better taste than him, and she was just saying that to annoy her.

"Hey, Kao, you wanna go dress shopping this weekend for prom? You have a critical eye." Megumi asked, eating some of her salad.

"Yeah, we can hit the mall in Milford. I'm excited for the Nautical theme." Kaoru responded, grinning at the thought.

"Yeah, that was a good call. You and Tomoe came up with it?"

"Actually…just me." Kaoru said somewhat proudly.

"Ah, very nice." Megumi said before looking up at the clock above Kaoru's head. "Kaoru! We have to go – lab lunch ended three minutes ago!"

"Shit!" Kaoru said, quickly throwing out the rest of her lunch and swinging her backpack on.

The two ran out of the cafeteria, not realizing that two pairs of eyes were watching them.

* * *

"Kenshiiin…" Kenshin heard Misao say as she slid down the bench and consequently crashed into him.

"Misao…" He said, gently pushing her off him.

"When's Urban Center coming here?" She asked with large, green eyes.

"Oh, come on Weasel, are you _still_ hung up on the Iceman?" Yahiko groaned.

Misao glared at Yahiko before reaching over the table and slapping him. "Don't call him that! Aoshi isn't like that!" She said harshly before turning her attention back to Kenshin, her eyes dreamy once more. "Well?"

"I don't know – I don't _want_ to know what gigs Urban Center plays in." He responded, finally getting around to taking a bite of an apple.

She rolled her eyes. "Are you _serious?_ You and Yumi _still_ do that? Let fate run its course or some other shit like that?"

Kenshin sighed. "Yes. You wouldn't understand it…it's a long story." He said vaguely.

"You'd think you _want_ to know so you could hook up with her more." She muttered to herself, causing Kenshin to choke on his apple.

"How do _you_ know about that?" He hissed while the rest of First Absolute started laughing.

"Aoshi told me. Friends with benefits deal. I honestly don't care about it since I know you're still hung up on Kaoru." All the boys rested their eyes on Kenshin, who only gave a noncommittal shrug. The boys didn't exactly know how much he really was still hung up on her. Misao seemed to have caught on and immediately sighed loudly, refocusing attention onto her. "So how can I find out? You have any peeps I can talk to? Or even better, his cell phone number?!"

Kenshin laughed. "No, I don't have his cell, but I think their MySpace page is working now, you can check that out. But if you do, _don't_ give me any hint about when, or where, they're performing, okay?"

She nodded excitedly. "Okay! Thanks, Ken! You're a pal." She sighed again, looking as if she were a thousand miles away. "Oh, how I've missed him. When was the last time you saw them?"

He thought for a moment. "I don't know…was it at Milford?" Soujiro nodded in confirmation. "So about a month ago." Kenshin answered.

"Did he ask about me?" She asked hopefully, her eyes shining.

Kenshin closed his eyes and thought back to that night. Right before he left with Yumi to her van, he had exchanged pleasantries with Aoshi, her brother, which was very brief given that he wasn't a very sociable person. However, he suddenly remembered Yumi asking of Kaoru's wellbeing as she always did…and then…

"_How's that other girl friend of yours…Misao?"_

"Actually, he did ask about you. Asked how you were." He said in a somewhat shocked voice.

Misao gasped before squealing loudly. Yahiko and Sano groaned and held their ears while Soujiro winced in discomfort.

"Yes! I _knew_ he felt something for me!" She exclaimed.

"How could you tell? He has the same damn expression on his face. It's actually quite comical how different Aoshi and you are." Yahiko said, directing his last comment to Sano.

"He's one damn good bass player." Sano said, shaking his head.

Misao sighed. "He's amazing…"

"Why don't you talk about your precious Aoshi with your _girl_ friends?" Yahiko grumbled.

She reached over to slap him again. "Because nobody at that table knows of Aoshi except Kaoru, and frankly she wouldn't really be interested." She answered in a sad tone.

"I wouldn't put it past her." Soujiro said positively. "I think she still cares for the old crowd." Sano gave him a look. "Deep in her heart." Soujiro added.

Kenshin rolled his eyes. "Right. And my brother's actually going to talk to me this year." He said bitterly.

"Hey, no sulking. It's not becoming." Soujiro said lightly.

"Actually, I beg to differ. I've been told multiple times that when I'm in 'emo mode,' as you gents so kindly put it, I'm quite the sexy guy."

Sano rolled his eyes. "What _is_ it with girls being attracted to girly, emo guys?" Kenshin punched him in the shoulder. "Hah! Nothing compared to my punch, little person."

"You know what? I'm not taking this anymore, I'm leaving you shitheads." Kenshin said, throwing out his apple core. He was about to stand up when he saw Kaoru and Megumi run out of the cafeteria, momentarily frozen.

"What do you think Megumi's reaction would be if I asked her out?" Sano asked suddenly. Kenshin looked over at his friend whose dark eyes were lingering by the door.

"No reaction." Soujiro piped.

"What? How is that possible?"

"Because she'll be emotionally confused as to _why_ you would want to ask her out." Soujiro said simply.

"Then I think she'd laugh at you." Yahiko added.

"Why, do you fancy the bonny lass?" Kenshin asked in a Scottish accent.

Sano shrugged. "Not particularly right now. She just seems like an interesting person."

"Now _who_ exactly are you talking about – her chest or her ass?" Yahiko asked wisely. Sano punched Yahiko in the arm. "Ouch! Fucker! I'm gonna get a huge bruise, asshole!"

"I mean it, dude. But she seems to be like a cousin of the Iceman."

"Well…she doesn't talk about you. So that's a good thing – you're not on her bad list or anything." Misao said.

"Are you even friends with her?" Yahiko asked.

Misao shrugged. "Kind of. We have mutual friends. She's basically Kaoru's friend." She said sadly.

"Kaoru still considers you her closest friend, no worries." Soujiro said comfortingly.

She shook her head. "I don't know. I mean, yeah, we hang out sometimes, but she's just busy with all this stuff and there's nothing to talk about now…it's really sad."

"I wouldn't ask her." Kenshin said quietly, causing everyone to look at him.

"Yeah, it's probably not a good idea. I'll wait until I _actually_ become friends with her." Sano said, nodding, liking his plan.

"Wow, you're growing up little Sano!" Misao gushed, reaching over to pinch his cheek.

"Agh! Get off me woman!" He swapped her hand away.

Kenshin sighed as he looked up at the ceiling of the cafeteria. It might have been a little harsh for him to reject Sano's idea of asking Megumi out, but he couldn't bear the thought of witnessing one of his best friends dating someone like her, like Kaoru.

* * *

At the end of the day, Kenshin reached his parked car at the end of the junior parking lot. Or…at least where his car was _supposed _to be. He felt his stomach drop when he saw the empty space where his car was in the morning. He closed his eyes, hoping more than anything that he was hallucinating. Opening them again, he swore rather loudly when he realized that his car was in fact gone.

He walked to the middle of the parking spot and sat down, earning funny looks at everyone. He forced himself to calm himself before doing anything irrational. When he got his heart rate down to a relatively normal pace, he tried to think of who would steal his car. He knew that two sets of keys were given to him when he first got the car – one he kept for himself, the other…

He quickly stood up and called home, hoping that his father would be able to confirm if the second set of keys were gone.

After a few rings, an exasperated Hiko answered the phone. "Hello?"

"Dad – I need you to check something for me." Kenshin said, beginning to walk out of the parking lot and to the entrance of the school.

He heard some shuffling on the other line. "Uh, Kenshin, I'm busy at the moment, I'll call you later."

"But it's –" Kenshin froze when he heard a distinct moan…that was not masculine.

He dropped his phone in disbelief, not hearing the crack of his phone hitting the pavement, sending the battery flying. _Never_ did he conceive the thought that his father would actually…

He nearly vomited at the thought of someone other than his mother in his parents' bed. Trying to think clearly, he picked up his phone and found his battery in the middle of the road. Yes, he had considered the fact that his father would be lonely with the death of his wife. But, Kenshin thought his father had the decency to keep it out of their house.

He briefly wondered what Sozo would say if he found out.

It suddenly hit him like an unexpected kick to the face – Sozo took the car.

Growling, he sped walked out, muttering obscenities at his older brother. Because of him, Kenshin would have to make a five-mile walk home, which he was not looking forward to given that large clouds were beginning to role in.

"Could this day get _any_ worse?" Kenshin exclaimed. Almost as if he was in a movie, it began to lightly drizzle. "Just great. I _knew_ I should've skipped, but no, dad had to make me frigging go. Probably just so he could have the house alone to fuck whoever –" His words caught in his throat. He shoved his hands deeper into his pockets as he slowed his pace. He wanted to be caught in the rain so he could allow some his emotions to leak through.

As expected, it began to pour. He pretended that the rain falling on his face was his own tears, since he hadn't cried himself in years. His thoughts turned less depressing as he considered written lyrics for the situation that he was in at the moment. During his thinking, he couldn't hear the honking through the thunder.

"Kenshin!" A scream brought him to reality to find Kaoru in her car with the window down, looking at him with a concerned expression. He would've been happy with this situation at any other time…except this time Enishi was sitting in the passenger seat, wanting to be anywhere else. "I'll drop you home." She said, unlocking the door.

Without having much of a choice, he got into the car, shivering at the difference in temperature.

There was an extremely awkward silence. Kenshin was trying to keep his teeth from chattering while Kaoru was internally struggling with herself, wondering if she should inquire about why he was walking home in such weather, or to just keep her mouth shut. Enishi, on the other hand, wisely kept quiet and looked out the window.

When she turned into his street, Kenshin put his hands on the back of the driver's seat and told her frantically to pass by his house.

She slowed down, looking at him with raised eyebrows. "Why? Where are you supposed to…go…" she trailed off, looking at the second car in the driveway that did not belong to Mr. Himura. It was very feminine – a silver blue Audi.

Kaoru accelerated, passing past his house. He watched her knuckles turn white on the steering wheel.

"What are you doing?" Enishi asked, speaking for the first time since Kenshin got into the car.

"He's going to stay at my house for a few hours." Kaoru said softly, loosening her grip slightly. Kenshin saw Enishi clench his jaw in annoyance before leaning back in the seat. He would normally take pride in annoying Enishi, but this day was beyond normal by any means. "I think my mom is going to have a heart attack when she sees you – you're really white. And shaking." Kaoru said as she pulled into her garage not even a minute later.

"It's not _that_ cold, Himura." Enishi said, not being able to prevent himself from starting a fight.

Kenshin shot him a nasty glare as he got out of the car, dragging his wet messenger bag with him.

"I think she'll be more worried about other things." He murmured to himself as he followed them inside.

He found himself correct when Mrs. Kamiya froze when she saw him come forward soaked to the bone. She then seemed to have come to her senses for she walked over to him and started to pull the hem of his shirt up. "Get out of these wet clothes this _instant!_ Do you want to catch the flu?" She exclaimed.

He smiled as she tried to calm her down. To do this, he took off his shirt for her as he walked up the stairs where Kaoru and Enishi were taking off their coats.

"You should take a hot shower – how long have you been outside in this? Oh, God, if you get sick –" Mrs. Kamiya continued to rant as she pushed him from behind.

"I'm fine, really, just some dry clothes would be nice." He said in an exasperated tone, his arms crossed over his chest, trying to rub the goose bumps from his arms away.

Kaoru froze at the sight of Kenshin for a few moments before shaking her head and turning to Enishi who was staring at Kenshin with a strange emotion on his face. If Kenshin wasn't so driven to get dry, he would've immediately coined the emotion to be jealously.

Kaoru's mother never showed as much affection to Enishi as she did with Kenshin.

"I'll bring you down some of your old clothes – they'll still fit hopefully." Mrs. Kamiya said as she walked up the stairs to the attic.

Kenshin chuckled, meeting Kaoru's gaze, who weakly smiled back. He walked up the stairs to the bathroom, stripping down to his boxers as he waited for Mrs. Kamiya to come to the door with dry clothes.

* * *

Kaoru sighed before smiling at Enishi. "So, I think we should finish the research a bit and then we'll start with making the poster."

"Look…Kaoru…you know I don't pry into your past relationship with Kenshin…but…why did you bring him here?" He asked with a low voice, not wanting to be overheard by the redhead himself.

She closed her eyes, picturing Kenshin's sad face in the rain, almost wanting to cry herself. "Someone's at his house…that he would rather not see." She said.

"Well, that's very vague." He stated.

She bit her bottom lip. "You _cannot_ tell _anyone_ about this, got it? It's really personal." She whispered sternly. He was slightly taken aback, but nodded. She sighed again. "A woman. His father brought someone home, okay?"

"Oh…" He said softly, actually feeling sorry for Kenshin for the first time since he had learned that he had lost his mother at eleven-years-old. "I'm sorry. I had no idea it was like that, as bad of an excuse that is."

Kaoru gave him a quick smile. "Don't worry about it. It's just that…I knew Mrs. Himura for a long time, you know? She was like a second mother to me at the time." She said quietly as they walked up the stairs to the computer room where all the arts and crafts were.

He shook his head. "I could never imagine what pain he must've gone through. You'd never think it."

She shut the door and sighed. "No, you wouldn't know unless you knew him long enough. He's got a problem with expressing his emotions."

"Not with his hatred toward me." He said, an amused smile on his face.

She swallowed. "It depends…he's passionate about certain things." She said slowly, her eyes drifting away from Enishi's.

"Well, he should know by now that I'm not going anywhere." He said strongly, wrapping his warm arms around her. She automatically leaned into his strong chest, her hands resting on top of his. "I love you, Kao. You know that." He whispered in her ear.

She smiled. "Yeah, I know." She said before breathing deeply.

She didn't feel comfortable with the fact that her ex was a few doors down while she was having this intimate moment with another guy.

* * *

Mrs. Kamiya brought Kenshin clothes he hadn't worn since freshman year. He was jubilant for a moment when he realized that the old jeans were a little shorter. But then he remembered the reason why he was there in the first place and immediately became somber.

He stepped out of the bathroom and walked down to the kitchen where Mrs. Kamiya would be. She was chopping lettuce when he walked in, giving the image of the typical stay at home mother.

He hadn't seen that image in so long.

She stopped her chopping and greeted him with a kind smile, which he returned. He walked over to her and was immediately brought into a tight hug.

"You've gotten thinner." She murmured softly by his ear.

He pulled away and gave her a sad smile. "I'm a growing boy, Mrs. Kamiya. It's fine."

She pursed her lips, showing her disagreement yet not saying anything. "How have you been this past year?" She asked, walking over to the coffee machine and pouring him a mug.

He could never tell her the heartache her daughter had caused him. He would never do that to her – she was like a second mother to him. "I've been floating along." He said, trying to keep his voice light.

"Yes, you're always good at that." She said with a small smile, handing him his mug and taking a seat at the circular wooden table that had been at the house for as long as he could remember. He took a seat in the chair he usually sat in without thinking.

"How have you been?" He asked her, taking a sip.

"Oh, fine. Just…it's been hard with my mom being ill."

"Yeah, Kaoru told me." He said quietly.

Mrs. Kamiya ran a finger over the rim of her green mug. "I think she'd like to see you." She said before catching his gaze with her dark blue eyes.

"I'd love to see her…but I don't know if Kaoru…would want me to." He said carefully.

Mrs. Kamiya sighed loudly, catching him off-guard. "Kenshin, to be honest with you, I never liked the settlement that you two agreed with. There's no way that two people that have done absolutely everything together can just completely cut each other off. It's not right."

He held his tongue. It wasn't him who came up with that idea – it was Kaoru. "We both were going in different directions…" He said, repeating what she told him over a year ago.

"Those aren't your words." She stated calmly, taking a long drink.

He closed his eyes, bringing his slightly shaking hands under the table. "Look…" he opened his mouth before shutting it again, not quite finding the right words. After a moment of thinking he tried again. "This year has been _really_ hard as it is. The last thing I want…or need…is for one more person regretting what happened between us…because nobody regrets it more than I do." He opened his eyes, giving her a pleading look.

She nodded slowly. "Okay." She whispered.

His hands somewhat stopped shaking. He brought them back to the mug and took another sip of coffee.

"How's your music been? I see signs around town." She said, trying to change the topic.

However, that comment made him think about his guitar and how it was somewhere with his older brother, being subjected to all sorts of things. He lowered his head, gritting his teeth together.

"Kenshin…?"

"I'm sorry…it's just…" He put down the mug on the table. "I just…want my guitar…" He finished, screwing his eyes shut, not noticing that his hands were shaking.

Mrs. Kamiya reached out with both her hands held his trembling ones. He looked up to her tear-filled eyes. "Kenshin…" She whispered.

He cleared his throat. "I should go…I need to call my friends. They're probably freaking out about me not showing up for rehearsal." He stood up and was about to walk out when Mrs. Kamiya stood up as well, the scraping of the chair against the tile stopping him in his tracks.

"Please…come over again. At least for some family dinner of sorts. Koshijiro misses their weekly golf outings." She said, trying to smile, referring to her husband and his father.

Kenshin forced a smile, despite the thought of his father made him sick to his stomach. "Yeah…we can try. Bye Mrs. Kamiya. Tell Kaoru I said thanks for driving me." He tipped an imaginary hat at her, earning him a wider smile from her.

"Bye, Kenshin. Take the umbrella by the door."

He walked out of the kitchen without looking back. However, at the front door he froze and looked at the staircase where Kaoru and Enishi were. He shook his head to clear thoughts of the two of them together before stepping outside.

Opening the umbrella with one hand, he dialed Sano's cell phone number with his other. He only had to wait a second before he was bombarded with questions.

"_Where the _hell_ were you?"_ Sano demanded.

"_Yeah, we heard that you were walking home – why?"_ Yahiko asked.

"_What happened to your car?"_ Soujiro asked.

Kenshin sighed. "Sozo took my car."

There was a silence on the other end of the line for a minute before Yahiko said, _"seriously?"_

"Yeah…"

"_Why didn't Hiko just pick you up then?" Sano inquired._

Kenshin swallowed loudly as he tried to word his response in the most calm and mature way. What came out was, "he brought a fucking whore to screw," which wasn't exactly the most tact thing. Besides, she most likely was a coworker, but that was beside the point.

Another silence. _"Oh…well…God Kenshin…I have no idea what to say."_ Soujiro said in a small voice.

Kenshin sighed. "I'm sorry, I don't expect anything, but that's why I wasn't there. Tomorrow I'll just steal my dad's car so no worries."

"_Are you gonna be okay, mate?"_ Sano asked.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I'll just avoid my dad, my house is big enough."

"_Okay…well if you need anything like a ride to school or whatever just call me…before seven if you don't mind. I need to know these things ahead of time."_

Kenshin gave a chuckle. "Thanks. I'll see you tomorrow." He pocketed his cell phone and sighed. He was already home.

* * *

"_Hi. Leave a message._" He heard Sozo's voice say shortly before a long beep.

"I'm going to beat the living _shit_ out of you, Sozo! Who the hell do you think you are – you can't just fucking take my car whenever you fucking want!" Kenshin yelled, pacing around in his father's closet. Hiko had the intelligence to leave the house, so Kenshin was allowed some space. He was in his father's closet to confirm that the spare keys to his car were taken.

When a picture of the family caught his eye, the picture with his redhead mother laughing as she held him and Sozo, his anger dissolved and was replaced with sorrow. Somehow despite the extreme likeness between Kenshin and his mother, Sozo still managed to look part of the family. "But before I do that, you have to bite dad's head off because he brought another woman to our house." Kenshin said softly. He felt his right hand begin to shake so he switched the phone to his left. "Maybe we can both do it – it'll give him the biggest shock since we haven't seen each other in over a year. Make him fucking moan." He hissed angrily.

He strode out of the closet in complete fury to his room, thankful that all those years ago he won the coin toss as to who would get the bedroom.

His anger subsided once again, and all that he was left with was his shaking hands. "The real point of me calling was to basically say that…I don't want my guitar being fucked around with. I'll kill you for that – do you understand me? You have _no_ idea how much it means to me." He ended in a whisper before hanging up.

Walking up the three steps to his room, he shut the door quietly and grabbed his electric guitar from the corner of his room. He took it from its case and plugged it into the amp. The volume was turned up to the max, and all that Kenshin could hear was the ground-breaking riffs from his guitar, slowly taking over his mind so he could think no more.

* * *

A/N: Did that chapter leave you satisfied? Did it make you want to tear your hair out because it sucked? I will never know unless you REVIEW! Of course if it sucked, please be considerate and try to calm yourself before writing the review despite its horridness :)

Parting words: GIANTS VS. PATRIOTS! Yes!

MissGoalie


	3. Countdown to Vacation: 3

A/N: Umm…I wish it was summer. School is just a pain in the ass. But midterms are done so I'm pretty happy...one more semester to go! (bangs head repeatedly)

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Countdown to Vacation: 3 

For the first time in a few months, Kaoru ate breakfast with her mother before going to school. While drinking their coffee, each waited for the other to say something about Kenshin's stay the day before. However, Kaoru was afraid to say anything…because she knew what would happen.

She would break down and cry for him.

"I thought you said he took the break up well." Her mother inquired calmly after carefully chewing the last of the eggs on her plate.

"He did…he didn't freak out or anything…"

Her mother sighed. "Kaoru, you _know_ he doesn't show his emotions like that."

Kaoru sighed as well. "Look, one of us was bound to get hurt – it's a break up! Of course it hurts! I was hurt too, but I managed to get over it." She said as she rubbed her eyes, still tired.

"Did you?" Her mother whispered softly. She shook her head. "You don't realize how important you are to him. He's protective of you, always was."

"He's just bitter that I fell in love with Enishi, who fits into his 'people who fake it' list." Kaoru snapped as she slammed her mug onto the table.

"Do you remember when his hands first started shaking?" Her mother said coolly, despite her daughter's rude attitude.

Kaoru stopped chewing. She barely managed to swallow it before pushing her plate away, suddenly not hungry. "Yeah…it was the day after his mom's funeral." She said softly.

She didn't know what happened between the time she left to go home and the next day she saw him. But when she first saw him after the funeral, his hands were continually shaking. It frightened her. When she asked him about why his hands shook, he refused to respond. To this day, she still had no idea as to what caused him to be so challenged in emotional expression.

His hands shook only during times when he was emotionally stressed. After that fateful day, his hands continued to shake, unable to find any release for his pains.

Until he picked up his guitar.

His mother had signed him up for guitar lessons, hoping he would be musically gifted. But about a week after the funeral when he had nothing to do, he picked up the guitar and began to practice.

"_It was almost as if a switch had turned on."_ Kenshin had explained to her when they were thirteen, when he no longer needed lessons. _"I just couldn't stop. I was in this state of peace where nobody could touch me."_

"My friends didn't approve." Kaoru whispered, looking down at the granite counter, fixated on a white vein that ran across to where her mother sat.

There was a tense silence that lasted a minute before her mother asked, "I just don't understand…why did you do it?"

"I told you mom…" Kaoru started.

"Don't give me that bullshit that Kenshin gave me earlier." Her mother stated flatly, catching Kaoru off-guard.

"Why? What did he tell you?" She asked, surprised at her mother's bluntness.

"Something about going in different directions. No doubt you told him that."

"We were at different frequencies." She whispered, almost as if she was correcting her.

"No, you weren't. What you two had was…" Her mother shook her head.

"Mom, I'd rather you stop talking about Kenshin. I don't want to talk about him. Let's talk about my _current_ boyfriend."

"Okay, let's talk about him. Your father and I aren't so sure about this trip to St. John's." Her mother stated simply.

"Why? I can take care of myself!"

Her mother gave her a look. "Honey, I'm no fool. I was seventeen once. I just don't trust _him._"

"He loves me! He wouldn't hurt me – and he wouldn't do something if I didn't want him to."

Mrs. Kamiya dropped her fork and stared at her daughter with narrowed eyes. "I will not have my daughter sleeping with a boy under the age of eighteen. I won't."

"Mom! How embarrassing! Don't meddle into my life!" Kaoru exclaimed, turning bright pink.

"That's what mother's are supposed to do."

"Sometimes Kenshin has it so _easy._" Kaoru muttered as she stood up to dump her plate into the sink.

"No, Kaoru, Kenshin _never_ has it easy." Her mother said in a voice that made Kaoru stop in her tracks. "He wishes for what we have. I saw it in his eyes every time he looked at you and your dad…you and me…it's enough to make your heart bleed."

Tears stung in Kaoru's eyes as she tried to control her emotions. "I didn't mean it." She whispered, screwing her eyes shut.

She heard her mother sigh behind her. "We'll talk about this later. Right now, I'd offer Kenshin a ride to school since I doubt he succeeded in taking Hiko's car."

Kaoru swallowed and nodded, pulling out her cell phone and leaving the kitchen to be alone. She thoughtlessly dialed his number, still engraved in her memory.

* * *

Kenshin was still shaking from his nightmare. 

The night before he had fallen asleep to the uneasy sounding "I Want You (She's So Heavy)" by The Beatles and all he could see was Kaoru dancing around him, getting close to him, but never quite touching him. Then his mother would sometimes come to his vision with her beautiful smile on her face before collapsing, just like what happened six years ago. The lightness of Kaoru's body dancing and the heaviness of his mother's lifeless one caused emotions that he couldn't name to rush through him.

The ring of his cell phone shook him from his thoughts. He slowly walked to the other side of the room only to be staring at the caller I.D. in shock. When he opened the phone, he had to clear his throat.

"Hello?"

"_Kenshin?"_ She sounded timid.

"Hi…Kaoru…what's up?" He asked slowly.

"_I just…well…do you need a ride to school? I figured that you wouldn't be successful in stealing your…his car."_

"I was planning on doing it, but I slept through the alarm. Had a bad dream."

"_Oh…I'm sorry. Well, do you want one? Because I'm gonna have to leave now."_

"It depends."

He heard her sigh. _"It'll just be the two of us, happy?"_

A ghost of a smile was apparent on his face. "Yeah, I'll be waiting outside." With that he hung up. He continued to sit and cradle his cell phone for a few moments before getting up and throwing on a jean jacket.

He walked past the kitchen, knowing that his stomach wouldn't be able to hold any food for a few hours. Whenever he suffered a nightmare of that sort, his stomach and hands tended to stuffer the consequences.

He took his car keys by habit, pocketing them despite not needing them. Sending a quick text to Sano, he merely said, "need no ride kao offered." He cringed at the thought of the gang running over to him and asking what happened in full detail. Or as Yahiko would say, "tell us the dirty truth."

Kenshin wasn't quite sure what they would expect, and frankly, he didn't really want to know.

With that thought, he saw Kaoru's blue car slow in front of his yard. He sighed as he brought the strap of his bag across his chest as he stood up from his front step. He smiled at her as he walked to her car. He felt better sitting in the front as opposed to the back – feeling that he was actually on equal ground with her.

"How are you?" She asked.

"I've been better." He admitted, looking down to his jeans at a small circle he drew in pen on the side of his knee a few weeks ago.

She nodded understandingly. "My mom was really glad to see you yesterday."

He smiled, still not looking up. "Yeah, it was nice to see her too. She's as beautiful as always," he said with a hint of the charming smile that she and dozens of girls had fallen for playing on his lips.

Kaoru let out a small chuckle. "I'll be sure to tell her that – a handsome youth complimenting her will make her feel like she's on cloud nine."

"She's a beautiful person inside and out – she should be told that everyday." He said seriously.

She bit her bottom lip, not being prepared for his seriousness. "Yeah…I know." She wanted to screw her eyes shut and curl herself into a ball. "I take her for granted sometimes." She revealed quietly.

Kenshin sighed sadly and leaned back into the seat. "I'm not gonna lecture you about it – you already know what to do." He said lightly with a shrug.

She let out a breath of relief. "If there's one thing about you that I will always appreciate is your low tolerance for bullshit, like you don't preach crap."

"You'd be surprised how high my tolerance has become." He muttered, staring at her pointedly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She asked in an even voice.

He could tell she was beginning to get annoyed. He knew he only had about a minute to get everything off his chest. "You say you admire my low tolerance for bullshit? That I tell it like it is? Okay, I'll give it to you, but you already know all of this: I think you're relationship with Enishi is fake. Unconsciously you know it's true. I think your friends don't know anything about you – if a friend can't understand your love for a Beatles song, then how the _hell_ can she understand _anything_ about you? I –"

She interrupted him with a surprisingly steady voice. "I don't want to hear anything else come out of your mouth. How _dare_ you. I offer you a ride from the –"

"I'm officially making this car a no-bullshit zone – your mom put you up to this, don't lie."

She flushed. "Even so, I agreed one-hundred and fifty percent. And you thank me by saying all this awful stuff about my life. _Get over it_. You have no right to say anything about what I do." She said strongly as she stopped the car, falling into place in the long line to enter the school.

"That may be true, but I only say it because it bothers me. I hate watching you act like the ghost of what you used to be."

"I'm just the same as before, except I've changed music preferences and wear nicer clothes."

"The music you listen to shows who you are."

"Yeah, _to you_."

"No, it's true. The fact that you made a complete one-eighty change in music preferences just supports the fact that you completely changed who you were."

"You know what, Kenshin, _some_ people grow up. I grew out of everything, and I'm sorry to say, but that included you." He couldn't help but widen his eyes and swallow loudly. His hands began to shake a little by his sides. "The way you just don't care about school just frightens me – how you can't look more than a month into the future."

"Well surely you can understand that." He said, trying to keep the anger that rarely surfaced under control.

Kaoru sighed loudly. "Yeah, I understand, but I mean you still need to have a _plan_. You're so _smart_, Kenshin. Why can't you stop avoiding expectations and own up to what you can do?"

"We're not having this discussion. I _refuse_ to talk about this for the _millionth_ time, _especially_ at seven o'clock in the morning."

"I only do so because I _care_." She finally admitted in an angry haze.

"Hah!" He exclaimed, his eyes wide. "Then _surely_ you can understand that I said all that stuff earlier because _I care too_." He stated with conviction, pointing to his chest, more specifically his heart. His hands stopped shaking.

She froze, realizing the weight of what they just said. They were caught in each other's gaze, both oblivious to the outside world until loud honking broke the moment. She quickly sped up and entered the school, not once glancing at him.

* * *

Throughout her morning classes she couldn't help be rerun her conversation with Kenshin over and over in her mind. She knew she was being antisocial, but at the moment she truly didn't care. 

They had finally admitted what she thought was going to be left unsaid: they still cared for each other.

One part of her mind immediately came to the safe conclusion that he was just looking out for her like a good _friend_. He was only trying to inch his way back into her life so they could be friends once more. Of course, not as close as they used to be, but friends all the same.

But then there was the other part which wouldn't yield – that he still had deep feelings for her. That she possibly still held a few feelings for him, as small as they may be.

She nearly groaned out loud. The only reason she would ever have feelings for Kenshin Himura would be because he was her first crush. Yes, she reasoned with herself, forcing her body to sit a bit straighter in her chair. After all, he was her first for quite a number of things.

She let out a breath. She refused to think about him for another second. How could she when Enishi was sending her adorable looks of concern from across the room?

* * *

"Man, you gotta chill. Sozo will get your car back. Besides, he probably put the guitar in the trunk." Yahiko said, dropping his pencil on his desk in frustration. Their drawing teacher had left the room and Kenshin had been tapping his feet in a constant tempo for the past fifteen minutes. 

"Knowing him he probably threw it over a bridge or something…" Kenshin muttered before groaning.

Yahiko shook his head. "I don't think he would've done that."

"How would you know?" Kenshin hissed. "You don't _know_ my brother."

"Well neither do you, you said so yourself." Yahiko retorted, narrowing his eyes. "I'm trying to stay positive here – don't go jumping down my throat, okay?"

Kenshin took a deep breath, feeling sheepish. "Sorry…it's just…stressful."

Yahiko stared at Kenshin blankly. "I don't think I've ever heard you say that in my life. You're _never_ stressed…about _anything_."

Kenshin shrugged. "When it comes to my music and you guys, it's possible." He brought his head into his arms on the desk. "I've had that guitar for years." He said with a muffled voice.

"I know…I know…" Yahiko said sadly, understanding, yet at the same time, almost pitying him.

Kenshin felt somewhat disgusted with himself. He hated being pitied – he supposed it was due to his mother's death when everyone would look at him the same way. This was why he pointedly avoided Yahiko for the rest of the period and tried to focus on the still life in front of them.

Of course, nobody could quite leave him alone because after the bell rang in Pre-Calculus, Saito said, "Kenshin…can you wait a second?" while giving him a pointed look as everyone was rushing to get out of the classroom.

Kenshin's eyes immediately shot open and he froze in the doorway. He whipped his head around and strode over to Saito's desk. "If you mention him…" he started in a low voice.

"I didn't have to – you did." Saito sighed. "This is completely off the record – no teacher-student boundaries." Kenshin looked as if he was about to say something, but kept his mouth closed and nodded instead. "Look, he didn't tell me the whole story, but I can figure out the missing pieces. He feels horrible about it."

Kenshin snorted. "Oh, really? Well why doesn't he tell me like the fucking man he plays himself to be."

"Because you won't let him, idiot." He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. "I'm not defending him. I'm not saying what he did was appropriate – it certainly wasn't. All I'm saying is that he is your father…and you aren't the only one who has been suffering." He opened his narrow eyes and shook his head. "What is it with teenagers and not looking beyond their own miseries?"

"He's an adult and he never looked beyond his own." Kenshin hissed, glaring at Saito. "He has no idea with Sozo and I went through."

"That's because you don't talk about it. So why would he talk about it when all you ever do is block it out?"

Kenshin froze before looking down at the yellow post-its on Saito's desk. "I'm late to English," he said in a soft voice, "can you write a pass?"

Saito let out the smallest of sighs and complied with his request. He had done enough damage – there was no use beating sense into a child who already knew what to do.

It was then Kenshin realized his mistake in admitting his feelings to Kaoru that morning. Although he knew with all his soul they were true, it didn't give him the right to say them. That was why he walked with new-found purpose to gym class, planning to officially apologize.

Of course, it was nearly impossible for him to get her alone since she was busy talking to Enishi. Thankfully, Mrs. Mimura decided to pair Kenshin and Kaoru together for throwing and catching. He took advantage of the opportunity.

"Kaoru, I'm really sorry about what I said. You're right, it's not my place. It's your life, do what you wish. I hate it when people try and get involved with mine, so why should I do the same to others?" He said with sincerity.

She caught the ball and froze, completely not expecting him to apologize and actually look at her with _honesty_ and _seriousness_, the latter something he rarely associated himself with. He seemed to have read her train of thought because he quickly added, "I know this is, like, huge and whatever, but I can be serious when necessary, you know that."

She gave him a weak smile and nodded. "Yeah, and it blows me away every time." She admitted softly.

He grinned at her in a cocky manner for a number of reasons. One, because he couldn't have the rest of the school taking advantage of this fact. Two, because it was a normal reaction of his when he received a compliment that had actual meaning. And three, because he couldn't have her continue to stare at him like that – like he was the only person in the gym. All it did was make his chest ache because he knew it wasn't true – there was still one other person and that was her current boyfriend.

She expectantly rolled her eyes at him, ending the moment and freeing him from her unknowing clutches. Mimura placed Kaoru and Enishi together on one team and Kenshin on the other, truly representing the real-life situation.

Oh how he _hated_ cliché moments. It was a scene from a movie being played out in reality. He nearly laughed in the middle of the class, realizing that he must be the underdog, which meant that he was favored to win the girl, right?

He hoped so as he watched her laugh with Enishi, his stomach twisting at the sight.

It didn't help that he shared fries with Sano the period before. As he thought about it more, probably just having fries in his stomach wasn't the best idea. With that, he excused himself to "go to the bathroom" when he reality he went to the cafeteria and bought a water bottle and a bagel. He didn't come back until the last fifteen minutes of the period. When he did, Enishi said, "constipated?" earning him a bout of laughter.

Kenshin smiled pleasantly. "No, just seeing your face disturbed me so much that I needed to leave the gym."

The class laughed harder at that comment. Kaoru stared at him blankly, to which he promptly ignored. He had every right to make a comment – his dignity was at stake!

But then Mimura said, "more like you wanted to eat," making everyone stare at her in shock. Of course they assumed he went to the cafeteria, but they didn't think she would be that sharp.

Kenshin shrugged with a little sheepishness at her and smiled. It was nothing against her in particular, it was just against Enishi Yukishiro.

* * *

Kenshin was already in a foul mood when he walked outside. His Physics teacher was enough to drive him crazy – for some reason he held an unbearable dislike for Kenshin, which wasn't something he was accustomed to before. Normally, teachers would be annoyed for the first few weeks of school, but then they would realize how charming and intelligent he was despite his lack of effort and grow to love him. 

Not with Mr. Niida.

He was surprisingly immune to Kenshin's charm. By calling him by his surname only (Kenshin wasn't really sure if Niida actually knew his first name) he distinguished him from the rest of the class as his person to torture.

Kenshin had thought that Niida would be absent for the rest of the week, but apparently he returned just to make him miserable.

He ran a hand through his red bangs and sighed, looking up to the parking lot where he was going to meet Sano, who was going to drop him off at home to pick up his electric and then go back to Sano's house to rehearse.

But while his eyes were roaming, he froze in complete disbelief.

Sozo was sitting on the hood of Kenshin's car with Kenshin's guitar in between his legs. He was staring back at his younger brother, apparently waiting for him to make his move.

Kenshin slightly shook his head to get his mind moving. When he was able to feel his arms and legs, he walked toward his older brother, unsure of how to feel at that moment. Sozo jumped off the hood with the guitar and walked down the mini grass hill and met Kenshin halfway.

If there was one thing the Himura brothers had in common was their expressive eyes. While Kenshin's were round and bright, Sozo's were slightly slanted and angled upwards, much like their father's eyes. His dark pupils appeared more profound when he kept his chin down and merely shifted his eyes upward to look at you. The way they flickered when he was excited, dulled when he was disheartened, blazed when angry, was every bit the same as Kenshin's, despite the difference in color.

Except the major difference with Sozo's eyes was the way they closed off on you, hiding any secret you ever wished to know while simultaneously opening up to you, at your disposal, indulging you with every emotion you never knew could be felt.

Kenshin was usually described as mysterious, but it was really his older brother Sozo who deserved that description. His dark bangs that hid one eye and his handsome looks made him dangerously mysterious. He was the type of boy a girl would bring home to worry her parents.

He handed Kenshin his guitar. "Didn't fuck around with it."

Kenshin closed his eyes, feeling the worn, hard case under his fingers made him feel better. But he was still angry for what he did.

"I should still kill you." Kenshin stated, opening his eyes to glare at him.

"It would be in your best interest not to because I hoped that we could kill dad together." Sozo replied calmly.

"Yeah, we'll do that, but first," he swung a fist back and punched Sozo in the jaw. Afterwards he cradled his fist in his other hand, muttering obscenities. "_Damn it!_"

Sozo got up from the ground and wiped away a trickle of blood from his chin. "I guess I deserved that."

"It wasn't even worth it! That hurt." Kenshin muttered, slowly stretching out his hand. "Actually…it kind of was…but I'm never doing it again."

"Good."

They stood in silence for a few moments. "You're being awfully civil." Kenshin said suspiciously. "Even when I just totally socked you in the face."

Sozo froze for a moment, as if he had just realized that he wasn't acting in character. He shook his head. "Believe it or not, you're actually not hated as much as dad right now." He said coolly.

Kenshin's nose twitched at the thought of him. "I hate…the whole idea of hating my dad. It's so overused in everything. It's stupid. But what he _did_…"

"Oh, and spurned love is any different?" Sozo sneered, having personally hated his family for a long time.

Kenshin's mouth opened a little and his eyes widened in realization. "You read my notebook, haven't you?" Sozo nodded with a "duh" expression on his face. Kenshin groaned before hiding his eyes behind his bangs. "_Great_. You are…honestly…the _last_ person I would want to have read it."

"Would you rather have Kaoru read it? Because I think she would've called a fucking therapist and put you on Prozac." Sozo stated bluntly.

Kenshin grumbled inaudibly and put his hands in his pockets. "I didn't want _anyone_ to read it."

Sozo stared at him for a moment. "Then why the hell didn't you carry it with you."

Kenshin let an annoyed sighed. "Because I didn't consider the option of having you search through the whole fucking school parking lot just to take my car."

"Well there's not use in moaning like a bitch about it. Or should I say, _sitting here just about to cry, my feelings shattered, my mind is clattered?_" He said in a mocking voice, repeating Kenshin's lyrics back to him.

Kenshin gave him the ugliest glare that he saved for extremely rare occasions. "Don't you mock me, Sozo. At least I express my feelings in a healthy manner unlike you, who acts like a freaking animal."

Sozo glared back at him. "That was _high school_. You don't know shit about me now."

"Why the fuck are you here, Sozo, be honest here. Why didn't you throw my guitar over a bridge, or sell it? Why did you _personally_ return my guitar to me? Tell me, because I'm really curious why you passed on an opportune moment to make me miserable." Kenshin demanded, stuffing his hands into his pockets so his shaking hands couldn't be seen.

Sozo looked down at the ground beneath him for the briefest of moments before looking back into Kenshin's with an intensity that Kenshin had trouble labeling. His older brother lifted his arm, hesitated for a moment, and then put his hand on Kenshin's shoulder. "We should talk."

"Yeah, we should." Kenshin found himself saying without thinking, a little more forcefully than he intended. This was his _older brother_, the person who completely ignored him for six years. Kenshin couldn't even remember a time when he had a civil conversation with him after the death of their mother. "But I have to rehearse with the guys – we have a show tomorrow. Later we will."

"You're actually performing tomorrow? Are you nuts?" Sozo asked incredulously.

Kenshin wasn't able to tell if Sozo was holding back anger, surprise, or a bit of both. "I didn't plan it. But…it's a good opportunity…and what kind of douchebag would I be if I took that away from the other guys?" He said softly, walking up the hill to his car with Sozo by his side.

"A normal human being who doesn't want to fucking _do_ anything on the anniversary of his mother's death." Sozo muttered.

Kenshin closed his eyes and breathed out loudly. "I don't need your fucking commentary you damn hypocrite." He gritted.

"I'm the hypocrite?" Sozo asked amusedly, except the smile didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Yeah, you tell me you don't want anyone judging you or making comments about what you do. Meanwhile you do that to every person."

Sozo barked a laugh. "That's rich, Kenshin, real rich. But you know what, I'm not gonna rock your world quite yet. I'll let you stay in your safe little bubble for now." He said with a knowing smirk.

Kenshin was about to say something when they heard someone shout, "_Kaoru!_"

Kenshin and Sozo both whipped their heads to see who yelled. It was Enishi, who was staring at the ground where Kaoru had apparently collapsed to her knees. And she was staring up at the two Himura brothers.

A smile grew on Kenshin's face as he gave a small wave to her. She was still staring at them blankly for a few moments before she gave a watery smile and waved back. Enishi looked up at the two boys and first shock came across his face briefly before replacing it with a glare. He helped Kaoru up and walked with her to her car, a hand on her shoulder.

"Who's the asshole?" Sozo asked as he got into the driver's seat.

"We can talk about him after rehearsal." Kenshin muttered before saying, "what are you doing? It's my car!"

"Yeah, but I'll need a ride home. I might as well drop you off and pick you up."

"We need to stop by the house first to pick up my other guitar." Kenshin grumbled as he walked over to the passenger seat, feeling that not driving his own car was something very wrong.

* * *

"Kenshin, who's driving your car?" Sano asked slowly, watching the Honda drive off at an alarmingly fast speed. 

"Sozo." Kenshin stated simply before leaving his dumbfounded friend on the entrance mat.

"Wait…_what?_ I need an explanation for this, Himura!" Sano exclaimed, turning back into the house quickly and slamming the door.

Kenshin sighed. "There's nothing _to_ explain. I don't know what's going on either. One moment he's there, the next I punch him, and the _next_ we're in the most awkward silence ever in my car." He ranted as he entered the basement with Sano trailing behind him.

"How could you be in an awkward silence with anyone?" Soujiro asked.

"With my brother, it's possible."

Soujiro paused for a moment before asking lightly, "he returned your guitar?" as he nodded to the acoustic in his hand.

"Yeah, along with my lyric book _which_ he read." Kenshin added in an angry voice.

Everyone stared at Kenshin in shock. "He actually _read_ it?"

"Nothing less from the sneaky bastard that's my brother."

There was another silence before Yahiko said, "that's so…I mean…you never even showed Kaoru that. Nobody has seen it."

Soujiro and Sano murmured in agreement. "So what's gonna happen?" Sano asked.

Kenshin sighed as he unzipped his electric out of its case and began tuning. "I have no clue. All I can do right now is roll with it…not think about it too deeply right now."

"Of course, your philosophy on life." Yahiko said as he took his seat behind his drum set.

Kenshin looked away and bit his bottom lip. He immediately started playing a complicated guitar solo that he couldn't even recognize – all he could focus on was moving his fingers in the correct formations on the frets. He didn't want to think about anything else – not about Sozo's unexpected visit, not about the anniversary the next day, and not about Kaoru, who was like a constant buzz in his mind that wouldn't go away no matter how loud he sang.

* * *

Before he knew it, he was back in another awkward silence with his brother. His knee bobbed up and down quickly as Sozo continued to speed home – apparently he hadn't lost his tendency to drive fifty miles per hour on a twenty-five miles per hour speed limit road. 

Neither spoke until they made it home and unconsciously walked to Kenshin's room. As Kenshin shut the door as quietly as he could, Sozo asked, "so when did you two break up?" as he took a seat in the swivel chair by the Mac in the corner of the room.

Kenshin sighed as he climbed onto his bed and sat cross-legged facing Sozo. "A little over a year ago."

"And I suppose that asshole from earlier is her new guy…"

"I hate him."

Sozo raised an eyebrow, vaguely looking like Kenshin for a brief moment. "That's a stupid reason to hate him. I mean, it's understandable _I guess_, but still, he didn't do anything to you."

Kenshin barked a mirthless laugh. "Yeah _right._ He treats me like shit."

"And you treat him like shit too."

Kenshin rubbed his face with his hands before murmuring in his hands, "well what do you expect – I'm the 'ex who can't let go' and Enishi is the controlling 'current boyfriend who hates the ex.'"

Sozo stayed quiet, thinking as he stared at the ground intently. After putting his right ankle on top of his left knee, he said, "well, she doesn't hate you."

"I know that."

"Did you _really_ see the way she was looking at us? For someone who wants nothing to do with you, she clearly wanted to come up and talk to us." Sozo continued, leaning in as he spoke, a spark in his eye.

The thought finally came to Kenshin that this wasn't normal – he shouldn't be having such a casual conversation with his brother. After everything that had happened, he felt like the air between them needed to be cleared before they could even begin to talk about his current problems involving Kaoru.

"You said earlier that you weren't going to 'rock my world' until after rehearsal." Kenshin finally said, stretching out his legs before staring at Sozo hard. "Well, throw it at me."

Sozo raised his one revealing eyebrow in what Kenshin thought to be astonishment before bringing his leg back down and leaning in so his elbows were resting on his knees. "Okay, little brother," he started in a condescending way, "this is how it is based on overhearing your conversations throughout the years and watching you today. No bullshit."

Kenshin was thrown off by how similar the two of them were before nodding. "That's the only way I roll."

Sozo waved a hand. "There you go. First thing, you say you don't tolerate bullshit. You want it straight up. The truth is…that's how you live. You constantly lie all the time, even to yourself! You _think_ you're living life to the fullest, but in reality, you're holding back more than any of the people in this town."

Kenshin snorted. "I don't _lie_ to myself. If anything, I'm only true to myself."

Sozo shook his head. "No. You're not. Look at you, Kenshin, it looks like you haven't eaten a proper meal in weeks, you're clearly conflicted."

"How about considering that _maybe_ I'm not hungry?"

This time Sozo snorted. "Please, if there's one thing we Himura males have in common is our appreciation for drinking alcohol and eating food."

Kenshin couldn't argue with that – he used to enjoy eating, but as of last year it became more of a necessity. As for alcohol – there was no room for argument – it was a known fact that the Himura's appreciated a good beer.

"I personally don't think I bullshit." Kenshin said calmly. "Teachers are always shocked by the fact that I openly don't care about class. I don't conform to that stupid façade."

Sozo rolled his eyes. "That's so immature. Pissing off your teachers doesn't have _anything_ to do with living life to the fullest."

"Oh okay Sozo, _wise one_, then how do you define it?"

"It's about holding nothing back – letting everyone see you just as you are. There's no two-faced involvement, which is _exactly_ what you do. Actually, I take that back, you're like a diamond – you have so many facets, a different one for each person."

Kenshin bit his bottom lip hard. When he thought about it, he realized it was true. "Everyone does that." He said softly.

"Yeah, but you are just so damn _obvious_."

"And how do you know this? You've barely been with me for an hour." Kenshin snapped.

"Observance. The way you looked at Kaoru back there…that look just held so much inner…I don't know what. You've got a lot of problems with her. It's obvious that you're confused on how to react and deal with her. The fact that you have such strong feelings for her makes it worse."

_Bull's eye_, Kenshin thought grudgingly but didn't say anything out loud. "Okay Dr. Phil, I think –"

"Oh, don't forget your _friends_. You seem loose and free around them, but you're not. It's like your tense just under the surface – you don't let them in, it's like you have this invisible wall around you." Sozo paused for a moment to think and to let Kenshin soak everything in. "They don't know you still carry a torch for her." Sozo said in realization before smirking in a knowing way.

"Get that damn smile off your face." Kenshin hissed, getting angry at the fact that Sozo was reading him like an open book, even though he spent a long time protecting his thoughts and soul with various barriers. "They know I still like her."

"They just don't know you love her."

Every muscle in Kenshin's body froze at that word. Love. "I-I don't know about –"

"Are you joking? You've even tricked yourself into believing it's not love? Ken, if those lyrics say anything about you, they say how much you're whipped."

Kenshin tried to swallow through his suddenly dry throat. "Stop it, Sozo."

"Oh, I'm getting to you, aren't I? Well good, because you need to get over being an emotionless prick."

Anger flared in Kenshin's stomach. "_What?_ I'm anything _but_ emotionless!"

Sozo snorted. "Your behavior at mom's funeral said otherwise." He said in disgust.

Kenshin's hands shook by his sides at the thought of their mother's funeral. So they were getting to the heart of the matter. "You don't know _shit_ about what happened that day."

"Oh, I know perfectly well. How the _fuck_ did you not cry? _That's_ what I've been wondering for the past six years." Kenshin swallowed and looked down at his shaking hands. Sozo noticed and asked, "when the hell did you ever have tremors?"

"It actually…links back to why I didn't cry. Um…it was at the funeral. I'm surprised you didn't notice."

Sozo shook his head. "What do you think, Ken? I was too busy feeling pissed off about this fucked up world and feeling upset about the fact that I lost my mom. I wasn't really thinking about anyone else."

Kenshin let out a breath. "It was grandma."

Sozo narrowed his eyes. "Mom's mom? That bitch, I fucking hate her." He spat.

"Yeah, I do too. She…kicked me when I was just beginning to cry. She grabbed my collar and forced me to stand, saying that…that I have to act like a man and to stop crying." Kenshin let out a laugh before biting his lip. "I was _eleven_ for Christ's sake. I just lost my mom, what the hell did she expect?" He whispered, shaking his head slightly.

Sozo stared at him with wide eyes. The silence in the room stifling.

Kenshin realized that this was a point of no return – there was no way that the two could go back to their previous way of dealing with each other, now that the truth was unfolding at an unstoppable rate.

He hoped Sozo was ready because Kenshin found that he actually was…that he had been ready for almost six years.

* * *

"What's wrong? You've been out of it all day." Enishi asked, looking at Kaoru intently. 

She let out a sigh and put down her pencil. "I don't know. I feel like my mom is being overbearing about her and dad going on vacation for their anniversary…but then Kenshin –"

"Of course, he loves messing with people's minds." He muttered to himself. "Continue." He said.

She ignored the jibe – she had to agree with him on that point. "Well, he just gave a gentle reminder that she's only bothering me because she loves me, which I know is true."

Enishi had an unreadable expression on his face. She knew it was because of the fact that he really disliked Kenshin, but understood to some extent why he acted the way he did.

"What is your mom worried about?"

She blushed. "Erm…she's worried about…us…doing…you know…" She mumbled.

His eyes widened a little before turning a little pink himself. "Oh…well…" He stuttered.

She smiled. "You're so cute. Of course I told her that you would _never_ try anything without my permission, but," she sighed, "I don't know."

"Well, your mom has every right to worry, so I wouldn't be too mean to her. What Himura was trying to hint at is that you've only got one mom…and you're lucky that yours is alive." Kaoru swallowed and nodded, her throat suddenly constricted. "So, what are we going to do for vacation?" He asked with a smile that immediately made her relax.

"Well…we can do a lot! We can drive to that boardwalk in Weston and chill there. Of course I have to visit my grandma at least once…" She rambled before looking into his light eyes. "And of course just spend some quality time with you."

"You're making me feel like a grandpa when you say that." He laughed.

"You know what I mean." She said, laughing as well.

"Actually…before you mentioned you mom saying _that_…I was actually going to…well…ask you if…you wanted to maybe _try_ it." He said in a slow voice, turning red as he looked her straight in the eye.

She swallowed loudly at the sincere look on his face. Going on impulse, she leaned in and kissed him fully on the lips, finding his behavior too cute for words.

He smiled on her lips and pulled away. "What's that for?"

"Because you're just the most amazing guy." She said simply before kissing him again.

All of a sudden, she had a flashback to the summer before freshmen year when she said those exact words to a certain redhead.

The conversation ended the exact same way.

"What's up?" He asked, sensing her sudden tensing.

"Oh, nothing, I just remembered that I still have to do this French oral tomorrow." She lied as she pulled away.

"Ah, I suck at orals." He said with sympathy. "Good luck with that."

"Thanks." She looked down at her hands before looking back at him. "So…um…you want to…during break…" She trailed off, looking at him expectantly.

"Only if you're ready." He said quickly, putting a hand over hers. "I just thought that since we've been going out for a year and…well…we do love each other and…I think our first times should be with each other. What I'm basically trying to say is that…I want _you_ to be my first…which is kind of weird for a guy to say…but I mean it." He said with conviction, but still had the remnants of his previous blushing attack on his face.

She smiled at him, squeezing his hand. "Yeah…we can try…" She said.

He smiled at her before leaning in and giving her a quick peck on the lips.

She sighed and smiled before focusing back on her homework.

_It will turn out better than last time_, she thought to herself as she mechanically copied a graph from her calculator to graph paper. After all, she was a year older, meaning that she was a lot more mature than the last time. There wouldn't be any last minute fears and certainly no awkward post-conversations.

She played with the necklace Enishi gave her in a nervous manner, not quite feeling as innocent as he believed her to be. She never told him what almost happened before they went out.

_We were pretty close to –_

She stopped herself from continuing that thought. There was no way she was going to think about his calloused fingertips and caring violet eyes from that day while her current boyfriend was sitting across from her.

It wasn't right.

* * *

A/N: I hope you enjoyed chapter three (haha I just realized that this will be the only time the day count will match the actual chapter number...) and please drop a little review for me :)

MissGoalie


	4. Countdown to Vacation: 2

A/N: Sorry this chapter came out late – there were a lot of things delaying it which included the GIANTS WINNING THE SUPERBOWL!!! Sorry all you Pat fans – I still love you anyway :)

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Countdown to Vacation: 2

It was the usual dream the night before the anniversary of his mother's death – constantly reliving the moment she collapsed in the kitchen. Over and over in Kenshin's mind, except he wasn't the eleven-year-old that witnessed it in reality – in the dream he was his current age. What made it worse was that he was never able to do anything to help her, to prevent it from happening. He would continue to stare at the floor in shock, his crackers and glass of water in front of him.

What finally made him wake up from his uneasy sleep was Sozo shaking his shoulders.

Kenshin's bangs stuck to his forehead due to a thin film of sweat. He breathed heavily as he looked into Sozo's worried gaze. He groaned. "Did I…_moan_ or anything embarrassing?"

Sozo rolled off Kenshin and gave him a small smile. "I wouldn't call it _moaning_, per se. I don't really know what it was…but it didn't sound very good." Kenshin let out a breath and looked toward the alarm clock by his bed that read four o'clock in the morning. "Well…you probably won't have that nightmare about mom again. I'm gonna go crash, later." With that, Sozo stood up and walked out of Kenshin's room, quietly closing the door behind him.

Kenshin sighed once more and screwed his eyes shut.

Six years to the day.

Six years he had learned to endure living without her…and it honestly wasn't any easier comparing then and the present.

He wiped his forehead dry and took calming breaths, continually staring at the shifting shadows on his ceiling. There was no way he was going to fall back asleep – too many old memories and raw feelings were washing over him. In defeat, he threw the covers off him and walked out of his room and into the kitchen.

To his immense surprise, Sozo was already sitting in the kitchen, in the dark no less. A large cup of what Kenshin assumed to be coffee was cradled in his hands. Sozo looked so beyond the world that Kenshin wanted to do anything but disturb him. But, Sozo heard Kenshin before he made it halfway down the stairs and looked up at his little brother.

They didn't say a word to each other as Kenshin opened a cabinet and grabbed a mug, filling it with coffee. He joined Sozo on the opposite side of the table, looking down at the smoking substance and thought.

Both didn't realize how long they continued to sit and drink their coffee in silence until their father stomped down the stairs and froze in the entranceway to the kitchen.

Kenshin was the first to give Hiko an ugly glare. Sozo quickly followed suit, which shocked Hiko even further.

"I don't think I've seen you two in the same room in years." Hiko murmured as he finally walked in, repeating the same process that Kenshin did earlier. The tension in the room was driving Kenshin insane. He wasn't used to this kind of tension – he wanted to get rid of it. He wanted to somehow talk about what happened with his father. But he then remembered that _woman_ on the phone and his thoughts reverted back to how much he hated him. "You two look a lot alike, you know. Your glares are just as piercing." Hiko admitted softly, looking down at his mug.

"Why?" Sozo asked in a disgusted way.

They saw him swallow and look down at the wooden floor. "I…can't defend myself. But…I hope you two can understand the pain of losing the one you love and…" he trailed off.

But in one blinding moment, Kenshin _did _understand.

It was the exact same reason why he hooked up with Yumi: to maybe forget for just one moment, to forget that horrible stabbing pain in his chest whenever he saw her smiling at Enishi. Because in the throws of it all, for maybe a second, you actually believe that the person you'd rather be holding was actually in your hands.

That was why he walked up to his father and hugged him tightly, like the way he used to when he was a boy.

"It hurts, dad, it hurts." He whispered into his chest, balling the fabric of his shirt into his hands.

Hiko reciprocated the hug fully, holding his son tightly. "I wish you didn't know." He murmured.

Kenshin wished he could cry at that moment, but knew he wouldn't.

* * *

Sozo watched father and son hug with a mixture of feelings.

First, he was angry. He though the purpose of the Himura brothers unifying was to completely go against their father. After all, he had _sex_ with another _woman_. It was unforgivable.

As childish as it sounded, he thought his father would never consider having another relationship.

But seeing his broken family still somehow trying to reach each other, despite losing the glue that held them together, moved him. It showed that blood was truly thicker than anything.

Although he didn't forgive his father for everything he did subsequent to his mother's death, he could forgive him for trying to block out the unbearable pain that still lived inside the heart. He and Kenshin had been guilty of it since the beginning.

When they finally pulled away, Kenshin turned to look at Sozo and gave him a small shrug, as if to apologize. Their plan to pester their father was not longer necessary. Sozo shrugged in return, silently saying that it was okay.

Their mother would've preferred it this way.

Hiko looked at Sozo with unreadable eyes. Sozo stared back at him, knowing that Hiko was going to be the first to look away. The other person was always the first to look away.

He was right – Hiko looked down at his mug to avoid Sozo's intense scrutinizing.

"Are you going to work?" Sozo asked Hiko coolly.

"No, I never do today. I'm…going to try and get a few papers done…visit Shina's grave…and…I don't know…see how the day goes." Hiko answered. He turned his attention toward Kenshin, who had crossed his arms across his chest, goosebumps all over his arms and legs from the cold. "What are you doing?" Hiko asked, knowing that Kenshin would skip school.

"Um…" Kenshin shifted from the balls of his feet to the heels a few times. "I think…Sozo and I are going to go to the diner…visit mom's grave…and then I'm performing in Lyme tonight with the band." He answered slowly, looking toward Sozo, as if asking for permission.

Sozo nodded, a rare smile tugging on his lips. "Yeah, that's the plan."

Hiko looked between the two brothers and smiled a little. "Great. So…don't come home too late I suppose."

"That rule is for Kenshin." Sozo said, the smile transforming into a smirk that was identical to Hiko's.

"Fuck you." Kenshin said with an amused smile on his face.

Hiko shook his head and left the kitchen, leaving Kenshin and Sozo in their moment, their first happy moment as brothers in six years.

* * *

"I hope Kenshin's okay," was the first coherent sentence that came out of Kaoru's mouth that morning.

Her mother nodded sympathetically. "Yeah…those poor boys." She shook her head sadly. "We all miss her dearly."

Kaoru put her face into her hand and tried to breathe steadily. "Why her? Every year I have to ask it, _why?_" She said in a broken voice before letting her hand fall to the table and looking up to the ceiling, not wanting any tears to fall.

Tears were shining in her mother's eyes. "The only answer that I could possibly give is that…God wanted her, which isn't very satisfying, but that's what my upbringing taught me, and it satisfies me to an extent."

"It doesn't satisfy me." Kaoru muttered as she put on her jacket and grabbed her car keys.

"Are you going to be okay? You seem…worse this year…" Her mother asked concernedly.

"Yeah, I'll be okay. I just need to get to school and all will be well." Kaoru said, giving her mother a fake smile that would've worked on everyone except two people: her mother and Kenshin.

Her mother sighed and nodded. "Fine, I'll let you go. If you get too upset, just come home, okay?" She knew her daughter would never take advantage of that like most children would – Kaoru would rather go to school ill than miss it at all.

"Thanks, but I think I'll be able to make it. I'll see you later, love you." Kaoru said before walking out the front door.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, wanting to clear her mind. This day was bad enough as it was, and all she wanted to do was go through it like a normal school day, knowing that Shina Himura would've wanted it to be that way.

As she drove to school, she thought back to when she and Kenshin were about eight years old. They were playing "house" in her backyard where she used to have a plastic one room house from Toys 'R' Us while their mothers were sitting on the patio drinking lemonade.

She remembered Shina stating, "they are so adorable together. I hope those two stay close for a long, long time."

A few tears fell down her face.

* * *

This time Kenshin drove his car with Sozo in the passenger seat. They were on their way to the Glenwood Diner, which was only two minutes away from the house. The silence during the ride wasn't nearly as awkward as the day before – it was comfortable, as if no words were needed.

The parking lot was nearly empty when Kenshin pulled into a spot right by the entrance.

"You're kind of crooked." Sozo stated as he got out of the car.

Kenshin rolled his eyes as he locked the car. "You know what, you better shut the hell up about my driving and parking abilities because I haven't demanded you to pay for gas yet." He said, shaking his index finger at Sozo.

"What?" Sozo asked amusedly.

"I should make you pay for the next time I go to get gas."

"No way, brah. It's your car."

"You stole it!"

"Yeah, because I needed a car."

Kenshins stopped walking and stood in front of him. "Then you're going to pay for everything we do today. That includes the meal and other shit."

Sozo let out a loud sigh. "_Fine_, I'll buy your freaking meal and other shit."

"Great! I'm gonna order everything on the left side of the menu!" Kenshin said cheerfully as he walked into the diner, leaving his brother to stand frozen in front of the door.

"Wait there's a _limit_, Kenshin!" Sozo exclaimed as he followed his brother in. "Gas doesn't cost _that_ much…"

"Dude, it's like, forty bucks to fill. You're paying at least that much."

"_At least?_"

"I had to _walk home in the rain_."

"Yeah, but Kaoru picked you up halfway anyway."

Kenshin snorted. "Yeah, and like that was a plus – Enishi was in the car too." He said sarcastically.

"Oh, right, the asshole."

"Uh, two, thanks." Kenshin said to the elderly waitress at the cash register. She raised her eyebrows at them before taking two menus and walking to the corner of the diner. Plopping the two menus on the table, she left them without another word.

"Ice bitch." Sozo muttered.

"She probably thought we were cutting school."

"Uh, yeah, about that, I'm not _cutting_ school. I'm on _vacation_. _You_, on the other hand, _are_ cutting school."

"Ass."

Sozo grinned as he and Kenshin sat down in their respective chairs. They sat there for a few moments until Sozo said, "this is highly uncomfortable. Let's move to the booth."

"Good call." Kenshin said before taking the two menus and switching to the booth next to them. "Ice Bitch is gonna get so pissed."

"Eh, whatever, there are worse things to deal with." Sozo said as he sat down.

"Right." Kenshin muttered as he opened the menu. "You wanna split a stack of pancakes or something?"

"Sure. Plain." Sozo said lightly.

"Eh, I was actually thinking chocolate chip."

"No way."

"Why? Because mom used to make them all the time?"

"Exactly." Sozo stated flatly.

"The diner doesn't make them half bad." Kenshin tried but Sozo wouldn't yield his hard stare. "Okay, fine. Plain."

"How can you eat chocolate chip pancakes after she died?" Sozo asked as he shook his head in disbelief.

"Kaoru helped me out in that department. Her mom makes really good pancakes too." Kenshin answered with a sad smile.

Sozo took a deep breath, as if preparing to say something. However, "Ice Bitch" as they called her came back to the table with her pad in hand, pen poised.

"Have you decided?" She asked in an obnoxious tone.

"Yeah, can we just have one big stack of plain pancakes? Butter on top." Sozo said.

"No, on the side." Kenshin said, changing the order.

"What the hell? Don't you like it when it has already melted?"

"I personally don't like butter on my pancakes."

"Well which is it?" The lady asked impatiently.

"No need to get snotty…_Sakura_." Sozo said, squinting his eyes to read the nametag.

"Well, butter on the side or not?" She asked exasperatedly.

"On it, I'll be paying, so I decide where the butter goes." Sozo said cheerfully, plucking the menu from Kenshin's hands and handing it to the waitress. Sakura the waitress gave Kenshin and Sozo pointed looks before leaving them alone. "I'm a _college student_." Sozo said slowly before sighing. "Curse of the Himura genes. We're so good looking, yet we tend to look young for our ages."

Kenshin grinned. "True."

"I mean, really. Dad is almost _fifty_. Look at him! He's like…he looks like he's in his early thirties. Gets me excited for the future." Sozo continued. Kenshin couldn't quite share Sozo's enthusiasm. Thinking beyond high school was enough to make him lose sleep, let alone almost thirty years into the future. Sozo's sharp eyes caught Kenshin's unsure face. "Not sure about the future, Ken?"

Kenshin sighed. "Not quite."

"Nobody really should be…but it's something to look forward to, you know?"

"After what life already threw at me…us…I don't know if it is worth getting excited for." Kenshin admitted as he gently shifted the fork so it aligned with the knife on his napkin. "The two things I was so sure about…ended up…fucking up I guess."

"Mom and Kaoru." Sozo finished for Kenshin. "I don't get it. You two were just…I mean…I joked with my friends before mom died. Like when Benjiro and Maro used to come over and we'd see you two doing whatever…we'd just joke about how you were going to have babies with red hair and blue eyes…or black hair with purple eyes. All these shorties just running around." Sozo continued with a wistful expression on his face.

A fleeting smile graced Kenshin's face. "A lot of people said stuff like that."

"Why? How did two…_perfect_ people just…lose each other?" Sozo asked, leaning into the table and staring at Kenshin with his intense dark eyes that made his little brother want to admit everything.

"Look, all I know is that…she saw herself in a different place. She couldn't see herself with me, a _starving artist_. I'm not even eighteen and already I'm being called that." Kenshin answered, looking away from his gaze.

Sozo shook his head. "No, I think it's that she _did_ see that in her future, too well in fact that she got fucking _scared_. You wanna know something about people? People don't want to know their future, not really. Everyone is such a fucking fake – nobody wants to know shit about their future because then it would seem like it's written in stone. And it's not – it can change so fast that you wouldn't know what the hell happened. We know this too goddamn well."

"More like her friends got in the way. I know they did – somehow they convinced her to dump me. We were _so_…chill. Happy."

"Then she's a fucking moron."

Kenshin sighed loudly. "Can you stop saying _fuck_ every _five_ seconds? I swear to God all I've been saying when I'm with you is _fuck_."

"Sorry, bad habit. Drives dad fu-really nuts, you know? Besides, all my buds say it at school."

Kenshin snorted. "They must be eloquent people."

"Shut up, I don't need you judging me when everyone else in this fucking town judges. That's what pissed me off the most about living here – _especially_ in high school." Sozo said sharply.

"There are _children_ here." Sakura the waitress cut in with a sharp voice of her own as she plopped two plates, one in front of each Himura and another plate with eight pancakes rested between the two. "Enjoy."

As soon as Sakura the waitress was out of hearing distance, Kenshin leaned in and hissed, "well you know what? You fucking _deal_. You have _no fucking idea_ what it was like for me after she died. Everyone was too worried about _you_ and your fuck ups. Nobody saw me breaking down. Nobody saw me having a fucking problem, and now I'm the most _fucked up_ out of the three of us!" His hands were shaking uncontrollably under the table.

Sozo opened his mouth, and then closed it, unsure of what to say. He shifted uncomfortably, looking down at the ground awkwardly. "Yeah…um…_Jesus_…just thinking about what I did as a kid…" He shook his head before covering his eyes with his hand.

"You feel like a fu –"

"Let's not swear anymore. I don't like you swearing." Sozo interrupted Kenshin, preventing him from finishing his sentence.

Kenshin swallowed and nodded. "You feel like an idiot." He finished.

"Pretty much. It was all so juvenile. The rebelling, the pot…it didn't _do_ anything. All it did was make me look like a major fuck up…sorry…I couldn't think of another description for it. They played the whole 'we offered you counseling and you didn't embrace it, blah blah' and all that other bullsh – bull crap. They did _nothing_, they did _absolutely nothing_. Morons. Didn't know _squat _what was going on."

"I didn't get anything."

"What?" Sozo's dark eyes grew wide with astonishment.

Kenshin shook his head and looked out the window for a moment. "I don't know…they just compared my behavior to yours and they assumed I was taking it quite nicely." He snorted, rolling his eyes. "Guess they didn't look closer and see that my hands shook whenever I repress stuff like that."

Sozo visibly swallowed and looked down at his own hands. After a few minutes of silence he looked up at Kenshin with fierce determination. "I'm going to help you."

"What?" Kenshin asked with astonishment.

"It's partially my fault that you're messed up. To fix that…I'm going to make you release your emotions."

"My emotions?"

"Yeah. Everything that annoys you, saddens you, just let it out. Like that bitch waitress. If she gives us another funny look, just bitch her out."

Kenshin raised an eyebrow at Sozo. "Are you serious?"

"Kenshin, for six years you have been bottling your emotions. It's not healthy." Sozo said in a reasonable tone as he picked up his fork and knife to take two pancakes and place them on his plate. "Damn it, she didn't give us syrup." He waved his hand to catch her attention. They both noticed her whisper to another waiter before coming over to them.

"Yes?"

"Do you need to cop an attitude? Honestly, we're giving you business here. All you're doing is lowering your chances of getting a good tip." Sozo said with a raised eyebrow identical to Kenshin's before sighing. "Syrup, would be nice, thanks."

Sakura the waitress huffed before turning on her heel and walking away.

"God Sozo, you're a pisser." Kenshin said amusedly as he forked a pancake and plopped it onto his plate.

"Hey, I'm a no-bullshit guy. That's probably why I rarely get any girls." Sozo said honestly.

"Oh, please, you hook up."

"Yeah, but nothing really _serious_. It's kind of sad, actually. How people need to be coddled."

"Well you need a filter. Some things just can't be said out loud."

Sozo raised an eyebrow at him. "Really."

"Yeah. I tried that no-bullshit thing with Kaoru. I told her…a lot. How I think about her relationship with Enishi and her friends. But then…I kind of realized that it wasn't my place. I had no right to say that stuff to her just because I wasn't moving on." He sighed before shaking his head. "She's moved on, why can't I?"

"Well, it doesn't help that you've never _really_ tried to get over her."

Kenshin sighed. "Yeah, but then I think, what's the point? I know what we had was…incredible. It really was. We just…we were everything to each other. I was her first for a lot of things, she was my first…she told me things and…we had fun. And frankly, I know that I could never have that with any other person."

Sozo let out a breath of air. "Wow, you are so _in_ it." He said with a sad smile.

"I don't know about _that_…but…I've never felt that close to anyone after the end of it." Kenshin said in a tone that signaled the end of the conversation.

Sozo looked down at his half eaten pancakes before saying abruptly, "I think we should get the check." He waved his hand to get the waitress's attention.

She came back and raised her eyebrows at them. "What now?"

Kenshin looked at Sozo and then looked up at the waitress. "Okay, first of all, _yes_, I go to high school. _Yes_, I'm skipping school. Do you want to know why? Because today is the anniversary of my mother's death and frankly, I don't want to sit in classrooms and learn for over seven hours. Can you understand that? So don't say another word, got it?" Kenshin admitted, glaring at the woman.

She took a step back, her eyes widening in shock. She said nothing and scurried away, not once looking back.

Sozo raised an eyebrow at him, clearly impressed. "You're a fast learner."

Kenshin smirked, actually feeling better from the confrontation. "I'm not in two A.P. classes and three honors classes for nothing."

* * *

Enishi had just leaned in to greet Kaoru with a kiss to her cheek in gym class, but she tilted her head away to avoid his touch. "What's up?" Enishi asked after Kaoru cringed away from his lips.

She sighed. "Today's the anniversary of Kenshin's mom's death." She murmured.

Enishi pursed his lips before sighing. This week Kaoru had been talking, and clearly thinking about Kenshin a lot more than Enishi was comfortable with. "He's a big boy, as unbelievable as it seems, he is, and I don't think you have to worry about him." Enishi said lightly.

"I'm not talking about him, I'm talking about _me_. I know that he'll somehow get through it like every other year, I just don't know if _I_ will. When she died…I was just so…_devastated_. My mom too. It was really hard for everyone." Kaoru said.

Enishi nodded. "Okay…well…if you need anything today…you can call me. I'm here for you, you know."

Kaoru nodded. "I know…thanks."

At the end of the day, she was so emotionally and physically drained that she couldn't bear the thought of sitting for a meeting with the school PTA. With that in mind, she called Tomoe to tell her she didn't feel well and wanted to skip the meeting.

"_What do you mean you're _skipping_ the meeting?"_

Kaoru sighed as she put her head in her hand. "Tomoe…I can't go. I don't think I can handle sitting there for another two hours."

"_Kaoru, I don't think you quite understand. You're future as president is partially riding on your performance here."_

Kaoru bit her lip, conflicted. But Shina Himura's smiling face came to mind and she felt so guilty about possibly considering not honoring her in some way. "A close family friend died today. I mean, it's the anniversary of…_it_. And I really want to visit her grave." She admitted, purposefully keeping out the identity of the family friend.

"_Oh, Kaoru, I'm _so_ sorry, I had _no_ idea. You go ahead and skip it. That's really sad, I'm so sorry. _God! _I'm such a bitch!"_

"No, Tomoe, it's okay. Just cover for me. I'll see you tomorrow, I'll be better then."

"_No problem, anything for you. Toodles!"_

Tomoe hung up. Kaoru kept her cell phone to her ear for another few seconds before closing it and starting her car – she was going to Pleasant View Cemetery.

* * *

Shina Himura wanted to be buried in Pleasant View Cemetery for one reason only: it sounded similar to _Pleasantville_, one of her favorite movies.

Kenshin and Sozo were glad of this choice – it was a very small cemetery and there were rarely any people in it. However, the downside was that the graves weren't kept well, which was why they both got down on their knees and cleaned their mother's grave of weeds and dirt before placing a bouquet of newly bought lilies before the grave.

They stood up to "admire" their work.

"Stupid fucks – they should be doing this. What the hell do they do in a graveyard anyway?" Sozo grumbled.

"Can we refrain from swearing in front of her grave? She never liked cursing. Remember when you first said 'shit?'"

Sozo lightly smiled. "Yeah, she got so mad. She said that was how it starts – once you use a bad word, you constantly use it and can never stop. It's sad, really. I've cursed so much in life ever since her death. I mean, in school I cursed all the time when I was thirteen and stuff. But at home I managed to tone it down, you know? But when she died," he shrugged, "I didn't see the point in preventing myself."

Kenshin nodded with understanding. He took a shaky breath as he read the contents of the gravestone:

_Shina Himura (1959 - 2001)_

_A loving daughter, sister, wife and mother._

"_Vice, Virtue. It's best not to be too moral. You cheat yourself out of too much life. Aim above morality. If you apply that to life, then you're bound to live life fully."_

"I don't know if I love that quote or hate it." Kenshin said suddenly. "I mean, it's in one of my favorite movies…and it's really powerful and stuff. All I know is that it's burned itself in the back of mind permanently." He looked up to the slightly cloudy sky, seeing a lone bird fly over him.

"My favorite part about it is that…it's about life in general. In a graveyard, that's hard to come by." Sozo said. "But that was how mom was. She was a free soul, walked to the beat of her own drum."

Kenshin suddenly smiled. "You know near the end of _Harold and Maude_ how 'Trouble' starts playing? It's playing in my head right now." He shook his head.

Sozo let out a breath. "_Wow_. I haven't seen that movie in _years_. In fact, I haven't seen it in six years, I couldn't bear to."

"Really? That movie was like…that was one of the few things that got me through it. I know that movie like the back of my hand…and I _still_ laugh and choke up at the same scenes."

"_Choke up?_ Okay, what is 'choking up' for you? Something that makes you go 'aw?' And which scene? At the end when Maude –"

"When I say 'choke up' I mean…my throat just closes up. I can't speak. _Sometimes_ my eyes get watery. But…yeah, the last line tugs a heart string. But…I don't know, you know when Maude is talking with Harold about the field of flowers and how people let themselves be treated as just a mass instead of individuals? That part just gets to me."

"I love that part." Sozo whispered.

Kenshin's hands began to shake in his pockets. At that moment he wanted to go back in the car to play his guitar, something to numb the pain. He had just turned around when Sozo asked, "where are you going?"

"To get my," Kenshin pointed to the car to end his sentence. Sozo walked over and grabbed his arm tightly. "What are you doing?"

"No, you're not getting your guitar, you're not going to play it. It's time to stop blocking out the pain, Kenshin. Let it _really_ get to you. You have to let it out! No more of this…guitar being your crutch." Sozo said sternly.

Kenshin bit his lip hard. "Please," he whispered, his nose beginning to sting, which wasn't a good sign.

"No. Stay here with me. Just the three of us – you, me, and mom, okay?"

Kenshin's breath hitched in his throat. "Don't say that. Let me go, Sozo."

Sozo's eyes suddenly strayed from Kenshin's face to the entrance gate to the cemetery. Kenshin craned his head to see who he was staring at before freezing. Sozo's grip on Kenshin's arm tightened.

Kenshin suddenly turned around to find Kaoru standing frozen a few meters away, a single lily held limply by her side. She was walking toward Shina's grave when she froze on the spot, clearly not expecting both the Himura brothers to be there.

Kenshin tried to smile at her, but his throat was still clogged.

"You can stay, Kamiya." Sozo said for Kenshin, seeing how he was having difficulty speaking.

Kaoru looked conflicted for a few moments before she slowly made her way toward them. She placed the lily beside the bouquet and took a step back, falling between the two brothers.

"Uh…sorry that I drunk-called you last year." Sozo added with a hint of sheepishness.

Kaoru gave him a fleeting smile. "It's okay. It was quite entertaining."

The three stayed silent, staring at the grave in front of them. But Kenshin was only able to take the silence for so long. His hands began to shake, wanting to play his guitar badly. He began humming "Trouble" by Cat Stevens.

"_Oh trouble can't you see, you're eating my heart away, and there's nothing much left of me_…" Kenshin murmured.

"Kenshin, stop. You're butchering a good song." Sozo said tersely.

"Liar – everything he sings is perfect, and you know it." Kaoru said quietly.

Sozo pursed his lips and said nothing else. But he looked over when he heard a muffled choking sound. "Kenshin…you're crying…" He said in an awestruck voice.

Kenshin brought a shaky hand to his face to find it wet. He felt the substance between his fingers before closing his eyes to feel each individual tear roll down his cheeks.

Kenshin wiped his face. "It won't stop."

"You've been holding back six years worth of crying, you need to release it. Now that we've got that barrier down, you need to really _cry_."

Kenshin sputtered. "What do you think _this_ is?"

"No, I mean, body-racking _sobs_. It'll make you feel better."

Kaoru's eyes grew wide. "Ken…" She tried, turning her body toward him.

"I'm fine, it's nothing, really, my tear ducts are just freaking out." He said, pointing to his eyes, trying to smile at her.

Tears of her own filled her eyes as she wrapped her arms tightly around his thin waist. "Kenshin…"

He bit his bottom lip hard, trying to push back the sobs. But after a few seconds, he was unsuccessful. He nestled his face into the crook of her neck and held her close to him, silently letting sobs rack his lithe form. She smelled of jasmine – she still wore the same, intoxicating perfume.

"I miss her _so_ _much_." Kenshin cried into her shoulder.

Tears fell down Kaoru's face. "I know, I know, I do too." She choked, pulling him so close so there was absolutely no space between them.

They continued to cry and hold each other, as if their friendship was never cut off, as if they still openly called each other "my other half."

* * *

Yahiko's uncle used to be a hippie, which was why he owned a gray-blue 1973 Volkswagen Transporter Van. It was their transportation to and from gigs because it was capable of holding all their instruments and themselves without cramping.

However, being in the van for a long period of time was still just as uncomfortable, especially when there was one extra person in it.

Kenshin, Sano, Soujiro, Yahiko, and Sozo being the new addition, had been stuck in traffic on the way to the club they were playing in. Not only was it a four-way collision, one of the cars belonged to the band Get A Life, who was supposed to be playing before them.

But right before Kenshin was going to tell Shinji, the manager, when the gang entered, Shinji immediately said shortly, "you guys are _late_," as he ushered Yahiko and Sano to the stage to set up.

"Traffic on the highway – four car collision. One of the cars was Get A Life – so I doubt they'll be playing."

Shinji's eyes widened. "Oh shit! Excuse me, gotta make some calls." With that he sprinted away.

Sozo looked at where all the people were sitting and standing. "I have to mingle?"

"Yeah, sorry. Band members only." Kenshin said in a teasing voice.

Sozo grinned. "Fine. Good luck brah," his eyes then strayed to the people by the bar, one girl in particular.

Kenshin chuckled. "Thanks, bye. You have to tell me about her."

"Will do." With that Sozo casually walked over to the bar. Kenshin watched the girl turn and her eyes widen at the sight of him. She didn't stand a chance.

Kenshin chuckled as he jumped onto the stage, unzipping his guitar case before stuffing it behind the curtains. He began tuning while Yahiko was trying to fix something on his drums on his knees. One tech man walked across the stage and almost stepped on him because he was so small cramped into a ball.

Yahiko groaned as he stood up. "How degrading. Whatever happened to that guy who said, 'size doesn't matter'?"

Kenshin shrugged and took a swig from a water bottle that was beside an amp. "Must've gotten stepped on, or something."

Sano laughed from behind the curtain. He came onto the stage, tuning his base as he said, "right, because in this world of competition, the big dominate the small. You are weak compared to _moi_."

"Shut up, rooster."

"Are you guys almost ready? We're already behind by twenty minutes!" Shinji hissed from behind the curtain.

"And whose fault is that? I think you should call Get A Life and tell them to watch their driving." Kenshin said coolly.

"Yeah, we're done, you can plug in everything." Soujiro said kindly before shooting Kenshin a warning look. "This was very generous of him to give us this spot – don't push it Ken."

"Oh, don't mind him, he's just upset that Kaoru wouldn't come tonight." Sano said dismissively.

Kenshin shot him a glare. "I _said_ she didn't have to."

"I can't believe you guys actually…_hugged_. She avoids contact with you like you're the plague. How did that happen? Did you make a move? Slip a hand somewhere?" Sano asked suggestively.

Kenshin stared at him blankly. "Somebody who makes moves on someone in a graveyard has to have some serious mental problems, _which I do not have!_"

"Okay, chill, just asking."

Kenshin actually didn't blame him for wondering – he did leave out the part of him completely breaking down

"_Alright, ladies and gents._ This is First Absolute!" Shinji announced before leaving the stage.

Kenshin put his guitar strap over his shoulders before adjusting the microphone. He then said, "hey, uh, we're First Absolute, and, well, enjoy…hopefully…"

He got a bit of chuckling from the audience, which was always good. Turning to Yahiko, he nodded to him, letting him count off.

The band immediately started with a song that full of energy and hype, to get the audience warmed up. Kenshin found Sozo with the girl he spotted at the bar. Sozo was jumping along with everyone else, a grin on his face.

First Absolute did well, except for one point where Soujiro popped a string from his guitar near the end of one song. Luckily the band that was performing after them offered him a guitar.

It was time for the final song, and Kenshin put away his electric and brought his faithful acoustic onto the stage. He dragged a stool in the middle and took a seat.

Adjusting the mic, he said, "this last one is for my mom…who didn't live long enough to see us now." He swallowed as a few people, mostly girls, gasped with sorrow.

Kenshin strummed the first few chords of "Let It Be," singing alone until after the first chorus. Soujiro joined in alone harmonizing before Sano joined on his base, and lastly with Yahiko.

While Kenshin sang the final verse, he saw the most remarkable thing, nearly making him choke: Sozo openly crying.

Perfect tears rolled down his face, his tears magnifying the pride that sparked in his eyes.

At that moment, everything in Kenshins' mind faded away. All that was left was peace. The constant ache in his chest that was caused by Kaoru was gone – they would somehow come together again; the despair that lived in his heart ever since his mother died dissipated in the smoky haze – she was there.

* * *

A/N: I hope you enjoyed…and I hope this will satisfy you for…a little over 2 weeks because I'll be away on a mission trip during my winter break and I won't be coming back until…really early Tuesday morning (2/26) so yeah. But I'll be bringing a notebook so hopefully I can handwrite most of the chapter at night and stuff.

Please review!

MissGoalie


	5. Countdown to Vacation: 1

A/N: I'm back! My trip was so incredible – I met some amazing people and learned so much. Not to mention I shopped to my heart's content :) but I'm very happy to be back in my room, on my bed with my laptop in front of me.

Standard disclaimers apply (this also includes song lyrics from other artists).

* * *

Countdown to Vacation: 1

Kaoru barely slept. All she could see were the tears that leaked from his beautiful violet eyes. The way he looked straight at her, their eyes meeting, caused her to wonder, as she often did when he looked directly at her, how it was possible for one person to have such expressive eyes. They seemed to speak a language all of their own; that time channeling hurt and fair and pain so clearly that Kaoru couldn't hold herself together for very long.

She stayed up wondering the age-old question of how Kenshin was able to bottle up his emotions. It always killed her to see him internalize every indecency, every wrongdoing, and every pain until he broke.

She got out of bed groggily, stumbling to change into something decent. As she pulled out a Polo and jeans, she remembered that her parents had already left for their trip for St. Johns, meaning that she finally had the house to herself.

But finally having her parents away made her feel a bit lonely.

She pushed the childish thought to the back of her mind, silently chiding herself. She was seventeen-years-old. She could handle living in her house alone for a few days. Besides, she would be out most of the time with Megumi or Enishi. There wasn't any need to act like a twelve-year-old girl.

With that, she pulled her hair into her usual ponytail and smiled in front of her mirror, noting how fake it looked before going to downstairs to make her own breakfast.

* * *

Kenshin was so _wired_.

He was up until two in the morning, lying in his bed thinking about everything. He slowly picked apart every aspect of his life: his friends, Kaoru, his family, the band, school and came to some conclusions about himself and how to live his life.

He also wrote, what he considered, the _best_ song he had ever written.

Never in his life did he write a complete song in one sitting, _and_ didn't want to change any of it. He was so excited that he skipped a few steps as he made his way to the kitchen. Surprisingly, Sozo was sitting by the table, looking as if he could fall asleep right there.

"What are you _doing?_ You don't have school." Kenshin asked as he poured himself a thermo of coffee.

"I figured I'd drive you to school – I need to run a few errands before I peace out of this shitty town." Sozo answered before yawning.

"Okay. Let me just get my guitar then." Kenshin ran up the stairs to grab his acoustic guitar.

When he came back to the kitchen Sozo asked, "How the _hell_ are you so hyper?"

"Well, I'll probably crash in the middle of the day, but I was up _all_ night…well, until two in the morning."

"Yeah, exactly, I was too. But I'm _dying_ right now. I can't believe I actually woke up to my alarm clock."

"I'm just…in _such_ a good mood." Kenshin said cheerfully.

"Are you? Did you figure out the meaning of life or something?" Sozo asked amusedly before standing up. "Okay let's go."

"Well, no. But I just thought about my life. I mean, _really_ thought about every person in my life and analyzed my relationships with them. I think I came to some…realizations."

Sozo nodded as he unlocked the car. "That's good. I did too. I mean, I need to work out a few things and it's going to be hard…but it'll happen."

"Yeah. And you want to know what else?"

"What?"

"I wrote a kick ass song."

"Really? Is it pining and just disturbing?" Kenshin glared at Sozo. "They're still good, I won't deny that, but still."

"No. It's different. I'll e-mail the lyrics tonight or something."

"Okay, sweet."

Halfway on the way to school Kenshin groaned loudly.

"What? Don't tell me you forgot something because there is _no way_ we're turning back – the line to get into the school is _crazy_." Sozo said in a warning tone.

"No, it's just…_school_." Kenshin spat the last word, as if it was something bitter.

"Yeah, it's a pain in the ass."

"Especially certain classes."

"Like what?"

"Physics, first and foremost."

"Well, it can't be as bad as when I took it. Thank God that fucker retired after I left. Hated my teacher."

"Oh, trust me, it's bad."

"Why? Would I know him?"

"Yeah, old as sin. Niida?"

Sozo suddenly stopped the car, causing Kenshin to jerk forward and the subsequent cars behind them to quickly stop. "You have _Niida?_"

A few cars honked before Sozo continued forward. "Yeah, he's such a bastard to me. And it's _only_ me." Kenshin answered.

"Oh my God."

"What?" Kenshin read his shocked expression before shaking his head. "Oh, _God_, please don't tell me…"

"Niida actually said in front of the entire class that I was the _worst_ student he has ever had and he hated coming to school everyday because I gave him so much grief."

"I don't _believe_ this."

"And now, he's treating my little brother like shit? That _tears_ it! I'm going into this school right and kicking his _fat ass!_" Sozo growled, heading toward the visitor's parking lot.

"_No!_ Are you serious? You can't do that! I'll handle him, don't worry. Just calm down."

Sozo sighed loudly as he pulled up to the east-side entrance. "Okay, well, _really_ give it to him, would you? He has a thick head, you know."

Kenshin smiled. "Okay." They sat in silence for a minute. "So…" Kenshin trailed off.

"So."

"I guess this is it."

"Yep, the end of the road. Well, at least until summer."

"You're not gonna come back before? You know, for weekends or something?" Kenshin asked sadly.

Sozo looked down at his hand on the wheel before looking back at Kenshin. "Look, this is…huge. For me. Completely letting go of six years worth of disdain for one person has really been fucking around with my brain. I still can't…_really_ forgive dad yet. Give me more time."

Kenshin nodded. "Okay."

"Talking with you these past two days has definitely made me realize a few things." Sozo added.

"Well that's good. Maybe the next time we see each other we won't be ask fucked up as we are now."

Sozo chuckled. "Maybe." The two were silent for a few moments before Sozo added, "This has been most enlightening. We'll talk…later…right?"

"Yeah, I'll call you?" Kenshin said with more of a questioning tone.

"Yeah, do that. Keep me updated on Kaoru."

"Okay, I will." Kenshin got out of the car with his guitar and waved to his brother before turning on his heel and walking away.

"Hey!" Sozo yelled. Kenshin craned his neck in response. "She loves you, ya know. So don't give up."

"What?"

"Really deep inside, she loves you, I swear it."

"She loves me?" Kenshin asked half jokingly, half seriously.

"_She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_." Sozo sang.

Kenshin laughed. "You're not half bad. Guess the musical talent didn't just go to me." He said in a teasing voice.

"I'm just full of surprises. But aren't we both?"

Kenshin's grin faded a little. Instead, a softer smile too its place. "Yeah, we are."

Sozo nodded before turning to face the road in front of him and speeding out of the school, cutting off a woman in a huge van. Kenshin chuckled as he walked into the school and to his first period class – U.S. Government with Kaoru…and Tomoe.

* * *

"Guess who's coming to Strathmore Hall tonight?" Kenshin asked Kaoru quietly in the middle of class.

"Who?" She asked somewhat disinterestedly, but he wasn't hurt. He knew that she would be interested when he answered her.

"Urban Center." He said with a smile.

He fully had her attention when she turned to fully face him, her eyebrows disappearing behind her bangs. "I thought that you two said that you wouldn't tell each other your plans – that it would always be a surprise."

He held back a loud sigh, still annoyed that he found out. "Some jackass told me after last night. But I thought you'd like to come since Yumi's local for once, you know? She asks about you."

"Really?" She asked softly. He could read the guilt in her eyes – he knew that she hadn't thought about Yumi recently at all.

"It's supposed to be a great show – there are a lot of good bands playing. Good people. You wanna come with the boys and me?"

She smiled sadly, reminiscing. "I…I can't. I have a party to go to."

He snorted. "Right. I forgot. The beginning of spring break fiesta. Of course you need to make an appearance. Whose house is it at?"

"Akira's since his parents are going away to Hong Kong." She looked down at her notes for a moment before meeting his eyes. "Maybe I'll come by later, after the party."

He nodded, knowing that wasn't going to happen. "Sure." He saw Tomoe look at the two of the blankly before turning back to her notes. Her grip on her pen was tighter than before.

"Is Sozo going?" Kaoru asked after a few minutes.

He smiled. "No, he's had enough of me these past two days. He's hanging out with friends until Sunday when he drives back."

"I'm really…_really_ happy that the two of you worked it out." She admitted.

"I am too…" He said softly with a smile still on his face. "I can picture my mom just _beaming_ at the two of us, you know?" Kaoru felt herself grinning at him. "That sounded really weird, didn't it?"

"No. I bet she is beaming up there or wherever she is. And I'm sure your dad is happy…even though you two came together under not-so-great circumstances. Did you…?"

"Uh, yeah, we kind of did. I mean…we'll probably have a heart-to-heart chat one day. But things are kind of back to normal, you know."

She nodded. "That's good that you've listened to him. You've listened to your brother even though he, admittedly, was one of the last people to deserve your time. Hiko deserved to be heard, you know? After all, he did pay for the H.H."

Kenshin chuckled, completely amused, yet thrilled that she still referred to his car as the Himura Honda. "That's true."

"And he will pay for your college tuition."

"Ah, that is a clouded future."

She sighed, removing her hand. "You _are_ going to college. You have to."

"I don't _have_ to do anything." He sighed. "Look, Kao, let's not start with this argument. We both know how it'll end. Besides, we tend to raise our voices whenever we talk about the future, which wouldn't be a good idea in the back of our U.S. Government class."

She laughed lowly before rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "Fine. Sorry, Ken, but someone has to worry about your future."

"It's not your place." He said with a gleam in his eye, heavily hinting on the double meaning. It wasn't her place as in it was his future and he alone has a say in it, as she reminded him three days ago. It wasn't also her place because she technically removed herself from his life over a year ago.

"Sorry, it's early in the morning." She replied coolly. He could practically feel her distancing herself from him.

He shrugged. "No worries. You're the only person I'd want to meddle with my future." He said seriously.

Kenshin rarely spoke seriously – it wasn't in his personality to be serious. He always said that life was too serious to begin with – there was already so much destruction, death, and gloom in this world that he felt that he should try and make the best of life for it was and take everything lightly. That was one of the many things that bothered Kaoru ever since they broke up – he wasn't mature according to her. It wasn't a mature way of living life.

She grazed her top teeth over her bottom lip, her eyes suddenly looking like a lost, stray puppy. But as quickly as it came, it was gone. She looked back at the board and furiously copied down what she had missed.

"You're going to make me fail the test on this chapter." She hissed.

"I could just tell you about this later. The way she teaches this is absolutely ridiculous. It's so vague – I know how much you study for this class just so you can scrape an A minus."

She dropped her pencil on her notebook. "How do you know that?"

He rolled eyes and gave her a look. "Kaoru, for every test in this class you come in with dark rings under your eyes – I know you've stayed up at least until one in the morning. Your steps are also a little sluggish – you drag your feet a little bit. Like when people wear Uggs or Birks and they make that dragging sound on the floor. You also space out sometimes during the essay questions – your eyes just glaze over and you stare at the primary sources without really reading them. That's why you completely rush at the end of your essays, causing Suzuki to take points off I bet."

She stared at him with eyes as wide as silver dollars. For a moment he wondered if he'd spoken too much. He probably sounded like a horrible stalker – an obsessive ex-boyfriend that still clung to the lost hope that she would take him back.

Well, part of it was somewhat true. But that wasn't just it – he was just observant. He was always observant, especially when it came to Kaoru and all her nuances. And she knew that, which was why she gave him a rare, kind smile, like the ones she used to give him when they were best friends.

There was nothing else needed to say. Kenshin smiled to himself as he fruitlessly tried to listen to his teacher's droning of something completely unimportant. He was never going to mention the government in any of his songs – there wasn't a point in making a political statement in music. All it did was stir up controversy and unnecessary fights.

His good mood was back in full throttle. Actually letting out a bit of his emotions did wonders – the weight that was constantly suppressing his heart lightened considerably, especially when Kaoru would every now and then look over to him and smile.

This was a good start for him.

* * *

Kenshin loved Fridays for one reason: there was the passing time between U.S. Government and Choir when he and Kaoru were completely alone, at least until Enishi came out of English and joined them both, which was Kenshin's queue to walk faster or fall behind.

But Kenshin relished this small window of alone time.

"So, I can trust you not to tell anybody about…yesterday?" Kenshin asked.

"Of course." Kenshin gave her a pointed look. "I won't tell _anyone_." She accentuated the last word, heavily hinting that she wouldn't tell Enishi.

He nodded. "Okay."

"You know…I'm really glad I was there." She admitted in a low voice. "I think that was some…good closure. It always bothered me that I poured my heart and soul to you all the time and you rarely did."

Kenshin nearly stopped on the spot. "Kaoru, you know I have problems with –"

"I know, and it's not your fault by any means. It's just…it was a nice change, that's all. I hate seeing you block out pain."

He smiled at her before wrapping the arm that wasn't holding his guitar around her shoulders. "_Memories…_" he began to sing in an operatic voice before being elbowed by her.

She laughed. "You _cannot_ hold a serious conversation!"

"Hey, that was a pretty long time."

"Yeah, that was, I'm proud of you."

"Okay, you wanna know something amazing?"

She smiled at his enthusiasm. "What?"

"I was up _all_ night. Well, 'til two in the morning. But, I came up with a song…and I swear to _God_, Kao, it's…my greatest song. And you know I never brag about my lyrics. But this is _it_."

Her eyes widened. "Really?"

"Yeah…and I want you to hear it." He said, staring at her intensely. "Next week, Battle of the Bands. Please, even if you just come for our one song and leave afterward…I just think you should be there."

She bit her lip. "Well…"

"Kaoru, you're the _only_ person besides the guys who knows how much this _really_ means to me. I'd _really_ like for you to come."

How could he resist those eyes? She never could, and even after a year of convincing herself that was completely over him in everyway, his eyes weren't something she could shake off after just one year. "Okay…I don't see the harm in going." She said nonchalantly.

His slow grin made her realize that he didn't believe her casual response at all, which painfully reminded her that he knew her too well for her to simply lie.

"Going where?" A voice asked by her ear.

She turned to find Enishi by her other side. He was eyeing Kenshin's arm that was still wrapped around her shoulders. Kaoru shrugged Kenshin's arm off, only to be replaced with Enishi's. Kenshin watched Enishi bring her closer to himself.

"We're gonna run off together right after school. I was thinking of Japan, you like Japanese food, yeah?" Kenshin responded after a beat, sending a lopsided grin in Kaoru's direction.

Kaoru laughed before lightly slapping him on his arm. Enishi's jaw clenched for a moment before he gave Kenshin a pointed look.

Kenshin sighed a little before falling behind the couple. But he took great satisfaction in the fact that Kaoru only responded to Enishi's discussion starters with one word, effectively killing any hope of conversation.

* * *

Kaoru was royally pissed off. Not only that, she was embarrassed. One of the reasons she told Kenshin that she was ending things with him was because of his immaturity. But from Enishi's performance, it seemed as if she left one immature guy for another.

She understood that Kenshin loved to bust Enishi's balls and it was just out of a mixture of feelings. She thought that Enishi would see through it and let him be.

But no, Enishi had to retaliate, giving into Kenshin's taunts.

Not only did Enishi reciprocate, he sometimes _initiated_.

As ridiculous as it sounded, she would forgive Kenshin for his immaturity on the situation before Enishi, since he had no right to be immature. Kenshin was dumped, therefore, he held the right to openly insult and do stupid things. Enishi, however, had no right to them.

After all, he had the girl.

She entered the choir room first, deciding to sit with Misao and try talking to her as opposed to being with Enishi. She wanted him to cool down before having a conversation with him.

"Hey, Kaoru, what's up?" Misao said cheerfully.

Kaoru smiled, she could always count on Misao for being happy. "Eh, nothing really, I'm just _really_ glad it's break."

Misao gasped and grabbed Kaoru's hand. "I _know_. I'm also _really_ excited for tonight!"

"Why? What's tonight? You mean Akira's party?" Kaoru asked.

Misao scoffed. "No, I never go to those, you know that. No, tonight _Urban Center_ is coming."

"Oh, I know, Kenshin told me."

Misao's face fell. "_What?_ How does he know?"

"Apparently some guy told him after his performance last night."

"Oh…well…_yeah_. They're coming, which means _Aoshi will be there!_" Misao squealed.

"I'll never understand your obsession for the Iceman." Sano said behind Kaoru, nearly scaring her to death. "Sorry Missy." He added.

Misao's green eyes narrowed. "He's not an _iceman!_"

"Right, and I'm not six feet tall."

"Sano!" Kenshin called from across the room, pointing at his journal before gesturing him to come over. He saw who Sano was talking to and waved at Kaoru and Misao.

"Go, he wants to tell you about some new song he wrote. Says it's his best." Kaoru said, pushing Sano halfheartedly.

"Really now…" Sano muttered before walking toward Kenshin.

Kaoru shook her head with a smile before catching the intense look Misao was giving her. "What?" Kaoru asked.

"Your attitude on Kenshin has changed…" Misao said softly.

Kaoru froze for a moment. "Well…"

"Did you see him yesterday?"

"We…we happened to be at the cemetery at the same time." Kaoru admitted in a low voice.

Misao's eyes widened. "Wow, coincidence."

"Yeah…"

"Or fate. Either one works."

Kaoru didn't really like the idea of it being fate, since it was something that can't be controlled. She liked the idea of herself having control over her life, after all, wasn't that what free will was all about?

She couldn't handle talking to Misao any longer. "I'll be right back." She said, standing up.

"Right." Misao said before glancing toward Enishi and then back at her.

Kaoru walked over to where Enishi was standing. They didn't say anything for a few moments until Enishi snorted in amusement.

"They're like children." Enishi scoffed as he eyed Sano excitedly pointing at the notebook in Kenshin's hands.

"Apparently Ken wrote a really good song. I'm curious to hear it."

Enishi raised his eyebrows at her. "_Ken?_ I don't think I've ever heard you call him that."

"I used to. Old habits die hard." Kaoru said dismissively, although she was slightly annoyed with his reaction – it wasn't that big of a deal in her opinion.

"Right…well you shouldn't call him that…you know, to his face. He might get hopeful or something."

Kaoru whipped her head to give him a glare. She opened her mouth, but then closed it. She then stood up and walked back to her original spot next to Misao.

"Is Matsumoto even here today?" Someone asked out loud over the chatter.

"I thought I saw her this morning…" Another said.

"Do you think after another five minutes we can bail?"

"_No_, that's not an _actual_ rule."

In the corner of Kaoru's eye, Kenshin and the rest of the boys went up to the front of the classroom where various instruments such as xylophones and bongos were strewn. Kenshin had his guitar strapped on and was tuning it. Yahiko had taken a bongo and tested a few beats.

"I think we're about to get some entertainment." Kaoru said to Misao.

Misao looked up to where Kenshin was and squealed. "Yay! I_ love_ when they play." She gushed.

Kaoru smiled, but internally agreed with her friend with enthusiasm. Those four playing together was pure genius. She watched Kenshin sit on the top of the wooden piano, play a few test chords before jumping into a familiar Beatles tune.

"_You're gonna lose that girl_," Kenshin started, followed by Soujiro and Sano singing back up, girly arm motions and all. Half the class chuckled as the performance before them.

Kaoru swayed a little to the music, humming along with Kenshin's enthralling vocals. She momentarily forgot that Kenshin normally wouldn't pick a song at random – there needed to be a reason for it. She found it when he sang, "_'Cause I will treat her right and then you'll be the lonely one_," and gave an obvious glance toward Enishi.

She avoided glancing at Enishi. His expression would obviously be of pure shock at first, then extreme anger. It also didn't help that the entire class saw it and where looking between the two, and sometimes at her, with extreme interest. She snuck a look at Misao, who was quietly singing the words with a small smile on her face.

Misao was aware of the confrontation and was enjoying every moment of it.

Kaoru was about to nudge her hard in annoyance when Kenshin sang quite loudly, "_I'll make a point of taking her away from you, watch what you do_," while glaring at Enishi.

It was finally out in the open: Kenshin will try and win Kaoru back. This past year people had known that he was bitter to some extent of the break up and her quick recovery. However, he was never obvious about his feelings on her. From what he just did, he openly revealed that he still held some feelings for her, an amount still unknown, but they were still there.

Karou felt extremely conflicted. Her first reaction with shock, she herself wasn't _quite_ sure about what he wanted from her. The second was of pleasure; he was finally expressing his thoughts and emotions in a way that was right for him. However, after all the instinctive reactions passed, her mind began working and she felt anger – he was bringing their personal business into the public, something she thought she was done dealing with at the end of sophomore year.

So if she was really angry, why wasn't she able to keep a smile off her face?

* * *

Kenshin groaned as he got closer to his Physics classroom. Forty-five minutes of pure torture. He walked in and slugged his way to his usual seat in the back of the classroom, right behind a very large jock that was a year older than him.

The moment the late bell rang, Niida shut the door in the face of one unfortunate late person. Kenshin's nose twitched in annoyance.

"So, let's get back to the work you did in your labs on Tuesday." Niida said in a booming voice.

"Uh, question," a guy in Kenshin's grade said as his hand shot up in the air. "Are you going to go over electric capacitance? We've barely learned this material –"

"Yuji. This is an _honors_ class. You are expected to learn things on your own."

Kenshin curled his hands into fists under his desks.

"But –"

"If you truly don't understand, then ask a student."

"But we _all _don't understand." A girl named Amane said with her a hand raised.

Niida opened his mouth, most likely to finalize the fact that he wasn't going to go over the material when Kenshin found himself saying out loud, "I know it."

Everyone in the classroom craned their heads to look at him. A strained smile grew on Niida's face.

"Do you, Himura?" He asked, as if not believing him.

"Yeah, in fact, I think I can teach it to the class if you want." Kenshin replied, shrugging his shoulders.

"That will not be necessary, Himura. No need to make up lies."

Kenshin's toes curled in frustration. Niida knew that Kenshin aced every single test he threw to his class. He wasn't an idiot. "No, I don't _lie_. I'll do it right now." Kenshin opened his notebook and flipped through to his last page of notes. "Right, so the electric energy –"

"_Himura_, that's _enough_." Niida said sharply.

"My name is Kenshin." Kenshin blurted, letting his anger get the best of him.

"Excuse me?" Niida said in a low voice, turning to face him again.

"I said…my name is _Kenshin_. I think you're singling me out by _only_ calling me by my last name."

"Himura, please, don't be ridiculous." He turned his attention back to the board. "Since you're not _grasping _the concept…I'll review the –"

Kenshin shot his hand high in the air. "Excuse me, Mr. Niida."

Niida turned and glared at Kenshin. "What is it _this_ time?"

"Please call me Kenshin."

"You're disrupting the class, Himura, _don't_ speak unless it relates to what we're doing."

"Do you even _know_ who you're talking to?" Kenshin asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Do _not_ cop an attitude with me, your grade can't afford it now, can it?" He said with a somewhat wicked smirk.

It was true – his Physics grade was considerably lower than his other grades solely because Niida disliked him.

"I'm _not_ Sozo." Kenshin said loudly. "We're two completely different people."

"Of _course_ you're not _him_, _no_ child is like that – he was a _demon_."

Kenshin slammed his hands onto his desk and shot up. "I will not let you _insult_ my brother when he _clearly_ has more maturity than you will _ever_ have." Half the students gasped while the other half stared at him with open mouths, which included Niida. "No need to show me the door, I'll see you in the principal's office, yes?" Kenshin threw his messenger bag onto his shoulder and stormed out of the classroom without looking back once.

When he got into the hallway, he nearly threw his bag against the lockers. Never in his life had he felt such frustration and anger. He was finally _fed up_.

It took two minutes to get to the main office. Ms. Nakamura who was the secretary looked up at him when he reached her desk. "Hi, Kenshin, what're you here for?"

"I…talked back to Niida in Physics. It wasn't pretty." Kenshin said in a low voice.

She sighed. "Oh, Jesus, when you see your brother give him a slap for me, would you? I swear he ruined that man." She shook her head before pointing toward the line of chairs by the wall. "Just wait there for him to come in, I'll inform Mr. Yoshida." She took her phone from its cradle and dialed.

"Right…" Kenshin took a seat and waited for a few minutes. Niida strode in with pursed lips, not even bothering to look at Kenshin, who assumed to follow him into the principal's office.

The office was at the end of the hall of offices, and was consequently the biggest one. There was the standard wooden desk and comfy leather chair behind it along with a wall-to-wall book shelf. Kenshin took the seat closest to the door while Niida took the one on the left. There was an empty seat in between them.

The principal entered the office from a side door, sighing as he took a seat.

Kenshin suddenly realized who the empty chair was for. "Is my father really a necessity for this?"

"I think he should be informed of this, so yes," the principal answered.

Kenshin sighed. "Okay, so, should we wait for him?"

"No need, I'm here." Hiko said front the doorway.

Kenshin gave his father a charming smile. "Hi…"

"That smile might've worked on Shina, but it never did on me." Hiko mumbled before taking a seat between his son and Niida, who looked extremely uncomfortable having such a large man next to him. "So, what did Kenshin do?"

The principal sighed, and was about to speak until Niida beat him to it. "Your _extremely_ rude son tried to take over my class and talked back."

"You were _insulting_ my brother." Kenshin exclaimed. He looked at the principal directly in the eye "Mr. Yoshida, I don't think he ever told you this, but he has been treating me like absolute _crap_ this entire year."

"I have not treated you any differently from my other students." Niida said.

"My eldest had you. He used to rant about how _horribly_ you treated him." Hiko said, finally remembering.

"Your sons have _no_ respect for their elders! They clearly don't respond well to authority." Niida raged.

"That's _enough_, Tsuneo." The principal stated sharply. Niida promptly shut his mouth as the principal looked at Hiko, then at Niida, and finally held his gaze on Kenshin. "You may go to your next class, Kenshin. Tell Ms. Nakamura to write you a pass. You may leave as well, Mr. Himura. I'm _very_ sorry for this madness."

Hiko and Kenshin nodded and stood up at the same time. Kenshin went to Nakamura and asked for a pass while Hiko waited patiently.

When they were in the hallway, Hiko asked, "What the hell were you thinking?" It wasn't in an angry tone; it was just full of curiosity.

"Uh…well…I don't know. I guess I couldn't take it anymore. And Sozo told me this morning that he had Niida and it just…made me even angrier." Kenshin answered with honesty. "Speaking of which, I want to call Sozo before I go to Pre-Calc." He pulled out his cell phone and dialed Sozo's number, which was under the name "coolest brah."

"_Wow. You made fucking _great_ playlists for her."_ Sozo said after the second ring.

"What?" Kenshin questioned.

"_Uh, yeah, I went into your iTunes. I was curious."_

"What an invasion of privacy." But Kenshin didn't really care – his brother already knew everything about him.

"_All these songs just fit. You should give these to her. Fucking blow her away."_

"We'll see. One step at a time."

"_Well, I give my OK. Definitely do it. We all agree."_

"Who's we?"

"_Norio and Tetsuo! They think it's awesome."_

"Glad I have their approval." Kenshin honestly had no idea who they were.

"_So why'd you call me, miss me already?"_

"Not quite…I did it. I totally stood up to Niida and stuck it to him."

There was a silence for a few seconds before a piercing whooping sound erupted from the other end of the line. _"Yeah! And that's the way the Himura brothers do it! So what happened? Did he combust or something?"_

Kenshin laughed. "No, we chatted in the principal's office with dad…and basically the principal is not pleased with Niida's behavior." He answered with a smirk.

"I knew this had to do with Sozo…" Hiko muttered.

"_Well that's totally boss. Aight I gotta peace, we're stopping at Iwao's house and going back up to the U. See ya!"_

"Bye." Kenshin hung up and looked toward his father. "So…am I gonna be grounded or something?"

Hiko paused before shaking his head. "No. Niida was out of line, it was understandable. But that's not an excuse to speak out against every teacher. You're not going to pull a Sozo." Hiko said in a warning tone.

"Right, right…"

Hiko put a hand on Kenshin's shoulder and stared at him intensely. Kenshin was taken aback for a moment, not quite used to Hiko staring at him directly in the eyes for a long period of time. Hiko and Sozo's eyes were almost identical. "I'm sorry that I didn't know. That I don't really know much about your life."

Kenshin shrugged. "I don't tell you anything. It's fine."

"But that's partially my fault. I know it's too late to go back, but just know, I _am_ here. I may be like a ghost in the house, but that doesn't mean I'm not really there. Got it?"

Kenshin swallowed, not able to say anything. "Okay, thanks." He managed to whisper.

Hiko awkwardly patted his son's shoulder before walking ahead to the entrance of the school. "Don't come home at a ridiculous time and don't drink and drive." Hiko called out before walking outside.

Kenshin laughed and nodded, despite Hiko not being able to see his consent.

* * *

It was finally nearing the end of the day. All that was left was Gym and A.P. English for Kenshin.

They were playing softball for the final time. Kenshin's team was in the outfield and he got assigned to second base. Kaoru's team was up at bat and Enishi had just hit a double. He was standing on the base with Kenshin, neither saying anything until Enishi finally asked in a low voice, "When are you going to _give up?_" before chuckling.

Kenshin laughed a little as well. "How about when you stop dying your hair, and even then, we'll see." Enishi scoffed a little. The smile on Kenshin's face withered a bit, Enishi seemed too happy for some odd reason and he wanted to know why. "What puts you in a honky-dory mood? You're always a moody asshole around me."

Enishi grinned. "Nothing really, just excited about vacation. Get a nice break from school. Are you doing anything?" He asked casually.

Kenshin narrowed his eyes at him. "Are you…trying to ask me out?" Kenshin asked in a serious voice, trying as hard as he could not to laugh.

Enishi's smile slipped off his face as he glared back at Kenshin. "Jackass."

The girl at bat hit another foul ball before they turned their attentions back on each other.

Kenshin laughed. "Battle of the Bands preparation mostly."

"Oh, right, you're still holding on to that crazy dream of yours."

"And maybe I'll try and charm your girlfriend in between." Kenshin retorted, immediately feeding into the anger he felt whenever someone insulted his ambitions.

Another foul.

Enishi quietly barked out a laugh. "I don't think so."

"And what makes you so certain, Mr. Golden Man?" Kenshin asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Because the two of us are going to spend the whole break together."

"Oh, wow." Kenshin said in a sarcastic voice, even though inside he was seething with jealousy.

"Yeah, lucky me, especially since I'm going into territory that you didn't tread on."

Kenshin felt his insides numb. "What do you mean?" He asked wearily, vaguely knowing he was taking the bait.

Enishi smirked. "Let's put it this way, after vacation you don't stand a chance. She'll be completely mine by the end of next week." With that, the girl hit the ball and was flying toward second base, getting two runners to make it to home base.

That's when it hit him: _home base._

They were going to have sex.

Kenshin couldn't even breathe as the ball he was supposed to catch flew past him. He couldn't hear his classmates yelling at him – he could only hear the blood pounding in his ears at an extremely fast tempo. Thoughts of Enishi and Kaoru flooded his mind, making him sick to his stomach. It was just too soon! He didn't expect her to actually –

"Kenshin Himura!" Mrs. Mimura yelled from across the gym, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"I don't feel well." He stated shortly before striding out of the gym, avoiding everyone's stares, especially Kaoru's.

When he was outside in the hallway, he let out a few breaths as he tried to clear his head. He walked over to the brick wall which held all the athletic plaques and medals and sat down, hoping to calmly think through this.

But what could he do? He thought of acting immature about it and mention what Enishi told him to Kaoru, but she'd probably confirm it, which would be the last thing he'd want to hear. Another option was to tell her to not do it – any guy that bragged to another about having sex, especially for the first time, didn't deserve anyone as good as Kaoru.

He put he head in hands in defeat. There was nothing he could do except hope that Kaoru would get scared at the last minute, like what happened over a year ago.

"Some girls might like emotional guys, but I think it's a rather silly thing." The voice of Mrs. Mimura cut through his thoughts.

He raised his head to look at her standing over him. "I wasn't crying." He stated, pointing to his dry face.

She waved a hand dismissively. "Are you just going to take what Yukishiro says? You never did before – why now?"

He looked at her with a puzzled expression before a small smile graced his face. "So you _are_ just amused by the two of us."

"Naturally – contrary to what my students say I'm no fool. I'm sharper than about half the students here."

"I don't doubt that."

She sighed. "Look, kid, I'm not really fond of high school love. I think it's superficial and not real. But…you're more persistent than any guy I've _ever_ seen…so don't you give up." She said, shaking a fist.

"You're making it seem like a sports game…and it's not."

"How would you know? You've never been on a team in your life!"

He shrugged, not denying her statement. "In sports, it's not like your heart gets destroyed every time you lose. You bounce back, because it _doesn't matter_. Not like love or whatever."

She smiled wisely. "Why can't that apply to love? It doesn't matter, because the good will always outweigh the bad and you'll always have that hope that the next time you might just win."

He stared at her blankly for a moment before stating, "I can't believe I just bonded with a gym teacher…who gave me advice on how to handle my love life…_awkward_."

She cleared her throat. "Right, that was completely off the record by the way."

"Seems like a lot of teachers want to do that with me; they like to dump their baggage on me."

"It was advice, kid, which you should learn to take from your elders."

Kenshin snorted. "You're the second person to tell me that…the second _teacher_ no less!"

"Who was it?" She asked with interest.

"Saito – my math teacher."

"Wait, the wolf-man?" She immediately asked before adding, "We're off the record once more."

He laughed. "Yeah, he is, but he…_kind of_ had the right to give me advice since I've known him for years."

"Huh…" she said before hissing, "Crap, I've got to get back to my class. Do you want to go back in or do you just want to leave? Go to the nurse?"

He smiled. "I'll pass on staying. Thanks…I mean…you know…" He trailed off in embarrassment.

"You're welcome. I'll wait for the day she finally wizens up." She said before walking back into the gym.

He smiled as the door shut behind her before realizing once again that he had a rather intimate conversation with a gym teacher, which made him shudder a bit before he stood up to go to the locker room to change.

* * *

"What did Enishi say to you?" Kaoru asked lowly when she found him sitting in the empty cafeteria finishing a book for his A.P. English class next period.

Kenshin shook his head and put his book down. "What?"

"You heard me – tell me what Enishi told you. What did he say to you that was so disturbing that it made you run out of the gym? You've always taken his shit before."

Kenshin looked away from her, not willing to say anything.

"Wow, I'm surprised. I thought you would be all over this. Seeing that I'm so pissed, I'd of thought you'd feed into it." Kaoru said in a shocked voice.

"It really wasn't anything. It was the usual and I just got fed up with it."

"Bullshit, you never get fed up with anything."

"Did you hear the rumors?"

She paused. "What rumors?"

"I totally bitched out Niida in Physics today. It was very…exhilarating."

Kaoru's eyes widened. "What is _with_ you today? Not that it's necessarily a _bad_ thing…I don't know. You're just being different. You're acting like…"

He shrugged. "…The way I used to be?"

She bit her bottom lip and nodded. "Did Sozo knock some sense into you?" She asked softly.

"I guess you can say that…" he started before pausing and nodding. "Yeah, he did. It's good to have him on my team."

She instinctively put her hand on top of his and smiled at him. "Maybe I can be back on yours?" She asked quietly. "We can hang out, watch movies or something. Because we're still friends, first and foremost, right?"

His eyebrows completely disappeared into his bangs. He only dreamed of her saying that because the worst part of the break up for him was not being able to talk to her, their connection completely severed. He only had to live by second glances and fleeting smiles.

Because of this, he laced his hand through hers and grinned. "Well, I _suppose_ you can be on two teams. I'll allow that, make this _one_ exception."

She grinned. For some reason, she felt so much better hearing that – being on Kenshin's team seemed so bright and light.

"What are you two _doing?_"

Kaoru looked up and saw Enishi staring at the two of them with a calm expression on his face, but she could tell he was very annoyed.

"_Nothing_. We're just _talking_." Kaoru gritted.

"Chill, Yukishiro, don't want to pop a blood vessel." Kenshin said calmly before standing up. "I'll talk to you later, Kao. Oh! I'll see you at Ayame's bat mitzvah!"

"Oh!" She completely forgot about Ayame's bat mitzvah. Ayame was a girl that Kenshin and Kaoru used to baby-sit for years. "Yeah! That should be fun!" Kaoru continued cheerfully.

"We should go to Physics, Kaoru."

She closed her eyes briefly before smiling at Kenshin. "Right. See you!"

When they got to the empty hallway, Kaoru grabbed his hand and stopped him.

"Enishi, listen to me. I can't completely erase my past with Kenshin. You know what, it's _impossible_ to do that. And don't think I haven't tried. You're just going to have to accept that Kenshin and I have a_ long _history. I thought you were cool about this when we first started going out, but lately you've just been _ragging_ me about him…" Kaoru took a breath and looked at him steadily. "I feel like you needed a reminder."

"I know, Kao, believe me," for a brief moment Kaoru wanted to scold Enishi for calling her that since he never did, "but lately you two have been…" he trailed off.

Kaoru shook her head. "I can't write Kenshin off just because you don't like him. In fact, I will _never_ write him off, because he's a guy that needs support. He's really messed up, Enishi." She admitted the last bit in a whisper. "With his mother's death, it was just really difficult. If you can't understand this and accept it, then clearly we have bigger things to discuss."

Enishi nodded solemnly. "Okay, I trust you. It's just _him_…"

She shook her head once more. "If there's one person I know that would never hurt me or do anything to me, it would be him."

"You know that _I_ wouldn't hurt you too, right?" Enishi asked.

After a beat Kaoru said, "of course." She kissed his cheek before walking ahead to Physics.

* * *

At the end of the day, while Kenshin was waiting with his guitar for Sano to whip around the side of the school to pick him up, he saw Kaoru walking to her car. She looked up at him and gave him a small smile and wave.

He returned the gesture, almost wishing to call out to her, to beg her that she shouldn't stay with Enishi. That she shouldn't lose herself in the throws of fake smiles and shallow appearances during the break. He was afraid that he was probably going to lose her for good.

Sano honked, ripping Kenshin out of his reverie. When Kenshin got in the car Sano exclaimed, "Yahiko's sick! He went home at the end of fourth period."

"Shit! Did he get what I had last weekend?" Kenshin asked, wincing.

"Yeah, I texted him during math and he said he was throwing up like crazy."

Kenshin winced again, putting a hand over his stomach. His abs were still a little sore from throwing up constantly. "That _really_ sucks. I'll visit him later and you and Sou just avoid him so you two won't get sick."

"Yeah, I told Soujiro to just chill until later. We'll meet up at my house or something."

Sano stopped in Kenshin's driveway after a minute of silence. "Thanks, man, I'll call you later." Kenshin said as he pulled his guitar out of the back seat

"Alright, peace!" Sano said before speeding out onto the road.

Kenshin never really realized how similar Sozo and Sano really were. Shrugging, he went into the house through the garage, knowing he had to get gas for his car, which was on the last quarter of the tank. However, when he walked in, he saw the car shine like it did after a good wash. Turning the ignition, he smiled fondly when he saw the small arrow point at the "F."

"Thanks Sozo." He whispered out loud. A white piece of paper caught Kenshin attention from the corner of his eye. It was resting on the passenger seat. With hands that were shaking a little, he opened up the note which read,

_No problem, brah. Oh, by the way, since I washed your car __and__ got gas, you owe me twenty bucks from our two trips to the diner. I expect the money back, bitch. Cya - Sozo_

Kenshin laughed out loud as he folded the note back and placed it in his glove compartment.

* * *

Later that night, Soujiro drove Yahiko's van Sano and Kenshin to Strathmore Hall. They parked by the library and walked two blocks to the entrance that was deep inside a dark alleyway.

"You know, that never ceases to scare the crap out of me." Soujiro admitted as he walked up the stairs to the music hall.

"What are you, a girl? We live in Strathmore. Nothing bad happens here." Sano said, rolling his eyes.

"I _know_, but still…"

After they paid admission, they walked into the hall, which was a very large room with colorful drapes hanging from the ceiling. Black and white cityscapes adorned the walls along with couches and chairs. There was a small bar in the corner of the room beside the stage. The room was already half full and dancing along to the band on stage, who was singing a cover of an Eagles song. Kenshin was about to go backstage to find Yumi when he found her sitting on a stool, staring at him.

"I have to make a confession." Kenshin started, walking toward Yumi.

"Oh? And what's that?" Yumi said with a coy smile that Kenshin knew was completely fake.

He chuckled. "I knew you were going to be here." He said rather seriously.

The smile was completely wiped off her face and was replaced with a blank look. "What?"

He shrugged. "Some idiot told me Urban Center was coming." He shook his head. "I was going to go anyway before I heard you were coming."

She muttered a curse under her breath. "I wanted it to be a surprise. I was going to look for you around town with the guys if I had to – you get quite restless in music halls."

He nodded, putting his hands in his pockets. "True. But I'm actually in a somewhat good mood tonight."

"Are you really?" She asked with sincere interest.

"Yeah, I actually had a good conversation with Kaoru today. _Actually_, it was _multiple_ conversations." He said with a triumphant smile.

She beamed at him. "That's good! She just needs time and some doses of you to see that she was an idiot of ever _considering_ leaving you. Although I'll admit that I'll miss hooking up with you – you were my favorite person." She admitted. "You always treated me well – and I kind of liked the whole no-sex thing. It was different." She got up from the stool and stopped one foot in front of him.

He smiled for two reasons: one, because she was wearing bright, violet skinny jeans, and two, because he honestly didn't know what he would do without her. "Thank you. For everything."

She waved her hand dismissively. "No worries. Let's stop being sentimental, shall we?" She brought her arms around his neck and whispered in his ear, "your van or mine?"

* * *

The party was already out of control and it wasn't even nine o'clock.

Hundreds of people were in Akira's house or outside in his backyard. Loud music deafened her ears, the base and drums seemed to be playing inside her stomach, constantly thumping.

"This is _crazy!_" Kaoru yelled in Megumi's ear.

"_What?_"

"_This is crazy!"_

"I know! It's the best one yet!" Megumi said loudly with a grin.

Kaoru only grimaced. She enjoyed a good party, but this was beyond her range of enjoyment – to her it was all a headache.

Megumi grabbed her hand. "Come on!" The two of them tried to weave themselves through the throbbing crowd, bumping into more than one couple hooking up along the way.

Kaoru already wanted to leave and she hadn't been there for even ten minutes. She broke away from Megumi, yelling that she was going to find Enishi and leave with him.

As she walked through the house, asking people where he was, she was planning on what she was going to do when they got to her house: she would change into sweats (unless he thought she looked cute in her outfit, then she wouldn't change) and they would watch a movie, probably of his choice. Anything to get away from the chaos.

She finally got a direct answer when someone from the lacrosse team said, "He went upstairs. He looked kind of tipsy. He drank quite a bit."

She winced. He rarely drank enough to get himself completely drunk. She somehow felt responsible for that. After all, she treated him coldly this week.

The first bathroom was empty. The second bathroom was occupied and she thought that maybe he was inside emptying his stomach. However, when he heard male moaning and a girl gasping, she knew that there was some other activity happening behind the door.

She shuddered as she checked each of the rooms. One had a group of freshmen girls talking in it, which made her smile. Another had a couple making out (she quickly shut the door and apologized profusely). The last bedroom had to be the master bedroom. She opened the door slowly and peeked inside.

What she saw made her legs go numb.

Enishi. In bed. With a girl. Nearly naked.

They were furiously making out on the king size bed. Enishi's shirt was discarded and the girl under him was trying to take off his jeans, her shirt joined with Enishi's. Kaoru also saw a pink laced bra sticking out from the tangled covers.

She robotically turned around, not bothering to completely shut the door. The music seemed to have faded away and all she could hear was her heart pounding. Walking down the stairs in a trance she dropped the cup of beer that she was given, having only taken one sip. She vaguely heard a girl yelling in her ear about ruining her new shoes. She also heard Megumi or Tomoe, she couldn't tell anymore, yell in her ear as well, but she couldn't make out the words. Everything was muffled.

Finally making it outside she took deep breaths, trying to clear her head. But as soon as she could, the images of Enishi with another girl hit her with full throttle, bringing tears to her eyes. Her cheeks grew hot as she walked back to her car, never feeling so humiliated.

Someone must have seen at one point – or will see soon. Word would spread like wildfire that the golden couple of the school finally fell off its high horse – the perfect guy has cheated on the perfect girl. How scandalous.

She let out a dry sob as she started her car. As she managed to pull out of the driveway she vaguely remembered learning in driver's education that driving when you're feeling extremely emotional wasn't wise. Gripping the steering wheel tighter she wondered where she was going to go – she couldn't go home, she couldn't stand the thought of being home alone. No, she wanted to be with someone. She wanted someone to comfort her, to be with her without speaking. She wouldn't have to explain herself at all.

That was when she unconsciously decided to go downtown.

* * *

Yumi was known to take risks in anything. She was very daring. That was why she boldly sang "Pieces" by Sum 41 as her closing song for the night.

The crowd silently listened in the beginning, recognizing the familiar cords in the beginning of the song. They slowly began to cheer a bit and talk with other people, at ease, accepting the way she sung the song.

Kenshin was standing next to Soujiro with his eyes closed, letting Yumi's well-rounded, and sultry voice fill him.

"_Sometimes it's so crazy, but nothing can save me, but it's the only think that I have…_" She sung into the mike, holding it with both hands. The crowd was singing along with her too.

Maybe last week Kenshin would've said that nothing could really save him – from his thoughts, nightmares, everything. But this week had given him a bit of hope – something to hold on to. He wasn't alone anymore. He had his older brother now, which was more than enough.

It was just when he was about to ponder on Kaoru when she came into the hall and everything seemed to have frozen.

His eyes widened. He didn't think she'd actually come. But…was she crying? He watched her with fascination as she weaved her way through people, looking for someone. When her eyes fixated on him, he realized that she was looking for _him_.

She was a foot away from him when she looked at him with those large, blue eyes, looking like she did first period in Government class, except this time it was magnified, and it was true. She was truly lost, and most horribly, hurt.

He wordlessly stepped closer to her and gently brought her head to his chest with his hand. He held her close, letting her cry into his shirt as he rested the side of his jaw on the top of her head.

"_Nothing could ever be so wrong/It's hard to believe, it never gets easy/I guess I knew that all along_."

Kenshin swallowed as she grabbed fistfuls of the back of his shirt, bringing them closer together. He had absolutely no idea what caused her to fall to pieces before him; all he could do was silently be there for her.

* * *

A/N: Oh my God. This was _so_ long. I'm _really_ sorry. I didn't plan this to be over 27 pages! But there was all this stuff I needed to fit in and…_God_. I'm sorry for all those people who don't really like reading very long chapters! Next chapter will _not_ be as long, I promise!

Please review!

MissGoalie


	6. Vacation: 1

A/N: And the spring vacation officially begins! Too bad mine isn't starting until mid-April XD

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 1

"Okay, Kaoru, I think that's enough." Kenshin said, trying to gently pry the beer from her hand.

"_No!_ I'm having _fun!_" Kaoru said with a giggle.

Kenshin sighed. It was past midnight and Kaoru had been taking beer after beer, clearly trying to forget whatever happened earlier that night. "Come on, let's go home."

"I'm _not_ going home." She said sharply.

After a moment, he realized why she was so vehement about staying. "I'll stay with you. You're not going to be alone. I'll be right with you." He said.

She paused for a moment before taking another swing of the beer. "Al_right_ let's get in the car!"

Hesighed again. "You're kind of an annoying drunk." He muttered as he helped her off the stool and toward the exit.

"Hey, do you need any help?" Yumi asked with a hand on his shoulder.

"Nah, I'll be okay."

"Yu_mi!_" Kaoru exclaimed before giggling. "I haven't thought about you in _so long_."

Yumi smiled sadly. "I figured you hadn't."

"But I _really_ miss you. We used to have _so_ much fun backstage." Despite Kaoru's drunken state, her words rang true.

"Yeah, we did. But we'll see each other more often, right?"

"Oh, def, def. You're so _real_, you know?" Kaoru tried to pat Yumi's shoulder, but awkwardly ended up patting her elbow.

"Okay, I think it's time to go now. Bye, Yumi. I'll see you next week?" Kenshin said as he hoisted Kaoru up more on her feet.

"Yep, good luck with preparing – you guys are gonna own." Yumi answered with a smile.

He carefully walked down the stairs with her, cursing to himself. Why did Strathmore Hall have to be on the _second _floor?

When he felt the cool breeze of the night caress his face he sighed. Kaoru was still giggling as he half-carried her to her car. On his way, he found Misao and Aoshi talking outside Urban Center's van, where he and Yumi had made out only an hour ago.

Misao turned her attention over to Kenshin and Kaoru and frowned. "What the _hell_ happened?" She asked, pointing to Kaoru.

"Ah, well, she had a few drinks." Kenshin gritted as Kaoru laid more of her weight onto him.

Misao looked at her friend thoughtfully. "I wonder what happened at that party."

Kaoru's head suddenly snapped up. "I _hate_ boys." She growled.

Kenshin and Aoshi were taken aback by her statement, Kenshin more openly.

"Should Misao take her home?" Aoshi asked, his eyes managing to reveal pity for Kenshin.

"No, let Kenshin do it." Misao said quickly, a spark in her eye joining the smile on her face.

"Right…okay see you guys later." Kenshin said, trying to wave awkwardly but gave up seeing it was impossible to hold Kaoru up with one hand. 

He found Kaoru parked in a handicapped spot crookedly. He would've laughed out loud if it weren't for the fact that she was probably crying on the entire way over. 

The ride was relatively silent, only disturbed by a few hiccups here and there. He was very thankful that Kaoru lived closer to downtown than he did, so he only had to drive the Volkswagen for a few minutes, which he decided was not a great car to drive.

"Alright, Kao, let's go to bed." He said, taking his key out and making his way to the passenger side. 

When he reached over to take off her seatbelt, he got a generous whiff of her perfume. He groaned as he carefully got her out of the car. "Why must you torture me with that freaking perfume?" He grumbled to himself as he fumbled for her house keys. "I wonder if Yukishiro really appreciates it. You probably thought that if it got to me, it could get to him." He continued to mumble as he walked up the stairs at a crawling pace.

His arms were burning as he placed her on top of her blue comforter. She smiled at him in a drunken stupor, and he hoped that in the morning she would somehow remember that he brought her home.

He looked at her alarm clock which read half past midnight.

He started to pull the sheets out from under her so he could tuck her in. "Alright, Kao time for sleep." He said as if talking to a five-year-old, his hands on either side of her.

But before he could place the blanket on top of her, she pulled the collar of his shirt down, making him lose balance and to fall on top of her. He expected her to giggle, but was surprised to see her look at him with extreme seriousness.

She was definitely _not_ a five-year-old.

He was too aware of her hips aligning with his and the way her shirt had ridden up so he could feel the heat from her stomach radiate into his. When her lips parted he couldn't breathe.

For a moment he wanted to indulge and kiss her. After all, it had been over a year since he last held her this close. He leaned in a bit closer. It wasn't as if she'd remember in the morning – she was too drunk at this point. But when her hot breath tickled his face, he smelled the alcohol and grimaced.

He didn't want their first kiss in over a year to taste like Budweiser, despite his love for it.

Instead, he placed a tender kiss on her forehead before removing his weight off her. She grabbed his arm and groaned.

"Stay with me, please?" She asked in a small voice.

He bit his bottom lip, staring into her wide, teary eyes. He nodded. "Yeah, I'll be right over there."

"Hold my hand until I sleep." She murmured before closing her eyes.

He placed his other hand on top of hers and watched her breathe.

* * *

After Kenshin was sure that Kaoru was asleep, he drove home with her car to sleep. He set his alarm to nine o'clock so he could be in her room when she woke up. 

He drove back to her house in his own car for two reasons: one, not being able to drive her car for another time, and two, because he wanted to take her somewhere later and she wouldn't know where it was.

When he came into her room, he held three aspirin in one hand and a glass of water in the other. Thankfully, she was still sleeping. He placed what will be her first demands on her nightstand and watched her sleep for a few moments.

His eyes wandered around the room, taking note that most of it stayed the same except for all the photos were different. The pictures that used to be of her and Misao, her and Kenshin, and her with the band, were replaced with ones of Megumi, Tomoe, and Enishi. On her nightstand there was one of Enishi and her smiling in each other's arms, taken over the summer. He grimaced at it before gently putting it facedown. Then his eyes strayed to her purse that was dropped by her doorway. There was a light blinking inside. Curiosity overwhelming him, he took her phone out from her purse and saw she had ten missed calls. He opened the phone and looked at the numbers.

The earliest was from Megumi the night before, and she called twice. Tomoe also called her once. 

Enishi called her seven times in a row, the earliest being at seven in the morning.

He gripped her cell phone tightly. Never in his life did he want to beat the living crap out of someone until that moment. But then he looked over at Kaoru and his expression changed from pure anger to sorrow. She didn't deserve this at all.

He sighed as he put her phone back her bag and took a seat on the cushioned rocking chair in the corner of the room. He automatically swung his leg over the armrest and closed his eyes, hoping to gain another hour or so of sleep. When he got home at one, he couldn't fall asleep right away. The warm feeling of having her beneath him kept him awake.

He heard groans after forty-five minutes of sleeping. Creaking an eye open, he saw her flop onto her back.

"Fucking shit!" She moaned, bringing her hands to her head. "Never drinking, again."

He laughed a little, causing her to sit up in fear. However, her headache made her clutch her head in agony. "God _damn_ it!"

"You had five beers, in case you were wondering." He said after a minute.

"Figured." She mumbled. "What the hell are you doing here?"

He shrugged. "To make sure you were okay."

She brought her hands to her mouth, gasping. "You brought me home."

"Indeed I did."

"And…" She groaned, bringing her hands to her eyes. "Did I do anything…?" She trailed off, knowing he knew what she meant.

He swallowed. "No, you passed out right when you got into bed."

She let out a snort. "Thanks for lying."

A smile grew on his face, despite her not being able to see. "It wasn't terrible."

"Of course it wasn't for _you_."

He smiled to himself. She was right, it wasn't too terrible. "Except for the fact that your breath smelled bad."

"Fuck you." She said with a hint of a smile. They sat in a comfortable silence until she asked, "Why are you here?"

He stared at her. "I just answered that –"

"_No_, I mean, you didn't _have_ to come back. You can go now – I'm fine. I _was_ fine when I got home and fell asleep."

He exhaled loudly and started rocking in the chair. After a few minutes he stopped rocking and leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees.

"Okay, here's the thing, I'm not going anywhere." He stated simply.

She looked at him flabbergasted. "What do you mean you're not _going_ anywhere?"

"I mean…I'm _here_ for _you_. I know for a fact that if I leave now, you'll be a hermit for a week and not do anything, except bitch and moan about your horrible life. And frankly, my dear, that will not be allowed in this lifetime."

"And why the hell not? My life pretty much _sucks_ right now." She snapped.

He sighed. "But it _doesn't_. I mean, it looks a little bleak right now, but…you're not alone." He nodded before looking down. "Remember what I said? Almost three years ago on that warm night in August? 'Despite everything that may happen after tonight, I'll always come back to you, no matter what. For anything.' And I stand by that." He was looking at her with an intensity that she never quite got used to, especially after a year with its absence.

Not knowing what to say, she took the glass of water beside her bed and swallowed the three aspirin. Why did he _always_ say the right thing at the right time?

"Jesus, Himura, you sure know how to tug heartstrings." Kaoru said, taking another sip of water.

"It's more like…I mean what I feel and the words come after." He shifted in the chair. "After all, that's what all conversations should be like, reaching one heart to another. There shouldn't be any trickery or false pretenses. There shouldn't be double meanings or rules. Words should come from here," he pointed to heart, "otherwise there's no point in talking at all."

She nearly laughed. "Wow…I totally forgot how deep you can really get."

He shook his head. "No you didn't." He said with a straight face, his gaze intense once again.

Her face broke into a small smile as she looked down at her comforter. "You're right." She whispered.

After a minute he coughed before standing up. "So," he started, walking over to her bed and sitting on the edge, "what do you say?"

She shook her head in disbelief. "Why are you doing this? After hurting you all these months, why do you want to help me?"

A breath escaped from his lips. "Honestly?" She nodded. "Because getting dumped for being immature doesn't compare to being cheated on by the one who claims to love you."

Tears filled her eyes as the reality of the situation hit her. "Oh _God_." She refused to break down like she did the night before. At that moment she just felt embarrassed that he was able to figure out what happened and that he was probably gloating.

"Hey," he said softly while gently tipping her chin up so he could meet her eyes. "I'm not saying anything, okay?"

She bit her bottom lip before nodding. After managing to compose herself she said, "Can you get out? I need to change."

He grinned as he stood up. "We're going to South Harbor." He said as he walked out of the room.

"What's there?" She asked as she held the door knob.

His smile broadened. "The music store." He said before she shut the door.

She sighed as she turned to her drawers, her head still pounding. Searching through her drawers for something to wear was very easy – being in Kenshin's presence didn't mean she had to worry about how she looked. With that thought, she pulled out her favorite pair of jeans – they were slightly baggy and did nothing to show off her legs. She also threw on a white long-sleeve Polo. For a moment she wondered when the last time was when she walked out of the house looking like that.

When she was about to walk out of her room, she spotted her bag on the floor. She picked it up, about to check her phone, when she chucked the bag to the other side of the room to let out some aggression. Feeling better, she walked out of her room with a smile on her face.

* * *

"Dude, where's my car?"

He laughed at her confused expression. "At my house."

"_Why?_"

"Well," he started, unlocking the doors and getting into the driver's seat, "because, one, you don't know how to get to the store, two, I _really_ don't like driving your car, and three, it's an excuse to come back to my house after this."

She smiled as she got into the car. "Alright then." She then started looking around the inside, a smile unknowingly gracing her features. She truly missed being in his car – it smelled like him. 

"What do you want to listen to? You're the DJ." He said, handing her his iPod.

Carefully avoiding touching his hand, she took his iPod and scrolled through his massive list of artists. "What was that band you mentioned on Monday?" She asked quietly, making him pause, about to start the car.

A smile grew on his face as he turned on the ignition. "All Time Low."

She nodded as she found the band. She plugged the iPod into the cassette adapter and waited a few moments before a catchy guitar riff filled the car.

The ride to the music store held no conversation whatsoever. It consisted of Kenshin banging his head to the drums, Kaoru attempting to finish off lyrics, and both of them laughing. At a red light, a car-full of teenage girls was looking at them weirdly as they were doing a hand clapping game along with dancing to the lyrics.

"Whadda you lookin' at?" Kaoru asked them in a deep voice, causing Kenshin to burst out hysterical laughing.

"What the _fuck_ was that?" He asked as the light turned green.

She laughed as well. "I don't know."

He pulled into a complex where there were five stores lined up next to each other. On the end was a small store named "Riff Notes." Kenshin exclaimed in triumph when he found a spot in front of the store.

"Hell yeah, today is a _good_ day." He said as he turned off the car and got out.

"It really wouldn't have mattered if we had to walk from the other side, it's not that far." Kaoru said reasonably as they entered the store.

"Reminder numero uno: appreciate the little things in life, will you? No need to get so practical." 

"Hey, Himura! What's up?" A man with spiked hair that dyed the color of green highlighter called out from behind the counter.

Kenshin grinned. "Nothing, really, yourself?"

"Nah, same old shit."

Kenshin looked over to Kaoru then back at the green-haired man. "Uh, Masaki, this is Kaoru, Kaoru, this is Masaki."

Masaki gave a charming smile as he walked over to them. "Pleasure to meet you." He said holding out his hand. After she shook it, he gasped. "_Wait_, is _this_…_the_ Kaoru?"

She looked at Kenshin with an amused expression as he turned a delicate shade of pink. "_Yes_, what other Kaoru do I _know?_"

Masaki shrugged. "I dunno."

Kenshin rolled his eyes and Kaoru giggled. "So what're we here for?" She asked.

"I need picks…"

"Couldn't you have just gone downtown for that?"

"I could've…" a smile growing on his face.

She couldn't help but look down, his smile causing her stomach to do somersaults.

Masaki reached into his pockets and pulled out a pair of round glasses that were tinted blue. He put them on his face and grinned at the two of them. "Need anything else?"

"Yeah, don't you owe me twenty bucks? You know, so you could take that girl out for pizza?" Kenshin asked, taking a few steps toward Masaki.

"Oh…right…about that…" Masaki said slowly, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet.

With amazing speed, Kenshin plucked the blue glasses of Masaki's face. "Nice Lennon glasses you got here." He said, putting them on his own face. Turning to face Kaoru he gave her a peace sign.

She laughed. "Those look good!"

Kenshin turned around and gave Masaki a smirk. "Damn it! Fine, keep them." Masaki exclaimed.

"Nice." Kenshin said, bobbing his head. He then started walking away with a big of a drag to his step, almost as if he was stoned. "C'mon Kao, we gotta find some picks."

Kaoru shook her head at Masaki. "Gets into character." She said, pointing to Kenshin with her thumb.

Masaki smiled. "He's a good guy." He winked at her. "He likes you, a lot. So take care of him."

She bit her lip and nodded, not able to say anything.

Kenshin was on the other side of the store, looking at the vast selection of picks. She joined his side, looking at the picks with their array of colors and sizes, having no clue what the differences were.

He suddenly started humming a catchy tune to himself. She was about to ask what song that was before he gasped loudly.

"Holy shit, holy shit! Where's my phone?" He exclaimed, touching his back and front pockets before finding it in his left front pocket. Flipping it open, he pushed the record button and began humming the tune again, this time louder. After finishing, he began texting furiously. When he was done, he gave her a grin that she hadn't seen in so long – it was pure delight.

"What was that?" She asked amusedly.

"What you just heard was the chorus for the song we're playing at Battle of the Bands." He said, grabbing both her hands.

She squeezed them back tightly. "I was _just_ going to ask you what song you were singing – I thought it was from one of your miscellaneous bands."

"I just sent it to Sou who's going to send it to Sano and Yahiko. I'm going to meet them tonight just to run through it. You wanna come? See how the song develops?" 

He looked so happy that she didn't even _think_ about refusing. "_Duh_, I will! I'm so excited." She said with complete honesty.

"Me too. This song is really something, Kao, I know it." He said in a low voice, his eyes twinkling.

"I can't wait to hear it."

He froze for a moment. "Wait…no. I don't want you to hear it."

"What do you mean?" She asked, clearly hurt and confused by his sudden change.

"No, no it's nothing like that," he said quickly, reading her mind. "I just realized that I want you to be surprised, that's all. I want you to hear the polished piece – it should only be heard in its perfection. Please?"

His phone started ringing in his pocket before she could answer. He held up a finger to her before taking his phone out. Reading the text message he laughed out loud. She looked over at his phone to see Soujiro had written, "nice shades – now you r a true musician. THAT WAS AWESOME! Meet my house 4."

She smiled. "Fine, I guess I can wait a few days." 

He grinned before pulling her into a quick hug. "You're _awesome_, you know that? You won't regret it, I promise." He said as he threw the picks on the counter. 

"I'll pay for them." Kaoru said, pulling out her debit.

"Why? They're not _that_ expensive." He asked amusedly.

She shrugged. "Just to do something for you. This week doesn't just have to be about doing stuff for me, I'm not that selfish."

He felt as if he lifted a couple inches off the ground. _This week_. She was giving him an entire week. A week that would be completely out of time – the outside world wouldn't effect them. "But you're the one with the broken heart."

She snorted a little. "And yours isn't?" She asked softly.

They were silent as Masaki rung up the picks and handed her the receipt. She signed the bottom and kept the carbon copy.

Masaki waved to them as they walked to the car. When they got inside she said, "Just so you know, my heart really broke when we ended things."

Kenshin nodded. "Yeah, I guess, I mean…it _shouldn't_ be…but you know it's hard. You were a big part of my life. The whole thing was just…_sudden_ and not expected really."

She nodded, her throat getting clogged up. "Can we…not talk about this right now? Like…we can later but…not now. Let's keep it light today, my head's still hurting."

"Fine, I'll let you off the hook for now…just because you saved me some cash." He said with a small smile as he pulled out.

"Why are you scraping for money? You never have to."

"Eh, I owe Sozo twenty bucks."

"What for?"

"Well he washed my car and got me gas, so I owe him for our two trips to the diner on Thursday."

"Is Sozo coming to see the show on Friday?"

Kenshin shook his head. "Nah, school. Besides, it's not like he's going to come to all my shows or whatever. We're not going to be all, 'now we're best buddies for life!' because we're both fucked up for one reason or another…and it's not our thing."

"Of course, 'cause you're the big, strong, silent type that doesn't show his emotions involving love, especially to one for a guy."

He pushed her with his hand. "Shut up, you know what I mean."

"I know, I'm just teasing."

He side glanced to her. "You wanna go out to lunch?"

She nodded, her stomach feeling empty having not eaten since the night before. "Sure…but I wanna eat food that's _really _unhealthy. I want to eat my feelings."

He laughed, making her smile. "Okay, let's go to Ruby Tuesday, they have good burgers."

While driving to the other side of the town where Ruby Tuesday was, she couldn't help but smile when she saw a street sign that read "Ocean Avenue."

"Kenshin, we're on Ocean Avenue." She said.

His eyes widened before he snapped his fingers on one hand. "Put it on my iPod!"

She grinned as she scrolled to the bottom of his list of artists. Finding Yellowcard, she played the song "Ocean Avenue."

"Oh my God, this song was amazing." She gushed as the familiar opening began.

"Yeah, Yellowcard was awesome – that violin was so different." Kenshin said.

She smiled and shook her head. "So fun…that summer just blasting it. It's the soundtrack of summer. Whenever I hear a song from that album I just _smile_, you know? It's great."

An idea came to his mind. "Oh my God. You know what we should do?" He asked while his eyes widened behind the round, blue glasses.

"What?"

"We should totally make a playlist of all these songs. Like all the songs that define our childhood. Ranging from Backstreet Boys, Avril Lavigne, Journey, you know it. All those songs that just…you know…if you had a soundtrack for the first thirteen or fourteen years of your life, those songs would be on it."

She gasped. "_Yes!_ Okay, we're so doing that! I probably won't get any sleep searching through my old music, but it'll be so much fun. But…what's it for?"

He chuckled. She knew that laugh – it was when he knew something that he wasn't going to tell anyone about. "You'll see. But I'll give you a hint, we're gonna go on a _road trip_ tomorrow."

"Road trip to _where?_"

He smirked as he pulled into a parking spot. "You'll know tomorrow." He said before cackling.

"You're…crazy. You know that?" She said, but she was smiling as she opened the door for him.

"Nah, I think I'm pretty sane. I like to think that everyone else is crazy for being stiff, up-tight ass-faces."

* * *

After lunch, Kenshin and Kaoru began the long drive back home.

"I've come to a conclusion." Kaoru stated out of the blue.

"Conclusion about what?" Kenshin asked as he lowered the music.

"Guys are total assholes. The whole lot of them."

He paused. "You _do_ know I'm a guy, right?"

She sighed. "Yeah, but come on, they are. They're just so childish and ridiculous and _stupid_."

"That's being a little harsh – not all of them are like Enishi. I certainly don't categorize myself with him." He said with a scowl on his face.

"I swear, Kenshin, guys are _scum_. Every last one of them. I don't know what it is about a penis, but my _God_ they come with some _bad_ genes or something."

"Hey now…" He said softly, but offended. "It just seems that way now because you were dating a scumbag. Not all guys are like that."

She snorted softly. "Like you?"

"Yeah, like me." He retorted, looking her dead in the eye for a moment before focusing back on the highway. She looked at him in shock. "Kaoru, if there's one thing you should take away from our relationship…it's that I _never_ looked at another girl, understand? It was _only you_. Because that's what you deserved…what you _still_ deserve."

Kaoru froze, not being able to breathe. Why did he have to say these things? Why did he always make her feel worth more than how she felt? How could he still be hung up on her after everything she had done to him?

"You're a good guy, Ken. You've been good to me this past year…even though I didn't turn out to be the best girlfriend or ex-girlfriend…but you've always been there for me, even when you could've just told me that I set myself up for disaster with Enishi and deserve all the shit." She admitted after a few minutes of silence.

He shook his head. "Nah. I'm not that nasty. It's just at the end of the day…you seemed happier with me." He paused. "I mean, I know I couldn't fulfill certain wants of yours socially, and I know I'm a bit of a jackass and I sometimes got my words and priorities mixed up…but you seemed much more relaxed back then…and I don't if it's just me thinking this, but we were happy together."

She nodded, turning her body so she could face her window. "Yeah, we were happy…" She whispered to no one in particular.

She didn't see him smile to himself for the rest of the silent ride home.

* * *

Kenshin dropped Kaoru at his house where her car was. He ran inside the house to get her car keys and his acoustic.

"Do you wanna go out for dinner or something?" He asked as he tossed her keys to her.

"I…kind of just want to chill at your house tonight. I'll make that playlist while you rehearse." She said.

He smiled as he got inside the car. "I'll see you in a bit then."

She beamed. "Yeah, see ya."

He waved before pulling out of his driveway.

Kenshin had no idea what the week ahead was going to lead to. He didn't know if they were going to get back together, just get back to being friends, or something else entirely. All he knew was that he was going to enjoy every moment of it.

Eight-year-old Ota answered the door for Kenshin. He beamed brightly when he saw him.

"Kenny!" He exclaimed before running into him and wrapping his arms around Kenshin's thin waist.

Kenshin laughed and hugged the boy tightly. "Hey, Ota, what's up?"

"I got all the words on my spelling test right yesterday!"

Kenshin grinned fondly. Those days seemed so long ago. "That's awesome! So where's your thickheaded older brother?"

"Right here," Sano said while walking out of the kitchen with a bag of chips in hand before mouthing "bitch." He pushed Ota into the kitchen.

Kenshin's eyes immediately strayed to Sano's forehead, where a red bandana rested.

"Why are you wearing that bandana around your head?" Kenshin asked.

"Why are you wearing those glasses?" Sano retorted.

Kenshin almost forgot that he was still wearing them – he didn't feel weird in them at all.

Sano sighed. "I dunno…I was looking through my shit for something and I just found it from boy scouts or somethin'. I kind of like it." He shrugged.

Kenshin shrugged too. It strangely worked on Sano. "I stole these from Masaki as payment." Kenshin answered with a shrug before saying, "You don't look like a tool, so I suppose it's okay."

Sano lightly punched Kenshin in the shoulder before turning back inside to the basement where Soujiro was strumming his guitar. Kenshin watched Sano dial a number on his cell phone. The person being called was Yahiko.

"_I feel like shit."_ Yahiko said in a groggy voice.

"I'm sorry, Yahiko, I wish we could be with you." Soujiro called out with a frown.

"_I'll probably feel better tomorrow…"_

"What the hell did you do today?" Sano asked Kenshin.

"Did you hang out with Kaoru?" Soujiro inquired.

"_Why would he hang out with her?"_ Yahiko asked.

"Oh, yeah, last night she came to Strathmore Hall totally devastated, drank herself to oblivion, and Kenshin brought her home." Sano explained, as if it was a normal occurrence.

"_No way! What happened to her?"_

Sano and Soujiro looked to Kenshin, unsure of the answer themselves.

Kenshin sighed as his hands clenched together by his knees. "He cheated on her."

There was a tense silence until Yahiko said, _"What? I couldn't hear you."_

"That…ass-face…_cheated_ on her?" Sano asked sharply.

"_Oh my God! But he was…she was…what the _fuck?_"_ Yahiko exclaimed.

Soujiro merely shook his head. "How horrible."

Kenshin nodded. "Yeah. So…I'm hanging out with her. She totally cut off everyone, including Megumi, so she's feeling a little…lost right now."

"That's good. She can hang out with us so she doesn't get sick of you." Soujiro said with a slight tease to his voice.

"Are you joking? After the way she treated you for a year? You're just gonna let her crawl back to you?" Sano asked, his eyes narrowing.

"_Dude, the guy _cheated_ on her! Her ridiculous friends would probably force her to make up with him, _forgive_ him."_

Every muscle in Kenshin's body froze. That was the last thing he expected or _wanted_ for Kaoru to do. If she were to forgive Enishi, Kenshin wouldn't know what to do. A second chance? Since when did she believe in those? "She better not." Kenshin said out loud.

"Yeah! The dick doesn't deserve it!"

"Why would she give him a second chance? That's not very fair." Kenshin said softly.

There was another silence, but this time all three boys heard him clearly. They let Kenshin think to himself for a few minutes until Sano coughed loudly. "Alright, so you wanna play that melody? It was fucking A."

Kenshin smiled as he pulled his acoustic out of its case and tuned it. When he was done he stared down at the floor with an intense gaze. After a minute, he played the first few chords correctly, stopped, and then recorded the chords on a scrap of paper. This continued for about fifteen minutes until he managed to have the chorus memorized.

"_Kenshin – that's _so_ good. You just made me feel ten times better playing that."_ Yahiko said.

"Okay, Soujiro, let's come up with the kick ass harmony." Kenshin said, nodding to Soujiro. "Thanks, Yahiko. You better get better soon! Your part has to be sick for it to work."

"_But it sounds too good acoustic. Maybe I should –"_

"No," Kenshin said strongly. "It's one of those songs that sound good either way. Trust me, it'll work."

Soujiro smiled before looking down at the chords on the paper. His gaze turned serious as he focused on the notes. Kenshin played the chorus for him twice, and he grew to like it more the more he played it. Soujiro brought his guitar to his lap and got his hand ready by the frets. 

"Let's do it." Soujiro said.

Both counted to three before playing at the same time, both with held breath. 

"Jesus Christ, you guys _never_ get it perfect the first try." Sano breathed when they finished.

Soujiro looked to Kenshin. "You're right – this song is _it_."

"_Is it too much to say that we're gonna win?"_

Sano and Kenshin looked to Soujiro, the most down to earth and logical person in the band. Soujiro smiled before shaking his head. "No…I think we have a _really_ good shot."

Hearing that from Soujiro made Kenshin even more convinced that they were going to get some attention.

* * *

A/N: And so it begins! Thanks for being patient with this update :) I'm going to be a bit busier from now on since lacrosse has started once again! So exciting – especially since I have a protégé, this really sweet freshman girl. I swear I wish I the junior that I knew in freshmen year that was the goalie helped me…she was kind of a bitch actually…hm.

Please review!

MissGoalie


	7. Vacation: 2

A/N: Thanks for all your reviews guys – you're too cool for words :) Sorry for the delay – school and lacrosse are taking over my life.

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 2

Kaoru woke up at nine in the morning, excited for the day ahead. Despite going to bed past one in the morning, she felt so awake. She spent hours searching through her iTunes and old CDs for songs to add on their joint playlist. When she pulled out a pair of jeans she paused.

She hadn't thought about Enishi once last night. The day before, she thought that her thoughts and dreams would be plagued with him.

A thought came to mind that made her bite her lip to prevent herself from crying – Kenshin came up with the playlist on purpose.

Her phone beeped from the other side of the room. It was low battery. She was tempted to throw it out the window, but she walked over to it and plugged it into the charger, not bothering to look at the missed calls.

After dressing, her doorbell rang.

She beamed as she rushed down the stairs, completely forgetting that Kenshin was supposed to call her first. When she opened the door, however, she found a boy a couple inches taller than Kenshin with dark hair falling over one eye.

"_Sozo?_ What're you doing here?" Kaoru asked, the smile fading on her face to be replaced with a look of confusion. "I thought you were going –"

"Well…I drove back. We didn't really get a chance to talk." Sozo said, looking a little uncomfortable.

"You drove _back?_ Isn't the drive here at least four hours?" She asked incredulously.

He shrugged. "I like driving."

The two were silent for a minute until she prompted him. "Talk about…?"

He rocked on his heels and slowly let out air from his lips. "I just…well…" He looked down at his feet, a pensive expression on his face that was scarily like Kenshin's. She knew that he was formulating the words in his head so when he said them, they would be perfect.

It took about two minutes before he said, "Kenshin's a strong person. He puts up with a lot of shit. And…" he looked down at the ground before staring at her with such intensity that she wanted to cower away. Kenshin's looks were intense at times, but Sozo's were on a _completely_ different level. "I know what you're probably going to do at the end of this week…I hope you won't…but you will…and I just want you to know that it _will_ break him. Outwardly he'll take it fine…but inside he'll die, Kaoru. Just keep that in mind this week while you're with him, okay?"

She opened her mouth, closed it, and then opened it again. She had never heard him speak so much at once in so long. When she finally found her voice, she whispered, "I'll keep it in mind."

He nodded, satisfied with her answer for now. His thin fingers reached to the front pocket of his black coat, where there was a square bulge, but then he brought it back to his side and stuffed it in his pockets. "I could use a smoke." He muttered.

"You still smoke?" She asked.

He shook his head. "I stopped pot senior year…picked up cigarettes before college. But…I quit a few weeks ago. I just keep a pack for comfort, really."

"Why'd you quit?"

For a fleeting moment, he looked sheepish, something she had never seen before. "It was this girl I met at a show. We were hooking up and she told me straight up that I was the hottest guy she'd ever met, but I tasted like shit and left before we got anywhere." He smiled fondly at the memory.

She smiled. "You took that to heart? That's cute." She said with a slight tease.

He shrugged. "She was the first girl who was _completely_ honest with me. I felt like I needed to pay homage to it."

"Have you seen her since?"

"Once or twice – always at a distance." He paused for a moment before saying sharply, "Don't tell Kenshin I came here! You can tell him later in the week…just don't because he'll give me shit. Then he'll hound you and you'll give in and then he'll give me even _more_ shit…"

"Okay, gotcha."

"Okay…good. Well, peace!" He said with a small wave before turning on his heel back to his car.

She smiled at his retreating figure, only walking back into her house when she saw his car disappear.

* * *

Kenshin had been laughing for the past fifteen minutes, and saw no end in sight. He was searching through his father's stuff in his office for fun, pretending to be looking for a stapler, when he found a pair of black Ray-Ban Wayfarers that were dated back to the seventies or eighties.

"I can't believe you dad…" He muttered to himself, putting them on his face.

"Can't believe what?"

Kenshin turned around, a hand on his chest. "Jesus, dad, you think you could give me some warning? Why the hell are you so quiet?"

Hiko smirked for a moment, before recognizing the sunglasses on Kenshin's face. "Where the hell did you find those?"

Kenshin shrugged. "I was looking for a stapler." He took them off his face and examined them. There were a few small scratches on the left lens. "I never pictured you as a Wayfarer guy." He said before snickering. The thought of his father wearing them brought back his laughter.

"I didn't either. Your mom bought them for me…I never wore them in public." Hiko grumbled, clearly not enjoying being laughed at.

"Ah, she would make you do ridiculous things." Kenshin said before putting them back on. "I'm taking them hostage, hope you don't mind."

Hiko waved his hand. "Take them; they haven't seen daylight in years."

"Cool beans." Kenshin said nodding his head.

The two stood in front of each other for a few awkward moments until Hiko said, "I haven't seen Kaoru here in a while – why was she here last night?"

Kenshin found it kind of strange that Hiko would be intrusive in his business. "Why are you asking?" Kenshin asked.

Hiko raised an eyebrow at Kenshin. For the first time, Kenshin was struck by how similar the two of them were. "Just curious. I'm pleased that you're talking with her again – she was good for you."

"Yeah, well, we didn't stop talking because of me." Kenshin said with a hint of bitterness.

Hiko looked past Kenshin's shoulder for a few moments before looking into his son's violet eyes. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Kenshin asked.

"For…a lot of things."

Kenshin's eyes widened. He wasn't expecting that in the least. "It's okay…I mean…I turned out okay, I think."

"Yeah, you did."

They were silent again. Kenshin shifted from one foot to the other, thinking of something to say. "I have to pick Kaoru up – we're going on a mini road trip today. Maybe we can talk…later this week?"

Hiko nodded, visibly relieved. "Yeah, that's good. Be careful driving – the old people are out today…being Sunday and all."

Kenshin grinned. "I will."

Hiko nodded. "Okay…get out of my office – if I catch you snooping around here I'll beat you, got it?"

"Hey, I was only looking for the stapler –"

"You know where it is, idiot, in the right drawer."

Kenshin shook his head and grinned. "Right, see you." He walked past Hiko.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" Hiko asked, smirking.

Kenshin stood still for a moment before smiling – he forgot the stapler. "Yeah…" He reached into the right drawer where three staplers were. Smiling the whole way up the stairs, he felt that not only were things slowly starting to come back to normal with Kaoru being his friend again, but it was turning out to be better than before.

* * *

"Should I bring anything for this road trip?" Kaoru asked on the phone with Kenshin.

"_Uh…yeah! Make some sandwiches or something – it'll be a picnic of sorts."_

"Okay – do you still drink Cherry Vanilla Dr Pepper?"

She heard him snort on the other line. _"Please – that's not even a question. I've got that covered."_

"Alright, I'll make some Panini, what do you like in yours?"

"_The usual – I haven't really changed much, as you can see."_

"Of course." She said with a smile – she could always count on him to stay constant. "So you'll be over in fifteen?"

"_Yeah, see ya!"_

She rushed downstairs and plugged in her Panini maker, silently thanking her mother for finding it in some appliance store a few weeks ago. With a gasp she realized that she hadn't thought about her parents once. After placing Kenshin's traditional ham and cheese panino into the Panini maker, she went to the phone and dialed the number that her parents left for her.

"_Hello?" _It was her father.

"Hey, dad! What's up? How's the weather?" She asked.

"_Kaoru! Did you get our message?"_

"What message?" Kaoru asked as she pressed down on the panino.

There was a struggle for the phone on the other line until Kaoru heard her mother's voice. _"I left you a voicemail yesterday! I got worried!"_

"Oh…sorry…I was out most of the day."

"_With Enishi?"_

She gripped the phone tightly before saying calmly, "No, with Kenshin, actually."

"_Kenshin? Really? Oh, that's wonderful! I'm so glad you're getting over silly fight."_

Kaoru smiled. "Yeah, it's been good."

"_How is Enishi taking it? He doesn't really like Kenshin."_

_That's putting it very mildly_, Kaoru thought to herself. "He…doesn't know. Actually…we got into a…_really_ big fight." She lied. There was no way she was going to tell her parents that he cheated. "I'm not speaking to him right now."

"_What did he do? Did that son of a bitch say anything to you?"_ Her mother asked harshly, completely throwing her off.

"What? Well…yeah…a lot of hurtful things were said…but we're just cooling off…taking a break if you will."

"_I _knew_ he couldn't be that perfect! He was too good to be true! Didn't I say that, Koshijiro?"_

Kaoru was flabbergasted. "Are you _joking?_ I thought you liked him mom!"

"_Well…he was very polite…and he was nice…but I just always had this little voice in the back of my head saying that we shouldn't trust him completely. And look what he did! Piece of shit…"_

"Mom, please, I don't need this!" Kaoru put her head in her hand for a few minutes. "I gotta go – Kenshin and I are driving somewhere. I'll talk to you later, love you both."

She hung up and sighed. Her mood was lifted however when she took Kenshin's panino out and realized it was toasted to perfection. "Mine better be just as good or I'm killing him!"

* * *

"What the hell is with you and sunglasses now?" Kaoru asked Kenshin as she watched him get out of the car.

"I found these in my dad's office – they're pretty sick, right?"

"Straight out of _Risky Business_."

He gaped at her. "Ex_cuse_ me, but _these_ glasses have been around _way_ before Tom Cruise's bad acting came tof be!"

"Not _that_ long ago..." She muttered to herself. She walked past him to put their lunches in the backseat. "So come on, tell me where we're going." She said as she got into the passenger seat.

"We're going to a certain parking lot, that's all I'm going to say." He revealed as he started the car.

"That's…totally not that exciting. No offense, Kenshin, but I had something more spectacular in mind."

"Um, well excuse me, Kaoru, but that's not the whole trip."

"Oh? What else is involved?" She asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Okay, well it started as a dream that I've always had since I started taking driver's ed."

"A dream?" She asked, her curiosity peaked since she thought she knew every dream he ever head.

"A dream," he stated, getting on the ramp to the interstate. "The dream is that for every exit we see, we have to get off and go to a gas station."

"Kenshin, that's ridiculous!" She said, her voice rising. "There are probably one-hundred exits from here to wherever we're going! This is stupid!"

"That's not all," he replied, grinning, "We also have to take notes on each gas station. If we find a really good one, we're taking pictures."

"What qualifies as a 'really good one'?" She asked, cringing.

"The kind with top hats and t-shirts and porn DVDs and you know, the works."

"What's the point of this?" She asked, sinking lower into her seat and scowling up at him, trying to hide her smile at how ludicrous he was.

"Point? Point! Kaoru, there's such a big point to this plan that I can't even think straight!" She giggled despite herself. "First of all, we'll get, like, amazing pics." He said in a valley-girl voice, making her laugh. "Second," he started normally, "next time we make this road trip, we'll know which gas station to stop at."

"Hm, that _is_ a very good point."

"We'll also have memories. We'll get to know the managers of the stores. Where to get the pizza, where not to get the pizza."

"Most people don't get pizza from gas stations without feeling a little put off by the idea." She replied, laughing.

"Okay, little miss spoil sport, shut it."

She smiled, reaching out to turn the knob on his radio, but he put his hand on top of hers, sending a jolt through her body. He pulled her hand off of the radio and gawked at her, "Excuse me, Kaoru, but weren't _you_ the one excited to make this giganto playlist."

She nearly smashed her head on the dashboard. "You got me all crazy! I'm usually a very methodical and organized person who never forgets anything!" She exclaimed as she took her iPod out of her purse and plugged it in.

"I bring out all of you, Kaoru Kamiya. The good and the not-so-good traits." She punched him in the shoulder. "You let loose when you're with me." He answered lightly.

He was right, and she knew it. She turned on to her playlist and grinned when "It's Gonna Be Me" by 'NSYNC came on.

"Are you kidding me?" He said with an amused smile.

"Um, no, this song just happens to be my number one song to describe fourth grade."

He laughed. "Right. I always thought it was 'Absolutely' by Nine Days? Isn't that you're all-time favorite song"

Kaoru laughed. "Oh, yeah! That too! But that song just describes my _life_. I don't know – that song is just really good."

He grinned in amusement. "Yeah I was up kind of late putting on my tracks – switch my iPod into the car as soon as this horrid song is over."

"Fuck you – this is a fun song and you know it. So…" she started, and he looked over at her before quickly looking away. "You're really not going to tell me where we're going?"

"You're extra anxious today," he replied laughing. "Oh! Gas stations!" He said, veering off quickly onto the exit ramp.

"God, Kenshin! Precious cargo!" She screamed, her hand hugging her chest. He smiled at her as he parked, and smiled back at him, taking in how violet his eyes looked next to his navy shirt. For a moment, it didn't bother her that he'd almost killed her.

"C'mon," he smiled, taking his camera and getting out of the car. He walked up to the sidewalk and waited for her to join him.

For a brief moment, she was wondering what the hell she was doing. All she was doing was running away from the problems that she knew she was going to have to face come the end of the week. Eventually she would have to confront Enishi about his mistake, but the thought of him made her stomach churn. But one look at Kenshin made all the stress of the future wash away, which was why she walked toward him into the gas station without even caring about what the next moment will bring.

"Oh my God, Kaoru, look at this," Kenshin said, walking over to the middle of the store. She shook her head slightly to clear her mind.

She followed him until he stopped at a large display of sombreros. "Sombreros! Oh man."

He picked two up off of the display and plopped one down on her head, and she laughed as he put the other on his.

He grinned and pulled a camera out of his pocket, walking around the store until he finally found a middle-aged woman. "Hi ma'am, sorry to bother you, but can you take a picture of us?"

The woman looked them up and down carefully, took the camera out of his hand, and watched them as they reassembled themselves; Kaoru wrapped her arms around Kenshin's shoulders and popped her foot up while he made a peace sign to the camera, a cheesy grin on his face. The woman chuckled and took a picture, handing the camera back to Kenshin as they went to go put up the sombreros.

"Actually, I wanna wear the sombrero, it's mucho sexy." Kenshin ended the sentence in a low voice, walking over to the counter and slapping down some cash.

As Kaoru was putting up her sombrero, she caught the evil glance of the gas station manager as he rung up Kenshin's order. When Kenshin put the sombrero back on his head and walked toward Kaoru, she grabbed his wrist and whispered, "We need to go." He looked at her as she pulled him out of the gas station and got in the car, and he laughed. "That guy! He was giving me the evil eye!"

He laughed. "You're scared of the clerk at the gas station?"

She grinned, pulling out a Dr. Pepper from the backseat as he got back on the interstate.

"Okay, let's play a game." Kaoru said, lowering the volume on an old Linkin Park song.

"Alright, what game?"

"You have any paper in here?"

"Yeah, I think my Pre-Calc book is in the back…I haven't taken it out since…um…wait…" He trailed off; trying to remember the last time he took notes.

She rolled her eyes as she searched the backseat, finding it on the floor. She pulled a pen out of her purse, wrote "M-A-S-H" across the top, and grinned.

"Okay, I need four girls."

"What the hell are we playing" He asked, looking over at the paper, and bursting out laughing. "Holy shit, talk about digging up the past. Okay, put down you."

She wrote down her own name, his hand shaking a little in the process. "Okay, who else? You need two bad people and one good."

"Oh, so you immediately put yourself down as the good person? God, Kaoru, how arrogant."

She punched him. "Who else?"

"Alright, for bad people let's put Tomoe and Yuki."

"Who the fuck is Yuki?"

"Back when I took guitar lessons she was this _really_ awkward, nerdy girl who took singing lessons across from me. Her voice sucked."

She laughed. "That's so funny. How come you never told me about her? And how the hell did you know her name?"

"I asked my teacher. Why I never told you? I guess it always slipped my mind. One of those things where I'm like, 'I have to tell Kaoru about her,' and I just always managed to forget."

Kenshin found it interesting how she didn't make a comment about using Tomoe on his bad girl choice.

"Okay, last one?"

"Li."

"Who's Li?"

"Gong Li, duh." He replied, and she laughed.

"Wow, you like your older women. She's totally gorgeous though, and talented." She said, writing her name down.

"Actually, I prefer women who are just a little bit younger than me." He said, side glancing toward her.

She tried to ignore the little voice inside her head that said that she was only three months younger than him.

"Okay, four guys."

"What, in case I'm gay?" he asked teasingly. "No, but seriously, why are there four guys again?"

She laughed. "Best man at the wedding. Duh. Come on, Kenshin, it wasn't _that_ long ago."

He laughed. "Okay, put down Sou, Sano, and Yahiko…and…" He was just about to say Enishi as a horrible choice, but he caught himself, knowing that was going to be a huge mistake. "Sozo." He finally added.

"Those are all good!" She whined.

"Hey, this game can get brutal. The least you can do is let me have a decent best man to help me get through my horrible life."

She laughed and nodded. "Very true. I totally blocked out my worst MASH."

"Do you remember your best one?" He asked.

She smiled and tried to fight the blush that was creeping onto her face. "Yeah. I still have it." She admitted, looking down at her lap.

He grinned. "Wow, really?"

"Yeah, I'll show it to you later…maybe." She said.

"Awesome, I'm holding you to it." He said, pointing a finger at her.

They went through the rest of the categories: cars, number of kids, dates, pets, and few other random ones he put in to make the name officially change from MASH to "Dirty MASH." He picked the number four, and she quickly went down the list, crossing off the fourth item, smilingly slightly every time she crossed off ones she didn't want. She crossed off Tomoe's name multiple times, which caught Kenshin's attention. Finally, she pulled the list closer to her and grinned.

"Kenshin Himura, this is your future. Are you ready? Do you think you can handle this?" She asked very seriously.

He took a deep breath and clenched the wheel. "I'm ready. _Born_ ready, actually." He stated.

"You will be married to me in 2015," she looked up, trying to see his reaction, but all he did was lick his lips slightly, no expression on his face. "You will live in a house – with a balcony, of course," he rolled his eyes, "You'll own a Honda - lookie there – you'll have three kids; a turtle – we'll name him Spike – and that's all…"

"Woah, hold the phone," he started, making her laugh at the outdated phrase, "what happened to Dirty MASH?"

She them crumbled up the paper, opened the window, and threw the paper out. He gasped loudly. "_Littering!_ I can't believe you!" He exclaimed.

She laughed, her cheeks heating up despite the destruction of the evidence. There was _no_ way she was going to tell him that they were going be…sexually active…multiple times a week.

* * *

Kaoru knew where Kenshin was leading her a good ten miles before they arrived. It was right across from an all-yellow restaurant and beside a gas station – it was the parking lot where Kaoru was picked up by her parents and Kenshin the summer before ninth grade, when everything changed.

"Why here?" She whispered as he pulled into a spot in the middle of the lot.

He turned off the ignition and sighed. "Because what happened here was a pivotal moment in both of our lives. Well…at least in mine." He opened the door and got outside, sitting on the hood of his car. She quickly followed suit.

"I get that it was…since only two weeks later we had our first kiss…but…" She started before watching him slide over to his window and reach in for his iPod to plug in. Searching through his giant playlist, he clicked on one and "I've Just Seen a Face" by the Beatles came blasting on.

After a few seconds of listening she asked, "Why this song?"

He smiled as he slid back over to her side, his eyes far away. "This song was totally playing in my head when you came off that bus."

She closed her eyes and listened to John Lennon's voice. That day was etched into her memory – she had been on the bus ride from her camp for over three hours, and she wanted nothing more than to go home and shower – she had enough of living in a cabin with a rigid schedule filled with activities.

She remembered her shaking legs, anxious to get off and see her family and Kenshin – she had never been away from home for more than a week. When the door finally opened, she was the first to stand up and sprint to the front.

All eyes were on her, making her feel self-conscious. She felt gross – sweat was dripping from her forehead, her clothes were wrinkled and dirty from the morning, and her hair was most likely sticking up in different directions.

But one pair made her feel like she looked like a princess.

"It was a good day." Kenshin said, interrupting her thoughts.

Kaoru didn't realize she had a smile on her face until she opened her eyes. "Yeah, it was. Seeing you after four weeks was just…wow. So that's what they mean when they say 'you're a sight for sore eyes.' I remember thinking that when I saw you."

He grinned. "That day was _definitely_ one of the best in my life. Seriously, when my life flashes before my eyes when I'm dying, this day will definitely be highlighted."

She stared at him and was completely blown away by how carefree he looked at that moment. Her heart froze at how perfect he was with the sun shining partially behind him, his eyes sparkling.

"Don't Stop Believin'" blasted through the speakers next.

Kaoru grinned. "What is it about this song? It's so freaking _cheesy_, like, typical '80's…but it's still awesome." She looked down at her hands with a sad expression on her face. "A lot of people don't appreciate it."

He side-glanced at her. "That's not true – it's just the people that you associate yourself with."

She sighed. "Don't, Kenshin. You can't just _clump_ individuals together and stereotype them all."

"Hel_lo_, this is high school, the ultimate place of conformation."

"Yeah but _you're_ above that. You always were above conforming – all the stereotyping and whatnot. But see the interesting thing…the _weird_ thing about you is that you _allow_ yourself to be stereotyped. You're the carefree slacker who doesn't care about the future and just wants to play his guitar all day long."

He licked his lips and stared forward, not answering her. Suddenly, he jumped up to the top of his car and belted out along with Steve Perry, "_Streetlight people, living just to find emotion/Hiding, somewhere in the night,_" holding an imaginary mike.

Her breath caught in her throat. How the _hell_ could he sing like that? Then he looked down at her and held out his hand, silently asking her to come up with him. Without a second thought, she took his familiar hand and stood on top of his car, feeling a little silly.

He continued singing, nudging her to sing along with him. "Are you joking? My voice compared to yours?"

"Who the hell _cares_? Your voice isn't bad at all. Come on, it's the best part of the whole song coming up."

She opened her mouth, about to argue with him, but then the mini guitar solo came up and she couldn't help but belt out the chorus of the song along with him.

"_Don't stop believin'/ Hold onto that feeling/ Streetlight people…_"

At the end of the song she wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his arm. "When did things get so complicated?" She muttered to herself, holding back tears.

He sighed as he wrapped his arms around her. "I don't know…I think it was when mom died. But…"

"Do you wanna know the truth?" She whispered.

"What?"

"After we broke up…was when it got complicated."

He tightened his hold on her and said nothing.

* * *

"What the hell are you doing Kenshin?" Sano asked after Kaoru drove off in Kenshin's car.

Kenshin looked at Sano. "What?"

Sano shook his head, the red bandana tie in the back swinging a little. "It's not healthy – the two of you just picking up where you left off."

"We're _not_. It's just like old times – we're _friends_."

"Still – you guys have barely spoken over the past year. How are you supposed to get over her?" Sano continued as they walked down to his basement.

"I _am_ over her. I just can't get over the fact that she totally ditched everything she was for Enishi the Asshole and that whole world that he belongs in. I miss our bond." He lied with ease.

Sano shook his head. "I don't believe that anymore."

"Believe what?" Yahiko asked. He was completely healthy, although he avoided the sour cream and onion chips on the counter all the same.

"That Kenny-boy here is over Kaoru."

Soujiro looked at Kenshin. "First cut is the deepest. You two were close – I'm not surprised that you're not over her."

Kenshin gave a frustrated sigh. "Look, all I'm doing right now is helping her find herself. She's really lost right now and she needs me because, frankly, I'm the most consistent person in her life."

"I just don't want to see you get torn apart by her again. That was the worst." Sano said in a low voice.

"I'll be fine. I'm a big boy."

Sano sighed, deciding to drop the subject. "So now that we have our drummer back, we can start working on the tempo and shit."

"Yeah, I was practicing last night in between up-chucking bile." Yahiko said, getting behind the drum set.

"That's disgusting. The next time we go over to your house it better be disinfected." Soujiro said with a shudder.

Yahiko glared at Soujiro before playing a beat. Sano quickly joined in, followed by Soujiro's harmony and Kenshin's melody.

* * *

Kaoru was sitting on Kenshin's bed, feeling at ease in his comforting space. There was something about his room that completely relaxed her.

She laid back on his bed and sighed. It was more comfortable than hers. Looking up at the white ceiling, she thought of the redhead. Even though she knew him quite well, she still couldn't quite figure him completely out. She knew he was thoughtful, but even that wasn't the right word to describe him. He had an insight into people – into her – more than any other person she'd ever met. He understood her in a way that just blew her away and left her so bare in front of him.

Sighing again, she turned over to her side to look through the large window. She didn't know what was going to happen – it was all too easy to fall back into the old pattern they used to follow. And that scared her – it wasn't normal.

She flopped back onto her back. It only seemed abnormal because she was told that it was by Tomoe and other people at school. High school completely changed her outlook on things in her life.

But Kenshin had managed to slip by high school without changing one bit.

She knew she was most comfortable with him, but at the same time, she was always scared – scared of knowing he wanted more. The way he looked at her…the way he spoke to her…it sent chills up her spine.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for the delay – homework's a bitch! And lacrosse isn't really helping either (although it's great – no complaints except for one obnoxious girl…)

_This is going to seem really random, but if there are any randomly placed 'f's in this chapter, I apologize - I have no idea why they're there...and I tried to get rid of them, but it just became a pain in the ass the search for them._

Please review! It makes me happy when I come back from a miserable day at school haha

MissGoalie


	8. Vacation: 3

A/N: It was spring break when I wrote this! Haha what a coincidence :)

By the way, you do know that the dates in this story coincide with last year's actual calendar, right? I just wanted to point that out because the movie that K&K are going to see in this chapter actually came out that weekend.

_Note: If they're any random f's in this chapter again, I apologize - it's definitely fanfiction's fault - I tried to get rid of them, but I'm human._

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 3

Kaoru was more than surprised when she found herself face-to-face with Misao on Monday morning.

The doorbell and rung, and she assumed it was Kenshin, but for the second time in two days, she was wrong.

"You haven't called me back. How are you?" Misao asked with her arms crossed.

"I turned my phone off…I'm being a hermit."

Misao snorted. "Liar. You're hanging with Himura." Kaoru looked down at her feet. Misao sighed. "I was worried. I _am_ worried. Megumi and Enishi are too – they keep calling me."

"Why you?"

"Because they assumed that you would be with me, I guess. I don't know."

"Did you tell them that I'm with Kenshin?"

"No, I'm sure one of them will figure it out eventually. I'm not about to make it easy for them." Misao answered with a grimace.

"Why not? If you say they're as worried as you, then why don't you reassure them?" Kaoru challenged. "Not that I really give a shit about Enishi at the moment – you can make him worry. But why not tell Megumi?"

Misao looked into Kaoru's eyes with boldness. "Because as childish as this sounds, she took away my best friend, and since she holds my old title of Best Friend, I would expect her to go to be with you immediately after you withdrew from the real world."

Kaoru was completely taken aback by her response. "Megumi's not my number one best friend, Misao."

Misao barked a laugh, tears in her eyes. "Oh yeah? Then why do you hang with her all the time and block me out? I got _shafted_, Kaoru, and you know it."

Kaoru bit her lip and looked away. It was true – she knew that she distanced herself away from Misao.

"You know, I wasn't the only one that got shafted and was hurt by it." Misao said in a low voice.

Kaoru swallowed. "Break ups are supposed to hurt."

"Are they supposed to break and change people too? Because when I broke up with Shoji two years ago I don't think I changed very much. And I don't think I cried as much as you did." Misao shook her head. "I don't know why you did it, but that was probably the _dumbest_ thing you've ever done."

"Don't you _dare_ judge me; you don't know the half of it!" Kaoru yelled. "Is that why you came here? To insult me and make me feel worse than I already do?"

"No, I just want you to realize you two had…_still_ have…a deep and complex relationship that couldn't be severed by a stupid break up. I hope you know that now."

"Of course I knew that, silly Misao." Kaoru whispered. "Why else did I go to him after catching Enishi?"

This time Misao looked away. "I also want you to know that it really _sucks_ not being as close as we used to be."

Kaoru brought Misao into a tight hug. "I'm…_so_…sorry. But if it makes you feel any better…I haven't laughed nearly as much this year…and I think it was because of not hanging out with you."

"That does make me feel a little better." Misao mumbled, making Kaoru giggle.

Kaoru pulled away. "Just so you know…Megumi _is_ a good friend too. I'm gonna try balancing out my life more. I think this year _sucked_ in balancing my old relationships with the new."

"True dat, homie." Kaoru laughed and pushed Misao away. "So what're you doing with Kenshin today?"

Kaoru shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know – it's a surprise everyday with that kid."

Misao smiled. "You know he wouldn't be going through all this shit with just anyone, right?"

Kaoru sighed. "Don't start, we're just _friends_."

Misao looked as if she wanted to say something, her lips parted for a moment but then she closed them and shook her head. "Okay, Kaoru." She said in a tone that clearly showed that she didn't believe her. She flipped open her cell phone and her eyes bugged out. "Shit! I gotta go – I'm meeting _Aoshi_ for lunch."

"Wait…_Aoshi_? _The_ Aoshi? From Urban Center?!" Kaoru asked incredulously.

Misao beamed, and it was different from every other grin Kaoru had ever seen – there was something special about this guy. "Yeah! We were talking on Friday and we just _clicked_."

"Are you sure we're talking about the same Aoshi? He doesn't talk."

Misao scoffed. "Of _course_ he does – he just tends to keep to himself."

"You do most of the talking."

"…True. But he does contribute!"

Kaoru smiled. "That's awesome – I'm really happy for you. Have fun with him – and you _have_ to call me and tell me how it went – give me all the details."

Misao's eyes sparkled, her grin still on her face. "I sure as _hell_ will! Ciao!" She skipped away toward her car and honked as she drove away.

The smile on Kaoru's face faded as she shut the front door. She rested her head on it, thinking about Misao's expression – it reminded her of when she went on her first date with Kenshin. She distinctly remembered looking in the mirror in her bathroom before going downstairs to meet him – flushed cheeks, smile that reached her eyes, making them crinkle. Come to think of it, she hadn't smiled like that in a long time.

* * *

Kenshin had spent a good hour or so at the school setting up his and Kaoru's next activity. There was one thing that he truly appreciated being a Himura for was the ability to keep things organized, which included the garage, making it really easy to find what he needed.

When his parents were celebrating one of their wedding anniversaries, he vaguely remembered his mother wanting to play the wedding tape outside on a warm July night. He remembered Hiko buying a screen and setting it up with a projector in the backyard.

Nobody had touched them since.

But that morning Kenshin decided that it was time to pull it out. It took quite a while for him to figure everything out, but he was very pleased with himself when he finished. He drove straight from the school to her house. When he knocked he heard her yelp from the other side of the door. When she opened the door a second later, he quirked an eyebrow at her.

"Care to explain why you were right by the door?" He asked, making her flush. "Were you so excited for today that you slept in front of the door or something?"

She cracked a smile. "No…" She was about to tell him about Misao's visit, but she could tell he was holding back his immense excitement and decided to relieve him. "What're you so excited about?"

"Okay, come with me." Kenshin said with his eagerness fully apparent on his face. She stared at him with confusion until he grabbed her hand and ran over to _her_ car. "I'm glad you put the top down in your car – I was setting it up this morning and I don't know how long we can have it up for."

"What the hell did you do?"

"Let's go! Drive to the school parking lot by the east entrance!" He said.

"Okay, I'll give you a hint. You've seen _Grease_…right?"

"Duh, who hasn't?" She replied while rolling her eyes.

"Alright, then what's the place where everyone thinks that Rizzo is pregnant?"

She thought for a moment before exclaiming, "At the drive-in!" while clapping her hands with glee as they got in the car. "A drive-in! I've never been to one before! I've always wanted to."

"I know." He said with a knowing smirk on his face.

She then turned to him with a serious expression, although he could tell she was hiding her amusement. "You're not going to get me pregnant, are you?"

His eyes went wide, and much to his complete embarrassment, he turned a little pink. "Woah! _Kaoru_, how inappropriate!" He said in a motherly tone, which made her laugh.

When they got to the parking lot she gasped. "Are you _kidding_? _Kenshin_, you did this? How?"

He gave her a mysterious smile. "I'm magical."

She snorted. "What're we watching?"

"Ladies and gentlemen, tonight's showing will be the 1999 film _The Matrix_ starring Keanu Reeves. This sci-fi thriller will run 136 minutes. We ask that you please turn off all cellular devices and babies and refrain from shouting across the theatre. Please keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle at all times."

She smiled, crossed her legs, and looked at him. "Did you plan on this irony – watching a science-related movie on the English-History side of the school?"

"Surprisingly, no, I didn't. Although I love my daily dose of irony, I didn't realize it until I just said this movie was a sci-fi thriller."

"Alright, we can't watch a movie without popcorn. Please tell me you came prepared, Himura."

He grinned as he reached over the edge of her car to a shopping bag that was beside the projector. She silently admired his ass for a few moments before shaking her head as he sat back down. "Alrightay, I have _caramel_ popcorn drizzled in delicious milk chocolate – a good comfort food."

She sighed. "You know me too well," she said as she took the large tub from his hands.

"I also have Dr. Pepper, duh, and some assorted candies which include Sour Patch Kids and M&Ms."

She snorted. "Only you can have Sour Patch Kids this early in the morning."

He opened the bag and snickered. "I love Sour Patch Kids." He then reached into the tub of popcorn in her lap and stuffed his face. "And I love caramel popcorn."

She laughed as she popped a kernel in her mouth, unintentionally smiling at the deliciousness. "Yum, amazing goodness." She paused for a moment before saying, "I haven't seen this movie in _years_, why this one?"

"Because it's a kick ass movie that really makes you think. Now shhh, it's starting."

They looked at the wall and saw black along with a flashing green bar. After a few moments of listening to dialogue Kaoru said, "That sounds really sketchy: 'You like him, don't you? You like watching him.' What a sleazebag."

He snorted. "Do you remember this movie at all?"

"Well yeah, he's the bad guy – he betrays them all, right? Cyborg!"

He burst out laughing. "Cy_pher_."

She waved her hand dismissively. "Whatevs."

His smile faded at the use of that word just put a finger to his lip, signaling her to stop talking. She picked that up from spending the past year with people like Tomoe and Megumi, the thought making his stomach churn.

They watched silently for a while until they saw Neo pull out a dated cell phone from a package. "Wow, can you _believe_ how _primitive_ that looks? Seriously, now cell phones are thinner than a deck of cards! Crazy!" She pointed out as she took out another handful of popcorn.

Kenshin turned and shot her a look, making her pout, sinking back into her seat. Her outbursts became more and more frequent as the movie went on – during one scene in the beginning when Neo was debating with himself to go out to the scaffold. "Do it! Do it _now_!" She urged.

He sighed. "You've _seen_ this movie _before_. Are you sure you remember this at all?"

She shot him a glare. "I forget these things! I've seen a million movies from the last time I've seen this, which I think was with you as well."

Later during the scene where Cypher (Kaoru still called him Cyborg) had gotten out of the Matrix and was on the phone with Trinity unplugging people, Kaoru leaned into Kenshin and whispered, "Who's going to stop him?! He can't kill _the One_. What's going to happen?"

He leaned back into his seat, a little frustrated and whispered back, "Why don't we watch and find out together?"

She immediately closed her mouth and he watched her withdraw into herself. He supposed he was a bit harsh – after all hearing her say things that would've made her cringe over a year ago made him pissed. But then he remembered that she was with him now, she chose to stay with him this vacation for a reason, which was why when Tank had killed Cypher he exclaimed, "_Yeah!_ What a _BAMF_!"

She nodded. "Yeah, that was pretty bad ass."

Later in the movie when Morpheus was running toward the helicopter where Neo and Trinity were, Kenshin and Kaoru both screamed, "GO, RUN! FASTER!" before cracking up with laughter.

Near the end of the movie when Trinity proclaimed her love for Neo, Kenshin scoffed. "This ruins it."

"What, why?" She blurted. "Is this some kind of macho thing where 'love has to be in every movie' kind of thing?"

"No, it's just…it could've been done better."

"How?"

"Like…it didn't need to be so…so _cliché_."

She gave an exasperated sigh. "Well what did you expect? Not all actors can correctly portray the Look of Love, you know? Besides, this movie is basically every geek's fantasy – the hot chick in leather admitting her love and bringing the hero back to life. Of course for people like you and I it sounds ridiculous and beyond cliché, but that's because we've actually had experience in that field."

He shook his head. "Saying 'I love you' isn't necessarily the most meaningful way to express your feelings."

"But it's the most obvious and straightforward." She retorted.

This time it was Kenshin's turn to close his mouth and withdraw – he had nothing to say.

As the closing credits rolled, Kenshin decided to push that conversation to the back of his mind to contemplate on later and reached over the side of the car again to bring up four movies. "What should our second movie be?"

"Oh, we're having a movie marathon?" She grinned, pulling her legs up to sit cross-legged on the seat. "Let's see them!"

"We've got these shitty movies and of course, my favorite, _Harold and Maude_."

The smile on her face faded a moment as she looked at the last movie. She knew he wanted to watch that one; it was obvious the way he threw the other three movies at his feet. She sighed. "_Fine_. We'll watch _Harold and Maude_."

He grimaced. "I thought you like this movie."

She sighed. "I do like it…a lot actually…but…I don't know…it kind of depresses me."

"It's not supposed to – it's supposed to make you happy…_lighter_, almost."

"Yes, I know…but just the ending and it's just so sad."

He sighed as he put the movie in. "Yes, it shows how sad life can be…but it also shows that what the dead teach us through living is enough to help you through that time of sadness…so you can be happy."

He lived by that movie, she knew that. Surviving his mother's death had largely to do with watching _Harold and Maude_, what she'd like to think of as her constant support, and playing the guitar. Because if there was one thing that he desired the most after her death was consistency.

That was the worst part about breaking up with him – she knew she was shaking his world, giving him unnecessary disturbances in his life.

But when they were halfway through the movie she suddenly realized that it wasn't just the fact that she ruined the perfect balance in his life, she also ruined hers – she messed up and made poor decisions after distancing herself from him.

* * *

After they had finished packing all the equipment in the back of her car, Kenshin offered to take her to a movie.

"Ugh, I don't know, we already watched two. Could you really go for another?" She groaned.

"Today is Movie Day, I have decided. We have to go to the movies. _Disturbia_ just came out – let's go to that."

"Oh God, Ken, you know how I get at these kind of movies."

He grinned mischievously. "I know."

She glared at him. "I can't believe you – so immature."

He laughed out loud. "Come on, I'm teasing. But just so you know, my arm will be ready for your abuse."

She didn't say anything, at first not agreeing to go to the movies. But when she got on the highway, she couldn't help but watch that beautifully slow smile adjourn his face.

When they parked in the lot, Kenshin urged her to stick the tub of caramel popcorn in a large tote bag that she surprisingly had in the back seat of her car.

"Are you kidding? That's _so_ obvious!" She chided him.

"Come on! Why waste money on disgusting buttered popcorn when we have the goods already?" She laughed. "Come on, live a little! If they check, then who cares, we'll put them back in the car…make them hold it behind the counter, whatever."

Sighing, she stuffed the tub into the bag. "I'll look like a freak, but whatever, who cares, right?"

He grinned. "Exactly."

They fought over who would buy the tickets, and eventually Kaoru won by flipping a coin. Kenshin was overly traditional in the sense that he had to pay for everything, but she had to constantly remind him that it was a completely different century and women could pay for their own things too.

The theatre was moderately empty, given it was lunch time.

"See, I _told_ you it would be fine." He said, referring to the popcorn in the bag.

"Yeah, but we got some _weird_ looks."

He snorted. "Whatever. Now we can enjoy some more delicious popcorn."

"I'm going to be fat by the end of the day."

"Technically that's not possible –"

She nudged him. "Shut up. I haven't eaten anything today except caramel popcorn – that's pretty disgusting."

He shrugged. "It's a good comfort food. You'll stop eating when you realize that you don't need it."

At that moment the lights began to dim, signaling the beginning of the string of previews, one which included something involving Mars and a couple of seconds of recording. Judging by everyone's faces, it seemed pretty interesting. However, everyone laughed as the title was completed, reading "Transformers."

"How retarded, I can't believe they're making that movie. Seriously, the movie industry is just _desperate_ now." An obnoxious guy in front of them whispered.

Kenshin shook his head. "It's going to be good." He stated with confidence.

"How do you know? It probably _will _suck." She said, having been guilty of laughing along with everyone else.

"That's what they said about _Raiders of the Lost Ark._" He shook his head. "It's going to shock people – it'll be good."

She smiled. "Okay – we'll go see it together when it comes out."

"Done." He reached a hand into her popcorn and stuffed it in his mouth. She giggled at him. "Wha sa funnah?" He asked with a mouth full of popcorn.

"You're just…" She shook her head, not quite sure what she was going to say.

There was no one word to properly define him.

Throughout the movie, Kaoru did abuse his arm by grabbing it multiple times. The first time, however, she grabbed his hand, which she used to do when they were going out. But when she turned to look at his face, seeing that all-too familiar little smirk, she released him and grabbed his arm for the duration of the movie.

At the end of _Disturbia_, the two were quiet as people rushed past them.

"That…was _weird_. Flashback, right?" Kenshin said, trying to smile, but he couldn't quite manage to.

"Yeah…" Kaoru trailed off, unable to look at him.

The idea that a film could exactly portray an event that happened two years ago was beyond her – everything from the wacky best friend filming the couple to the middle finger given to the camera. It was too close for comfort.

No words were spoken until they had gotten back in the boundaries of town.

"Can we talk about us for a second?" She blurted, forcing herself to keep her eyes solely on the road.

"Uh, yeah, what about _us_?" He asked with a half smile, feeling his pulse quicken a little despite his mind's protests.

"I mean…the way it kind of fell apart."

The smile on his face dropped. "Way to damper the mood."

"Hey! I'm trying to be _serious_ here. In case you don't know, you're supposed to have _serious_ conversations with people. It's not all about laughs and fun." She said with a glare.

"So am I! Kaoru, do you really think that we could figure everything out by just sitting in this car talking? Hell, we would need to be in an isolated room with endless amounts of time. We can't possibly talk about what happened."

"And why not? I want to set it all straight. What's wrong with that?"

He gave a frustrated sigh. "Just...damn it, Kaoru! We've been through _so_ much shit together! Good and bad – hell, I was the first person to know that you got your per –"

She gasped as her face turned a pretty shade of pink. "I told you to _never_ mention that day again!"

"Before your own _mother!_ What was her reaction, by the way? When she saw my sweatshirt covering that stain?"

Her scowl turned very ugly. "That's not fair. I was a desperate sixth grader…I was too embarrassed to go to the nurse."

His gaze softened. "In protecting your dignity I got the flu."

She bit her lip guiltily. "Yeah…but how was I supposed to know you were going to miss the bus?"

"And how were you supposed to know it was going to be one of the coldest days of the year?" He smiled at her, the smile that made her heart melt every time. "Look, all I'm saying is that we were each others' first for a lot of things. We're really important to each other…even though we're not together and sometimes we go weeks without speaking, we still think about each other often. We can't forget how much we were in each other's lives."

"I know."

"You do?" He asked, not really sure that she did know.

"Yeah, of course. I'm not an idiot, Kenshin. My feelings when I broke up with you were real. It was hard. Actually…it was one of the hardest things I ever had to do." She said the last part quietly, almost hoping that he wouldn't be able to hear her.

"Then why did you do it?"

She remained silent, gathering her jumbled thoughts together. "It was a lot of things, Ken."

"I know the student government was behind it, Tomoe and all, but why did you give into it?"

She ran her tongue over her front teeth to the back of her molars while avoiding his gaze. Although she knew he would be able to read her like always, she still thought that maybe there was a possibility that he wouldn't know her complex reasons for leaving him.

He snorted with a humorless laugh. "Of course." He shook his head at the obviousness.

"What."

"Kaoru Kamiya, _president_ of the student government. It does have a nice ring to it."

"It wasn't just that."

"Ah, but it was a huge reason – Tomoe told you to dump me and you would be the top candidate for presidency by junior year. I was holding you back – I did nothing for the school community and it would only bring your image down. But, if you had a boyfriend, say, like _Enishi_, you would be an absolute shoe-in."

Her eyes widened. What he said was almost verbatim to what Tomoe had told her.

"Mmm, I hit the nail on the head, didn't I?" He shifted in his seat a little. "Well, it was obvious that we weren't having any problems. It was always smooth sailing for us. I don't think we ever got into a huge fight. Even our break up wasn't a fight – can you believe that? Not only were we best friends, but we dated for over a year and never fought about anything beyond what we were going to order in for dinner or what movie to watch."

"Yeah…we were really content…weren't we?"

"Not only that, but we had _crazy_ _fun_. We always laughed, danced, sang. It was great…it was what life is supposed to be about."

She didn't say anything for a moment. "Life is serious too, Kenshin. It's not all about having fun. You have to do things you don't want to do…it's all part of growing up."

"I think I've had enough serious in my life, don't you think?" He said quietly.

"It's _hard_ losing someone, but you can't just completely give up on a solid future just because you had no parental guidance for a while. You're _really_ smart. It's innate. You have so much potential."

"And the things we learn in school are important, how? Who _cares_ about functions and radians and transformations?"

"_Kenshin!_ You _need_ good grades in order to get a good job! How else could you support anyone, let alone yourself?" She exclaimed.

"I'm not going to work in a law firm like Yukishiro. I already know what I'm doing, and it doesn't involve school."

"The odds of First Absolute getting big are _minimal_."

"Oh, so now you're an expert in statistics? Have a bit of faith, Kaoru. Besides, we're good, and you know it." The last part was not meant to sound obnoxious or arrogant; it was merely a statement of fact. He knew there was no point in being humble in that sort of business – their band was good and had what it takes.

"Yes, you're _really_ talented, but a lot of _really_ talented people don't make it."

He looked up at the sky with a carefree expression on his face. "Playing my guitar and singing my lyrics are what I've always wanted to do. Those two things make me very happy…and you should do what makes you happy. You don't want a miserable job…every job that's out there will make me miserable…except maybe teaching kids how to play the guitar…opening the doors to the young would be very satisfying."

She shook her head, wondering why she had ever decided to argue with him on this subject – this was the lifestyle he leaned on – without it, he wouldn't be the Kenshin she had fallen for years ago.

She gave a small smile as she pulled into his driveway. "Everyone should take after you."

He smiled back. "No, everyone should take after Maude."

She suddenly grinned. "'You have to _reach_ out. Take a _chance_. Get _hurt_ even. But play as well as you can.'" She quoted.

"'Go team, go!'" He continued, grinning.

"'Give me an L!'" She pumped a fist in the air, laughing.

"'Give me an I!'" He pumped his own first in the air as well.

"'Give me a V!'"

"'Give me an E.'"

"'L-I-V-E, LIVE!'" They both exclaimed at the same time before laughing.

"'Otherwise, you got nothing to talk about in the locker room.'" She finished, still smiling.

He smiled at her warmly. "I was wondering when that smile was going to come through. It's there…just hidden."

"What smile?" She asked curiously, turning a little pink against her will.

"The one I used to see all the time – that carefree one where you squint your eyes because your smile is just so dazzling."

The smile completely faded from her face. "Kenshin…" She said warningly.

"I'm being honest here. There's no reason to fake anything. I can't fake how I view you…or my feelings. Maybe you should really be honest with yourself and with others."

She unlocked the doors. "I think that's enough for today." She said.

He nodded before stepping out of the car to get his projector. She reached over to grab the bag which held the caramel popcorn.

"Oh, no, you keep that. I think you're still gonna be eating that." He said as he shut the back door.

"Uh, I don't think so – I've eaten half this tub already – I have to be a _complete_ pig to finish this off."

He shrugged. "Comfort food, Kao, doesn't have a proper serving size – it's all relative. See you tomorrow."

She closed her mouth, the sensible part of her brain wanting to say, "No, Kenshin, we can't keep seeing each other like this because old feelings are just going to resurface and I might do something that I'll regret." But the less sensible side took over and said out loud, "Yeah, but this time, _please_ let me sleep in – it's _vacation_ for Christ's sake!"

He grinned. "Yeah, no problemo, chica. Hasta!" He said with a wave before walking into the garage, leaving her to sit in her car for a few moments to think about everything.

She opened the tub of popcorn and began eating again. However, when she thought about tomorrow and the endless possibilities, she put the lid back on. She didn't need it anymore.

* * *

A/N: Uh, yeah, sorry that this took a bajillion years to get out. You know, school, lacrosse, the usual. I thought vacation would totally relax me…yeah, right. I played lacrosse ALL break. I didn't even sleep in! It was ridiculous – especially since I ended up catching a really bad cold (I have a box of tissues by me as I write this)

Please review! It'll make me feel loads better :)

MissGoalie


	9. Vacation: 4

A/N: SORRY! I hope you enjoy this chapter…it took FOREVER to get out.

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 4

"I want to visit Grandma today."

There was silence on the other end of the line until Kenshin said, _"I'll come with you."_

"You don't have to – it's depressing."

"_Exactly."_

She slowly glared into the phone. "I'm not weak, you know. Just because I cry once in front of you automatically assume that I can't handle it."

"_No, quite the opposite. I think you're too strong. I'm coming for two reasons: one, because I miss your grandma and I wanna see her. Second,"_ she could hear the smile in his tone, _"to be a support – those rehab centers aren't pretty."_

"I know that! I've visited her before."f

She heard him sigh. _"I'm coming and I'll be at your house in an hour. _So!_ Wanna hear my morning?"_

This time she sighed. "What happened?"

"_Well, I was walking down the street with the guys, we were going out for brunch, and then I get distracted by that weird store – you know – in between Tiffany's and that bar. And I found…the _sickest_ pair of Oakley sunglasses. X-Metal Mars? Used to be four hundred bucks, yeah?"_

"Okay…" She never heard of that specific line, but she was familiar with Oakley – Tomoe had a cute pair of sunglasses of that brand.

"_It was discontinued for one reason or another. Well, in this store…whatever it is…I found them…for _fifty bucks._"_

She raised her eyebrows. "Wow, that's a bargain!"

"_Seriously, Yahiko was shitting in his pants, it was fantastic."_

"Well aren't you lucky."

He sighed dreamily on the other line. _"Oakley X-Metal Mars with leather accents and Gold Iridium lenses._ _Supreme art."_

"Wow, I'm excited to see them."

He snorted. _"Bullshit, you're not."_

She laughed. "Okay, it's not the most _exciting_ thing for me, but it's still cool to hear that you got such a deal on something that rare."

"_When you see me it will be exciting for you because I look sexy."_

She burst out laughing. "Okay, Ken, we'll see. So you're picking me up in an hour?"

"_Yes, I am. And bring your iPod! We're gonna listen to more of that sweet oldies playlist. You know, embarrass ourselves even more."_

"Sure, I've wanted to get down to some Backstreet Boys."

"_Yeah, well, I've been wanting to listen to some old school Blink lately."_

She gasped. "Oh my God! That was the best. That'll be the first band we listen to."

"_Well call me when you want to leave – I think I'm gonna stop by Sou's house to work on our parts. The harmony is _key_ for this song. You know how a harmony can totally make a song? Well this is it. So just give me a call."_ With that he hung up.

She had a very vivid flashback to when they were going out, toward the end of their relationship and it left a bitter aftertaste in her mouth.

* * *

Two hours later she heard a knock on the door. She was surprised to find it was Kenshin. Although she would die than rather admit it, he did look kind of sexy in those sunglasses.

"You didn't call me." He said with his hands in his pockets.

She shrugged. "Sorry, I was busy watching a movie." _Lie_.

He narrowed his eyes for a moment before shaking his head. She sighed – would he _ever_ figure it out? "That song better be damn amazing." She added.

He beamed, making her heart skip a beat. "Trust me."

The sad thing was, she did trust him, with everything. "You know, if I was given the option to share a really big secret with only one person, it'd probably be you."

"Wait…that's really random…" he said, cocking his head to the side in confusion.

"Well, when you said to trust you…it's just…I do. Inexplicably."

He grinned. "Really, now?"

She sighed. "Don't get cocky."

"No, I'm just…happy that you said that. Because you could've told me anything…even while you were still going out with that asshole."

"Really?" She asked while shutting the door behind her. "No questions asked?"

"Uh…no. Honestly? I would be very curious and ask plenty of questions. Especially if you came to me a month ago."

She froze in front of his car before looking to him. "I'm sorry. About ignoring you in the hallways for a while."

He shook his head and held his hands up. "No I get it, you totally wanted to rip me out of your life. It's just unfortunate that it kind of ripped me apart a little each time you did it."

She bit her bottom lip. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it. I'll find a way for you to pay me back, somehow," he said with a mischievous smile growing on his face.

"I have no doubt you will." She said dryly as she opened the door to his car. In the corner of her eye she saw his guitar propped against the backseat.

He noticed her staring at it. "For your grandma – she's going to be the first person to hear the song."

As ludicrous as it was, she felt a mixture of hurt and jealousy. But as soon as she coined her emotions, she immediately felt weird. He saw the flashes of emotion play across her face and said, "I know she'll be frank with me. The guys think it's good, but I think it'll be good to hear and outside perspective."

Her face didn't change. She always used to be the first person outside the band to hear the new songs, at least before the past year. Although he said he wanted it to be a surprise, why would he immediately share it with her grandma? But looking back on the past year and the way she treated him, she supposed that she could wait a bit longer.

She smiled at him. "She'll be brutal with you. I remember when I still played the violin in middle school, she told me to either burn it, or practice down the road so she couldn't hear it."

"Aw! Grandma Yuki…" He laughed as he pulled out the driveway.

"Well, I did suck as a violinist – you can't deny that."

He didn't say anything, but his face said it all.

"Even _you_ can't deny it, Kenshin, don't be political." She laughed.

"Fine, fine, you weren't…the _best_…violinist in the world. But that doesn't mean you're musically challenged. If I can remember clearly, your voice is quite pleasurable. Soft, but good."

She blushed at the comment. "It's nothing compared to yours."

He shrugged. "I don't think my voice carries the band."

Her eyes bugged out. "Are you _kidding_, Kenshin?"

"I think it's more of the guitar riffs, the harmonizing, the beat. Everyone carries it." She gave him a sharp look. "Although…I can't deny that the lyrics make it too." He added slowly.

She sighed. "I mean, I haven't seen any of your new stuff…or really anything from the past year, but from what I remember, your lyrics were awesome."

He had a sheepish expression on his face. "Well, looking back on some of my eighth grade stuff makes me cringe…but there are some good one-liners that I honestly don't know how I even came up with."

They fell into a silence for a few minutes before he said, "all the same, I like it when you sing. Like when we were singing that Journey song on top of my car – you were free. There wasn't anything holding you back. That's why I'm so partial to hearing your voice." He took a breath. "Despite your inability to hit certain high notes, you mouth the words at that point, and the way your voice fades out when you hit a certain low note, it's one of the most amazing things to hear. For me, at least."

She closed her eyes. "_God_, Kenshin. How do you _do_ that?"

"Do what?" He asked innocently.

"Just…you say the most amazing things. Does your English teacher want to have your babies or something?"

He laughed. "Actually, I think she does. She thinks I'm one of the most talented writers she's ever had."

She shook her head. "Unbelievable."

For a few minutes they said nothing to each other. Kenshin broke the silence when he looked over at her and saw something very familiar around her neck.

He smiled. "You're wearing your grandpa's necklace."

She touched it unconsciously. "Yeah…I have a soft spot for it."

"I didn't like the gold. No offense, Kao, but I prefer you in silver. The gold wasn't you – it was too obnoxious."

She nodded. "Yeah, it's not really my thing. But it was so thoughtful and…I couldn't just give it back."

"I can give it back for you, ya know, shove it up his ass or something to that effect." He said offhandedly.

She tried to hold back a laugh, but she was unsuccessful. "I shouldn't laugh."

"Would you rather laugh or cry about it?" He asked her seriously.

She paused, thinking of that Friday night. "No, it's the last thing I want to do."

He sighed. "It's okay to cry about it."

She snorted. "This is coming from someone that has _never_ cried until five days ago – suddenly you're the expert on when it's _okay _or not?"

"I'm a weird case." He said dismissively. "_I'm_ fucked up. _You_, my dear, are not. And don't say that Friday counts. I mean, it does, but that was just a drunken mess. As my brother said, you need to let it all out – gut-wrenching sobs with snot and all."

She laughed. "He would say that…but if there's one person I can't imagine crying it's him."

Kenshin looked thoughtful for a moment. "Yeah…but he can. He has. It's…like…this is going to sound so weird and _wrong_…but it's like watching a fallen angel cry." He shook his head, almost as if physically getting rid of the thought. She noticed patches of pink on his cheeks.

"Poetically true, I bet. Get off the next exit and then you're going to make a right off the ramp."

He nodded as he turned up the volume on a Blink-182 song and started singing the words. Very loudly. After hearing the chorus once, she quickly remembered the rest of the lyrics and sung along with him.

She almost felt ashamed – that she couldn't remember the lyrics to what used to have been one of her favorite songs when she was younger. And she knew he noticed – it made her want to bash his head against the steering wheel.

"Why do you look like you're about to kill?" He asked cautiously.

She let out a breath. "Could you just _stop_ being so _in tune_ to me? It's like you're always watching me."

He shrugged. "Sorry, can't help it. I'm programmed that way – it hasn't changed. Don't tell me you're not in tune with me anymore."

"I don't know. Was I ever? You're a hard person to read."

He shook his head. "I don't think so. With other people, yes, I tend to hide my feelings. But with you? Never. I lay almost everything for you."

"Almost?"

"I'm allowed certain privacies."

"So am I, now stop sneaking glances – I'm not going anywhere." At her response he turned the slightest shade of pink. "Ah! That's it! You're afraid that I'm gonna disappear!" She burst into giggles while he turned redder.

"Well, sor_ry_ that I'm still a bit in shock that two weeks ago you barely gave me the time of day and now you're laughing next to me like in the old days."

She stopped laughing. "It is a bit weird, isn't it?" She said after a minute of silence.

"There's a reason why we grew inexplicably closer to each other as the months wore by."

She nodded. She did notice that – after the first five months of painful avoidances, they slowly began to nod at each other in the hallways, which soon transformed to smiles and waves, and before she knew it they were making small conversation. It wasn't until the week before that she actually wanted to be directly involved in his life. Was that selfish of her?

"How come you never found anyone to date? You never even _tried_." She asked with a bit of desperation.

He shrugged, a sad smile on his face. "Not ready. You're belittling the damage you made on my ability to begin relationships with other girls."

"Oh, so that's _my_ fault?" She asked angrily.

"Yes," he stated simply yet strongly, "because you suddenly pulled the carpet from under my feet, left me so completely _abandoned_ and _confused_ that I _never_ wanted to go through that again." He sighed. "Look, I'll admit that _maybe_ I didn't put myself out there very often. And maybe I let the wounds fester more than I should've…but you were my first. First cut is the deepest and all that."

She didn't say anything to that – how could she? He was baring himself in one moment than he ever did willingly in his life. She didn't count the time when he cried in his arms – his brother brought that out of him. This was voluntary revealing.

So both didn't talk for the rest of the way.

* * *

Kenshin hadn't been to a rehabilitation center before, but it was very much like a hospital. When they first walked in, Kaoru gave her name, her relation to Grandma Yuki and they both got visitor stickers.

The first thing he saw beyond the main desk was a cafeteria was a lot of old people, but some young, were sitting around. There were some families visiting, but for the most part old people and their "buddies" were congregated.

"Grandma should be in one of the private rooms. Apparently they're doing hangman or something."

Kenshin snorted as he followed her. A few rooms down he heard various people shouting out different letters. Kaoru opened the door and found a group of seven old men and women sitting in front of a chalkboard, a fourteen-year-old girl holding a piece of chalk, looking overwhelmed.

He found Grandma Yuki in the back row, her silver head bent down. First thinking she was asleep, Kaoru put a gentle hand on her shoulder and shook slightly. "Grandma, wake up." She said in a soothing voice.

Grandma Yuki immediately shot her head and looked at Kaoru. "I wasn't _sleeping_," she huffed before holding up a thin book, "I was _reading_."

Kenshin bit back laughter before Kaoru reached over a slapped his shoulder. "How did you sneak that book in here? You know how Mrs. Yamagata doesn't like you doing that."

"Easy – I stuff it in my bra – it's a thin novel."

Kaoru blushed as Kenshin burst out laughing, completely interrupting the hangman session.

"Ex_cuse_ me! Could you leave if you're going to interrupt?" The fourteen-year-old girl said, putting her hands on her hips.

Grandma Yuki snorted. "Like half of these people are paying attention." She muttered before Kaoru dragged her out of the room, followed by Kenshin's reawakened laughter.

"Grandma…" Kaoru admonished.

Grandma sighed. "I'm sorry, but I just want to get _out_ of here."

Kaoru stared at her with sympathetic eyes. "I know, I know, but you just have a few more weeks of physical therapy and then you can be checked out. Maybe sooner – your walking is getting a lot better!"

"Feh!" Grandma then looked over at Kenshin, who still had a large smile on his face. "Ah, now _that's_ a face that I miss seeing. Dear Kenshin…give this decrepit woman a kiss."

Kenshin grinned. "My pleasure," he said before kissing her weathered cheek. "How are you?"

"I've been better. It's just so…_boring_ here. These people make me do stupid activities. Hangman? One of the most boring games ever created. Yet those people were _riveted_…or were just asleep." She shook her head. "Maybe you can sneak me out of here in that guitar case," she said as she nodded to the guitar in his grasp.

"I wish I could save you from here."

"Hey, don't make me the bad guy here." Kaoru said.

Kenshin smiled and looped an arm around her shoulders. "Relax. I wouldn't do that. If we were going to run away, she'd need to be able to _run_."

Grandma Yuki gave him the finger, making him cackle again.

They enter an empty room with a round table and six empty chairs. A window looked out to the parking lot and the city line beyond the borders of the facility.

"So why are you visiting me – are you skipping school?"

"No, we're on vacation." Kaoru said.

"Ah…" Grandma Yuki stared at the two of them for a moment before asking, "Are you two back together?"

Both teenagers flushed, but Kaoru was the one who quickly responded, "No, we're just friends."

_Words of death_, Kenshin thought to himself bitterly.

"Oh…so you're still going out with that white-haired boy."

Kaoru visibly froze, unsure of what to say. Kenshin decided to answer for her and said, "That remains a mystery as of now."

"Do you want anything for lunch, Grandma? Kenshin?" Kaoru asked, the chair scraping against the floor as she stood up.

"Yeah – can you make me a chicken Caesar salad? You know what I like." Grandma Yuki said, wisely not commenting on Kenshin's response.

"See if you can get me a Dr. Pepper." Kenshin said before adding, "Thanks."

Kaoru quickly left the room, but not before giving Kenshin a pointed look that said it all: don't tell her _everything_.

He sighed looked down at his hands.

"What's going on?" Grandma Yuki asked sharply. "My body may be failing me, but my mind is as sharp as ever."

He smiled. "I know…" He cleared his throat before saying, "Kaoru and Enishi…before vacation…they got into a _fight_. I don't know what was said. But she just came to me afterwards and we've been hanging out ever since."

Grandma Yuki stared at him. "That's the biggest load of horseshit I've ever heard."

He sighed. "I figured you wouldn't believe that. She doesn't want you to know. She probably thinks that you'll think less of her if you knew what really happened."

"What happened? What did that son of a bitch do?"

He sighed again. "She caught him…in a _compromising_ position, if you know what I mean."

She did, and it was very obvious that she understood. "Let me at him! Nobody does that to my daughter! I'll wring his neck!"

He put a finger to his lips and put a hand on her arm. "Shh! If she figures out that I told you she'll flip a shit! Please don't say anything!"

She pursed her lips. "Fine. I'm surprised she didn't dump him right off the bat. She's a strong girl."

He bit his lip before reaching over to take his guitar out. "You want to hear a song? I'm performing on Friday with the band. You'll be he first person to hear it."

She smiled. "Yes, I'd love to – you have such a nice voice."

He tuned the instrument quickly and began playing. It was strangely pleasant to hear the song played with only the acoustic to back his voice, but it worked all the same. She listened intently, her facial expressions masked from him, which was surprising. Usually she let everyone knew what she thought about anything.

When he finished, it was in a whisper, because the way her eyes were boring into his made him feel vulnerable. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea – maybe he was better off finding a random person off the street.

They stared at each other for a few moments until she shook her head. "Why haven't you told her anything?"

"What am I supposed to do? Go up to her while she's holding hands with Enishi and say, 'hey, Kao, you know I'm still not over you, so you should definitely come back to me and ditch the prep, because he clearly doesn't hold as much feelings for you as I do.'" He shook his head. "It's more complicated than that."

"You're making it complicated. This is the perfect opportunity! Tell her how you feel!"

"Well…that's where this song came from. I was hoping that the message would kind of…get to her. Make her realize. She knows that I have trouble directly conveying my emotions."

She sighed. "Look, kid, let's be realistic. My life is going to end soon."

Kenshin turned white. "That's not true! You're recovering – you're getting so much better!"

She chuckled. "I feel it – this body is getting tired." She stared at him for a moment. "Oh, don't get upset. It's the only thing we know for sure about life. You know that, right?" She said kindly.

He bit his lip hard. "I really hate it though." He admitted, feeling more like a child at that moment.

She shrugged. "Once you get older, you'll get used to it. Besides, all those loved ones who die are together having a party, right?"

He smiled sadly. "I wish I could be so sure – it's a scary thought…after death, I mean. That's why I _want_ to live life to the fullest…because I just don't know what happens after it. Do we just disappear, go into darkness and that's it? Is there some sweet afterlife where you meet The Big Guy and just chill? Or are you continually reborn and live different lives? I have no idea…so I might as well take complete advantage of _this_ life because it's not definite if there's an afterlife." He admitted.

Grandma Yuki's eyes shifted to the doorway where Kaoru was standing in the doorway, her eyes filled with tears. When Kenshin turned his head to meet her gaze, tears fell down her cheeks.

* * *

"I never knew your reasons for always saying live life to the fullest." Kaoru said in the car after a good half hour of silence in the car.

He closed his eyes for a brief second before looking ahead. "I didn't lie to you – my mom _is_ the core reason for it."

She sighed. "Yeah, but…you just told me it's because your mom died so suddenly and you got freaked out by how easy it is to just die without warning. You _never_ mentioned _once_ about a possible afterlife. I didn't know that you were _worried_ for her." Her voice cracked at the end.

"I didn't want you to think about it." He said in a low voice.

"Why not?" She asked harshly.

"Because you were already uneasy about your faith in Christianity – you weren't completely sure about God to begin with. I didn't want my beliefs or insecurities to affect you. Because, trust me, being unsure about this makes you lose sleep."

Tears filled her eyes again. He was right – she was unsure. And now?

He groaned. "The last thing I want to do is make you cry. I never wanted that. Even when we were going out and we told each other stuff that we could _never_ tell anyone else…I just couldn't do that. Maybe I had no right to judge…but I just knew that wasn't in the contract of being a good boyfriend."

She shook her head. "I wasn't _five_, Kenshin. I could've handled it."

"No! Kaoru! You're not _understanding_ what I'm trying to tell you!" He said in a loud voice, making her jump. He _never_ lost his temper with her.

"There are some things that are just common sense. When you have the most amazing girl on your arm, you don't do things to hurt her. If you truly care about her, you don't do that. It's not just a mistake. What Enishi did wasn't a mistake that you could forgive him for. He _hurt_ you, he made you _cry_. What kind of boyfriend is supposed to do that?"

He had _no_ idea where that came from. He didn't mean to start blathering about Enishi. But as soon as he said the words, he immediately wanted to take them back.

He was surprised to see a small smile on her face. "Yeah…what boyfriend _is_ supposed to do that?" She said in the quietest of voices. She shook her head. "But…all the same…you should've shared that burden. Now that I know that you've been carrying that thought with you for so many years…it upsets me."

He stayed silent until they parked in her driveway. "Would it be really weird to say that I think we both need a hug?"

She choked out a laugh. "No," she said as she opened the door and got out.

She jumped into his arms as soon as he shut his door. He held her tight as she cried into his shoulder. Rubbing her back, he relished the contact. She cried for a long time, and he didn't bother to comment that the way her body pressed up against every plane of his body was improper in a "just friends" relationship.

* * *

"_Do you, Kenshin and the rest of the band want to chill with me, Aoshi, and Yumi tomorrow?"_

Kaoru choked on the Dr. Pepper she was drinking. "_What_?"

"_Yeah! Aoshi and I want to go painballing and we need a party of eight for it to be fun. So you should definitely say yes_._"_ The last sentence was said in a threatening manner, which was why Kaoru agreed. _"Yay! Okay, so we're going to that place upstate. We'll meet there at eleven and we'll have four hours."_

"I love how you reserved it even though we didn't agree."

"_Oh, I knew you were going to say yes."_

Kaoru shook her head. "Okay, I'll talk to you later then." She hung up and looked to Kenshin. "We're going paintballing tomorrow."

"I love how you said yes even though I didn't agree." He said with a smirk.

"Touché."

He grinned. "Sounds fun – I went once."

"I've never gone. Are you good?"

"Aim-wise? Not a chance. Ducking? Hell yeah."

"Cool, we'll be ducking buddies. What should I wear?"

He sighed. "Lead me to your room. Girls really don't know how to dress for this." He said, standing up and finishing up his Dr. Pepper.

She sighed and walked up the stairs to her room.

"Okay, tell me what you want to wear." He said, taking a seat on her bed.

She rummaged through her shelves for a couple of minutes before pulling out the pair of jeans that he loved most on her that she wore on Saturday, the loose pair, and the First Absolute shirt that she wore for one day in gym.

He knew right away that he was right – she didn't know what paintballing was about.

"Okay, first of all, you love those jeans. Don't try and tell me otherwise – you're not going to want to get those dirty. Second, that shirt is one of a kind. What happens if you get paint right in the middle of it?"

She scowled. "I hate you." She went back to her shelves.

He sighed and stood up, walking around her room. A satisfied grin was on his face when he saw the picture of them at the gas station was in the picture frame beside her bed. He was restored to his original place.

He walked slowly to the bookshelf where papers from school were sticking out. Her desk held all her textbooks and more written work. One piece was sticking out of a drawer. Curiosity overwhelming him, he took it out and opened it.

He looked at the paper and was shocked to find MASH written at the top in large, round handwriting, clearly the handwriting of a pre-teen girl. He read the results from the bottom to the top.

_Pet: Dog_

_Kids: 2_

_Color of Wedding Dress: White_

_Car: VW Beetle_

_Maid of Honor: Misao_

_Husband: Kenshin_

A huge grin was on his face when he finished reading.

* * *

A/N: Yay! I'm so excited to move on!! The next chapter is going to fuuun…

Please review!

MissGoalie


	10. Vacation: 5

A/N: SCHOOL'S OVER! SENIORS '09 BABY!

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 5

"_Kaoru_! I know you're in there! Talk to me, please!"

Kaoru was sitting across from her front door, not reacting with every bang against the door. It was Megumi, and Kaoru simply wasn't in the mood to deal with anyone post-Break-Up-With-Kenshin.

Megumi stopped knocking, causing Kaoru to let out a breath of relief.

"You know…I'm still your friend. I never told you any lies. You're my best friend. Please, Kaoru, let me in," Megumi said in a lower voice that was beginning to crack.

Kaoru sighed and slowly stood up. She reached out her hand to the knob and hesitated. Feeling guilty, she twisted the knob and opened the door to reveal Megumi crossing her arms and staring at Kaoru intently.

"Hi," Kaoru said shortly.

"Hi," Megumi said, looking unsure.

Kaoru let the awkward silence last for a minute. "You were itching to see me, what is it?" she asked.

Megumi glared. "What the hell have you been doing? You haven't answered any of my calls, nor Tomoe's, nor Enishi's. What the hell happened on Friday?"

Kaoru winced at the thought of Friday night. A flash of Enishi in bed with that faceless slut came across her mind, but it didn't hurt as much anymore – she had already absorbed it.

"It was Enishi," Kaoru managed to choke out. Even though she accepted the fact that he cheated on her, it was still hard to say it out loud.

Megumi didn't say anything for a moment. "Was he…did he…" she trailed off, not wanting to say the words out loud either.

"Yeah…basically…"

Megumi's eyes widened. "Oh…that…_asshole_."

"Where's Tomoe?" Kaoru asked, hoping to stay away from the topic of Enishi as long as possible.

"Her whacko cousin died on Sunday – heroine overdose or something like that – never met the guy but she's in Florida for the funeral," Megumi explained.

"Oh…right…that guy…" Kaoru said, vaguely recalling Tomoe mentioning him in passing. He was an embarrassment to the family.

"But…_God_…no wonder he was so hell-bent on talking to you – he's really devastated. Now I get it…_asshole_…"

"Look, I don't want to think about him – I turned my phone off and I'm just having _me_ time this week. I'm thinking about stuff."

"That's not what Misao said."

Kaoru narrowed her eyes. "What did she say?"

"You're hanging out with _Kenshin Himura_? What's that about? Is this some sort of revenge or something – spend the entire week with your ex-boyfriend to drive Enishi crazy or something?"

"No! It's not revenge!" Kaoru shook her head. "You know what, forget it. I'll explain it after vacation or something. I'm going out with Kenshin today."

Hurt crept into Megumi's eyes. "You can't just _dump_ me like that. I can't just _stop_ being your friend for a week."

Kaoru sighed. "I'm not asking you to stop being my friend, I'm asking you to give me _space_. I'm so confused and mixed up right now and I think I need to go back to my roots."

A loud honk made both girls jump. It was Kenshin wearing those Oakley sunglasses with a black top hot, which almost made Kaoru laugh out loud. He took off his sunglasses and stared at the two of them with curiosity.

"Won't that just make you more confused by hanging out with him?" Megumi asked with a hint of anger.

"We're _friends_ God damn it. We were friends _long _before we started going out," Kaoru exclaimed.

She heard the car door shut and knew he was coming up to them.

Megumi looked at her with confusion etched on every part of her face. "You were?" She had no idea – Kaoru never told Megumi about her past with Kenshin.

"Good morning, ladies! A fine day it is today, isn't it? It almost feels like summer!" Kenshin greeted the two of them with a British accent, taking of his hat (which on closer inspection was flimsy cardboard) and bowing at them.

Kaoru smiled. "Indeed it does." She looked to Megumi, who was staring at Kenshin with an expression torn between amusement and shock. She never got to see the extent of his quirkiness. "We're going paintballing."

"Oh…never been," Megumi said faintly.

"Me neither. It should be fun. I'll talk to you later," Kaoru said with a small smile.

Megumi's eyes became misty. "Fine. See you around," she said before walking back to her car, her long hair flowing out behind her.

Kenshin looked at Kaoru. "What was that about?" he asked as Megumi pulled out of her driveway.

Kaoru didn't answer him for a moment. "She was making sure that I was okay."

He smiled. "For what it's worth…I didn't mind you becoming friends with her. I mean, sometimes you acted fake with her…but she's not a bad person. I think that just proved it," he said, pointing his thumb back to where Megumi's car was.

She lowered her eyes. "I can't…" she let out a breath. "This sounds really stupid…but I can't _handle_ anyone…Post-Break Up."

He quirked his head to the side. "You mean…_our_ break up?"

"Yeah."

"Why?" he asked.

"…Because…before our break up everything was simple. There wasn't any deception or lies or being fake. Seeing Enishi…like that…made me realize that this past year was just so…_draining_."

He nodded. "Pretending to be someone else can do that to you."

"I mean, Megumi isn't…_that_…but she's still related. I became close with her after the fact."

"So let me get this straight – you've finally realized that you completely pulled a one-eighty after we broke up?"

Kaoru didn't say anything.

He grinned. "We're getting somewhere," he said before putting his top hat back on and holding out his arm. "Come, fair lady, we're parking at Yahiko's house and we're taking the van."

She smiled; glad he was able to drop it. Taking his arm they walked down the front steps to his car. He opened the door for her, an action that she thanked most graciously. When he shut the door and turned around to get to his door, she started laughing hysterically when she saw the back of his hat: Happy New Year! was written in silver glitter.

"What's so funny?" he asked, turning the key in the ignition.

"Why the _hell_ are you wearing a New Year's hat?" she asked as she continued to laugh.

He let out a chuckle. "Oh, well, I wanted to wear a fun hat, but I didn't have any. So I was searching through the attic and I found all this New Year crap that we haven't taken out since my mom passed…"

"You kind of look like a tool."

"Oh, thanks a lot. Really nice of you," he said while searching through his iPod. When he plugged it in, the base of "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World played. "This song is so great."

She smiled. "Yeah, I loved them."

"Why the past tense? They're still great!"

"…It's hard listening to all this old stuff."

"Why?" he asked.

She ignored him, pretending that she didn't hear him – she didn't want to explain that one. Maybe by the end of the week she would tell him, but for now she wanted the lightness of their friendship.

After the first chorus, Kenshin twisted the knob in his car so the music was louder. "I love this stanza, it's my favorite," he said.

_Hey, you know they're all the same_

_You know you're doing better on your own_

_So don't by in._

_Live right now_

_Yeah, just be yourself._

_It doesn't matter if it's good enough_

_For someone else._

"It would be your favorite," she said.

"Yeah, it's like that Dr. Seuss quote, 'Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind,'"

She felt her heart beat faster as she watched the sunlight streaming from the trees illuminated the brightness of his eyes. Biting her lip, she wondered why it felt as if the past year never happened, and that being with him still felt like they were in a relationship of more than friendship.

* * *

As Kenshin and Kaoru pulled into Yahiko's driveway, they were screaming the lyrics to a 'NSYNC song. Aoshi, Yumi, Misao, Yahiko, Sano, and Soujiro were already outside by the van, clearly waiting for Kenshin and Kaoru. When they got out of the car, Sano held out his hands on either side of him.

"What the fuck, man, what the fuck," he merely asked.

Kenshin took his sunglasses and top hat off. "We're going down memory lane music-wise."

Sano eyed the two of them. "That's not the only thing you're going down memory lane in. What the hell have you two been doing?"

Kenshin shrugged. "Nothing. Catching up."

"Right…"

"Kaoru! Oh my God!" Yumi squealed, pushing past all the guys to throw her arms around Kaoru's neck.

Kaoru froze at first, but then held Yumi tightly. "Hi Yumi, long time no see."

Yumi snorted. "Actually, I saw you a couple of days. You know, your binge drinking escapade."

Kaoru blushed. "Oh…yeah…that."

Yumi pulled away and took hold of Kaoru's hands. "So word on the street is that Kenshin wrote this amazing song about you."

Kaoru's eyes widened. "What?" She looked to Kenshin, who put his sunglasses back on and turned his attention to Yahiko.

Yumi nodded. "Yeah, they won't tell me anything about it…but…yeah it's about you."

"If they won't tell you anything about it then –"

"Oh, just the fact that Kenshin _flat out_ refuses to tell you – it's pretty safe to assume."

Kaoru looked over at Kenshin who was now laughing with Soujiro. He looked back at her and gave her a small smile before turning back to Soujiro.

Yumi gave Kaoru a knowing look. "Oh, yeah, it's _definitely_ about you."

"Let's go! Our reservation is in almost two hours – it takes more than an hour to get there!" Misao yelled.

Sano rolled his eyes. "You know…if you let _me_ drive – "

"_No_!" everybody exclaimed.

"Your driving kills people – no way. Sou can drive," Kenshin said.

"No, he's too cautious, I'll drive since it's _my_ van."

"Fine – why does Yahiko always end up driving the van?"

"I just _said_ why, dickweed – it's my hunk of metal!"

Sano and Yahiko argued as they walked over to the van, Yahiko having to push Sano out of the way to get to the driver's seat. Aoshi, who had been silently observing, walked over to get shotgun.

"Hey, what the hell Shinomori! You have to call shotgun!"

"I did, nobody heard me," Aoshi said simply as he got into the car.

"You can't deny that, Sano. Besides, I doubt you really want to question the man," Kenshin said, patting Sano on the back.

"But I can," Yumi said as she yanked open the door to the van. "Yo! Get out and sit with Misao! If you want to hook up with her today you better sit in the back!"

Kaoru's jaw dropped at how _forward_ she was. What was more surprising was that Aoshi _listened_ to her and joined Misao in the very back row, who was trying very hard to contain herself.

Yumi held the door open for Sano.

"You're not taking it for yourself? I'm shocked," Sano said, grinning at her.

"Nah, I'll squeeze in the middle row with the K-squared unit and Sou," she sent a charming smile in Soujiro's direction, causing him to stare at her with wide eyes.

Sano cackled in the front, and when Soujiro got into the seat behind him, he kicked Sano's seat hard.

Kaoru and Yumi were squished in between Kenshin and Soujiro. To ease Kaoru's obvious discomfort, Kenshin slipped his arm behind her so she was partially lying on him.

"Thanks," she said gratefully.

"So, Ken, you were listening to some old-school stuff?" Yumi asked as Yahiko started pulling out his driveway.

"Yeah. Third Eye Blind was coming up next," Kenshin said, reaching into his back pocket for his iPod.

There was a gasp from behind. "Third Eye Blind?! Oh my God – put them on now!" Misao exclaimed.

Yumi took Keshin's iPod and plugged into the car. She searched through his massive list of artists and settled on Third Eye Blind.

"_Just an old friend coming over/Now to visit you and that's what I've become!_" Kenshin sang.

"I love this song," Kaoru whispered.

"Yes! Present tense!" Kenshi said happily.

"Oh, wait best line," Sano and Yahiko said at the same time before pausing. "_And I wanna stay right here and go down on you for an hour!_" they both sang before laughing.

Yumi shook her head. "Boys."

"Wait, first chorus is the best," Misao said.

"Nah, I like the last," Kenshin added.

"Whatever, who cares about your opinion – jack up the volume, Yahiko!"

Kenshin laughed as Yahiko blasted the volume.

Kaoru couldn't forget these lyrics, so she sang along loudly with the rest of the gang. She could've sworn she felt someone glancing at her every so often, but she was afraid to look next to her to meet those glances.

* * *

"Can I get pink, please?" Kaoru asked, and Kenshin looked at her, raising her eyebrows. Being that it was Kaoru's first time to paintball, she got first choice of paint.

"They don't come in pink, Kao," he said. "They only come in assorted neon, or silver and blue."

"Are there pink ones in the assorted neon?" she asked, peering over his shoulder. "I see pink! There are pink!"

"Well, yeah, but there aren't only pink ones."

"We can't just pick them out?" she asked, smiling.

"What are you, five? No," he said while shaking his head.

"Okay, then I want the assorted neon. It's what, green orange, yellow, and pink?"

"Yes," he said, reaching for the bag of neon paintballs. "Now, put these in the barrel at the top of your gun." She nodded, yanking open the bag, half of the paintballs exploding from the bag and hitting the ground.

"Whoops," she said, and he rolled his eyes. "Can I still use them?"

"Well, you have to put them in your gun to use them," he said, emptying the silver and blue he'd bought for himself into his gun and setting the barrel cover on so he didn't accidentally shoot her in the face. He bent down to help her pick up the paintballs, emptying them into her barrel and closing the top when all of the ones that could be rescued were. "Now, do you remember what I told you?"

"Always wear my safety goggles," she replied dutifully.

"Very good," he said, smiling. "Carol never wore her safety goggles, and now she doesn't need them."

She laughed. "I hated that poster – there were three of them in my chemistry room."

"I remember that," he said, putting his hand over her gun. "Now, you have to keep this barrel closed, or else all of your paintballs will go flying all over the place and then you won't have any ammo." She smiled up at him. "So you press the trigger to shoot, obvs, and the paintball will go in the air really quickly. But make sure you aim at the other team. Don't shoot your own players."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," she said.

"And there's a surrender rule. If you cock your gun at someone and they're within ten feet of you, they have to say surrender. And that means that you can't shoot them. It'll hurt. Trust me, bad experience…" he said, wincing at the memory.

"Okay, can we just play now?"

"Well, we have to wait for this game to finish, then we'll get on."

"I'm so excited," she said as she practically skipped to the picnic tables where everyone was sitting.

"How are we doing this?" Kenshin asked.

"_Duh_ – First Absolute versus the Others," Sano said.

"The Others? Like in _Lost_?" Soujiro asked with an amused expression.

"It makes the most sense, and it divides everyone evenly."

Kenshin looked to Kaoru. "Prepare yourself – it's not for the faint of heart."

She glared at him as she cocked her gun in the air, trying to look like a spy. "I'm no weak little girl."

"Shoo! We need to strategize," Sano said to Misao, Yumi, Kaoru, and Aoshi.

After spending twenty minutes coming up with a plan of attack, First Absolute was ready. The other team on the field had finished their time and walked off, leaving the field to the eight of them for the next couple of hours.

At the base, Kenshin was worried about Kaoru – he didn't think they would be on opposite teams. He wanted to be on the same team as her so she could watch him play, and so he could protect her. Because of this circumstance, he would have to avoid Kaoru.

The horn sounded and the band took off, hiding behind the inflatable walls and logs that littered the playing field. He saw her duck behind a cylinder as he slid into one himself, and he pulled his gun out around the side, firing at the cylinder she was at, purposely trying to hit it just to scare her a little bit.

The noise was deafening, and he saw one of his teammates – Yahiko – head toward a neighboring cylinder before being hit by a paintball. He threw his arm in the air, the sign for an execution, and hurried off the field, leaving Kenshin's team with only three players to Kaoru's team of four. Kenshin quickly shot Yumi, relief sweeping over him when she put his arm up in the air and hurried off to join Yahiko. He could have easily taken a shot at Kaoru and hit her, but he decided against it. He didn't want to hurt her.

Soujiro was running around the field, dodging paintballs left and right. Kenshin knew Soujiro was a master at paintballing, having played it many times without the band with his cousins. Soujiro quickly took a shot at Kaoru, missing by half an ich, and Kenshin heard her shriek. Kenshin moved up the field, catching a glimpse of Soujiro in just enough time to see him knock out Misao, making it the three of them against Kaoru and Aoshi.

However, that didn't last long as Aoshi quickly picked off Soujiro and Sano. Kaoru hadn't moved from her spot in the back cylinder, but Aoshi had, moving up to where Kenshin could almost see him well enough to be sure he had a target. He could see the back of his legs moving between the obstacles, trying to rush over to the next but keeping an eye behind him on Kaoru.

After finding the perfect angle to shoot Aoshi from, he heard Kaoru say, "Surrender," from a couple hundred yards behind him.

He turned around, surprise etched on his face, and just as he did, a paintball exploded from her gun, hitting him square in the chest. She looked down at her gun, mortified. He clutched his chest. "Oh God, damn it Kaoru."

"Sorry," she shrugged sheepishly. "I didn't mean to…" He nodded. "_Really_, I guess it slipped." She quickly reached over and put the barrel cover on.

"It's okay," he said, raising his hand into the air and trotting off the field.

She followed after him. "So, you were taking it easy on me, weren't you Himura?"

"No, of course not," he said, flustered.

"Oh, admit it Himura." He shook his head. "Well, I owned you. You're my bitch now," she replied, and he rolled his eyes, chuckling.

"Sounds kinky," Sano said.

Kenshin's smile fell off his face and he gave Sano the middle finger. "Suck it."

"That's what she said!" Yahiko exclaimed.

"Ew!" Misao grimaced.

"If I were you," Kaoru leaned up, whispering in Kenshin's ear, "I'd go with the 'taking it easy on her' thing…it makes you seem more masculine."

Having her lips so close to his ear _definitely_ made him feel more masculine, but he stuck his tongue out at her.

"C'mon, let's go play some more! We need a rematch! It's every man for himself, Kenshin!" Yumi said, glaring at Kenshin.

"But we're on _teams_," Kenshin started.

"No! She can take care of herself!" Yumi pointed to Kaoru. "We're going again!" Then Yumi turned back to Kenshin. "Don't be chivalrous in this! I know damn well that you could've shot Kaoru but didn't."

"How did you –?"

"Get back to the base!"

"Yes, ma'am!"

* * *

"Wait, aren't we going home?" Kaoru asked as Yahiko merged on the highway, going in the opposite direction from home.

Kenshin tisked. "Come now, Kaoru, you know that we don't plan anything."

"We planned on going paintballing!"

"Yeah, but that's because planning for that is a necessity – you need to reserve the place. But it's all up in the air now – now life is getting interesting again!"

Kaoru shook her head. "What do you _want_ to do?"

"Meh, whatever catches our attention."

"_OH_! Friendly's! Let's go there! I want a sundae!" Misao squealed.

"Everyone game?" Sano asked.

Kaoru sighed. "I'm in – bring on the calories!"

"Hey! No talk of that in this car!" Kenshin chided.

Kaoru closed her mouth and smiled.

"That's better! Just smile, gorgeous. Think about the consequences later," Yumi said.

"You know what…why think about them at all this week? I'm on _vacation_, for Christ's sake! Fuck society's standards – I want to do what _I_ want to do."

"Hear, hear!" everyone exclaimed.

"I'll drink to that!" Sano said, craning his neck to the back.

"You'd drink to anything," Soujiro added.

"Yeah, whatever, man," Sano said while giving Soujiro the finger.

"Fuck, who has the cash for this?" Yahiko asked as he got off the exit.

"My treat – mom lent me the credit card," Kaoru said.

"Nice!"

"Are you sure, I can take care of it," Kenshin murmured in Kaoru's ear.

She waved a dismissive hand. "Don't worry about it. You guys are helping me, I'll help you."

"It's well appreciated."

"Same here."

Kenshin grinned, managing yet again to take her breath away.

"Oh…Yumi…our mom called. She's been trying to reach you but you've been ignoring her," Aoshi said from the back.

Yumi craned her neck to see her brother and gave him an ugly look. "There's a _reason_ for that – I don't want to talk to that bitch."

"This isn't a joke – she's really going to do it if you don't start talking to her and shaping up."

"What's going on?" Kenshin asked.

Yumi gave an exasperated sigh. "My _bitch_ of a mother doesn't like my attitude…and she doesn't like that I'm in this band without good grades. She wants to put me in boarding school or something."

Kenshin had a quizzical expression on his face. "But…you're already a junior…why would she just switch you into a different school?"

Yumi made a strangled sound – a mix between a laugh and a sob. "I don't know…but I can't bear to _look_ at her, let alone talk to her," she said as she reached into her pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes.

Kaoru looked to Kenshin, wondering how he was going to react. He pursed his lips and didn't say anything for a good while until she took her first drag.

"Since when did you smoke?" he finally asked.

Yumi blew out smoke and chuckled. "Oh, Kenshin, for a while, now." He looked hurt and she noticed. "I didn't smoke around you – when I thought we might see each other at shows I'd skip out on smoking that day. You couldn't tell."

There was a tense silence until they pulled into the parking lot. Kenshin was the first to get out of the car and he took deep breaths. Kaoru followed soon afterward and was about to stand by his side until Yumi said, "Kaoru! Walk with me," looping her arm with Kaoru's. "You guys get us a booth – we're going for a stroll," Yumi said before taking another drag.

They watched the boys and Misao walk into Friendly's before they started walking down the street in silence. Kaoru was waiting for Yumi to say something.

"Did Kenshin tell you anything about his love life after you two broke up?" Yumi started, slowing her pace.

"He just said that he never went out with anyone…not ready for another relationship…" Kaoru answered, not sure where Yumi was going with this.

Yumi nodded. "Yeah…that's true…but…how do I word this? How do I tell the ex-girlfriend of the boy that still pines for her has hooked up with other people?"

Kaoru nearly stopped in her tracks. "He's _hooked up_ with other people?"

"Well, I don't know how many others he has, or if he has at all, but…we've hooked up. A number of times." Kaoru remained silent, giving Yumi the opportunity to continue. "It started after a couple of months you two ended. I had just ended a really shitty relationship and he was still just…not over you…and one thing led to another and we found ourselves in the back of my van."

Kaoru closed her eyes. "Didn't need to hear that."

Yumi shrugged. "I just wanted you to know that."

"Well, frankly, I wish I _didn't_. It didn't need to be rubbed in my face."

"Kind of like what you did to him everyday at school," Yumi said, raising an eyebrow.

Kaoru closed her mouth. "Okay, I was a bitch about that. But all I wanted was to _move on_. So I thought, why don't I just continually show Enishi off, so then he could finally get the point that I'm moving on and that he should do the same." She gave an exasperated sigh. "It's just that boy is so _stubborn_. Won't let anything go. And it's not even overt. Just giving meaningful looks across the cafeteria drives me crazy."

Yumi smiled. "He needs to work on being more overt."

They continued walking in silence for a few moments until Kaoru asked, "What do you mean by hooking up? Do you mean…pre-junior year type of hooking up or…"

"Yeah, the first one. Sex complicates things. I learned that that hard way," Yumi said, her sad eyes looking upwards before taking a deep drag.

"I'm sorry…I didn't mean – "

Yumi blew out a wisp of smoke. "Hey, don't worry about it. Old news." Yumi said, waving her free hand holding the cigarette. "So…that's what I really wanted to tell you."

"And I have something to tell you."

They turned back around to Friendly's. "What?"

"You really upset Kenshin by smoking in front of him, couldn't you have waiting to smoke until after tonight?"

Yumi threw her cigarette on the pavement and crushed it under her paint-covered Converse. "He knew – my clothes always smelled. Deep down he knew, he just wishes it wasn't true – it reminds him of Sozo. But I never wanted to smoke in front of him – he'd rather have me smoking pot than cigarettes."

"Pot is a gateway drug – why would he prefer that?"

"Because he believes that a good number of decent people smoke pot as part of a phase – they usually grow out of it. Cigarettes…that lasts…I don't know. It doesn't really make too much sense, but it's his view." Yumi shook her head. "He's so naïve."

Kaoru bit her lip. "He believes in the best of people."

Yumi smiled as she opened the door to Friendly's. "Yeah, that's why he won't give up on you," she said as she walked inside.

* * *

"Okay, can we do a confession circle? I have a burning question that needs to be asked," Misao asked, taking a spoonful of vanilla ice cream.

"For who?" Kenshin asked.

"Soujiro."

"Me?" Soujiro asked, shocked.

"How about this," she took a bite out of the brownie in her sundae, "each person asks one question, each person gets one question. Like, I ask Soujiro something, and nobody else can ask him anything. Got it?"

"I call asking Sano," Kenshin said.

"Wow, I'm really curious about this, Kenny-boy. Okay, I call Missy," Sano said, nodding toward Kaoru.

"I call Kenshin," Yumi exclaimed.

"I call Misao," Aoshi said, surprising everyone at the table.

"Okay, you get to ask me something, Sou," Yumi said, giving a charming smile.

"But I could've called – " Soujiro started, pointing toward Aoshi.

Yumi widened her smile, promptly shutting him up.

"Alright, I get Aoshi. Can I start?" Yahiko asked, eating his mint chocolate chip ice cream. "Okay, when the fuck did you learn how to play the bass? Like, give details."

Half the table groaned. "That's so not juicy at all!"

Aoshi briefly smiled. "I was nine. I played guitar when I was six…but I switched later because it was easier on the parents' ears." Aoshi then turned his attention toward Misao. "Would you like to go out to dinner with me?"

"YES!"

Everyone laughed as Misao threw her arms around Aoshi's rigid shoulders. She turned her face to Soujiro. "Okay, Soujiro, have you been in a relationship before?"

Soujiro turned bright pink. "That's _so_…"

"You have to answer the question!"

"Why the hell do I get the personal question?!"

"Don't worry, I've got one for Missy here, you won't be alone," Sano said, making Kaoru visibly tensed.

"Just answer the question, Seta," Misao said in a threatening tone.

"No, I haven't, okay?" Soujiro said, turning redder.

"Have you hooked up with anyone?"

"I thought it was one question _only_!"

"Answer. The question. Now."

Soujiro shuddered. "Ugh, _yes_, I have. At camp, happy? Her name was Mai."

"Does this girl exist?" Misao asked.

"Wow, that is very obnoxious of you," Soujiro stated.

"Yes, she does, we've seen pictures of the two of them," Yahiko answered.

"My turn!" Soujiro exclaimed, looking at Yumi who was staring at him expectantly. "Why have you been hitting on me _all day_?"

Yumi grinned. "Your naïve cuteness is hard to resist."

Soujiro rolled his eyes. "I'm not _naïve_."

"Yeah, you are. You expect the best in people…that's why you and Himura are friends…but he's losing a bit of his naïveté, right?" Yumi looked to Kenshin, who in turn looked down at the table. "And my question for you, Kenshin, is…what's the one thing about Kaoru that keeps you around? Like, despite _everything_…why do you wait around?"

Kenshin's eyes drifted to Kaoru, who was blushing. He stared at her for a minute until he said, "I believe I got the more personal question, Soujiro." He cleared his throat and remained silent for another minute. "I don't know…there are a lot of things…but I guess if you want to be really cliché…it's her soul," he said, looking directly at Kaoru. "And…that I know deep down she knows that it's not over."

Kaoru swallowed, trying to breathe properly. On any normal day, she would recant and say, "It was over when I said it was that day on your front step," but at that moment, she couldn't manage to.

He switched his gaze over to Sano and grinned. "Sano…"

"Oh God…" Sano muttered.

"Be honest – as a kid, who did you look up to the most?"

Sano stared at Kenshin for a few moments, puzzled, until it clicked. "You know the answer already, you bastard."

Kenshin's grin grew wider. "Just say it."

Sano groaned. "Your older brother, okay? He was cool back then, and he's still cool now…cooler than _you_ anyway."

"I knew it."

"Fuck you – I'm not speaking to you directly until tomorrow." Sano turned his attention to Kaoru. "Kaoru…what's your middle name?"

"Don't have one."

"Damn it. _Fine_, Kaoru Kamiya, my question to you is…" he trailed off and thought for a minute.

"Don't think too hard, we don't want you suffering brain damage," Yahiko joked.

"Ha ha, Yahiko, that's _so_ original. You know what else is original? Me kicking your puny ass."

Yahiko glared. "Ass wipe."

"Anyway, before I was so _rudely_ interrupted…Kaoru…what is the one reason why you broke up with Kenshin that nobody else knows about? Like, we all know the other reasons…like he doesn't have ambition yaddy-yah…but what's a reason that you never shared?"

Kenshin cocked his head to the side, very curious as to her response.

Kaoru thought about making up some answer, but she was tired of lying and putting up a front so she admitted, "One reason I broke up with you…was because I didn't want you to have to change."

"Whoa, hold up, I thought…" Kenshin stuttered.

"You think I broke up with you because Tomoe told me to? Yes, Kenshin, I did. But I also broke up with you because I didn't want you to change and try to be like them. I wanted you to be the Kenshin I…know and appreciate and care for."

There was a tense silence, everyone completely shocked by her answer.

"You wanted me to be me?" he said in an incredulous voice. Years of sleepless nights wondering what he had done wrong and how different it would've been if he had tried harder to fit into her world had taken their toll on him.

"I wanted…I wanted you to be you. I wanted you to be who you were…are. I wanted you to do what you wanted to do. I wanted you to live your life, not the life you think I wanted to have. Because, frankly, you would've changed everything about you if you knew my ultimatum back then."

She took a deep breath and waited patiently for Kenshin to snap out of his stupor.

"Wow…that's…_crazy_…I can't believe that was one of your reasons," Sano managed to say.

"Yeah, it's complete bullshit, but hey, what do I know? I'm no master of relationships," Yumi said.

"Let's go," Kenshin said, standing up. "I want to talk to Kaoru alone."

"Wait but Yahiko wasn't –" Sano complained.

"Yahiko – what's your favorite color?" Kenshin shot at Yahiko.

"Yellow."

"Okay, we're done."

"That's so unfair I can't even begin –"

"_Move it._ Yahiko, get in the van and drive quickly."

Kaoru wasn't quite so sure she should've made that confession.

* * *

A/N: Ah! Sorry this took so long! But now that school is officially OVER – I'll have more time to write (in between college visits…) so thanks for your patience up until now!

Please review!

MissGoalie


	11. Vacation: 6

A/N: Sorry for the late update! I'll explain at the end of the chapter.

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 6

At fifteen minutes past midnight, Kenshin and Kaoru drove in silence back to his house. She didn't dare to comment that she needed to go home; she never saw him so visibly angry before.

She winced when he got out of the car and slammed his door shut, following a couple of paces behind him. He didn't turn around to face her until she shut his bedroom door behind her.

"What you said…had to be one of the dumbest things."

She was hurt. "Why?"

"Because that's no reason to break up with someone! Come on, Kaoru, that has to be the…I don't know! It's just so not _normal_."

"It was the help me not feel so _guilty_ about it, okay?" Kaoru hissed. "I'm so fucking selfish – is that what you want me to say? I had to come up with a reason to break up with you that wasn't _all _about me, and yet it would help me sleep at night."

"You felt _guilty_? What the hell does that mean?"

"It means that a good portion of the reasons why I broke up with you wasn't honorary in the least."

"And what about the other portion?"

Kaoru stared at him. "Do I even _need_ to explain myself? You did it more than once during this break."

"_What?_ I don't _know_, Kaoru, just _tell me_."

"Your _obsession_ with that _band_! While we were going out I let you skip out on _so_ many dates and special occasions so you could hang out with them!"

"It wasn't like we were just _lounging _around – we were playing! Practicing! This is my _life_, Kaoru. The band is my future, okay? The only thing about the future that doesn't make me _cringe_ is First Absolute getting big."

"You can't rely on that! Do you know how many bands try and make it and fail?" Kaoru exclaimed.

"Yeah, but this is _it_, I know it." Kenshin took a deep breath. "This is huge, Kaoru. For my whole life…my future has been…completely beyond my control. And I feel like…this band…is the only thing I have control over, you know? It's up to _me_ of how good we are. The only thing I'm certain of."

"The _only_ thing you're certain of?" she asked exasperatingly.

"Actually, you're right. That's not the only thing."

"Oh, now I don't know if I want to know what else you're sure of…something like–?"

"Us. I'm certain of us."

She froze. "What the hell does that mean?"

"It means that I'm certain _we'll_ never end. I mean, you've realized that we can't forget what we've had, right? That our break up didn't do anything?"

She groaned. "Yes, I've realized it –"

"Then shouldn't _you_ be certain of us too? I mean…when we were going out I thought the band was my first certainty…but there had to be a reason why I named it 'First Absolute' before I knew it was going to be bigger than a month-long project, right?" he said with a small smile, staring into her eyes, which were widening into ocean globes.

"Ken…" she mouthed, unable to speak.

"Actually, it's partially named after you're favorite song too…when you were younger obviously."

"Which – " she started, until she remembered. "Nine Days."

He started singing in a low voice, "_This is the story of a girl/who cried a river and drowned the whole world_."

She whispered, "_While she looked so sad in photographs I absolutely loved her._"

They both finished, "_When she smiles_."

Tears filled her eyes. "I'm so sorry."

He gave a sad shrug. "It happens."

She shook her head fiercely. "No, it's not…it…"

He put a finger to her lips. "Let's not talk about it now, it's a ridiculous hour."

She smiled and when he turned away, she wiped her eyes.

He grabbed his iPod and speakers. "Let's go outside – the sky looks nice."

"Alright, sure, let's do it."

They walked out the back door in the kitchen and sprawled themselves out on the grass. He searched through his iPod for a minute until he muttered an, "Ah-ha!" and picked a song.

She immediately recognized it after the first three notes. "I love this song," Kaoru said.

"Yeah, the only song on the radio that I actually liked," Kenshin added.

There was a long pause. "Except I hated it, too."

"Same," he admitted. "And I bet it was for the same reason"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah – it reminded us of each other. It's one of those songs where, like, I want to be with you and listen to it."

"Well…we're making up for that now, right?" she whispered.

Another silence as the first chorus came along. "What's your favorite part of the song?"

"I'll point it out when it comes along. What's yours?"

He sighed. "I'll point it out when it comes along…I bet ours are the same."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because we might be totally different superficially and we might have different standards…but the really important stuff…like what things give us meaning…are exactly the same."

She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to breathe.

After the third chorus, she knew he was right.

"_All that I am_," he started.

"_All that I ever was_,"

"_Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see_," they both sang.

"_I don't know where_," she continued, turning to her side.

"_Confused about how as well_." He turned to his side, both facing each other.

"_Just know that these things will never change for us at all_," they finished together.

She didn't know how long they continued to stare at each other, but it was well after the song had ended. Being the first to break the moment by yawning, she watched him stand up and offer a hand.

"You can sleep in my room. You know, like old times," he said.

She sat up and took his hand. He smiled at her before kneeling to pick up his iPod and speakers. They walked into his house hand-in-hand.

"You're dad won't mind?" she whispered as he flipped on the lights to his room.

He shut the door before giving her a blank expression. "Are you serious? He doesn't give a shit."

She sighed. "Yes, he does, and you know it. I mean, he won't get openly angry about it, right?"

"No, I doubt it. Unless we giggle and stay up even later like a bunch of fourth graders. If we disturb his sleep, then we'll get fucked."

"Alright – so do you still have my t-shirt and boxers?" she asked, sounding innocent.

He stopped in his tracks and looked at her, almost wanting to say, "Yes, they've been sitting in my closet for the past year, with my hope of you wearing them again."

Instead he said, "No, I gave shit to Good Will. I'll give you some new clothes."

She pretended she didn't hear how his voice trailed off at the end of his sentence. So while he was searching through his drawers, she walked over to his closet and opened it quietly.

"That's okay, Ken, you can stop searching."

"Why? Do you plan on sleeping in paint-splattered jeans?" he asked in an amused tone.

"No, because I found my old PJs…turns out you didn't give them away," she said, pulling them from the top shelf.

He closed his drawer a little louder than necessary before turning to her. "Oh…I thought I did."

She smiled at him sweetly before walking out of his room to use the bathroom. "I can safely assume that my toothbrush is still here."

He didn't answer her, which she took as a yes. As she changed, he cursed himself for not hiding her old clothes in his sock drawer.

Sighing, he took off his jeans and-shirt and slipped on a white shirt. He plugged his speakers and iPod beside his bed before tossing the pillow that he normally slept on toward the cushioned bench under the window.

"You don't have to be chivalrous – I can sleep on the bench," Kaoru said from the doorway.

His lips parted as he took in her wearing his clothes. He forgot how unbearably attractive it was for her to wear his boxers. He shook his head. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Sleep in your own bed – don't be chivalrous. It's the last thing I deserve from you."

He walked over to her and crossed his arms. "Kaoru, how long have you known me?"

"A long time."

"And when I have _ever_ let you sleep on the bench?"

"Never."

"Okay…so what makes you think this is any different?"

She sighed. "So damn stubborn."

"Indeed I am – now, if I may excuse myself," he said, bowing to her before turning on his heel to use the bathroom.

He took a deep breath and gripped his sink tightly. "What did I get myself into?" he asked himself in the mirror. He stared at his violet eyes, feeling the too-familiar mixture of hatred and appreciation. As much as he hated the constant reminder of his late mother, he could never forget the number of times Kaoru had said he had the most beautiful eyes she'd ever seen.

He turned off the light and went back into the room to find Kaoru sitting on top of his bed, waiting patiently.

"You didn't have to wait – just crash," he said as he walked over to the bench drawer and pulled out a blanket. Tossing it on the cushion, he went up to his door and turned off the light.

As he got himself settled, he said, "Pleasant dreams."

"You too," she said.

There were a few moments of silence until she said in a small voice, "I'm sorry I'm using you."

He swallowed. "I'll admit…using me as that old, comfortable couch is getting a bit old."

"It's wrong of me."

"But…I think I take advantage of how easy our friendship is too. Like…being friends is so easy and effortless for us."

"It's hard to get rid of it."

"Well…I don't think that's the whole couch."

"Wait…what?"

"Okay, here me out," he started, "To each other, we're a couches. Our personalities mingle beautifully and it's awesome. So for years we've been in this effortless friend end of the couch…and I don't know…for me I guess I was satisfied with it until you left for that camp. When you came back…I don't know…I realized something. I guess I was just tired of the…ugh I don't know how to word this. I'm rambling. I'm tired."

"Going out with you was like sitting on a new couch."

"Yeah," he yawned, "kind of like that."

They fell back into silence for another few minutes until she asked, "What did Enishi say to you that Friday in P.E.?"

She waited a few moments for his response. Thinking he was sleep, she closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep.

"He said that he was going to have sex with you, territory that I haven't crossed," he admitted in a quiet voice, making her wake up.

She bit her lip, not able to think of anything to say. It was left unsaid that Kenshin would've never said something like that to anyone, including his friends.

"I have a confession too," he added. "A few months after you dumped me…I began hooking up with Yumi. It was purely casual…but I figured that you should know."

"I know – Yumi told me today…or yesterday. Whatever." There was a minute-long silence. "Why would you tell me that?"

"Because I didn't want you to feel left out, I guess." He groaned. "I'm so not making any sense. Good night, sweet dreams,"

"Good night," she said. She took a deep breath, smelling his pillowcase of his scent before falling asleep.

* * *

Kaoru loved sleeping in Kenshin's bed. She never told him that, but it was a secret pleasure of hers. She loved how it was a queen bed, so she could spread out as much as she liked. She also loved the navy blue sheets, giving a calming effect.

She slowly opened her eyes. Stretching, she touched one of the wooden bedposts and looked at the ceiling.

It was Thursday – only three more days of vacation. Three more days left of perfect bliss. She didn't want to go back to the real world – she just wanted to stay in this bed and lay with Kenshin and just talk, not having to worry about anything.

She looked over to the bench and sighed – he looked so innocent. His hands were curled below his chin and his lips were slightly parted. The blanket rested over his waist, he probably pushed it away during the night, as he always liked his upper body to be free.

He gave a deep sigh and tried to stretch, but the wall constricted his legs and he bent them once again. She smiled as she sat up. Pulling the covers off, she pointed her toes to stretch again before swinging her legs over the edge. She stood up and tiptoed toward him, kneeling in front of him.

She studied his face for a few moments, taking in his fine features. Her fingers brushed his bangs away from his face, only to have them fall back.

Her eyes fell on his lips and she froze. She always knew that she carried more-than friendly feelings towards Kenshin, but she never thought they were that bad until this moment. She allowed herself to lightly graze her fingers over his face, from his forehead to push the strands of hair back to his temple to his cheek...

She pulled away and sighed. It was so wrong of her to do this to him. She backed away from him and went back to his bed. His iPod was to her left, and she took it with curiosity.

She looked at the top twenty-five most played playlist. Most of them were Beatles songs, but one in particular stood out to her: "Dark Blue" by Jack's Mannequin. He liked Jack's Mannequin, but not enough for him to play any of its songs a large number of times.

She put the iPod back in the duct and pressed play.

"_I feel, I feel you breathing down my neck, breathing down my neck_,"

She felt it. She could feel him. When she closed her eyes she could remember the last time she felt him behind her, holding her. She let the tune overpower her, her muscles becoming languid once more.

She looked over at him after the second chorus and gasped. He was staring her, and with the sun shining from behind him, his eyes were luminous.

Kenshin and Enishi had similar eyes in the sense that they had an ability to read the emotions in her own. Except Kenshin's were more in tune with hers than anyone – his eyes were softer, more understanding, with a longer-lived intensity.

As the tempo increased in the song, her pulse increased. The way he was looking at her…

When the song went back to its normal tempo, she let out a breath she didn't know she was holding and looked back up at the ceiling. She knew why he listened to that song so many times, and it made her sad.

"You know…I never really paid much attention to this song until you left," he said in a hoarse voice that made her shiver.

"I like it," she whispered. "It's good."

He nodded as he rubbed his eyes. "Did you sleep well?"

"Of course – who doesn't love sleep in a queen-size bed?"

He smiled. "Yeah, I love that bed. This bench? Not so much…" He began stretching, but his legs hit the wall again. "Ugh, I want to stretch, but I don't want to get up."

"How about this…you stand up really quickly…and lay here," she suggested, patting the empty space beside her.

"Oh…I don't know…it's so far away."

She laughed before staring at him. "I have to buy Ayame a gift…for her bat mitzvah," she said after a moment.

"Oh…do you want to go out later to find one?"

"Yeah, yeah...hey do you think that we could possibly do like...a giant gift from the two of us?"

Kenshin sucked in his breath through his teeth. "Yeah...sorry, I would, but she personally asked me what she wanted as a gift."

"Oh, and what's that?"

"She would...love it...if I were to sing a song on the big day...and record a few of her favorite songs on a CD."

"Like...your songs...or covers?"

"Both. I did...three of the band's songs...I recorded with them a few weeks ago...and I did covers for Dashboard Confessional, Death Cab For Cutie, and The Beatles."

"Which songs?"

"Oh...'Hands Down'...'I Will Follow You Into The Dark'… -" he stopped when he saw her smiling. "What?"

"I remember you singing 'Hands Down.' It was on that Weston beach...by the boardwalk. The whole...band...and Yumi...Misao...the whole gang was there and you and Sou just started playing. It's...a fond memory."

He smiled. "Oh, yeah, I remember now. You stared at me the entire time. I'm surprised you remember Sou playing harmony," he sad in a teasing voice.

"Shut up. You have no idea how charming you really are when you play that acoustic."

"Oh really now?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, totally. I bet...that _if_ First Absolute...becomes famous or whatever...your live sessions are going to be sick."

She lost her breath when she saw the look of pure joy on his face, something that she hadn't seen in over a year. "Thanks, I appreciate that."

"Yeah...just make sure that you actually release acoustic albums...I hate that when bands that are so good acoustic only do one or two songs. It's annoying."

He grinned. "You betcha - I'm going to name the first one specifically after you to boot."

She flushed and cleared her throat. "So...'I Will Follow You Into the Dark'...I've never heard you sing that one...and I didn't know that she liked them."

"She doesn't, but she likes that one. She heard me humming it one night."

"I want to hear you sing it," she said, crossing her legs.

He sighed, but reached for his acoustic lying on the ground. Taking it out of his case, he checked the chords to see if it was in tune. Once tweaked, he stood up and walked toward the bed. She lied down on it and he followed suit, except he rested his head on her stomach instead so he was perpendicular to her. She didn't expect him to do that, but she allowed him to lie there.

Playing the first few chords, she closed her eyes and breathed deeply. He made the song so sincere – hearing the lyrics out of the mouth of a seventeen-year-old made it seem sweeter. She wished she could have his version on her iPod; she wished she could have all his songs with her always.

When he ended it, she said, "Maybe I'll just go shopping on Saturday. Might as well."

She could feel stomach vibrate with his chuckling. "Yeah. Come up with something creative." He began playing some chords from another song that she couldn't recognize.

"Well, I don't know if I could beat the recording a CD thing...but it can't be _that _bad."

"So...do you want breakfast? I still make amazing chocolate chip pancakes – Shina style."

Kaoru grinned. "Yeah, most definitely. I just need to call my parents - I was supposed to call them yesterday...but the whole paintball thing distracted me."

"Yeah, no probs, you can use the house phone if you want - surprise Hiko with the phone bill."

"Oh, aren't you a nice son."

He stuck out his tongue as he stopped playing and got off the bed. "Come downstairs. My dad's probably out so he won't complain about the smell - he hates chocolate chip pancakes."

"Nope - I'm still here," Hiko called out, scaring the both of them.

"Dad? What the hell - you have work!"

"Yeah, but you two chatting away at one o'clock in the morning didn't make me fit to go to work at seven. You know I have other shit to do in the morning before I leave."

"Language - Kaoru's here."

"I know. Hi Kaoru, nice to have you back here."

"Hi Hiko," Kaoru said with a smile.

Kenshin sighed as he walked toward the door. "We're still making pancakes, I don't care."

She laughed as she followed him down the stairs. "We could just have eggs."

"No, now I want to piss him off. If he didn't say anything, and I just saw him in the kitchen, I probably wouldn't have made them. But now that he did that, I'm totally going to."

"You are such a little boy."

"Probably, but hey, I'm allowed that, right? I'm still seventeen. The only thing I can do is go to a rated R movie by myself. Don't really have that many responsibilities, except to dad, you know, make sure I don't get myself killed or anything, bear him more grief."

"That's still a heavy responsibility as a kid," she said, stopping halfway down the stairs.

He sighed. "Yeah...but it's not really a responsibility for me...it's kind of a necessity, you know? It would be so stupid for me to fuck my life up by doing what my brother did - drugs...all that shit. It's not worth it at all."

"Drunk driving," she added in a low voice.

Kenshin looked at her. "No, that was the one thing Sozo never did - he _never_ got behind the wheel intoxicated and he never got into a car with an intoxicated driver. After what happened to mom…because of that accident, she got that aneurysm. It happened simply from a bump on the head."

"How do you know that? That Sozo never drove drunk."

"Because I remember one night...we were in eighth grade and Sozo was a junior. Dad was...in his room...the lights were on. I knew he had woken up and was waiting for him because it was, like, three in the morning and he never comes home later than two. And…I remember him opening the front door and I peaked out and I saw he was just..._soaked_ with sweat. And he was so out of breath. Dad came down, asked what the hell he was doing. And Sozo said, 'I ran ten miles home because I couldn't get into the car with friend who was hammered.' And he just walked right past him to the shower."

"Wow...I'm..."

"Shocked? I'm not. See, even though he was a total prick in high school, he was still a good kid...very deep down."

"You didn't think so before. Remember all those times you ranted about what a bastard he was?"

"Yeah, he was a total asshole. But...my mom raised him." He shrugged. "She wouldn't raise a kid to be a complete asshole for the rest of his life."

She smiled, continuing down the stairs. The kitchen was empty. He started taking out pans when he asked, "You said that he drunk-called you last year."

"Yeah, last spring break. Funny as hell for a bit of it."

"What did he say?"

She sighed as she helped him find all the ingredients. "Well...he started garbling about stuff that I couldn't understand...but...he did manage to say thanks for brother...taking care of...me being an asshole...something incoherent."

He smiled. "That's nice."

"Yeah, I thought it was bullshit until I saw him with you on that Wednesday after school."

"Oh, so _that's_ why you collapsed."

"Fuck you - it was beyond touching. Two brothers...reconciling after years of silence."

"Wow, you just made it into a soap opera. It's not...that big of a deal. I mean, we're talking, yeah, but...we're not..."

"Yeah, yeah, you've said that before. I'm tired of hearing your bullshit - just make the pancakes."

"Ouch, you hurt me." He began cracking eggs and adding flour and water.

"Yeah, well, don't feed me bullshit."

He sighed. "Okay, maybe...we've reconciled. But it's going to take awhile for us to be close. I don't even know if we can be close. I feel like when we're together...it's like two, cold, British old men meeting after twenty years of not seeing each other. It's kind of awkward...but there's that air of familiarity that keeps us together. And the memories."

"Whoa, that's quite the analogy."

"He's not a warm person."

"You are."

"Yeah, with strangers. Getting close I kind of get like him...but in a more friendly way, I guess. Distant…but still approachable at the same time."

"Yeah, I suppose so. But...you're only friends with a certain number of people. You have a close group of friends, but even they are kept at a distance, and everyone else is a friendly acquaintance."

He nodded as he began stirring. "Yeah, but you forgot one other group."

"What's that? Enemies? Like Enishi?"

"No…you. In the network of the people that I associate with, with me being in the center and everyone else outside...you're the only one that's inside the circle...if that makes any sense."

"Kenshin..."

"Look, even though we haven't been friends for the past year, I still considered you my best friend. You know more about me than anyone else. And I like to think that I know a lot about you too."

"You do. A lot more than...what a normal guy should know," she said, taking a step closer.

"So...can you make me a promise, Kaoru?"

"Yeah, what?"

"Promise me...that...when we get back to school...we can be friends. Like...the way that we used to be. I mean, yeah, it can't be just like it was before...but...I miss hanging out with you for fun, you know? And if your friends can't handle us just being good friends, then we have some issues. Or frankly, you have issues with your friends. Because honestly...I know I shouldn't judge you and you've told me that...but...I've been your childhood friend for _years_. If they can't accept that, then...they're not worth it."

She took a deep breath before nodding. "Okay. Friends at school."

"I'm _serious_. I'm tired of pretending the past...almost _ten_ years of our lives didn't happen for you. You know that I played jaded ex for _you_. I kept my distance and didn't attack you about it for _you_."

"Oh..."

"When you first broke up with me...I just thought that you were freaked out. I mean, we almost did it and it's scary, it _was_ scary. So...I assumed that you just needed to cool off, get yourself together, and then we could take things slower. It would last a month, at the absolute most." Then he laughed, but it held no happiness. "And then you stared going out with _him_."

"Kenshin, stop. I get it - it was really wrong of me."

He placed the bowl of ignredients on the counter. "You're damn right it was - Kaoru, you broke my heart."

Tears filled her eyes. "Please, stop, I know, I know, I'm a horrible person. I've been beating myself over it this week, I'm _so_ sorry." She pulled him into a tight hug. "I could never expect your forgiveness...but..." She blinked and the tears poured down her face.

He pulled her close and sighed. "Kaoru...you need to figure out what you want."

"I want this, I want you in my life," she choked back a sob, "I want to stop lying to people, I want to be fully comfortable with all my friends, I want to..."

"Shush, it's okay..." he said soothingly, rubbing her back.

"It disgusted me going out with him for the first two months. I hated myself so much. I felt like I was cheating on you."

He smiled a little. "Well that's good, because it felt like I was cheated on."

She sniffled. "I suck. I'm the worst person in the entire world. No smart girl would ever do that to a guy like you. You're a class act, you know? Girls would kill for guys like you."

"Ah, the good guys finished last though."

"I thought Enishi was a good guy."

Kenshin pulled away from her and sighed. "I...cannot believe that I'm going to defend this son of a bitch...but he did care for you. Yes, in a heartbeat I would say he's a jackass and a complete phony. But...I can't deny the way he has treated you. For the past year he's been good to you. He respected you. And I bet, and hope, he realizes what a total shithead he was for doing that, because he should know that you're one of the good ones. You're hard to come by."

She let out a shaky breath and tried to smile. "I should…call my parents now…" she said, trailing off. She then found herself stroking his cheek for a few moments before walking over to the phone.

His hand was on his cheek when she dialed her dad's cell phone.

"_Kaoru where are you?"_ he sounded very angry.

She looked at Kenshin. "I'm at Kenshin's house. I slept over – I'm sorry."

"_You could've called us!"_

"I went paintballing – I'm sorry. I haven't been home." She found it rather strange that her father didn't yell at her about sleeping over at a boy's house. "Can I just talk to mom?"

There was a shuffle on the other end until she heard her mother's voice. _"How does Enishi feel about this? You sleeping over your ex-boyfriend's house?_"

She remained silent as she looked away from Kenshin's searching gaze. "He doesn't know," she whispered.

"_Kaoru…what's going on?"_ her mother asked after a minute of silence.

She felt her face turning hot and tears sting in the back of her eyes. Kenshin walked up to her and took the phone out of her grasp.

"Mrs. Kamiya! Good morning! How are you?" he greeted her in a cheerful voice. Pause. "Oh, she's fine, she's just going through some emotional problems." Kaoru snorted as he listened to her mother. "Ah, well, Enishi was a total son of a bitch." She bit her lip as there was a long pause. "I don't know – I believe she's on the fence." Pause. He smiled. "Yes, yes, I will. Have a good day!" He hung up and grinned at her. "I have an idea – today why don't you write a list about what you want? I have to go over to Sano's house for last minute stuff for tomorrow…but we'll hang out tonight. Or…you can come over at lunch time and bring us sandwiches."

She slapped him on the arm. "_Maybe_ I'll visit you…don't count on the sandwiches. What am I – your servant?"

"No, but I would be extremely thankful," he said, stirring the previously forgotten mixture. "I mean, I'm making you a great breakfast here."

"You're just being a good host."

"That may be true, _but_…it would just be _so_ nice of you…"

She sighed. "_Maybe_."

"Okay, fine," he said with a knowing smirk.

* * *

On his way over to Sano's house for the day, he thought of his list of things _he_ wanted.

1. Kaoru Kamiya

2. Fuck everything else.

* * *

A/N: I've been taking care of my sick family (first my mom caught a stomach virus, then my sister caught a stomach flu…it wasn't fun) and then I got sick with a fever - I just got better tonight.

Please review!

MissGoalie


	12. Vacation: 7

A/N: I'm sorry about the late updates across the board – my family is going through a bit of a crisis regarding my grandma.

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 7

Kenshin hadn't talked yet. When he picked Kaoru up from her house at around three o'clock, he wouldn't communicate with her until they got back to his house to use paper and pencil. He said (wrote) that he was saving his voice for later. He was only talking when absolutely necessary. He didn't tell her that he'd barely slept the night before.

The time First Absolute was to step on stage was 9:30. They were the sixth band to perform, which Kenshin said was a good, since people were going to be stuck in traffic to get to this town, which meant that people would be catching the tail end of the event.

At around half past six, while the band and Kaoru were watching _Rush Hour_, Kenshin got a call on his cell phone. He didn't recognize the number.

"Hello?"

"_Kenshin?_"

Kenshin froze for a moment before asking, "How did you get this number?"

"_Misao gave it to me_._"_

"Oh…well…hey, Yumi. I'll admit this is rather strange…but what's up?"

He heard crackling on the other end and a shuddering breath. _"I'm sorry, Kenshin, but I can't see you tonight. I want to, believe me, but…"_

"What's going on? Are you okay?" he asked, his mind whirling with the worst possibilities: sickness, death…

"_My mom's fed up with me – she's sending me off to my dad's. I'm on lockdown until the end of the year."_

He froze again. Except this time, every part of his body felt numb and his insides felt hollowed out. It seemed as if the world had stopped turning.

"_Say something, please…you always know the perfect thing to say," _she whispered, almost inaudible.

He stood up and walked out of the room everyone was in. He kept walking until he was outside on his front step. "What the hell am I supposed to say, Yumi?" he said, but in a soft voice.

Yumi choked. _"I don't know – I don't know what to do – I can't live with my dad…he lives in the middle of fucking _nowhere_. My whole life is here…I can't handle this."_

He used his free hand to run through his hair. "Yumi…oh my God…I…" He found himself clutching his hair, unable to do anything else. "What am I supposed to do without you?" he whispered, trying to stop the back of his eyes from stinging.

"_Oh you'll be fine – you're totally on the mends with Kaoru. You never needed me anyway."_

For the first time in all his time knowing her, he was angry with her. After everything he shared with her…about his family, his friends, Kaoru, his _life_…in the end she _still_ didn't understand. It made him more upset than just leaving – the fact that he was most likely never going to see her again made it that much worse.

"_Kenshin?"_

He swallowed. "I…have to go. I need to…pull myself together for tonight."

"_Good luck…even though you won't need it."_

He closed his eyes and held onto their connection for a few moments before closing his phone. Screwing his eyes shut, he crouched onto his knees and tried to breathe. His hands ran through his hair and stopped at the base of his ponytail. He stayed like this until her heard footsteps from the other side of the door. He straightened himself up and wiped his cheeks before the door opened.

It was Kaoru.

"Hey…what happened? Are you okay?" she asked.

He inhaled shakily and nodded. "Yeah, fine."

"Doesn't sound fine."

"She's leaving."

"_What?_"

"She's on lockdown until she moves in with her dad in some random state…"

He heard her gasp. "Oh my God…"

"…I don't know what to do. She…was like a rock to me. Now it's like she has liquidated into water."

She bit her lip and was about to say something until the rest of the band came out to join them.

"Hey, what did Yumi want?" Yahiko asked.

Kenshin swallowed and said calmly, "She's going to live with her dad…she's not coming tonight."

Soujiro sighed. "I told her to be nice to her mother."

The somber silence that was there shifted into a shocked silence. "Ex_cuse_ me?" Kaoru blurted.

"What the _fuck_? Okay, what did you just _happen_ to forget to tell us?" Sano demanded, directing a glare in Soujiro's face.

"It happened last night! Jesus…" Soujiro said in an uncharacteristically impatient tone.

"What does '_it_' mean?" Yahiko asked.

"_It_ means…she came over to my house last night…"

"Yeah…"

"Ugh, do I need to give you all the details?"

Yahiko and Sano both started wolf calling before laughing, slapping Soujiro on the back. "Way to go!"

Kenshin on the other hand looked very confused. "I have no idea what to say."

"Really? I'm surprised. But I suppose this is rather strange…" Soujiro said, trying to get away from Sano and Yahiko.

"It's cool. She seems really into you. Besides, it was made clear in the beginning that it was purely casual for us."

"Yeah…I guess it was the same with us. I think she was just overly curious about me or something."

Sano elbowed Soujiro. "Now who's the bad boy?"

Soujiro pushed Sano away. "I didn't do it because I could. I _do_ like her. I respect her."

"We know, we know," Kaoru said, smiling, getting over the shock of the situation.

They heard Kenshin's phone ring from his back pocket. Kenshin was still smiling as he answered it.

"_Kenshin, there's been a change in plans – we need you backstage in about ten minutes._"

The smile slipped right off his face. "What? What do you mean? What's going on?"

"_Stab My Paranoia is stuck in major traffic – they're not going to make it. Your band is the closest to the hall…we can't stall any longer._"

Kenshin let out a breath. "We'll be over as fast as we can."

"_Hurry!_"

Kenshin hung up and looked to the band. "Is the van packed?"

"Yeah, for the most part," Yahiko answered.

"Good…because we need to leave. Right now."

"_What?_ Why?" Sano exclaimed.

"Because Stab My Paranoia didn't account for Friday night traffic. I'll be down in two minutes – I'm going to change right now," Kenshin said while he was on his way up the stairs.

* * *

"Yahiko – get out of the driver's seat. Desperate times calls for desperate measures – Sano, get behind the wheel," Kenshin said, trying to fix the collar of his blazer. Kaoru slapped his hands away and fixed it for him.

"Hell yeah, we're getting there in seven minutes _tops_," Sano said, climbing over into the driver's seat.

Kaoru gripped Kenshin's hand for dear life as Sano sped out of the driveway, tires screeching.

By the time they reached the music club, Soujiro looked to be shell-shocked and Kaoru was plastered to Kenshin, her hands shaking.

"You…just cut…a fifteen minute ride…down to _five minutes_. Who gave you your license?" Kaoru managed to say, trying to pull herself off Kenshin.

"You'll thank me later – we need to get on now if we want to perform or not," Sano said, already unloading the back.

The manager of the club came running out to meet them, her hair looking disheveled. "Thank God you're here!" She began pulling Kenshin away toward the stage. "The mikes aren't working right now and I don't know why when the previous band –"

Kenshin put his hands on her shoulders. "Relax. It's all going to be fine. Don't panic." He looked over his shoulder to see the other three members of the band unloading Yahiko's drumset. "Okay, I'll help fix the mikes – get someone to help these guys, won't you?" With that, he sped into the club through the back door, quickly followed by Kaoru.

"I'm a lucky charm with these kind of things," she explained when he gave her a questioning look.

They walked on stage to find almost half of the room full, which disappointed him. Although the room was bigger than Strathmore Hall (at least twice its size), it wasn't what he imagined. At his original time, the room would be near bursting (as it always would be at that hour).

He pushed his feelings aside and just tried to fix the mikes. Kneeling in front of the amp, he fiddled with switches before coming up and saying, "Does this thing work, _yet_?" and coming back.

"Hey! It's that guy from First Absolute!" Kenshin heard one person from the audience yell.

He grinned and saluted to the audience in general, and was greeted with a nice little applause. Kaoru smiled as she went around to check the main cord and nearly smashed her head.

"Kenshin? The main cord is kind of…broken…" she said, pointing to the tear.

"Are you kidding? Jesus Christ…" he muttered. "Can you go to the storage room and find one? You know, it's the one by –"

"I remember, " she said, cutting him off and walking away.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"I thought you guys were performing later!" another person said from the audience.

Kenshin turned toward everyone and shrugged. "Change of plans – Stab My Paranoia is performing at our original time."

Another person then exclaimed, "What! That's bullshit! I have to call people now – they were only coming to the end because you, Losing Marbles, and Assuming Hump of the Suburban Slam are performing then!"

"Oh, Assuming Hump is actually coming?" Kenshin asked, surprised.

"Yeah…they weren't going to?"

Kenshin shifted his weight. "Yeah, it was something about their guitarist Sakura…she had some issues involving her step-brother who's in Acid Fury…I have no idea. Pure rumor, maybe."

He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to find Kaoru standing there. "I replaced it, go check it."

He let out a big sigh of relief and impulsively kissed her forehead. "Thank you," he said before going over to the mike.

"This better work…" he said, happy that his voice was finally magnified.

There was a scattered round of applause. The rest of First Absolute joined Kenshin on stage as they slid the drums onto it.

It was then Kenshin noticed the judges that were congregated near the side of the room, watching him. The table was near the front of the room, but people were currently sitting on it. He wasn't so sure he liked the idea of having judges be right in his field of vision, but he supposed he was going to have to deal with it. After all, this was his dreaming unfolding, right?

"Kenshin, go tune our guitars – manager's blowing a fuse," Soujiro said, wiping off beads of sweat as he stood up and stretched his back.

"Right."

With that, Kenshin ran off stage to tune Soujiro's guitar.

"Kenshin?"

"What?" he asked, and she could tell he was a bit hysterical. He was beginning to let out more of his true emotions with she was around. She knew he was feeling beyond stressed, probably more stressed than he had ever been in his life. Not that he was going to admit that.

"It's going to be fine. Once you all step on stage –"

He put down the guitar and stared at her, "Please, stop. Just…silence…would be great right now. Your presence is enough for me."

She promptly closed her mouth and watched him fiddle with tuners until Soujiro joined Kenshin and started tuning the other guitar. Kaoru found it quite a nice picture – each tuning the other's guitar. It was almost like a picture of brotherhood.

"You ready?" Soujiro asked, holding out Kenshin's blue guitar.

Kenshin stared at it, looked at Kaoru, then looked back at Soujiro and smiled. "Yeah, let's do it."

At that moment, a few people walked through the back door. When Kenshin's recognized them, he nearly dropped his guitar to the floor: it was the members of Stab My Paranoia, who were supposed to be stuck in traffic, and his brother Sozo.

"_You're_ the band that took their place?" Sozo asked Kenshin after a few moments of tense silence, pointing to the lead singer standing next to him.

"You're actually _friends_ with these people?" Kenshin asked in response.

Sano and Yahiko came from the other side of the curtain and stared at the scene before them. "I thought you guys were stuck in traffic," Sano asked calmly. He was ready to kill.

The bassist shrugged. "Cleared up. We've never performed here – we didn't know how close we were."

Sano's hands balled into fists. "Bastards," he hissed under his breath.

Sozo was looking in between the two bands, his brow furrowed. "What the fuck, man?"

The bassist shrugged again. There was no explanation for this, none that would satisfy Sozo, anyway.

Sozo shook his head. "You know what? Last straw. Fuck you guys. Fuckin' nobodies trying to ruin good people," he said, immediately writing them off, walking past them to Kenshin. "Good luck, Ken. Impress me," he added, patting Kenshin on the back before walking through the curtain to the audience.

"You know what? Try finding a ride home, you bitch!" the bassist yelled after Sozo, who stuck up his middle finger.

Soujiro glared at the bassist, a sight that was quite scary to behold, and hissed, "Shut the _fuck_ up and get out of here – you're not up for another three hours."

Yahiko, Sano, and Kaoru looked at Soujiro in complete shock. Had that boy ever swore before?

The bassist grinned and held up his hands. "Whatever." Stab My Paranoia stalked out, and when the door shut behind them, Soujiro let out a breath.

There was nothing to say. They silently walked on stage, led by Kenshin. Kaoru quickly got out to the audience, standing toward the side a bit, near a woman who looked very bored. She almost wanted to slap her, demand her attention to the stage where a band with the biggest heart was about to play.

The judges shooed the kids away from their table and took their seats – it was American Idol style – a woman in between two men, and the judge farthest from Kaoru looked the cruelest.

The middle judge raised her eyebrows at the boys on stage. "Stab My Paranoia?" she called out over the chatter.

"No – First Absolute," Kenshin answered with a little smile.

She shrugged and waved a hand at them, signaling them to start playing.

What was kind of different about First Absolute was that they didn't start by Yahiko's banging on his drumsticks. It started silently with Kenshin tapping his foot against the stage, with Sano and Soujiro's heads nodding along. He did this because when they actually start playing, it grabbed everyone's attention at the sudden noise.

She fell for it every single time.

The guitar rifts were addicting. They couldn't be classified as simply catchy, alternative rock. There was a sort of uniqueness to it that made it deeper than just a collection of chords put together for the ear's pleasure.

_Feel those feelings you try to hide,_

_And maybe will you wait around for me?_

_Never giving up, but you can't pretend,_

_Forever everything's okay,_

_When it seems like every moment,_

_Your smile's fading away._

The chorus. It made Kaoru's heart skip a lot of beats. So this was why he wanted to wait until this moment. She didn't know whether to be angry, happy, or something else entirely, but she knew that she shouldn't be surprised – he would do something like this.

"_You know me just all too well and/it shows, well you caught my every move_," Kenshin crooned into the microphone, shredding on his guitar.

She couldn't stop staring at his face – the way he closed his eyes during certain words or phrases, the way his the muscles in his forearms flexed when he played, the way he looked so damn good in dark jeans…

It suddenly slowed a bit after the second round of the chorus. There was Soujiro playing a simple pattern of chords and Sano playing softly in the background. He looked directly at her as he sang:

_So tell me who you think you are right now,_

_And tell me where I stand._

_The shadows cast by my frustration shows,_

_That you are still my world._

She couldn't breathe – she couldn't let the air that lodged itself in her throat. Even when Yahiko joined them, she still couldn't bare to move, because if she did, she knew she would become undone.

_And we will wait until the end_

_Will you forgive me again?_

_And can you hear, my heart beats loud?_

_We'll be together I know somehow._

The chorus was song one last time before the ending notes faded. His eyes never left hers.

The audience cheered generously, making her heart soar. She looked over to the woman who looked so unhappy to be there in the beginning, and was shocked and upset to see she wasn't there. Trying to shake it off, she clapped as Kenshin saluted; Soujiro and Yahiko bowed their heads, Sano waved a hand.

The band then became focused on removing Yahiko's drum set. Kaoru was finally able to move, and she went backstage, passing the club manager who had finally calmed herself down, and running into the woman who was standing next to Kaoru during First Absolute's song.

The woman looked relatively young; with her twenties-styled haircut and youthful brown eyes, she seemed friendly now. She smiled when she saw Kaoru.

"You know the band that just played?" she asked, pointing at the door that Kenshin and the boys were on the other side of.

"Yeah…known them for a long time. I'm Kaoru Kamiya…their manager," Kaoru greeted, shaking the woman's hand. It felt good to take back her old title.

"Cho Watanabe," she answered. Kaoru smiled. "I know, Cho like from _Harry Potter_, and Watanabe the actor. Get it a million times," Cho continued, rolling her eyes in a good-natured way.

"So…why are you here? Do _you_ know them?"

At that moment, the boys exited backstage and joined Kaoru and Cho. Kenshin looked between the two with curiosity. "What's going on?" he asked before wiping his temple.

"I was just talking to your manager here," Cho said, nodding toward Kaoru. Kenshin looked at Kaoru and a huge smile graced his face, making her knees turn to jello.

He shook his head a little and his smile faded into something softer. "I'm sorry, who are you?" he asked Cho politely.

"Cho Watanabe."

The smile came back again. "Cho from _Harry Potter_ and Watanabe from _The Last Samurai_…very cool. I'm Kenshin Himura. This is Soujiro Seta, Sano Sagara, and Yahiko Myojin and we're First Absolute," he pointed to everyone respectively. He then chuckled again. "You must be some sort of super person to have that awesome name."

Cho grinned. "No, I'm actually an agent from Blue Chopstick Records."

Kaoru's jaw nearly touched the floor. The silence was stifling. "Are you serious?" she finally managed to say.

Cho cleared her throat. "I was told of this Battle of the Bands through some friends. I wasn't really that interested to be perfectly honest, but hey, I had nothing to do since my boyfriend is in Japan on business. So here I am, I listen to the first few bands and I just want to kill myself. Where was the originality? The inspiration? It made me kind of sick that these people were considered to be the best within the area." She shook her head, as if trying to forget what she listened to a few hours ago. "And then you boys came on stage…"

Kenshin visibly swallowed. Cho noticed and gave him a comforting smile. "You were great – all of you."

The atmosphere instantly relaxed. "You really _are_ a super person," Kenshin whispered.

"So…what does this mean – you're interested in us?" Sano asked.

"I suppose I am!" Cho said cheerfully. "Except you boys are all underage."

"Oh, we don't care – we'll drop out of school," Yahiko said quickly.

Soujiro scowled at Yahiko. "I'm _not_ dropping out of school, and neither are you, so stop being stupid."

"Exactly. What I want to do ideally is sign you boys after you all turn eighteen…and then we work together for another four years –" Cho was then interrupted by Sano.

"Wait, what do you _mean_ by _four years_?"

Cho scoffed. "I would like you to go through college, of course. This won't be your fulltime job until after college. It's good to have musicians that have intelligence."

Kaoru grinned triumphantly. "_See_, you can go through college and _then_ start working. How many times have I told you this?" she exclaimed, pointing at Kenshin.

Instead of scoffing at her like he usually did, he gave her a soft smile. "I suppose so."

"What do we do in the mean time?" Soujiro asked, stepping forward.

"Well, I would like to talk to you in a few weeks, maybe we can arrange you to record some songs. Very casual."

"Will we need a lawyer present?"

Cho gave Soujiro an amused smile. "No need to get so in detail at this moment. Here's my card," she said, reaching into her pocket and giving him a blue business card, "and call me in about two weeks – I'm going away on vacation in two days."

"Be honest with me…" Kenshin started, suddenly looking vulnerable, "Are we…is this real? Like, do we really have what it takes…I guess is what I'm trying to say?"

Cho looked at everyone, from Yahiko's anxious tapping, Sano's demanding expression, Soujiro's calm face, and Kenshin's raw emotional eyes. She looked moved. "Yes, I'd say so. I'm going to fight for you guys, don't you worry," she said in a serious voice.

Yahiko and Sano were the first to react – by whooping rather loudly. Soujiro let out a breath and grinned. Kenshin looked at his band mates before resting his eyes on Cho and grinning. "Alright, in two weeks we'll give you a call. You don't mind if it's on the weekend, right? You know, being a junior sucks – no free time."

"That's such bullshit, do you don't do your homework," Soujiro mocked.

"As a matter of fact, I do_ too_ do my homework…at least the big assignments, anyway."'

Cho shook her head. "Well, I'm going to go – leave on a good note."

"You're not going to stay and see the other bands?" Kenshin asked, making Cho laugh.

"Huh…you're serious? Wow…you're very different from a lot of musicians."

"Well, I feel like I'm going to wake up to my alarm clock," he admitted.

She smiled at him and patted his shoulder. "It's very real. Congratulations – you've officially moving on from the garage-band stage." She turned on her heel and smiled at Kaoru before leaving.

After a few moments, Sano and Yahiko started screaming. They soon joined hands (and grabbed Soujiro and Kenshin) and started dancing in a circle, looking absolutely ridiculous. Kaoru started laughing, choking on her own tears and she watched them. This was one sight she swore she'd never forget.

And then Kenshin broke away from the group and started hugging Kaoru. She squeezed him back tightly, grinning.

She didn't realize what had happened next until she felt his lips on hers. He pulled away just as fast, still smiling in euphoria. It took them both a few seconds to remember what year they were in.

She pulled a strand of her hair behind her ear and smiled. "I can't believe it – you totally proved me wrong."

"We have to fucking _celebrate_!" Sano exclaimed, wrapping a long arm around Kenshin's shoulders. "Too bad we can't get drinks here – they actually card you. Let's go out!"

"Wait, I want to talk to my brother since he's alone. He ditched his ride for us," Kenshin said.

"He shouldn't be friends with that ass anyway," Soujiro muttered as they walked out to join the rest of the audience.

As they were searching for Sozo, someone grabbed Kenshin's arm. He looked at the hand, which belonged to an exotic-looking girl with olive skin and green eyes. "You look vaguely familiar…" she said, a pensive expression on her face. "Have we hooked up before?" she asked.

Kenshin's eyes widened as did Kaoru's. "No, I _definitely_ did not."

"Oh," she shrugged while Kaoru let out a breath of relief. "I'm Sumi, by the way."

"Kenshin," he said before it then came to him. "Wait…did you hook up with my _brother_?" Sumi looked at him expectantly. "He's pretty tall, dark hair with bangs that cover one eye? His name's Sozo?"

The girl's eyes widened as a smile came to her face. "_Right_. I _did_ hook up with him – the smoker."

"The _what_?" Kenshin asked incredulously.

"Yeah, I stopped it from getting far – his mouth tasted like shit. Good kisser, though. But _God_ was he sexy. You're pretty hot too…good genes I guess."

He flushed. "That's really weird – he was over for two days and he didn't smoke once."

Sumi's face broke into a smile. "_Really_ now?"

"You weren't supposed to know that," Kaoru muttered.

Kenshin whipped his head to Kaoru. "I _knew_ it! He _did_ visit you! Bastard…"

"How did you know Sozo anyway – do you go to the same school?" Kaoru asked.

"Well…my best friend for about fifteen years is going out with the drummer of Stab My Paranoia…and they all go to school with him so I usually see her at their concerts, consequently seeing him," Sumi explained. "Is Sozo here? I think the bass player is a close friend of his."

"Not anymore – he wrote him off," Kenshin said.

"Yeah, it's actually kind of scary when he ditches you – you're practically dead to him as far as he's concerned," Yahiko added.

"Hey,"

They all looked over to find Sozo standing with his hands in his pockets, looking nonchalant – the perfect picture of ease.

Sumi's face broke into a slow, sensual smile. "Hey. I heard a rumor about you."

"Oh? Pray tell, what were the contents of this rumor?"

She faced her body fully toward him. "The rumor is that you quit smoking. Is this true?"

Sozo's eyes drifted toward Kenshin, who shook his head and gazed at Kaoru. After a moment, Sozo shrugged. "That's legit."

"I don't know if I believe that," Sumi said, putting her hands on her curvy hips, giving him a look.

Sozo took a step closer. "Care for me to prove it?"

"Yeah."

Sozo shrugged again. "Okay," he said before closing the gap between them and ravishing her lips in front of everyone. Sumi's hands quickly moved to his neck while his moved to her hips.

Kenshin's jaw dropped as he looked at Kaoru, who merely raised her eyebrows.

"Okay…well…we'll be around for a bit…bye Sozo…" Kenshin said awkwardly, backing away with everyone else as the couple continued to make out. Sozo waved one of his hands, signaling them to back off.

After they created space between them, Sano whistled. "She was hot."

"Yeah, your brother can snag _any_ girl," Yahiko said.

"And she's actually decent – she somehow got him to cut smoking," Soujiro added. He looked up at the stage and found the next band getting ready. "Who are they?"

"Mind's Eye – they're kind of techno-ish," Yahiko answered. "Cool beats."

"So…what are we doing? Are we going out and then coming back? Are we staying?" Sano asked.

"You guys go out – Kaoru and I'll catch up with you in a bit," Kenshin said.

Soujiro stared at the two of them before shrugging. "Okay, just text us or something," he said as he led Sano and Yahiko out of the club.

Kenshin smiled and shook his head. "This is all vey surreal."

Kaoru smiled back. "Yeah, it does," she said, looking into his eyes as the band started playing.

If there was one thing that Kaoru was sure she loved of Kenshin was the brightness and complexity of what solely resided in his eyes. That perfect shade of violet that always remained her favorite color long after she left him at his front step.

But in this moment there was a darkness in his eyes, an intensity of focus that was almost intimidating. But more than that, it was truly something else, something remarkable…something arousing.

Kaoru's breath caught in her throat. Kenshin ran one slender hand softly over the side of her face, catching his fingers up in her hair and twisting loose strands through them. Kaoru bit her lip, the softness of his touch turning her muscles to liquid, and she let her breath back out. His hand trailed down to her jaw line and across her collarbone. She looked in his eyes and saw the color of deep amethyst, and felt his warm breath upon her face.

Kaoru's breath deepened and her heart pounded in her throat. For a moment time stopped, and she knew that she couldn't have resisted even if she wanted to, but she knew that would've never happened – she wanted him and _only_ him. Nobody could take his place, no matter how hard she tried to make someone else fit in it.

He brought his mouth down, just barely grazing her lips with his own. Be she managed to freeze, looking up at him.

"You owe me, remember?" he said barely above a whisper. Then he kissed her.

His kiss was soft and purposeful, and she took a moment to catch her bearings before she could kiss him back. He tasted sweet, and as the feelings rushing from him like vapor overtook her, she found her hands gripping his sides, and then running through his long hair.

He smiled against her lips for a moment before deepening the kiss, revealing his over-wrought impatience waiting for her. All she could do was kiss him back fervently, realizing that she missed him as much as he missed her.

"Hey, _hey_! Take it out to your car," Sozo called out in Kenshin's ear. Kenshin groaned in her mouth before pulling away and glaring at his brother. "Oh, now _that's_ what I call a glare."

"What do you want?" Kenshin very nearly growled.

"Just saying that you have plans with your boys – go celebrate."

"What are you, stalking me now? Shove off," Kenshin answered rather rudely before kissing Kaoru again, and she had no complaints.

"Hey, don't you fucking talk back to me, you little piece of shit. I'm just saying you two are acting disgusting – you're upsetting everybody – get the hell out of here."

Kenshin held up a middle finger, still kissing her.

"Fine, fuck you too."

Kenshin sighed and pulled away again. "Fine, be a double-standard. Let's go, Kao," he said, glaring at his brother before pulling Kaoru by her hand.

Before he could take five steps, Sozo said, "Kenshin!" loudly over the music. Kenshin craned his head over his shoulder. "You were awesome…back there. Never got to tell you."

Kenshin smiled kindly. "Thanks – I appreciate it."

Sozo turned his attention to Kaoru. "Remember what I said last week," he said seriously.

She held Kenshin's hand tighter and nodded. "I do."

She thought she heard him gasp, but she couldn't be sure. Instead, she found herself being led by him outside.

* * *

They got second place – apparently while they were out celebrating, Assuming Hump of the Suburban Slam had played and did a phenomenal job, but they didn't care – they still won five hundred dollars.

Soujiro, Yahiko, and Sano knew better than to continue the celebrations after Battle of the Bands ended – they all parted ways, leaving Kenshin and Kaoru alone. They drove back to her house in silence, and the energy between the two was so intense that it took all her might to keep her hands to herself. This past week she craved his emotional support, his conversation, just being beside him. But now, all she wanted to do was touch him, his face, his lips…any and every part of him, which frightened her, and excited her at the same time.

When they got out of the car, she opened the front door with a shaky hand. She didn't know what to expect, or what to do. After a minute of standing inside, he wordlessly took her hand and they walked up to her room together. Her heart was pounding and her blood hummed in her veins. This was right.

It was going so fast – one moment they were standing in the doorway of her room, the next he was kissing her like he never had before, leading her to her bed, a sort of desperation to his touches. But she was desperate too, she didn't realize how long and hard she pushed away her longings for him until this moment.

In a haze, clothes were removed and bodies were reacquainted with and they soon found themselves in the same position they were over a year ago.

"Kenshin," she whispered, her hands lost in hs red hair, gently making him look into her eyes. She nearly whimpered when she saw his eyes were dark with feelings that she couldn't bare to think of, especially when she wanted to reveal something important to him. "If I wasn't…if I wasn't so frightened of doing it…and if there wasn't so many things that I have to sort out…I would want you to be my first. Right now. If that means anything."

He brought his hand around her waist and pulled her up along with him. His hand was itching to remove her bra and continue what they were doing, but he forced his eyes to look at her.

His eyes lightened to that violet shade that she loved. His lips parted, as if wanting to say something. Instead, he pulled her even closer to him and kissed her.

There was something about that kiss that made her gasp in his mouth. It was so different from every kiss they ever shared. The way it held so much passion made her knees quake.

* * *

He loved her.

When she uttered those words, the realization hit him hard and fast. He almost said the words, but he couldn't bring himself to. It was so raw and new that he couldn't get them past his lips. The only thing he could bring himself to do was snake his hand to the back of her neck and bring her mouth to his, hoping that his unsaid feelings could transfer to her lips.

He lowered her back down to her bed as they picked up where they left off. But as he moved his free hand down below her stomach to where her underwear began, they heard a door slam from the downstairs. They froze in position.

"My parents," she gasped, both ripping themselves apart. He reached for his jeans over the edge of the bed and Kaoru pulled her tossed shirt back on.

"Kaoru! You're up?" they heard her mother call.

"Shit!" she groaned as she pulled on her jeans.

"I need to go to the bathroom," he muttered without looking at her and practically ran into her bathroom, holding his shirt in his hand.

When he shut the door, he screwed his eyes shut and nearly fell to his knees. There was _no_ way he was going to get any sleep. He could still feel her warm hands on his skin, nearly making him groan. He wanted her so badly, but her parents were in the house. Turning on the faucet, he washed his face with cold water and took deep breaths to cool down. From inside the bathroom he heard her parents come into the room.

"Kaoru! We've missed you!" her mother said before pausing. "Who's in the bathroom?" she asked, her voice laced with warning. _She thinks it's Enishi_, Kenshin realized.

"Kenshin. We've been talking," Kaoru answered smoothly, making him almost snort. So good at lying.

"Kenshin?" her parents said at the same time.

He took another breath and put on his shirt before stepping out and smiling at them. "Hi Mr. and Mrs. Kamiya – did you enjoy your vacation?"

Mrs. Kamiya beamed at Kenshin. "Very much, thank you. Oh you look so much better than you did last week."

"Thanks – I feel better."

"So…what have you been doing?" Mr. Kamiya asked, looking between the two.

Mrs. Kamiya grabbed his hand and smiled at her daughter and Kenshin. "We're tired – we'll talk to you tomorrow. See you in the morning,"

Kaoru's parents came over to kiss Kaoru on her cheek. Mr. Kamiya shook Kenshin's hand and Mrs. Kamiya kissed Kenshin on his cheek before leaving them alone, shutting the door behind them.

Kenshin looked at Kaoru and smiled at her, looking tiredly amused. She let out a long breath. "Jesus, my heart was literally jumping out of my chest. Thank God they didn't notice."

He shook his head. "Your mom suspected something. Your dad's a little bit dense though – but he probably forced himself to be that way when it comes to your love life."

She groaned. "Are you serious?"

He laughed a little and brought her into a hug. "I wouldn't worry. But all the same, I'm going home – I'll see you tomorrow."

She closed her eyes and held him tighter. "Tomorrow." When they pulled away, she asked, "Are we going to talk about what happened?"

He shrugged. "I don't know…I mean…what is there to say?"

She sighed. "I guess you're right."

He kissed her cheek softly and whispered in her ear, "Ever thine, ever mine, ever ours."

She shivered a little. He said that after the first time they kissed back in the summer of eighth grade. "Goodnight."

She watched him leave, but she somehow still felt him in the room. It was as almost as if he had left a piece of himself in her room.

Or he had lost it.

* * *

A/N: So…what did you think? Why don't you tell me in a review? I think that's a good plan :)

By the way, did anyone read/finish _Breaking Dawn_? If so, please mention it in a review or PM me!

MissGoalie


	13. Vacation: 8

A/N: Go seniors!

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 8

As expected, Kenshin had a restless sleep. Even after taking three cold showers over the course of the night, he just couldn't forget what had happened a few hours ago.

But it wasn't just the physicality of it.

The fact that twenty-four hours ago he was unable to even _think_ about how deep his feelings went for her, let alone putting a name to it, made him dizzy. Now, it was so easy to say that he loved her, but only in his mind. He couldn't imagine going up to her later and saying, "I love you, I've _always_ loved you…" or something to that effect.

He couldn't imagine her expression were he to say that either. In his wildest dreams, she would throw his arms around him and exclaim, "Yes! I've been waiting for you to say those words! I love you!" and then they would do something involving the two of them in a dark room. But in his nightmares, she would either awkwardly _thank_ him, like in all the television shows out there, or she would say, "I'm in love with Enishi, so…sorry," and then she would run off with him to go into a dark room while he attempted to find all the pieces to his shattered soul.

He wished he could look into her mind to figure out how she would react, but then again, reality bites, and that wasn't possible.

His alarm clock went off at around ten, even though he had been lying in his bed awake for some time. The cash for coming in second place was resting on his nightstand next to his alarm clock. A smile came to his face remembering their performance. But then his thoughts began to shift to Enishi and how that was his goal in life: to make a lot of money and to be successful.

It was pretty similar to Kenshin's goals, save for making money. That was just a bonus.

As he was thinking, he realized that he and Enishi were very similar people. Enishi wanted to be a wealthy lawyer, or some other career that involved politics, to earn success. Kenshin wanted to be part of a band that people listened to on the radio and he wanted to be successful.

It made Kenshin sick to his stomach.

And it didn't help that they both had feelings for the same girl.

He tried viewing the situation from an un-biased perspective: He was the smart-slacker, musician, "free-spirit," and Enishi was the preppy jock, sociable, honor student. Both flawed but generally good guys. Both love the girl. But after too many drinks and being pushed to the limit for over a week, Enishi cheats on the girl. The girl runs to Kenshin because before he became the ex-boyfriend, he was the best friend. But Kenshin wasn't completely good, either. He did manipulate the girl for the past week until she gave in to her confusion and hooked up with him.

So which guy is most worthy of the girl? Enishi – the guy who betrayed the girl in the most horrible way in a drunken-stupor, or Kenshin – the manipulative, bitter, ex-boyfriend who pushed the girl into thinking of things she wasn't ready to deal with?

Bottom line: they both sucked, and didn't deserve to be the scum on the bottom of her shoes.

But Kenshin wanted to believe that he was the easy choice – after all, he had the complex history with the girl, he understood the workings of her mind the best, he was the most in-tune to her. All in all, he had years on Enishi.

But he couldn't deny that Enishi was a good person: although Kenshin saw him as a self-centered prick, it was really because Enishi was confident – he was driven and knew what he wanted. There shouldn't be anything wrong with that – Kenshin knew what he wanted and was confident too in his own way. Plus, there was the fact that Enishi loved her too – Kenshin saw the way he treated her and it did put him at ease at night.

Sure, Enishi did cheat on the girl. Even though it was horrible, it was a one-time mistake, and there should be allowances for that.

With that thought, he nearly laughed out loud.

It all came down to second chances. At the end of the weekend, Kaoru was going to have to come to a decision: give Enishi the second chance that Kenshin should've been given too, or dump Enishi and go back to Kenshin.

The whole thing was pretty damn ironic. Then again, Kenshin did enjoy a little irony…loved it when it didn't pertain to him, to his life. But lately it had and all that did was make him want to give it the finger.

He sat up to go downstairs and eat something.

* * *

Kaoru Kamiya, the obvious choice for President of the Student Assembly, the all-in-all good girl, had hooked up with her slacker of an ex-boyfriend…and enjoyed every moment of it.

She knew it was going to bite her in the ass at some point, but she was beyond caring about the consequences.

Time had definitely made her forget the bliss that involved kissing him. He could single-handedly make the universe shrink around her until there was only him and the feel of his arms around her, and the fire of his lips on hers.

She shivered at the memory on his lips on her neck. If there was one thing she could expect whenever she made out with him, it was that he would always kiss both pulse points on her neck. She used to joke around saying that he was a vampire in a past life, but she secretly loved it; it was almost as if he was kissing her heart, wanting to actually touch the core of her feelings for him.

Oh, God, why did she hurt him? She hurt him over and over for so long – it was unforgiveable.

She sat up and wiped her eyes, pushing blankets off her. Last night she didn't get to properly greet her parents, so she wanted to do that before heading out with Kenshin.

They were sitting in the kitchen: her mother was drinking a cup of coffee and her father was reading the newspaper, his half-finished breakfast in front of him.

"Hi guys, I've missed you," Kaoru said cheerfully, kissing them both on the cheek. She took a seat next to her dad at the table.

"Yeah, we've missed you too – we haven't heard from you a lot. What have you been doing with Kenshin all week? And what about Enishi? What the hell is going on?" her mother asked, her voice fully of curiosity.

Kaoru sighed and crossed her arms on the wooden table. "Enshi and I…I don't know…we ended on a really bad note."

"How so?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Why not?"

"I'm embarrassed."

"Why?"

"Because if I told you what happened, you would wonder why I haven't broken up with him that moment."

"What did he do?" her father demanded.

"You're going to break up with Enishi?" Kaoru wasn't sure if that tone her mother used was hopeful or not.

"I don't know! I'm _really_ confused right now, okay?"

Her mother and father pursed their lips when they heard their daughter's hysterical tone.

"Honey, you know that we'll support you no matter what you do…unless it's doing drugs or something like that because that's a definite _no_," her mother said after a moment.

Kaoru smiled and stood up. "Thanks, I appreciate it. I have to get ready – I know that you guys already got a gift for Ayame…I just want to get her a little something personal…since I used to babysit her with Kenshin."

"And I assume you're going out with Kenshin?"

Kaoru nodded and smiled at them. "I'll be back at around three. I think I'm going to go with Ken to the ceremony since he's the only one in the family invited…"

"No, Hiko was invited – he probably said he couldn't come. You know how he is in public gatherings," her father corrected his daughter. "Ayame's family knows that, it was just a courtesy."

"Hmm, true. Well, I have to get changed. I'll see you later. Love you," she said to the two of them before walking out of the kitchen to her room.

* * *

When she knocked on his door, she had no idea how to act around him. Should she kiss him in greeting? Should she hug him? Awkwardly smile?

He took care of that dilemma by beaming at her, and she couldn't help but grin back, because he looked so carefree for the first time in so long. She hugged him so he wouldn't see the tears in her eyes.

"Hey, what's up?" he asked, rubbing her back.

"Nothing…I just still don't know what to get Ayame."

"Oh, you'll come up with something. You're Kaoru Kamiya after all."

She chuckled and pulled away. "I suppose…it's just all so last minute! I've never been a last minute person."

"That may be true, _but_, there are allowances for everything, right?"

"Right…"

"So…downtown then?"

"Well…I was kind of hoping that I could have some breakfast? I ran out of the house to avoid talking to my parents for very long."

"Yeah, of course, come in. I think there's some Frosted Flakes left over from my brother's visit."

As she walked into the kitchen, she laughed. "Your brother still eats Frosted Flakes?"

"Yeah, but he only eats it at home."

"How do you know?"

He grinned wickedly. "Because every time he comes home, he buys, like, five boxes of cereal: one for his room, three for the kitchen, and one for his car."

He pulled out what seemed to be the last box from the top shelf, given that there was barely any cereal left. She laughed a little as she watched him go on his tiptoes.

"I fucking hate my height," he growled, slamming the box onto the counter.

"You shouldn't – girls don't want guys to be towering over them," she said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

He sighed. "It's still emasculating."

"Trust me, the only thing girly about you is your hair…and your face a little bit…and your eyes…"

"Excuse my language, but fuck you," he said with a smile.

"Hey, it's attractive…you'd be surprised how many girls find you hot," she said in a voice that she didn't recognize. Did it have a hint of jealousy?

He smiled at her as he turned around to open the dishwasher to pull out a bowl. "That may be true, but they don't matter." He gave her the bowl and probed into her eyes with his.

She swallowed and looked away. But then she looked back up and cleared her throat. He noticed her discomfort and masterfully changed the subject. "Do you want to see what people wrote on First Absolute's MySpace? It's really awesome."

"Yeah!" she said, taking the box upstairs, leading him to his room.

When he entered his room and shut the door, she was already on his computer, scrolling down the comments. She turned around and smiled at him. "It's…great."

He nodded. "Yeah, it's really nice."

"I don't see a bad comment anywhere."

"That's because that's only the first page. There are some nasty comments, but whatever, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, that's why the U.S. of A is a beautiful place."

She stood up and moved her way to his bed, where she sat cross-legged and poured herself cereal. She ate with her hands for a few moments. He silently joined her and ate from her bowl.

"Where do you think your brother is?" she asked when she put the box on the floor.

He picked it up to walk across the room to the trashcan next to his computer. "I honestly don't want to think about it. But I think I'm going to call him later."

She took a deep breath when he stopped in front of her, standing. "I know that we kind of…wordlessly agreed not to talk about it…but…why do you think…last night…." She couldn't finish her sentence. The thought of the night before and his hands on her skin made her shiver. "I kind of want to talk about it – it was so…_new_. I never felt that way before."

He thought for a moment. "I think it's because…well…" He felt a little uncomfortable talking about this, but it was something to consider. "We started going out in freshman year – we were _fourteen_. That's young, looking back from now. We knew of…_lust_…and we had a vague understanding of it…but what we had was all heart and soul, you know? Now being seventeen…" he trailed off.

She still had a mask of confusion on her face, still deep in thought.

A smile slowly adjourned his face. "You never felt that way with Enishi," he said with a smirk.

She blanched. "That's – you two –" she stuttered.

He grinned. "That's it. You wouldn't ask it otherwise. You were…hooking up recently. Shouldn't it feel the same or _worse_ even?"

She glared at him, but shouldn't hold it. "It's weird…" she stood up and looked at him. "My body reacts differently to yours."

"It was so much stronger with you – that spark."

"No…I had sparks with Enishi…" she said. He secretly gloated at the use of the past tense. "With _you_…" she trailed off, heat spreading to every nerve of her body.

His smile faded before swallowing. "Like _fire_."

She barely suppressed a groan at the very memory of the other night. His eyes darkened. He stepped closer to her so he could cup her jaw in his hand.

"_Why_?" she whispered.

He didn't like the uncertainty that was still in her eyes, so he tilted her head to press his lips to hers. For a brief moment, he kissed her softly, but soon they were horizontal on his bed, their hands leaving trails of fire on each other's skins.

* * *

"Are you taking the SATs? Or did you take them in March?" Kaoru asked as they were driving around for a parking spot for about the fourth time.

To her immense surprise, he had an embarrassed expression on his face. "What?" she inquired, extremely curious.

"I took them," he stated.

"In March."

"No…in January."

She swore her eyes bugged out. "Are you serious? So much for Mr. I'm not going to college!"

"Hey, I just did it that early because nobody I would know was taking it then, and I took it in a school twenty minutes away from here to be sure. I have a reputation to uphold."

"So…"

"What? You want to know my scores? Kaoru, you already know how high my scores are."

"Over 2,000?"

"Yes."

"…Over 2,100?

He bit his lip with an annoyed expression.

"_Over that_?"

"My brother got 2,340. That should give you a range."

"You wouldn't have remembered that unless you got that score too."

"Huh…so I did."

"Ugh, I hate you."

"High SAT scores mean nothing – my work ethics suck – you're a good student. Colleges don't want kids with perfect SAT scores anymore. If I were born a couple decades ago, I would've gotten into every school I applied to. It's better now."

She sighed. "I didn't do any prep work this week. I was supposed to. I'm sorry, it's just…"

"Hey…it's okay. One week won't kill you. Besides you can always retake it – that's the beauty of this stupid test." His eyes flickered over the parking lot and saw someone beginning to back out on the other side of the parked cars. "SCORE!" he exclaimed, slamming his foot on the pedal and speeding around the corner, leaving Kaoru to grip the door handle for dear life.

"KENSHIN! It's a five mile speed limit! NOT THIRTY-FIVE!"

"We got the spot, right?" he asked, turning on his left flicker as he waited patiently for the red van to pull out. He snickered at the pour soul who drove the speed limit to that spot, only to find Kenshin's car already there.

"I feel bad."

"Hey, it's a dog-eat-dog world…especially when it comes to parking." The van pulled out and Kenshin smoothly slid in. "Awesome. Now let's find Ayame a gift, shall we?"

He got out of the car and walked to the other side to help her out.

"Chivalry died, didn't you get the memo?" she noted, taking his hand anyway.

He shrugged. "When it comes to you, never."

She almost wanted to cry again. He didn't deserve her. She wished she could dive into his eyes and stay there, swimming in the clear pools where everything was safe and beauty never faded.

He leaned in a little bit, and she managed to whisper, "Not here."

He continued to lean in until their foreheads rested against each other. She took a deep breath to savor the moment, because she felt that this was most likely going to be the last peaceful moment she would have with him.

* * *

Kaoru didn't end up finding anything, but as they were walking back to the car, she figured out the perfect gift to give her. After he dropped her back at her house, he started dialing his brother's cell phone. It kept ringing until he had pulled into his driveway.

"_Yo!_" Sozo yelled on the other side of the phone. There were a lot of extraneous voices on the other end as well as blasting music. He was probably out partying already or something to that extent.

"Sozo," Kenshin said in a near whisper.

"_What? Kenshin? Is that you?"_ Sozo continued to yell.

Kenshin swallowed. "I love her," he said with such suppressed longing that he nearly hung up the phone to hide in the corner of his room.

Sozo didn't say anything, but a lot of noise was still coming from the other line. Kenshin heard someone say, _"What's wrong Sozo, who're you on the phone with, huh?"_ and here was a struggle, apparently for the phone. Kenshin was really about o hang up when he heard Sozo scream, "_Get the FUCK off me, damn it!"_

Then there was a piercing silence. Maybe he had left the room he was previously in.

Kenshin waited for his brother to say something, _anything_ that could help him.

"_Are you going to tell her tonight?"_

Kenshin remained silent. He wasn't sure.

"_What do you expect me to say?"_ Sozo asked in a curious manner.

"The first thing that comes to mind? I'm…at a loss here."

"…_I don't want to share my thoughts on this, Ken. I don't know what's appropriate and what's not."_

Kenshin found that response somewhat strange. "What are you saying?"

"_I'm not saying anything. It's just…I'm not the right person to ask."_

After a moment of silence, Kenshin asked, "Then what are you _not_ saying? Are you hinting that you've never been in this situation before…or that you _have_?"

There was a piercing silence before Sozo said in a controlled voice, _"I have to go."_

"You have, haven't you? What happened?" Kenshin whispered.

Silence. After a few moments, he checked his phone to find out that Sozo had hung up on him. Kenshin sighed and closed his phone.

"Obviously it didn't end well," he muttered to himself as he got out of his car to change.

As he headed up toward his room, he thought about who the girl could've been. Obviously it happened in college. Was it that girl from the night before? No, it couldn't have been, he thought as he entered his room. Those two clearly only hooked up.

He put his iPod into his speakers and played some Simon and Garfunkel. Trying a different track of thought, he pondered about the times Sozo came home from breaks. Maybe there was a hint as to his attitude during one of those times?

Then he remembered winter break this year. He was always in and out of the house, except he wasn't out meeting friends. He went for long drives. He would stay locked up in his room, never any sounds coming out. That was probably when "it" happened. Kenshin wondered what the girl did to him…

He found his nicest pair of jeans and the white button shirt that he never wore except for occasions such as this. He was beginning to try and figure out where his good tie was when his phone rang. It was his brother.

He flipped open his phone and waited.

"_Sorry. You were prying."_

Kenshin sighed. "Well, Jesus, I mean, how was I supposed to react to that?"

"_With a bit more courtesy for my private life? I mean, honestly, for years I never talked about…shit like that."_

"Are you going to talk about it?"

"_No. That's a forbidden subject."_

"Then why the hell did you call me back?"

"_To make sure that you think I'm not a _complete_ jackass."_

"I already figured that you didn't want to share with the class what happened. I'm not thick, you know."

"_Alright, the truth is I've figured out the best option for you."_

"Really? Because that would be just awesome."

"_Don't tell her."_

"…What?"

"_Trust me. Don't tell her until you're in a solid relationship with her. This is a bad place for her. She's in between guys right now. I think if you told her your undying love for her, it'll drive her crazy and make her do something stupid, like go back to Enishi because she doesn't want to deal with those kind of feelings. It's too messy."_

"I don't know what to do! Because I want her to know that this isn't a joke for me! It's not like she's a…I don't know! You know what I mean? This is _real_. Listen to me; I'm a freaking a mess right now! I'm usually so eloquent, and I always know what to say, and this has got me all tongue-tied and fucked."

"_It's a bitch."_

"You're telling me! Now I have to go to this bat mitzvah and I'm not going to be able to focus and I just want to…ugh!" He started gripping the hair on his skull. "This is the last hurrah for us and tomorrow…I don't know what's going to happen."

"_Listen, you may feel like a poor schmuck right now…but tonight you'll feel like your normal self. And after a few beers, you'll loosen up. Look, this…emotion…isn't like a curse. Sure, it's nagging in the back of your mind, but…it kind of makes you more aware of the good things. Like the beautiful things in life. The sun, the trees _finally_ turning green again, the way your heart pounds in your chest whenever she's near. It's not all bad."_

Kenshin was standing in the middle of his room with his jaw slacked. "You continue to blow me away with your multiple personalities. I swear to God, Sozo, you're like a fucking onion."

Sozo snorted. _"The mystery that is me is very sexy – girls love it."_

"I bet they do," Kenshin muttered.

"_Well, I should go…I have more important shit to do than talk to you."_

"Thanks, that really makes me feel awesome. Have fun with Sumi."

"_What the –"_

"Because hanging out with someone you care about like that makes everyone seem insignificant."

"…_We're _so_ alike sometimes, it scares the crap out of me. Alright, peace!"_

Kenshin laughed as he closed his phone and tossed it onto his bed, still rather messy from his and Kaoru's earlier…activity. That would probably be the last time.

He took off his shirt and found a white one to put on under his button one. To delay putting on the nicer shirt, he went to his window where his book of lyrics was. He pulled out a blank piece, took a seat, uncapped a pen, and began writing.

_Ayame – _

_Congratulations on receiving your bat mitzvah – I'm sure it's such a relief knowing that you'll never have to go to Hebrew school again._

_But seriously, this is a big step. One step closer to becoming an adult. I know in your faith this day means that you become a woman, but the truth is, you're not one. At least not yet – you have a lot of things to learn before that day really comes. _

_You're entering a time in your life when you begin to question authority, question your friends, and question guys, who're starting to lose their hearts. Don't worry about that – guys are complete assholes until college. I personally wouldn't go out with one until then. And that is not coming from an older brother figure at all._ (He added a winking smiley face.)

_I wish you all the best, and remember, if you have any problems, you can always call me – I'm one of the rare guys who hadn't lost his heart. There are a few out there…you just have to search for them. And the funny thing is, they're probably guys you wouldn't expect._

_Remember – have fun tonight, and every day that you live. And don't fake it – nothing is worse than pretending your way through life. You'll regret it._

_Love, Kenshin_

He folded the letter and stuck it inside the CD case. Changing into his nice jeans a shirt, he searched for his navy and silver tie, which he just couldn't find. His first instinct was to call Kaoru, which he went along with.

"Kaoru? Try and think like me – where would I put my good tie?" he asked before she could even answer.

"_Uhm…would it be in your underwear drawer?"_

"Nope, checked there."

"_When was the last time you went out for a nice occasion?"_

"Uh…probably…a long time ago. I don't know, I think it was a wedding. My aunt's. Over a year ago."

"_Check that drawer again – go to the very bottom until you can touch the wood."_

He sighed and went back to the drawer, where he dug his hand past all his boxers and socks until he found something thin and smooth. "Oh, thanks."

"_Yeah, it's incredible, my skills. You owe me twenty bucks."_

He snorted. "I beg your pardon?"

"_I charge people for that kind of business. My friends totally take advantage of me, and now I put a price tag on my help. It's a dog-eat-dog world, right?"_

"Touché. But as usual, you're completely full of shit."

He heard her laughter on the other end, and it made his stomach clench. _"Yeah…but you know you love it."_

_Yeah. And I'd give anything not to_, he thought to himself sadly.

"So I'll come pick you up in ten minutes?"

"_Uh, no, give me twenty."_

"Are you joking?"

"_Aren't I always completely full of shit?"_

"Touché _again_. But okay, I'll see you soon." He hung up and pulled the tie out from his drawer.

"Tell Ayame and her family I said congratulations," Kenshin heard Hiko from the doorway say.

Kenshin nodded as he put on his tie. "No problem. What are you doing tonight?"

He heard Hiko walk inside. "Work. Maybe watch a movie."

"What movie?"

Hiko shrugged. "Kurosawa, probably."

"_Seven Samurai_? I liked that one."

"I was thinking of something that I hadn't seen already."

"Oh…well…have fun with that."

The conversation turned awkward, and Kenshin strolled over to his closet to find his good blazer.

"Don't come home too late – and don't drink too much either. I know those open bars are tempting."

Kenshin laughed as he put on his navy blazer. "Don't worry. I wouldn't do anything you wouldn't."

"Okay…have fun."

With that he left the room, leaving Kenshin to himself once more. Sticking his phone into his back pocket, he reached over to grab his acoustic guitar. Humming, he put it in its case, collected his gift for Ayame, nicked his keys, and headed out to his car.

* * *

The service was only a little more than an hour, which was good. He remembered going to some services that were almost three hours long. But the best part about it was sitting next to Kaoru, who looked stunning in her short black dress. He had to prevent himself from turning toward her and kissing every inch of bare skin.

But it was also amazing to see Ayame in a pale green dress, suddenly looking so much older than the little girl he babysat just a few years ago. It made him feel older too, which was scary. And thank goodness her voice was better than her guitar skills – she had a cute little voice when she sang in Hebrew.

All the guests then moved to a large hall where the party was. The tables were labeled after flowers and Kenshin and Kaoru's table was called "Sunflower." They both looked at each other and smiled as they took a seat. The table was also full with cousins of Ayame's, ranging from eight to twenty.

When Kenshin went to get drinks, Kaoru thought about the gift she gave Ayame: the silver ring her own mother bought her for her thirteenth birthday. Even though it had a small sapphire on it, she was sure Ayame would still like it.

He came back with a Coke for her, and a bottle of beer for him. "Wait, how –?"

"The bartender assumed I was getting the Coke for me, and the beer for someone else," he said, shrugging as he took a generous sip.

After dancing a bit, everyone went back to his or her seats where dinner was served, and while everyone was eating, Ayame was doing her candles.

Halfway though, Kaoru whispered "Do you think we'll get one?" while half their table stood up to join Ayame for a picture.

Kenshin shrugged. "I don't know. I think we will. I've never gotten one before."

That made Kaoru very sad for some reason. "That's just because none of your friends are Jewish."

"True. But I've always wanted one anyway. It seems kind of cool."

The room became silent once more and Ayame, stronger now after having done a couple, said clearly into the mike, "From watching _Mulan_ three times in one night, to playing Twister in the kitchen, to choreographing bad dances to 'NSYNC, you two made me wish for my parents to never come home." A few people laughed and Kaoru nudged Kenshin, who was grinning. "Kenshin, your patience in attempting to teach me the guitar was so appreciated, even though I couldn't manage to play two chords." At that point Kenshin chuckled and held up a glass of beer to her (Kaoru was wondering how he kept sneaking these drinks).

Ayame smiled and looked down at her notes. "Kaoru, letting me wear your jewelry and makeup, and doing it when I was eight was so nice of you – you're the older sister I never had." Ayame took a breath. "The two of you are so funny – I have so many fond memories involving you two, and I hope you never stray from each other, because you truly give meaning to the phrase, 'two heads are better than one.'"

Kaoru felt the back of her eyes sting a bit and she focused on not letting tears fall. She smiled at Ayame.

"So even though I'm too old to have a babysitter, I hope that maybe one day we can hang out at night like the old days, but until then, Kenshin and Kaoru, will you please come up and help me light candle number eight?"

Everyone clapped as Kenshin and Kaoru stood up. She focused on walking carefully, hoping beyond hope not to trip in her heals on the way up. Kenshin then suddenly looped his arm through hers, as if sensing her discomfort. When they reached Ayame, Kenshin took the few extra steps to Ayame's other side, put an arm around her waist and kissed her cheek affectionately. Kaoru followed suit and smiled at the camera while holding the thin, white candle. She made sure her hand was under Kenshin's.

They went back to their seats, arms looped once again. He picked up his drink and finished it. She began to wonder whether he planned on getting drunk tonight.

"Hey, how much are you going to drink?" Kaoru whispered as Ayame began her eleventh candle.

Kenshin looked at her with sober eyes. "Relax, Kao, it gets me more than three beers to get drunk. I'm slowing up now, I promise."

He kept his promise – he was sober for the party, but she could tell he had a bit of a buzz because he would laugh a little harder about things. However, he was completely normal when he performed an acoustic version of "Brown Eyed Girl" for Ayame as part of her gift.

But after that, by the way she was acting along with him, it was almost as if they were both tipsy. They were acting like the best friends they used to be.

"I see you two are having fun!" Ayame yelled over the loud music.

"Oh, a _blast_ – this is so fun," Kenshin said, slinging an arm around Kaoru's shoulders. "By the way, thanks _so_ much for the candle – it really means a lot to me."

"Yeah, thanks, Ayame," Kaoru said.

"You're welcome – you guys totally deserve it. By the way, all my friends are in love with you. So eccentric," Ayame said, touching the tie was now around his head. Somehow Kenshin looked adorable with it like that.

Kenshin laughed. "Well, tell them that they should make do with the boys in their own grade – they'll get better…eventually."

The DJ then started throwing cheap sunglasses at everyone. Kenshin took two pairs: a pair of pink heart-shaped sunglasses and a pair of green star-shaped ones. He took the star ones and gave the heart pair of Kaoru.

"Are you having fun?" Kenshin asked Ayame.

"Yeah! This is great. Well – I gotta go. I have to _mingle_ at what not."

"Bye!" Kenshin and Kaoru yelled before they continued dancing.

* * *

All of Ayame's friends were beginning to leave, the dance floor emptying and the lights getting a bit brighter in the room. Kenshin and Kaoru, however, were still laughing about something that involved a boy losing his pants because he was wearing them so slow and tripping over himself.

On the dance floor were discarded feather boas. Kenshin took a red one and Kaoru took a white one, each putting them on.

"Oh! Wait!" Kenshin said, putting his hands on her shoulders, signaling her to stay where she was before he slid over to the DJ (he had discarded his shoes halfway through the party) and asked him to play something. The DJ nodded and typed on his laptop a bit before the first few notes of "Don't Stop Believin'" filled the stereos. He ran over to her and dragged her to the dance floor.

"_Just a small town girl, living in a LONELY WORLD/ She took a midnight train going anywhere,_" they both sang, arms around each other's shoulders.

Kenshin picked up a pair of sunglasses on the floor and used it as a fake mike for them to sing in.

Kaoru noticed her parents laughing at the two singing. But she was beyond caring – she was having more fun than ever. By the time her parents left, they were nearing the end of the song.

Kenshin was removing his boa and sunglasses while singing, "_Some will win, some will lose/some where born to sing the blues,_" and Kaoru removed hers while singing "_Oh the movie never ends/It goes on and on and on and on…_"

During the small guitar solo, he turned so his full body was facing toward her, and she instinctively turned, surprised to see how close he was. He was kissing her fully by the time Journey started singing, "_Don't stop believin'/Hold on to that feelin'/Streetlight people…_"

She brought her arms around his neck to be as close to him as possible, because she somehow knew in the back of her mind that this was it, and it made her never want to let go.

* * *

A/N: Wow…I'm a senior? What? I can't believe I'm back at school, it just sucks.

Please review! It makes me feel better about the fact that I'm back in school for seven hours everyday.

MissGoalie


	14. Vacation: 9

A/N: Hey, this was a pretty quick update if I do say so myself :)

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Vacation: 9

When Kaoru woke up at eight in the morning, the first thing she did was turn on her cell phone with shaky hands. There were over 20 missed calls and seven voicemails. The first one was from Enishi.

"_Kaoru…I'm…I can't even apologize because words can't even _portray_ my regret. I just got _wasted_…I'd never drank that much in my life. I barely remember what happened…and I just really want to talk to you about it. Please call me back…I love you."_

She erased it. Next message was from Tomoe not long after.

"_Kao – it's Tomoe. You have to stop wallowing and talk with Enishi about it – you can get over this. You two are planning forever – call him back!"_

There were two more messages from Enishi, begging her to call him back. That was he waiting. That he loved her. There was also one from Megumi, her wondering where the hell she was. The next message was from Tomoe again.

"_Okay, so you're ignoring everyone. Fine. But what's not okay is your going to your ex-boyfriend. Don't ask how I know this – I know you better than you think. I knew back from freshmen year that you two were close. But…imagine how this is going to look: a girl who has been in a steady relationship for a year, suddenly dumping him, to go to her sketchy ex? That shows inconsistency…not a good quality for a president. Just…don't give up on Enishi. Think about this fully before you do anything stupid. Are you going to let _his_ mistake ruin your future? No, of course not. If you're going to dump him, then at least wait until you snag the presidency. Don't do this now."_

Kaoru closed her phone and let it slip through her fingers. Of course, she knew her future of presidency partially relied on her relationship with Enishi…and it meant so much to her. She could only imagine the disappointed faces of her friends and family if they knew what she was thinking…what she was planning on doing.

She closed her eyes and let a single tear roll down her cheek before she opened her phone to dial Enishi's cell phone.

He picked it up after the second ring.

"_Kaoru,"_ he breathed.

She wiped her face of tears. "Enishi."

There was an awkward silence until Enishi asked, _"Do you want to meet somewhere to talk? I could drive over to your house or you could –"_

"Let's meet at that café you showed me a couple of months ago."

"_Alright – bye."_

She hung up and tried to breathe properly. She had to get through this – she must. After all, she was Kaoru Kamiya, right?

* * *

Enishi was already sitting at a table in the corner waiting for her. The drink she normally ordered was there for her when she sat down. He looked terrible – he had rings under his eyes and he looked pale.

"Kaoru…" he trailed off, his eyes sporadically switching from the coffee cradled in his hands to a place beyond Kaoru's left shoulder. "I called you. I left you messages," he murmured.

"You didn't come to me in person."

Enishi took a shaky breath. "I know – I thought you needed space."

Kaoru bit her bottom lip, briefly wondering what she was doing – what was the point of settling things with him?

Right. Student government presidency.

"I'm…so…sorry, Kaoru. It was the biggest mistake I could _ever_ make. I just had a _lot_ to drink. And…I was kind of annoyed with you."

"What? Why?" she blurted.

"Well…I just saw the two of you talking a lot and it just pushed me over the edge," he sighed. "You can't blame me for feeling that way, Kaoru. I feel like I'm constantly competing with that guy."

_Kenshin._

"Well, you shouldn't be. You were my boyfriend. I dumped him for a reason."

_I broke his heart._

"Were?" he clarified softly.

She bit back a groan. "I don't know about that. I just don't know." There was an awkward pause before she asked, "What did you do this week?"

"Besides feel like shit? A lot of lacrosse practices - we have that big game this coming Saturday…they have the same record as we do," he answered. They lulled back into a silence. He cleared his throat. "So what did you do this week that made you turn your phone off and cut everybody off?"

_I gave him hope of having another chance._

Her nose twitched in annoyance. "I chose to turn my phone off. I was rightfully pissed. I _am_ rightfully pissed off at you," she said calmly.

"You should be pissed at me. I'm not saying you shouldn't be. All I'm saying was that I was a complete idiot and a total douchebag. I should've _never _done that." He swallowed and looked down at his untouched drink. "I wanted our first time's to be special…"

She nearly had forgotten that he was a virgin until that Friday night.

"I did too. There's one thing I know for sure at this point – I've lost all desire for us having sex," she stated plainly.

He nodded. "Understandable." He then froze. "You still didn't answer my question."

She smiled pleasantly, feeling herself immerse in the old façade that she had temporarily put away for spring break. "Oh, it's nothing really. Even though it's not _quite_ as unforgivable as what you did to me…it's enough."

They were silent for a moment. "What did you do?" he asked lowly.

_I'm sorry, Kenshin._

The smile fell off her face and she stared at him hard. "Who do you _think_ I spent my break with, Yukishiro?" she whispered, raising an eyebrow.

He narrowed his eyes. "Fair enough," he said coolly. "So where do we go from here?"

_I have no choice_.

This was where she was supposed to say that she would take him back – forgive and forget. She would take him back with open arms with complete understanding, saying that everybody makes mistakes. At least this was what Tomoe wanted her to say.

But she couldn't help but remember what Kenshin had said during the break:

"_There are some things that are just common sense. When you have the most amazing girl on your arm, you don't do things to hurt her. If you truly care about her, you don't do that. It's not just a mistake. What Enishi did wasn't a mistake that you could forgive him for her. He hurt you, he made you cry. What kind of boyfriend is supposed to do that?"_

But her future was calling her – first with student president, then sorority president, then…who knows? A bright future that had to begin right now.

"We can't pick up where we left off," she said quietly, almost feeling like she was giving up for some strange reason.

He nodded. "I'll work from the ground up."

She smiled a little. He was a good person with a good heart. "I…should go. I have to catch up with…people. And do homework. I'll see you tomorrow," she said, standing up and putting a hand on top of his. He smiled with relief and gripped her hand in goodbye.

When she got back to her car she tried not to picture Kenshin's face when she would tell him what happened.

_If it will make you feel any better, I won't be able to sleep either._

* * *

Kenshin woke up in a good mood. Even though he knew that they were probably not going to get back together, pick up where they left off a year ago, they were still going to be friends again like they used to be. After all those moments together, it just had to be true.

He went downstairs to make himself chocolate pancakes. Making enough for two, he was about to call Kaoru to ask if she wanted to eat breakfast at his house again when the doorbell rang.

He looked down at his attire: t-shirt and boxers and grimaced. "One sec!" he called out before running upstairs to throw on a pair of jeans. For the first time, he didn't need to wear a belt with his jeans to keep them up, which was exciting. He slid down the banister and ran over to the door.

He opened the door to find Kaoru standing there. "Hey! I was just going to call you – I made chocolate chip pancakes."

But when he saw the expression on her face, the smile slid off his. His muscles locked into place and dread washed over him. He felt his mind teeter between one memory of the past to the present.

* * *

_She was trying so hard not to cry, and that worried him. He wanted to hug her, console her, but her arms were crossed over her body, clearly wanting space._

"_Kenshin…" she started, trying to speak in a calm voice. "I…can't continue this," she finished in a whisper, tears threatening to fall._

* * *

"Kenshin…" she started, but this time, there were no tears in her eyes. "I just met with Enishi. We talked this over…"

Kenshin swallowed and tried to breathe. "And…" he cleared his throat. "How did it go?"

"Fine. This week he's been giving me the space I needed. He's very sorry."

"Of course he's very sorry," he muttered. He looked into her eyes and asked directly, "So what does this mean?"

She took a deep breath. "I'm…we're…still together."

Kenshin lost his grip on the door and let his hand fall to his side. He wanted to say something, _anything_, even a wordless exclamation, but his mouth wouldn't open.

"I mean, we're obviously not picking up where we left off, but…you understand, right?"

* * *

"_You understand, right? We're just so different, and sometimes I feel like we're on different frequencies. Like you're on FM and I'm on AM…"_

* * *

"And…" He felt the back of his eyes prickle when he said, "You're going to break the promise you made to me last week."

She looked up the sky, clearly trying to keep her tears at bay. "I _never_ wanted to hurt you. But…it's best this way. I can't be in a relationship with Enishi and be _close_ friends with you. I can't balance it, and it's just strain on my relationship."

* * *

"…_I think we should just…distance ourselves a bit. We're both involved in such different crowds. Don't you think it's best? I really think this is the only way to go. Our friends just don't intermingle and I think this is right."_

* * *

In two different times, Kenshin stared at her blankly as she continued to blabber on, random phrases falling from her trembling lips. This was the second time he truly felt that they were on two different frequencies. He let her words slowly translate in his mind, trying to digest them. When he finally understood what she was trying to do, his throat seemed to have tightened.

* * *

"_Where am I in this?" he asked quietly._

"_Huh?" she asked desperately, as if she had ran this scene in her mind millions of times and what he was saying wasn't following the script she had created._

"_If you…you really feel that way then we should talk about it. Don't do this, Kaoru. I know you don't want to," he continued, staring intently into her eyes._

* * *

"What about me? Did you think about how I would feel about this?" he inquired.

She rubbed her eyes. "Kenshin…this relationship we have is just _wrong_. We're neither friends…nor are we in a relationship. What we have is just…too many roles for just two people to play."

"So which do you want me to be?" he demanded quietly.

* * *

"_Maybe we just won't…speak to each other for a whole…that would be best," she said before turning away, hiding her leaking eyes._

"_For someone who is doing the dumping you're truly taking this hard."_

_She turned to face him, her black mascara leaving trails down her alabaster cheeks. "Just stop! How would you know how a dumper is supposed to act? I've been you're only girlfriend!" she hissed, her eyes ablaze with anger._

"_I've seen enough people getting dumped in the music world," he responded before swallowing loudly._

* * *

"I want…the relationship we had before last Friday," she answered him.

"Why? _Why_ do you want that? _Why_ are you going back to him? Tell me that, Kaoru, and I'm not letting you walk until you tell me. You're telling me vague things that aren't going to cut it this time around."

She didn't answer for a full minute. When she finally did, her tone is quiet and pained. "I love him."

He shook his head. "No, you_ don't_. You can't love him. If you did, you would've talked this out with him days earlier. If you loved him, you wouldn't have come to _me_ to be consoled. You don't want this."

"Well, I know what you want and I can't give it to you!" Kaoru hissed. "You can't just turn back time!"

"Why can't we? Why can't we just pick up where we left off? This guy who is so _lucky_ to have you completely threw you away for an easy fuck! It's not fair when I've been waiting," he said with a desperate voice, letting his façade as a laidback guitar player slip to reveal the true feelings he had been harboring for over a year.

"Oh, you've been _waiting_? Then what the hell was _Yumi_ all about?"

"Don't you _dare_ bring that up. You were hooking up with Enishi, why couldn't I do that with Yumi? You know I fucking _hate_ hypocrites and double standards," he answered angrily.

"You just said you were waiting – that doesn't count as waiting for me. You acted just fine afterwards, save for being a complete jackass to Enishi. What about that? You're just a liar, you know that?"

He shook his head. "You say I'm a liar? Well, you know what, you're right. I am. I'm a great liar. I never let anyone in. I never let them see who I really am."

"It really sounds like you're blaming _me_ for that, and you can't just –"

"Maybe I am. I'm starting to think that somewhere in my subconscious I decided it would be easier to hide, to pretend to be something I'm really not." He eyed her pointedly. "Sound _familiar_?"

"Don't _compare_ yourself to me! Besides, you never had to pretend to be anything other than what you are," she argued. "You were always a _lazy_, insensitive prick that cared nothing about our relationship once your band started getting attention."

His hands balled into shaking fists. "You can call me lazy, and you can call me a prick…but _not_ insensitive. I've pretended to be happy. I've pretended that it doesn't _kill_ me every time I see you and Enishi together. I pretended that I wasn't miserable all the time because you left me. I pretend all the-_fucking_-time. And I know damn well that you know that too. It was for _you_."

* * *

"_Well, you know what, just go back to that world because I clearly don't belong in it," she said resolutely as she turned on her heel, completely walking out of his life for the first time._

* * *

"I _care_ about Enishi. He makes me happy, or he did before Friday. I love my friends, the ones that you can't stand. They look out for me, and they support me like the way you used to."

"Kaoru…I'm a friend to you…first and _foremost_."

She smiled a little. "I know that, so you have to do something for me…as a _friend_."

He sighed and it shook his shoulders with its depth. "I'm not sure I can pretend you leaving me again is not a big deal. I'm not sure I can hide this time."

"I want you to not mention this week to anyone. I want you to keep your distance…at least for a little while so I can get my relationship with Enishi back on its feet," she continued as if she hadn't heard his last comment. But he knew she did.

He nodded, signaling the end of their conversation, but she continued to stand there. "Well, go ahead, turn your back on me. Twice is nice, right?" he said, holding his arms out to his sides before letting them fall back to his sides.

As she walked away, he knew it wasn't right to get her away from Enishi by manipulating things like that, and he painfully realized it the day before. But he also knew that he didn't deserve this. He couldn't make his feet move, his legs nailed to the ground as she got into her car and drove away. And when he was sure that she couldn't see the house anymore, he collapsed onto his knees, hoping beyond hope that he was going to wake up two seconds later to find it all a nightmare.

But seconds became minutes and he knew that he wasn't going to wake up. This nightmare was still going on and she wasn't coming back to held him to his feet.

"Get a grip, Himura, you knew it was going to end like this," he muttered to himself, getting to his feet.

He shut the door before going straight for the cabinet above the wine fridge. Inside was a bottle of scotch that Hiko got as a holiday gift for business. Kenshin had never tried scotch, having always preferred beer, but he figured that he wanted to get drunk badly, and scotch would probably be the fastest way. He twisted the cap open and downed it, but when he was able to taste it, he gagged and spat it out.

"Ugh!" he exclaimed, coughing and spitting in the sink. "Fuck that," he muttered, capping it shut and putting it back in the cabinet. "Tastes like fucking gasoline."

From the corner of his eye he saw Hiko standing by the kitchen entrance. Kenshin grimaced – this wasn't very good.

They stared at each other for a few moments before Hiko said, "Hated it?" Kenshin nodded. "Good."

"What would you've done if I did? You never stopped me from doing anything else like a normal parent," Kenshin snapped.

"Everything you've done _is_ normal. Drinking at your age is normal – I did it, so why would I prevent you? Trying pot is normal too…though I'm glad you didn't like that. It was bad enough having one son do that through high school."

"How do you know that I tried it? And that I hated it?"

"Well, the night you did you smelt like shit…not to mention you stumbled around a lot through the house. After that I never smelt it."

Kenshin almost laughed. "I thought you were asleep that night."

Hiko snorted. "I'm always up until the light goes out in your room…or at least until you come home."

Kenshin's breath hitched in his throat. "Oh."

They stood in silence for a few moments before Hiko said, "It'll be okay."

Kenshin shook his head. "No, it won't. it's done, it's really done. Even after this whole week she _still_ can't go back to the way it was…then…" he trailed off, trying to hold back his emotions, which embarrassed him.

"It won't be the same as last time, you'll still be friends."

"_No_! You don't _get_ it. We _can't_ just be friends anymore."

"Why not? Why can't you let go of your relationship with her and just be friends? You were friends far longer than you were otherwise."

Kenshin shook his head again, this time having a resigned expression on his face. "Two days ago I would've done that…I could've done that. Now, I can't. That was just my being desperate."

Hiko narrowed his eyes. "What changed?"

"Forget it. I'm going out."

Kenshin walked past his father and up the stairs to change his shirt. He considered pulling a Sozo and going on a very long drive, but he figured that he wouldn't be able to sit still for a few hours, so when he came downstairs, he walked out the front door and just continued walking down his street.

He opened his phone to call Sano.

"_Hey, Kenshin, what's up? How was her bat mitzvah?"_

Kenshin swallowed. "It was a lot of fun. I got a candle with Kaoru."

"_Awesome! Well _I_ got stuck babysitting my siblings, which sucked. But, strange news! Apparently Yahiko has found a girl."_

"Really? Who?" Kenshin asked. He liked this distraction.

"_I don't know. Her name starts with a 'T' or something."_

"Where did he meet her?"

"_His dad's business party – one of the guys' daughters."_

"Did they hook up or anything?"

"_I thin they did – but Yahiko's not spilling, surprisingly enough."_

"Huh…"

"_Okay, I think I've stalled long enough – what the hell happened?_"

Kenshin swallowed. He wasn't sure he could actually say the words that Sano and the other boys had warned him about.

"_She didn't…"_ Sano started.

"Yeah."

"_Shit."_

"I don't know, anymore, Sano. I really don't. I…I really gave her everything I had, you know?"

"_Is she back with him for good?_"

"No…she _said_ that they were going to start all over. Get back on their feet. She wants me to back away until they get _comfortable_."

"_Kenshin, I know you really like Kaoru and all that, and I know that you would fight to the death for her, but she's really a bitch. I'm sorry, what kind of person _does_ that? It's bullshit. She practically _reeled_ you along for a week. You gave her…everything…"_

Kenshin sighed, stopping at an intersection. "Yeah…now…I'm going to give her one last thing that I can give."

"_You don't owe her _anything_."_ Sano growled on the other line.

Kenshin took a shay breath. "I'm going to let her go. I…_did_ let her go. I'm going to let her do what she wants…what she thinks will make her happy. Her…and him."

There was a tense silence, and Kenshin couldn't find it in himself to continue forward.

"_Then what are you left with?"_ Sano whispered.

Kenshin found himself sadly chuckling. He couldn't feel the tears on his face as he closed his phone, turned around, and went back home.

He was giving up. There wasn't any point. She kept rejecting him, and he kept setting himself up for it. This cycle had to stop – it killed him every time it ended. But this time, he couldn't put up a façade, pretend he was happy and it didn't bother him. For the whole week he was convincing her that she didn't need one – that was beautiful inside and out. But the only one who seemed to have gotten that message was he.

The only thing he was going to hold back this week was his desires: to pull her away when they walked down the hallway together, to run away when she heard him laugh at something he said, to stride over to her and kiss her when she snuck a glance back at him, to cry when she rested her forehead against his before their kiss.

He was torn. Torn between feelings that he had to put some distance between him and Kaoru, and a relentless longing for her. It was enough to make him break.

* * *

A/N: I _know_ this is short compared to the other chapters, but we are getting to the end of the line here! The good news is that the next chapter will be out faster! Now, the main question is, should there be an epilogue? Or would you prefer me to surprise you with an epilogue-oneshot in Shards of Ornaments? Tell me what you think in your _review_! ;)

MissGoalie


	15. School: 1 to 5

A/N: I'm getting good with updating, yeah? I think so!

cruel-humor101 - I hope you like the addition to this chapter :) you totally helped me out – I completely forgot about this song.

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

School: 1-5

_Monday_

"Kenshin…" Sano started to say when he first saw Kenshin get out of his car.

He clearly didn't sleep, but he looked drained more than anything. Sano was frightened – those violet eyes were dead.

Sano had nothing else to say.

"It's not as bad as it looks. I'm fine," Kenshin said without much emotion.

Sano tried to smile. "Remember that crappy movie with Marky Mark? Fine stands for – "

"Freaked out, insecure, neurotic, emotional. I know."

"Hmmm…so I suppose that's a good word to describe you right now?"

A ghost of a smile grew on Kenshin's face. "I suppose."

Sano shook his head and put an arm around Kenshin's shoulders. "Come on, let's go to prison – we don't want to be late."

Kenshin almost felt normal for a moment.

* * *

"Kaoru!" Tomoe exclaimed, bringing Kaoru into a tight hug. "Ugh, you have _no_ idea how horrible my break turned out to be – just going to that _funeral_ and seeing all those –"

"I've missed you," Kaoru said honestly.

Tomoe squeezed her before pulling away. "So, what ended up happening?"

Kaoru took a breath. "We're taking it slow…but we're still together. I still have feelings for him."

Tomoe nodded. "That's the best way to go. Besides, you two just _click_. Of course, he was a total bastard for doing that, but he's essentially a great person."

Kaoru nodded. "Yeah. It doesn't bother me so much now."

"Oh, I sense something _dirty_…go on…" Tomoe said in an impressed tone.

"Well…after I caught him…I…went to Kenshin…and I hung out with him for the week, as you figured out."

"And…?"

"And…I hooked up with him. Twice."

Tomoe had an evil grin on her face. "Now, _that_, my dear friend, is what I call getting even. Does Enishi know?"

Kaoru held the door open for the both of them, entering the school. "I hinted at it – he knows."

"Let's just hope your sleazy ex doesn't blab about what happened," Tomoe said with a scoff.

"He wouldn't do that, trust me," Kaoru nearly whispered.

Tomoe sighed. "I suppose so. I have to give it to him, despite his horrible qualities…he's really protective of you."

"You think?" she whispered this time.

"Of course. He's been watching Enishi's every move ever since you dumped him. He _still_ does. It's creepy." Tomoe shuddered, and tried to think of something else. "But enough about him. Let's talk about your _campaign_…"

* * *

_Tuesday_

"So, the formula for changing bases is…" Mr. Saito stopped in the middle of his sentence.

After a few moments of catching up what Saito had written on the board, Kenshin looked up to find Saito staring straight at him. In fact, everyone else was staring at Kenshin as well. That was the first time anyone had seen Kenshin take notes on anything.

"Are you ill?" Saito asked, making some people chuckle.

Kenshin shook his head and swallowed.

Saito narrowed his eyes at Kenshin before shrugging, going back to the blackboard. After everyone got back to taking notes, Kenshin snuck a glance to where Enishi was sitting to find him staring at Kenshin with an unreadable expression. Kenshin merely looked back down at his notes and continued writing.

* * *

Kaoru couldn't look at Kenshin during Government. She couldn't imagine seeing those eyes stare back. She knew that Sano, Soujiro, and Yahiko hated her. Every time they passed in the hallway, they would glare at her. Or at least Sano and Yahiko would. Soujiro would stare at her, trying to read her mind as to how she could be so cruel.

She would rather be glared at.

She felt depressed. All she wanted to do was stay in her room and sleep everything away. People were noticing, too. Asking her if she was okay, why she looked sad, why she barely ate. Especially Megumi, who asked to meet for coffee on Wednesday. She wondered what Megumi wanted to talk about.

She forced herself to bring herself back. Whenever she let her mind drift, if Kenshin was in the same room, she found herself turning her head towards him.

* * *

Kenshin collapsed onto his chair in front of his computer, thankful that he got through another day. But the thought of repeating the same routine for another day made him groan. When his computer fully loaded, he went on his iTunes. He opened a drawer and took out his case of blank CDs.

He began burning.

* * *

_Wednesday_

Kaoru nearly cried when she found a CD case on top of her windshield wipers. Her name was written in that cursive she knew like her own handwriting. There were faded lyrics behind her name, but her focus was on the folded piece of paper inside the case. When she opened it, it read:

_Songs That Remind Me Of You_

That Thing You Do!_ – Ha ha remember that movie? Our moms were watching this in another room and we were wondering why the hell that song kept playing over and over._

Absolutely (Story of a Girl) – Nine Days_ – Whatever happened to that band? But, as you already know, your old obsession with this song led to the naming of my band._

Don't Stop Believin' – Journey_ – No words needed._

I've Just Seen A Face – The Beatles_ – One of the few instances where my life felt just like a movie._

My Favorite Accident – Motion City Soundtrack

Everchanging (Acoustic) – Rise Against_ – When I listen to this song now, I sometimes wonder if my life really is a movie. It fits too well._

I Want To Hold Your Hand – The Beatles _– I remember we were on the phone, another one of our ridiculously long conversations, and you said that you just read this book where one of the characters say that this song was the ultimate love song. I agree._

Hands Down – Dashboard Confessional

I Will Follow You Into The Dark – Death Cab For Cutie_ – Before you told me that "I Want to Hold Your Hand" was the ultimate love song I thought it was this one. I still think it's up there._

Memory – Sugarcult_ – This goes without saying, right?_

Dark Blue – Jack's Mannequin_ – It's so you. I can't listen to this song without thinking of you especially._

Chasing Cars – Snow Patrol_ – That was what people call a moment._

She flipped the case over to read some of the lyrics, which included, "_You hit the road and left me an ocean/I can't swim in the silence of your skin-skin please let me in,_" and, "_Now how did we wind up this way/Watching our mouths for the words that we say/As long as we stand here waiting/Wearing the clothes or the soles that we choose_."

She got inside the car and checked her face in the mirror to make sure her mascara didn't run.

* * *

Kenshin dreaded gym now more than ever. Being within a couple of feet of Enishi caused a mixture of emotions to toil inside him that he didn't know whether he wanted to beat the living crap out of him, or beg him to reveal how he was able to get a second chance from Kaoru.

"Do you think he's going to make us run at practice?" Kenshin heard one of Enishi's fellow lacrosse players ask as Kenshin opened his locker.

"Now? Probably not as much – he wants us fresh for the game on Saturday. He's gonna start taking it easy on us," Enishi answered with relief. "Thank God. I want to be able to walk without experiencing pain."

Kenshin heard the slam of two lockers.

"Yo, you're so lucky, Yukishiro. I can't believe she took you back," his friend started again.

"Yeah, I am. She's such a good person," Enishi said humbly.

Kenshin froze midway of taking off his t-shirt.

"So…how was it?" Enishi's friend murmured.

"How was what?"

"You know…Akako? She's supposed to be _great_."

"I was drunk, Bishamon. I barely remember."

"Oh, come on, Enishi. Humor me."

Kenshin heard Enishi sigh and say quietly, "Well, the rumors are true. She does know what she's doing."

Kenshin then slammed his locker shut, causing everyone to stop what he was doing to stare at him, who trying to keep his anger under control.

"You don't _deserve_ her, Yukishiro," Kenshin found himself saying loud and clear.

Kenshin turned away from his shut locker to find Enishi coming up to him.

"I don't think your opinion matters to me, and it certainly doesn't matter to Kaoru," Enishi said calmly, crossing his strong arms across his chest.

"It's not my opinion – it's the goddamn truth."

"You know what, just shut the _fuck_ up," Enishi said, as if he was holding back saying that for months, which was probably the case. "You're just pissed 'cause Kaoru dropped you as soon as she realized she wouldn't get anywhere in life while dating an overgrown five-year-old."

"At least that overgrown five-year-old wouldn't have ever _dreamed_ of cheating when he had a girl like her waiting for him! I never hurt Kaoru and that's what gets to you, Enishi, the fact that even though she thought me immature and ridiculous at times, the whole while we were going out I never even _once_ looked at another girl."

"_At times_? She said you guys' going out was one of the worst things that could've happened to her! Said she was lucky her friends could forgive and forget."

"Hah! Shows how much you know Kaoru, the real Kaoru. She might not admit it but when she was with me, we were _happy_. We had _fun_…are you familiar with that word? It's when you go out and do stuff besides have serious talks about serious matters and how serious you are about your serious future. Have you guys done any of that? Have you snuck food into movie theatres, stayed up all night just to watch the sunrise? Have you just stayed up late to watch her sleep on your fraying couch and promise to yourself that you'd never let her go?"

Enishi froze for the briefest of moments before giving him a small smirk that held pure triumph. "Looks like you broke that promise twice, Himura. That's exactly what you did – you let her go."

Kenshin strode out of the locker room without saying anything. He skipped gym that day.

* * *

Kaoru met Megumi at Starbucks after school. It was the one farther from the school, so there weren't any other kids their age there for the time being.

When Kaoru sat down in the comfy armchair across from Megumi, she was immediately drilled.

"Okay, Kaoru. I think I've kept my distance long enough. Be honest. Who is he to you? During school you act like you couldn't give a rat's ass about him, but then you go around and spend the entire spring break with him and ignore everyone else," Megumi demanded.

Kaoru looked away from Megumi, knowing she was talking about Kenshin. She let out a shaky breath. "You don't know what happened before sophomore year. My relationship with Kenshin…it runs _really _deep."

"I know you were family friends if that's what you're saying."

Kaoru shook her head. "No, not like that. We were just…he was _it_. He was my _best_ friend. When I first moved here it wasn't a girl who came up to talk to me, it was Kenshin." She shook her head again, a sad smile on her face. "We went through so much together, Megumi. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, leaving him."

"Then why did you?" Megumi asked coolly. It was the million-dollar question.

"Huh?" Kaoru asked, finally looking back up at her.

"Yeah, he's not perfect in the sense that he doesn't have three varsity letters nor does he have overly successful parents or whatever. But…now that I've had time to really think about it…I think that Kenshin really is perfect. For you, I mean," Megumi said slowly.

"No, he's not. He can't be – he goes against everything that I believe in," Kaoru vehemently denied. "Enishi…at least we're compatible…and…"

Megumi stared at her with a deadpan expression. "Kaoru, for this whole _damn_ week so far you've been miserable. And frankly, I hate the bastard and I'm surprised that you don't too. I bet during break you hated him."

Kaoru narrowed her eyes. "I've had time to think about it. It was a mistake – we all make mistakes."

"You don't make a _mistake_ like that, Kaoru! What kind of guy does that to his girlfriend, huh?" Megumi asked desperately, almost as if she was feeling her friend slipping through her fingers.

"A drunk one. He won't make a mistake like that again – I think losing his virginity was quite a punishment," Kaoru stated simply, immediately ending the conversation.

Megumi let out a breath. "Whatever, it's none of my business. I shouldn't give a fuck about your reasons for taking him back. If you think your reasons are good enough for you, then I should be satisfied too." She stopped for a moment. "But I _do_ care when I see a usually happy guy walking through school like a zombie all because a girl broke his heart. 'Cause that's what you did, Kaoru, you _broke his heart_."

Kaoru tried to push back the memory of him saying those words to her. "As you said, it's none of your business what I do with my love life," Kaoru said rather coldly.

"I just…I have a question about Kenshin. Just one more before we close this subject for good, since that's what you want."

Kaoru paused before nodding. "Fine. One."

Megumi sighed. "I know…he's kinda rough around the edges, has a strange sense of humor, and is way too smart for his own good, but what did he do that made you think he wouldn't always be there for you?" Megumi smiled a little and looked down at her hands. "I don't know if you ever noticed, but whenever he's near you…he gets this look in his eyes, like…honesty and clarity and confidence…I haven't seen…I've never seen any guy here look that way."

Kaoru breath hitched in her throat. She couldn't get words to get through. And Megumi noticed her struggle.

"Get back to me when you have the answer to that, would you?" Megumi asked softly before standing up and leaving Kaoru alone to her thoughts.

* * *

_Thursday_

"Kenshin, I think I have something that might cheer you up!" Soujiro said during lunch.

"What?" Kenshin asked dully. He didn't bother to buy lunch and pretend to eat at this point.

"While Yumi was at my house…she left this for you," Soujiro said, searching through his backpack and pulling out an envelope with Kenshin's name written on the front.

Kenshin's eyes widened and took it carefully. "And you just found it?"

"Yeah…it got stuffed between my bed and the wall," Soujiro reluctantly admitted, turning a humorous shade of red.

Kenshin smiled a little as he stuffed the letter in his back pocket for later. "Thank you," he said.

Soujiro smiled. "She probably wrote something helpful in there."

"Well, aren't you the sucky messenger," Yahiko said to Soujiro.

"Why do you say that?"

"You gave it to him _so_ late. She probably hoped, given how organized you are with your room and whatnot, that you would give to him a day or two after you guys hooked up."

Soujir flushed all over again. "As I said – it got stuffed –"

Yahiko sniggered. "Result of your _activity_."

"Oh you can go straight to hell!"

Sano laughed. "You shouldn't be talking, Yahiko. You're not telling us anything about that chick."

This time Yahiko kept his mouth shut.

Everyone was quiet for a few moments until Kenshin surprisingly started talking.

"You know…this whole week…I've been…wanting to stand up and say something, but something's always pulling me back."

"What're you talking about?" Sano asked slowly.

Kenshin shook his head. "I mean…I shouldn't hold all of this in…it's not right. And she has a right to know…and I know nothing can ever happen if I just leave everything the way it is…"

There was a tense silence that lasted a minute until Soujiro cleared his throat. "What're you trying to say?"

Kenshin bit his bottom lip. "I'm trying to say that…that I can't let her go. I just can't. I haven't gotten over her and I think I never will. At least until I know for sure…"

"Know what?"

"…If she loves me or not."

Another silence. "…Do you love her?" Sano asked in a low voice.

Kenshin closed his eyes. "Yes."

Sano inhaled sharply. "That bitch."

"Why do you say that?" Kenshin asked.

Sano shook his head, his eyes full of sympathy. "Because of her, you're in such a fucked up position."

"That's what she said," Yahiko blurted. Everyone stared at him. "I'm sorry! Sano totally set himself up!"

The rest chuckled a little before lapsing into a thoughtful silence.

"I can't seeing you like this, Kenshin," Soujiro admitted softly. "It's not fair."

Kenshin smiled sadly and turned his face to where Kaoru was sitting across the cafeteria. She didn't have any food in front of her either. And she looked tired, and he would go as far as to say upset.

"It's a strange comfort…to know that she's feeling pain too. That way I know that I really did mean something to her. It makes the pain tolerable."

She met his eyes for a brief second before she whipped her head back to her friends sitting across from her.

* * *

Kaoru sat on her bed and listened to the songs from the CD Kenshin made for her, her mind taking her back to all the different times they had shared: when they were nine and their mothers were watching that Tom Hank's movie, Kenshin showing her the first song he learned on the guitar, them hugging each other tightly before she went on the bus that summer, their first kiss on that warm August night on the beach…

She knew he was unraveling. She could see it – dark bags under his lifeless eyes. People were wondering why he wasn't acting normal. They wondered what happened over break.

People were staring at her, too. She hated walking down the hallways with Enishi now, because every time she did, she could feel eyes watching her. And not in a good way. Obviously word had gotten around about Enishi's cheating, but it didn't make it any better.

The CD had finished playing "Chasing Cars," and her room was silent. She was too lazy to go up and start it again. But after two minutes, some notes began playing. She recognized it from the recesses of her memory. If only the band would start singing…

"_Broken this fragile thing now/And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces_,"

Yellowcard. "Only One."

Of course. Track 13. A hidden track.

When the chorus came on, she cried.

* * *

Kenshin sat on his bed and opened up the letter from Yumi and began to read:

_Kenshin –_

_Knowing my rotten luck, Sou probably found this days-too late and you're probably back in school and whatnot._

_So I'm just going to assume that Kaoru, at the worst (not to mention the last) possible moment, left you standing in front of your front step again. She's gone back to Enishi, but she says that it won't be same, that they're going to rebuild their relationship again. And you and I both know that this is just a way to run from her issues. But the thing is, you're probably sitting in your room right now, feeling like a piece of shit, reading this letter, hoping for a sign of sorts. A pearl of wisdom._

_I wrote this letter because I knew that my mother was going to send me away, whether I acted like a perfect angel or not. Ever since she's been secretly seeing this guy, she hasn't wanted to deal with me. We've always had a bad relationship. _

_I also wrote this letter because I have things to say that I felt kind of awkward about sharing on the phone. Besides, I've always felt that letters are a bit more personal…it's kind of like your belief in never typing out your lyrics, because seeing your handwriting makes the lyrics seem more alive. You connect the handwriting to the voice._

_I'm rambling – let me just get this out: I've met your brother before. It was a couple days after Shishio dumped me for the final time and my band was performing by his college. I recognized him by your descriptions and he was looking really emo (it's so funny how alike you two are). So I came up to him and he surprisingly didn't tell me to fuck off or anything. And we started drinking and stuff and we came to sharing a lot personal things. I won't tell you exactly what your brother shared with me, since I promised that I would take it to my grave, but I told him about Shishio and what he did to me. Here, I'll write a little script-dialogue for you:_

_Me: So I feel like my whole world is crashing around me and it makes me want to rip what's left of my heart to shreds so no one, not even I, can touch it. (Of course I'm less eloquent and coherent)_

_Sozo: Was he worth it?_

_Me: What?_

_Sozo: Do you regret the time you've spent with him? The love you've given him? Do you wish you could take back that night?_

_Me: I guess not – I had some really great times with him – he opened new doors for me and that night was perfect, I can't deny that. Not to mention he was the first guy I ever felt strongly for. When I look back on it, I just feel sad that it ended over stupid things._

_Sozo: Then that should help you get through it. You may feel like shit now, because it's all so fresh and it hurts so much that you think you may be bleeding internally. But if there's one thing that I've finally figured out this winter, it's that you can't do anything about the past. What's done is done. What you can do in the present and the future, though, is look at the past with a fond eye, and not be a bitter son of a bitch, because that's not going to get you anywhere. It took me almost seven years to figure this out…but I least I understand it now._

_Me: Wow. That's…incredible. So what are you going to do now?_

_Sozo: Try to not be a bitter son of a bitch._

_Me: So does that mean you'll make up with your family?_

_Sozo: …Yeah. One day._

_And he did – he made up with you. So it gives me hope that one day I'll look back on my time with Shishio and there won't be an ounce of bitterness. But the whole point of all this is…don't be emo; don't sit around by yourself feeling miserable about yourself – it's not going to get you anywhere. You have to __do__ something about it: either finally start letting go of Kaoru, admit that the relationship is doomed and not meant for the real world, or take a stand in whatever way suits you – stop her in the hallway and kiss her in front of everyone, call her on the phone, bust into her house, stand in front of a crowd and scream your love for her, __anything__ that will make her realize that you have faith in the two of them, that what you two have is something that happens a million times in movies and books, but never happens in real life, something that's worth waiting for. I mean, how often do you find the right person?_

_In conclusion: I want you to be happy; if moving on will make you happy, then do it. If waiting for that one day when she comes back to you will make you happy, then do it. Either way, you have to make a decision, and that's what Sozo learned. You're at a crossroad, kiddo. You've been at it since she dumped you over a year ago, and you've been futzing around until now. _

_Make your choice…I guess is what I'm suggesting. Everybody has told you to move on, to do this, to do that, and there's a reason why you haven't done anything: none of what people have said have gotten to you. I hope that this will. I know you, you can't live your life like this for very much longer; you're going to have to make a decision regarding your future._

_You've been tuning for too long now – it's time to make your way to the stage and sing you fucking heart out! (How's that for cheesy? I think you're rubbing off on me.)_

_From your fellow believer in the power of fateful situations, Yumi_

* * *

_Friday_

At two o'clock in the morning, Kenshin he got out of bed and wrote his own letter to Yumi and stuffed it in an envelope. He was going to have to give it to Misao.

_Yumi – _

_After reading your letter, I've been lying in bed thinking. It's now two in the morning and I'm at a loss. I'm hoping that tomorrow (or I should say later) at school it'll come to me in a flash of brilliance. I've been creating lists in my head: pros and cons, reasons why I should move on, reasons why I should wait, and none of it's working for me. I don't think I'm meant to do exactly one thing or another. It just shows that I'm not cookie-cutter…that my situation isn't by the books. I have to do something that works for me._

_I have to admit, I was happy that you wrote that letter – that phone call didn't satisfy me at all._

_But I wanted to tell you something that I realized, something that I've been afraid to really think about: I love you. Okay, let me explain._

_After last weekend when I realized that I loved Kaoru, I started thinking about whom I loved in my life. There are __so__ many different kinds of love…it's really incredible. I love my mother, and that transcends life and death; I love my boys – they're my brothers from another mother or whatever that saying is; I love my blood brother, and even though he can be such a jackass, he's still a good person and he gives me comfort that our love for our mom will never let us stray off the good path; I love Kaoru, and the way I feel when I'm near her and the way she acts around me, her little habits, those secret smiles…_

_And I love you. I'm not sure what that love is – it's not like Kaoru's, and it's not like my band mates…it's something almost in between. I think you're my best friend. Once Kaoru became more than a friend to me, I realized that she was never meant to be my best friend, it was just another step that led us to being what we were meant be. You're the one who truly deserves that title._

_When First Absolute gets a record deal, we're recording a duet. I'll find you wherever you go._

_Thank you for everything._

_Love always, Kenshin_

* * *

After fifteen minutes of waiting in the choir room, people started to leave. When Kenshin left with Sano, Yahiko, and Soujiro, Kaoru was still in the choir room, telling Enishi to go to get help with studying for Physics, to leave her there – she had a lot of reading to catch up on.

Kenshin knew she was lying.

He heard them kiss, making him want to retch his guts out. Enishi quickly walked out of the room, holding sheets of paper filled with Physics problems, not even looking at the four boys. But then he heard Misao say, "Bye, Kaoru!" and she skipped out of the room. She winked at Kenshin, which surprised him, and then she followed after Enishi.

Interesting.

Kenshin looked at Soujiro and raised an eyebrow. "What do you think?"

Soujiro shrugged. "It doesn't matter what I say – you're going to eavesdrop anyway."

Kenshin smiled and everyone sped walked as quietly as they could so there was a safe distance away from Enishi and Misao, but they could still hear them.

Misao looked behind her and grinned at them before turning her attention toward Enishi. "Hi!" she said brightly.

He flickered his eyes toward her in confusion. They had never talked alone before. They were merely acquaintances with a mutual friend. "Hi, Misao, how are you?"

"I'm fine, and you?"

"Nervous. I have this Physics test on Monday I have _no_ idea what we've been learning. So I really want to go meet with my teacher."

"You know…I think she was relieved that you cheated on her. A small part, at least," Misao said to Enishi. She was very straight to the point.

Kenshin and the gang stopped in their tracks, as did Enishi. They quickly hid behind a pillar beside the entrance to the cafeteria.

"_What_?" Enishi asked incredulously.

She nodded. "Yeah, because it put a _really_ good distance between you two. I mean, the next step in your relationship was sex, right?" she said this unabashedly, making him flush.

He said nothing.

"Well…she was probably freaked out," she continued.

"How do you know?" he asked with a mixture of curiosity and anger.

"Because…the farthest she's ever gone with is with Kenshin…and they went far."

Sano looked at Kenshin, who tried hard not to meet his gaze.

"What do you mean…how _far_ did she go with him," he asked this in a way that he almost didn't _want_ to know.

But she answered him anyway. "Oh, they were close to doing it. She freaked out though…and I guess he freaked out a bit too. It was just…a lot. They were just really close in every way that…"

He stopped her from continuing. "Are you _kidding_? This is insane! It's not normal! How can those two ever get over each other?"

She smiled triumphantly. "That's the thing…they _can't_…and they _won't_. Especially if they leave it like this. You'll never have her completely, Enishi. Hate to break it to you. That one little piece of her heart is always going to belong to that numbskull of a redhead."

Kenshin smiled a little, starting to feel better than he had all week.

"Well…he doesn't seem to be ragging on her to take him back…"

She sighed. "That's because –"

"Look. I get it. You don't like me very much. You're good friends with Himura. But…it's hard to read that guy. If you really mean it, that he really cares for her like I do, then it really doesn't matter…because he's not doing anything about it. He's not fighting for her. She deserves more than a moping boy who waits for her to come around."

"Well she deserves more than a guy who cheats on her."

"That's really none of your business."

"Is it not? They're two of my closest friends. By cheating on Kaoru, you hurt her directly, and him indirectly."

"If there's _one_ thing I wish I could take back, it's that night, I _promise_ you. I can't even look at myself in the mirror I feel so guilty."

"Good."

Enishi sighed. "I feel sorry for him. I know that he really likes her still. I know he never got _completely_ over her. And maybe I shouldn't have said some things to him, or I shouldn't have flaunted Kaoru in his face sometimes, but I really like her too. And…I fought for her. Shouldn't I deserve her a little bit for that?"

Kenshin swallowed and looked down at his feet, gripping his guitar case. It was true. He didn't fight for her, not really. He never stepped out and told her point blank that he wasn't over her. But here was Enishi, having done a horrible deed, but then fighting for her, telling her that he still loved her and that he didn't want to break up with her. And what had Kenshin done? Wrote dozens of songs vaguely indicating that he was heartbroken, songs that she didn't even know about.

Misao was trying to smile, but couldn't manage. "Oh, now I see why she took you back," she said in a near whisper.

Enishi nodded and said, "I…have to go. I'll see you around," before leaving her standing there. She looked over to the pillar where the boys slowly walked in front of to join her.

She swallowed and looked at Kenshin. "I'm – "

Kenshin smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. He pulled out the letter for Yumi and said, "Could you give this to Aoshi to give to Yumi?"

Misao nodded. "I will."

"I think I'm going to go home now. I'll just go to the nurse, say that I'm sick," Kenshin said before walking past all of them.

He couldn't hear them calling his name. He was barely trying to hold himself together at this point. He knew that if he didn't get out of this school soon, he was going to lose it.

Kaoru was at the end of the hallway.

She was looking down at her feet. She didn't notice him. He was about to turn down the hallway to his right, take the long way to the nurse, when Enishi crossed over from her end of the hallway.

"Hey," he said, smiling at her fondly.

She smiled back. "Hey, I have Pre-Calc next period…do you want to walk me there?"

"But that's too far from my next class…" he complained, but Kenshin knew that he was going to do it anyway. That's what he would've done.

"Please?" she pouted, wrapping her arms around his waist and staring at Enishi with puppy eyes.

Kenshin couldn't breathe. He couldn't watch this scene.

He sighed. "_Fine_, Kao, fine. I guess I'll walk you, but I'm blaming you if I don't make it to my next class – if I collapse before I make it."

She snorted. "Oh, please. You run over two miles a day at lacrosse practice."

"Yeah, but in school it's different. I can't walk up three flights of stairs! Even in my best shape!"

She laughed. "True. So you're going to walk me?"

"Yes, I will," he said.

They stayed that way, and Kenshin realized it was because of tension. Enishi leaned in a little, almost asking Kaoru for permission. She tilted her head, allowing him to kiss her gently.

A choking sound made them pull apart, and Kenshin realized with a horror that it he made it. He slapped his hand onto his mouth despite knowing it was too late. It was then he realized that his face was wet. How embarrassing.

He hoped that they couldn't make out the tears on his face.

He watched her stare at him for a few moments, and he was unable to read her face. He wondered if she knew that she broke him. But she turned her attention back to Enishi and said, "Come on," while grabbing his hand gently and pulling him away.

He wiped his face and made his way out the back of the school to where he parked his car that day. He sat on the hood, since it was such a nice day that he didn't like the idea of sitting in his car.

Pulling out his phone, he dialed his brother's cell phone.

"_Hey little bro what's up? Shouldn't you be in school?"_ he asked in a false scolding tone.

"Sozo…" Kenshin murmured, hearing his voice crack.

"_What's wrong?"_ Sozo asked concernedly.

"I…I let her go. I don't know anymore…"

There was a moment of silence. _"Kenshin…"_

"I just want her out of my mind. I can't think of anyone _but_ her. I couldn't do it, Sozo. I can't be _just friends_ with her. I don't want just _some_ of her. I want _all_ of her. And I thought I did have her, for a little while, at least."

Another silence. _"Kenshin, why did you call me?"_

"What do you mean?" Kenshin thought he heard someone yelling in the background.

"_I've never been there for you before. You don't need me to help you out with this. Just go back to your comforts…"_

"It's not giving me _anything_ anymore! I've been playing my guitar for hours everyday and I can't even _move_ them anymore. I just want to sleep…" Kenshin said with a high voice, one of his shaky hands gripping his hair.

"_Forget about your freaking guitar! You can't save yourself like that this time! Listen to what others have told you."_

"But nobody has told me _anything_! I've been getting by alone…"

Sozo sighed exasperatingly. _"No! Don't play – _listen_!_ _You have to listen, Kenshin._" Kenshin loosened his grip and removed his hand from his hair. He tried his best to swallow. _"Now, who are you going to listen to?"_

Kenshin touched his iPod that was in his front pocket. He ran down his playlist in his mind, knowing it by heart. It brought a sense of comfort – know that when he couldn't play, or when he was questioning himself, the music that some of the greatest people ever created will always be there – they weren't going away.

"The Beatles," Kenshin whispered, a lone tear falling down his face. "Thanks."

The bell rang from inside the school and he quickly wiped his face as people started walking outside, crossing the courtyard to get to their next class.

"_I think we all need to be reminded of the things we just can't fake."_

"Right…"

"_You can't fake your past – you can't forget the music that coincides with your heart beat – the music that sings within you. I guarantee with one listen, you'll get back to your normal self. Nobody can change you – not even the girl that manages to break you, because when she leaves, your truth, this music, will always be there to heal you."_

"Jesus, Sozo, who'd of thought you could be so inspiring?"

He could practically envision his older brother shrugging in a flippant way. _"I'm full of surprises. Listen, I have to go – I'm kind of in the middle of class right now. Not to mention I've made a few girls cry – including my professor. Peace!"_ With that he hung up.

Kenshin managed a strangled laugh before getting his iPod. Closing his eyes as he felt the cold metal under his calloused fingertips. With trembling hands that lessened their severity after speaking to Sozo, he placed the white earphones into each ear. He scrolled down the long list of Beatles songs and paused over "I Want To Hold Your Hand."

He pressed play. After a few moments he let out a sigh and put his free hand over the top of his guitar case that was leaning against his car. He watched the second bell ring, and the last stragglers run back inside. When he was alone, he closed his eyes, absorbed the warmth of the sun, and hummed along with the song.

A crazy, uncalled for, brilliant idea came to his mind.

"Oh my God!" he exclaimed, nearly falling off his car.

It was as if the mixed up puzzle pieces of his thoughts suddenly snapped into place. He knew exactly what to do. For the first time in a week, he beamed. He stuffed his guitar back into his car and ran into the school. He didn't care that he was going to be ten minutes late to Pre-Calc, what mattered was that he had a plan.

But first he was going to have to make a few calls. And get the band together for some serious planning.

It was _on_.

* * *

A/N: So, different formatting, yes, but I hope you enjoyed it all the same :) So we have one more chapter, and then there's an epilogue! Get excited! Thanks to everyone who gave their inputs - you helped me make up my mind. But no worries, there will definitely be post-Don't Fake It oneshots in Shards for sure!

Please review!

MissGoalie


	16. Saturday

A/N: We're almost at the end! A mixture of grief and relief - so many new story ideas floating in my mind, but I've grown attached to this story like all my others.

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Saturday

"You know we're doing this because we love you, right?" Sano said at ten o'clock in the morning as he shut the trunk door of the Volkswagen van.

"Thank you so much, you guys. Seriously, you're awesome," Kenshin said for the millionth time.

"Yeah, I'm _never_ working with you until two in the morning. That was ridiculous," Yahiko added before yawning.

"I _said_ I'd buy you all dinner for a week! I'm really sorry that this was all last minute, but it just –"

"Relax, Kenshin, we're joking," Soujiro said reassuringly.

"Yeah, dude, besides, this high-strung, excited Kenshin is a hell of a lot better than miserable, emo Kenshin," Sano said, looping his long around Kenshin's shoulders.

"Hey, for the past year, who has gotten the most offers?" Kenshin raised his hand. "Me. Girls dig the emo, sensitive guitarist, remember?"

"Yeah, but I think Sou is giving you a run for your money," Sano said, elbowing Soujiro with his free arm. "You heard what that woman said last night about wanting us to perform."

"'Soujiro Seta is still in your band, right? He's just so cute – the quiet, soulful harmonist,'" Yahiko mocked.

Soujiro turned red. "I hate you guys so much."

"It's actually really funny how all these female managers love Soujiro – they want to molest him every time they meet him," Yahiko stated.

"It's true, Sou, sorry. I mean, girls love me, but more like a, 'Oh, you poor thing,' kind of deal."

"That's bullshit. It's more like, 'I want him in my pants,'" Sano said.

Kenshin sighed. "Okay, _maybe_ at first sight. But once they talk to me, then it becomes that. It's the other way around for Soujiro though."

"I'd rather not talk about this," Soujiro muttered. "Can we just focus on what we're going to do in about an hour?"

Kenshin's smile faded a bit. "Right. This is a big moment."

"I want to see the look on her face. But wait! We're not going to be seen!"

"Sano, stop, please? It needs to be a surprise, and since it'll take a good fifteen minutes to set up everything, it loses the…element of surprise."

"I really hope this makes her change her mind," Sano added quietly.

"I think it will," Soujiro said confidently. "I think you finally figured it out, Kenshin. The mystery that is Kaoru Kamiya."

"I hope so. But there is one thing I know for sure what's going to happen."

"What?" Sano, Yahiko, and Soujiro asked at the same time.

"I'll finally be able to sleep."

"You're telling us! We're crashing right after we do this!" Sano said, removing his arm and shoving Kenshin.

* * *

Kaoru was in school spirit mode: white shirt, jeans, and navy ribbons in her hair. She was rather excited for the game – it should be fun. Also, she thought she finally mastered the craziness that was lacrosse. Perhaps she would be able to fully appreciate Enishi's stick skills this time.

"This is going to be a good game – Westfield has been our rival for the past two years," Megumi said, getting up from Kaoru's bed.

"Well, you understand the sport more than I do. I just know there is some really hot guys on that team. Numbers six and twelve, right? Those guys," Kaoru sighed, getting dreamy eyes. "Too gorgeous."

"Yeah, they're a good duo, too. Enishi's gonna have to watch out for them."

They fell into a silence until Megumi said, "Are you okay?"

Kaoru thought her words out carefully. "It's getting better with each day, I guess. Enishi has been working hard. I've been working hard. We'll get through it."

Megumi nodded. "That's good." She paused. "Have you thought about what I asked you on Wednesday?"

Kaoru sighed exasperatingly. "I'd rather not talk about this right now." But Megumi continued to stare at Kaoru with a hard expression, making Kaoru give in. "Yeah, I have…but I don't know if I want to say it." Kaoru turned and faced her body toward Megumi. "There are reasons why I broke up with him. He knows a lot of them now: he was really involved with his band, and he kind of neglected me in his troubles of trying to get gigs, and my friends were just pulling me in another direction…it was hard. I was strained. Not to mention I was just sick of his inability to finding direction in his life. But…" Kaoru bit her lip.

"What?" Megumi put her hands on Kaoru's shoulders. "You can tell me. I'm not judging."

Kaoru suddenly looked like she was about to cry. "I'm afraid to say it out loud."

"Why? How bad could it be?"

Kaoru shook her head. "The thing is…it's not bad. Well, to other people it's not. It's just…_final_."

"I'm not following you."

A loud honk scared them apart. Kaoru walked over to her window and found Tomoe and two other girls in her cute black Mazda.

"You're finishing that later, okay?"

"Fine. Let's not mention it again until then," Kaoru gave in, grabbing a light sweater to tie around her waist. She also grabbed her keys, which made Megumi question why she was bringing them. "I'm leaving with Enishi after the game. He said he'd ditch his friends afterward."

"You're going to want to be with him when he's all sweaty? Ugh!" Megumi shuddered.

As they were walking out of Kaoru's room, she laughed. "You know all the rules to a good number of sports, yet the idea of sweat grosses you out."

"When I see a guy playing, the sweat can be an attractive feature…when they're a good dozen feet away."

When they got to the garage, Kaoru pushed the button making the door retract. Tomoe was staring at her through the windshield with a confused expression. "What the hell? I came here to pick you guys up!"

"I know, but Enishi texted me a few minutes ago saying that he wanted to hang out with me afterward."

Tomoe smiled at her. "Oh, well, that's great!"

Kaoru smiled back and got into the driver's seat and Megumi into the passenger's. She followed Tomoe to the school.

* * *

Enishi was smiling at Kaoru who was sitting in the stands. A lot of people were coming to this game, which was surprising given that lacrosse wasn't as popular as football, but it was an exciting situation. She smiled back at him. As the team was finishing their warm up, he motioned her to come over.

Kaoru shook her head quickly, grinning. "You have to go!" she mouthed to him.

He shook his head with a grin and mouthed, "Come on!"

Tomoe nudged Kaoru a bit. "Go!"

Kaoru rolled her eyes but smiled as she walked down the bleaches and quickly ran to the fence to meet him. He was perspiring on his brow, the weather slowly beginning to turn to summer.

"What?" she asked, lacing her fingers through the fence. He propped his stick and gloves against the fence and laced his own feverish hands through so his were partially covering hers. Her skin tingled.

"Aren't you going to give me a good luck kiss?" he asked, the adorable smile with the hint of sheepishness in it was one of her favorite smiles of his.

She laughed a little before silently meeting her lips with his. The crowd behind her starting clapping and whistling, which caused her to break way from him, blushing. "Good luck," she whispered. He quickly kissed her forehead before grabbing his stick and joining his team in the circle.

She turned on her toes and made her way up the bleachers to Tomoe and Megumi.

"Enishi is so cute with you, you know?" Tomoe said. "It's so obvious he's smitten with you."

Kaoru smiled and turned her attention to the boys, who had just yelled a cheer (she couldn't understand what they said – their deep voices making it difficult) and took their positions on the field. Enishi took his place in the middle. The refs waved their hands at the goalies, checking to see if they were ready.

Enishi and the other center knelt on the ground and waited for the ref to blow the whistle. When the whistle blew, Enishi body-shoved the other boy, earning him position of the ball.

Let the games begin.

* * *

"Lacrosse is a pretty cool sport, you know," Yahiko noted as he parked his car on the narrow road behind the commentator's box, completely hidden from view.

"Played by preppy pricks," Sano finished as he got out of the car.

"Nice alliteration," Soujiro noted.

"True, but the game _itself_ is good."

"Okay, guys, let's get serious."

They all froze in their tracks. "Did you just say…'let's get _serious_'?" Sano repeated incredulously.

"Oh, happy day!" Soujiro exclaimed.

"This girl _better_ be worth it," Yahiko muttered, moving to the back of his van to start unpacking.

"She is," Kenshin said conversationally, as if his heart wasn't on the line at the moment.

"You heard what that tool said yesterday – you only have two minutes. Three minutes at the most," Soujiro reminded Kenshin.

They got together and slowly pulled Yahiko's drum set onto the cardboard lying on the pavement. "I know. But I think we got the song to go fast enough."

"Yeah, it kind of butchers the original intent," Sano said.

"But that's what a cover is supposed to do," Kenshin countered. "I think it works."

"Well it's good that it's only two minutes then – people won't have to throw tomatoes at you for that long."

"Fuck you," Kenshin said as they stepped away from the drum set and started unpacking their guitars.

"I'm joking – it's going to be good. Even though it's not your words…it's still from your heart, you know?" Sano muttered, pulling his base out and tuning it.

"I love it when you say something meaningful," Soujiro said after a moment of silence. "It gives me hope that you guys aren't just a bunch of wankers."

"Well we like it when you swear – it gives us hope that you aren't a _complete_ goody-goody," Yahiko said, ruffling Soujiro's hair.

"Touché."

"No! Fuck you!" Sano corrected.

"Ugh, I'd rather not," Soujiro scoffed.

"It's okay – I'll say it for you," Kenshin said, putting a hand on his friend's shoulder before turning to Sano. "Fuck you!"

Soujiro and Sano laughed for a few moments until Yahiko said from the stairwell that led down to the field, "Guys – one more minute."

One minute.

"I'll go down and plug the speaker downstairs," Soujiro muttered, reaching into the van, grabbing the speaker and going down the stairs.

Kenshin reached into the van and checked Soujiro's guitar to see if it was in tune before checking his own. His hands were shaking.

* * *

The last five minutes of the game were intense. Every time one team scored, the other would quickly gain possession and score a goal. The score was tied at nine points each when the horn blew, signaling the end of the first half.

"Enishi is on a _roll_," Kaoru heard someone from one of the bottom rows comment. "Seriously, I don't know what the hell happened, but he's fucking _owning_."

Tomoe smirked from the corner of Kaoru's eye. "Perfect, isn't it?"

Kaoru nodded. "Yeah…it's all perfect." All according to plan, Kaoru added in her head.

"Who is that?"

"Are we supposed to be getting entertainment or something?"

Kaoru turned her attention to the field and all her planning, all her hours of convincing herself that she made the right decision a week ago all went up in smoke and flames as she watched Kenshin finish his running to the middle of the field with a mike stand in one hand and his guitar in the other, the black wire trailing behind him.

He placed the mike onto the ground, took a quick look at the number of people in the stands and immediately starting playing.

It took a few seconds for her to realize that he was singing "I Want To Hold Your Hand," but when she did, she brought her hands to her mouth in complete shock.

The guitar rifts were quick, but still contained the catchiness of the original version. She could hear Yahiko's drumming and Soujiro and Sano's guitars…they were playing behind the audience.

But her entire focus was on Kenshin. It was too much, too sudden, too…dreamlike.

"_I want to hold your hand/I want to hold your hand/I want to hold your hand_," he sang before finishing with a few chords.

Her heart was beating so fast that it was almost hard to breathe, especially after she heard Kenshin's parting words: "Kaoru, you're not going to avoid this conversation anymore – it's your choice – you come to me, or I'll keep coming to you. Either way, it's happening. I know that if we stay together, it's going to save us, so I'm not giving up, and I'm not letting you do that either. You know where to find me."

He grabbed the mike and strolled off the field. People around her clapped and even a few girls a few rows down and over were gushing over how romantic it was.

She glanced over at the field and saw Enishi staring at her. She couldn't bring herself to brush the moment off as nothing. It was far from it.

* * *

Apparently they had won, but Kaoru didn't pay attention to the second half at all. She didn't even know it was the end of the game until that obnoxious horn shook her out of her reveries. Her schoolmates were cheering around her, jumping up and chanting. She sat and stared blankly at the boys on the field as they ran toward each other and started jumping in a circle.

"Kaoru!" Tomoe yelled over everyone. "We won! Start acting like it!"

Kaoru shook her head and stood up with everyone else. "Right."

Tomoe narrowed her eyes. "Are you _still_ thinking about him?"

"Honestly, how can I not? He bore his heart on that field."

"He's doing it on purpose! He wants you to feel…_guilty_ for some bizarre reason."

"You're wrong," Kaoru found herself saying.

Tomoe froze for a moment. "What?"

Kaoru shook her head. "It wasn't to guilt trip me…I was already guilt tripping myself…he knew that. He was…" Kaoru's breath hitched in her throat. "Oh…"

"Kaoru! Focus here. Don't get carried away – remember – you're with Enishi. You decided it was best."

"Actually, no, _you_ decided it was best." Kaoru suddenly laughed. "And I let you manipulate me." She looked over at the boys again and half the kids in the stands were making their way down toward them.

Enishi glanced up at her.

"I can't do this anymore," Kaoru said. "To either of us. It's terrible."

"You can't be _serious_! What do you think you're going to do? Go back to _Kenshin Himura_? What about him being in the past?"

Kaoru smiled. "The past makes you who you are," she said resolutely. "But I don't want to talk to you about my future anymore." She nodded, as if agreeing with herself. "Yeah. In fact, I kind of don't want to talk to you for a little while. I need to figure out some things, if you don't mind."

Tomoe settled her facial expression into that of indifference. "Fine. Do what you want. All I've been trying to do is help you."

Kaoru grasped Tomoe's hands. "I know. You've been the best mentor anyone could've asked for. But…letting you handle my love life was the biggest mistake I ever made."

Tomoe let go of Kaoru's hands and asked, "So what are you doing now?"

Kaoru merely smiled at Tomoe politely before saying, "I'm going to go. I'll see you in school on Monday."

With that she walked down the bleachers without a look back.

"Kaoru!"

Kaoru turned to Megumi's voice and found her weaving her way through stragglers. When Kaoru reached the pavement, she waited for her friend.

"What the hell was _that_ back there?"

"Taking control of my own life."

Megumi smiled. "Good for you."

Kaoru let out a breath. "I feel a little liberated. But…" She stopped at the fence to wait for Enishi. "There's something I have to do…that won't give me any satisfaction."

Megumi pulled Kaoru into a hug. "Good luck," she whispered before pulling away, leaving Kaoru to herself.

She only had to wait a couple of minutes for Enishi to come to her. He was somber.

"Are you okay?" Enishi asked, full of concern.

Kaoru's throat tightened. She almost wished he would act like a complete animal to make this easier. Wrapping her arm around one of his, she led them up the stairs to the upper level where all the parking was, including her car.

Enishi kept his space and his mouth shut the whole time. She was grateful for that. It wasn't until she got to his house and parked in his driveway when she started choking back sobs.

"What's wrong? Kaoru? Please, talk to me," Enishi said with anguish.

"Enishi…" she said, trying to control herself. "I'm so sorry."

"_You're_ sorry? Kaoru, you'll _never_ have to apologize to me for _anything_. What's wrong?"

"I…I can't lie anymore," she whispered. "I can't fake this." She wiped a few stray tears from her cheeks.

There was a loud silence that seemed to stretch for eternity until he said, "Then don't."

"Huh?"

"Don't fake it. I don't want a girlfriend who's forcing herself to be with me." He looked down at his feet before chuckling humorlessly. "I was going against nature, I guess," he said softly. His sharp eyes found her tearful ones. "You two have been through too much to suddenly break off. There's a bond there that I…can't compete with."

"I never intended –"

"Of course you didn't. I believed in you…that you could truly leave him behind as nothing more than a fond childhood memory. But he's too imbedded in your thoughts. You could never leave him alone, you know?"

She sniffled. "I'm not getting back together with him, just so you know. It's going to be a long while before that happens."

"I wouldn't blame you if you did – I suppose it would be like getting a taste of my own medicine, wouldn't it? See what he felt like."

"But I don't _want_ that. I shouldn't have done it to him, and I'm _not_ going to hurt someone like that again."

He reached over with his hand and cupped her tear-stained cheek. "It's okay, Kaoru, we're even now."

She shook her head. "No, we're not."

He sighed. "Well…maybe not completely. I end up with the shorter end of the stick in this…but that's to be expected. After all, I'm a cheater."

"…Although this is going to sound…really wrong…but…thank you. If you hadn't done it…I would've stayed blind to a lot of things in my life."

He smiled, a resigned expression on his face. "I suppose that's making it positive."

She leaned in and kissed him on the lips one last time. It was a bittersweet one. It was chaste, but it still managed to hold a little bit of passion that she used to feel for him completely. When they pulled away, she said, "You're not a cheater. One day you'll meet someone…and you just won't do that."

"I'll look forward to that day, then. I'll take your word for it."

He got out of the car and gathered his belongings. He stood outside her car and stared at her for a few moments. He smiled at her, or at least he tried his best to. She gave him a watery smiled in return before backing out of his driveway.

When she got onto the road, her sadness was replaced with a burning anger that tunneled her vision. She was pissed, she was hurt, and she was seething. With severe road rage, she drove to Kenshin's house, ready to rip him apart.

* * *

She almost ran into his garage, stopping a mere few inches away from the house. She stomped to the front door and rang the doorbell three times, knocked ten times and yelled, "Kenshin! Kenshin! Open this _damn_ door _now_!"

Nothing.

Frustrated, she went under the plant pot to her left, finding the spare key. When she got inside, she yelled, "_Kenshin_!"

Her march up the carpeted stairs was loud as she made her way to his room. The door was shut. Without thought, she opened it, and was surprised to no one in there…

Just a lump in the bed.

"You're _sleeping_?! Get up!" Kaoru screeched, going over to the side of his bed and punching Kenshin's body.

Kenshin jerk and twitched and he looked at her with crazed eyes before realizing who it was. "Kaoru?" His voice was throaty, which made her shiver a little.

"What the _fuck_ is wrong with you?"

He coughed to clear his throat before saying, "Whoa, Kaoru, calm down, what's wrong."

"Why can't you give up on me?!" she screamed.

Her words and tone pierced him. Her eyes were bright, but they didn't look right. She looked to be on the verge of tears.

"I'm not giving up…I'm going to keep at you until you realize I'm everything you need," he answered, staring at her directly into her crazy eyes.

She breathed deeply. "Don't say that. Can't you just be over me?"

"I could be, but you're not over me, so why should I be over you?"

She gritted her teeth. "You're so _conceited_! I've been with Enishi for almost a year. I was in love with _him_, not you. How could you _think_ that I was in love with you?"

He shrugged. "I saw the way you looked at me. That night in Strathmore Hall; this whole past week. It was me you wanted." He grinned a slow easy grin. "It's me you still want."

"Actually, no," she stated, clenching her jaw tighter. "I'm done with boys for a while. I'll just graduate, leave, and then maybe reconsider in college in two years." She shook her head. "I can't talk to you right now. I can't think."

She walked away from him with quick strides to his door, but quicker than she thought possible, he was standing right in front of her, very close to her. "I'm not letting you walk away. The only thing I'm over is letting you walk away."

"Kenshin?"

He shook his head. "This is it, Kaoru. What I'm feeling…it's _it_. It came to me last week and I can't even get the words out in the open right now."

She put a hand on his mouth to prevent him from talking. Without even questioning him in her head or out loud, she knew what he was trying to say, and it scared her. "I need some time," Kaoru stated strongly.

He groaned from the back of his throat. "You've had over a _year_. I don't understand all this waiting on my part!"

She bit her lip, looking guilty. "I need to learn how to be myself without a boyfriend. I've been with someone for so long that I've forgotten."

He let out an amused sigh. "Kaoru…you _are_ yourself when you're with me, can't you see that?" She started to look a bit desperate, which made him say, "You know, when you broke up with me, some people asked me about us." He swallowed. "They wondered if I broke up with you…because I was the one who acted relatively normal. They wondered if I ended things because my band was finally getting noticed…and I wanted to keep my options open. That's what everyone thought, you know. At least for the first month or so. That I was the one who ran away from commitment." He smiled at her without humor. "Imagine their shock when they learned that you broke up with me. That I was the one left waiting."

Tears filled her eyes. "Kenshin…"

"_Why_. Please, just tell me the _basis _for your breaking up with me. We're never going to move forward if you don't tell me right now."

She let out a shaky breath before taking his left hand in hers. His fingers were slim and smooth, save for the calluses on the tips of his fingers. "It was about a week after we almost had sex…" she murmured. "We were lying in your bed and you were caressing my fingers on my left hand…" she started doing so his own hand. "And you were paying special attention to my ring finger. I looked over at you and you were clearly spacing out, not realizing what you were doing. You were…exploring it from base to tip…" she began sensuously massaging it. "And then I just had this thought that one day it won't be bare. That there would be a ring on it…and you were the one who was going to put it there."

Kenshin stopped breathing. "_You_ were the one who was afraid."

"And you weren't?" she whispered.

"No," he found himself saying. "I wasn't. The pace was right…"

"Not for me – we almost had _sex_. We were _barely_ sixteen. It scared me to death how fast we were going. And…the idea that you were it…the one that I was…" she shook her head. "It was too much. I…I felt…not _trapped_…but it all just felt so final. No room to…ugh. Do you understand where I'm coming from?"

He closed his eyes. "Yes…_but_…you should've _talked_ to me."

"Well there were the other reasons I've given you. I just thought it would be easier to do a clean break."

"Well that epically failed, didn't it?"

She found herself chuckling. "Yeah, it did."

His hand was now caressing hers. He brought it to his mouth and kissed it. She stared at him for a moment. "Can you…wait? To say everything on your mind? Please? I know it's really selfish of me…but I want to hear them and truly be happy, you know? Because that's what you deserve – the reaction you deserve, I mean. Right now I'm just screwed up emotionally."

He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. _I love you, Kaoru, and I'm only keeping it in for you_, he thought to himself before letting his breath back out. "Okay."

She tightened her grip on his hand and leaned in to kiss him chastely. "Thank you."

He pulled her flush against him and kissed her deeply. She tried to pull away for a moment, but then she brought her hands up the nape of his neck and rested them in his hair, kissing him back.

It only lasted for a few moments.

She pushed him away and said, "That's it. That's going to have to last you."

He smirked at her. "And it's going to have to last _you_."

She laughed a little and put her face in her hands. "Oh, Kenshin…" She lifted her face from her hands. "I've missed you."

He smiled sincerely, which had always managed to weaken her knees. "So…I guess we're on the same team for real?"

She nodded, smiling. "Yeah, we are…and this time I'm _only_ on yours."

He supposed that was the closest he was going to get to her admitting she was only his for the time being, but it was okay for now. Everything was okay. Finally, he was okay.

* * *

A/N: The next chapter is the epilogue…so sad!

Please review!

MissGoalie


	17. Epilogue

A/N: The finale! Enjoy :)

Standard disclaimers apply.

* * *

Epilogue

"_Let's go_!"

Heads were thrashing in the Volkswagen van as guitar riffs filled their ears.

"_The needle on my record player has been wearing thin_," Kenshin, Kaoru, Misao, and Yahiko screamed.

"_This record has been playing since the day you've been with him_!" Soujiro and Megumi sang loudly after them.

"_No more long rides home/no more of your station_!" Sano howled, making everyone else in the van laugh.

Yahiko swung into a parking spot at the best location by Westfield beach. "Yes! We only have to walk twenty feet!"

"What the fuck Yahiko, that's so far away. Can't you do better than that?"

"Fuck you Sano. I get excited about a parking spot and you totally freak out on me."

"I don't blame you, it's the little things in life that make you happy," Kaoru said from the middle row, patting Yahiko's shoulder.

"Damn straight!" Kenshin exclaimed, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and bringing her close to him.

"Jesus. Kenshin's been on a high for about three days now," Misao told Megumi and silent Aoshi, rolling her eyes as they got out of the car.

"Why?" Megumi asked.

"Because he found a group of girls at First Absolute's last gig singing along to his songs."

"Hell yeah! It was fucking _incredible_," Kenshin noted as he slid out of the van.

"_Remember the time we realized 'Thriller' was our favorite song_!" Soujiro and Megumi sang, the song still playing in the background.

Soujiro laughed. "_Finally_, someone who understands my love for post-millennium punk songs!"

"Yeah, who'd of thought?" Kaoru said amusedly. She was learning more about Megumi with every passing day ever since she became friends with the boys of First Absolute.

Megumi grinned and looped her arm through Soujiro's. "We're just musical soul mates."

Kenshin side-glanced at Sano, who was focusing on unpacking. Although Soujiro had no romantic feelings for Megumi, and Megumi had none for Soujiro, it still bothered Sano that Soujiro was closer to Megumi than he was.

"Save for him not liking Rise Against. That's unforgivable," Megumi added as an afterthought. "But that's okay. Sano and I can listen to them."

Sano smiled softly, which nearly made Kenshin gape. But instead he smiled too, because he knew that Sano was going to be okay. One day it would work out.

Kenshin turned his attention to Kaoru, who was standing with Yahiko on a spot of sand, saving it. The wind was blowing strands of hair in her face, and his breath was momentarily taken.

He was glad that Yahiko was warming up to Kaoru. After she and Kenshin became friends again, the boys were skeptical of her. Soujiro was the first to accept her at the end of the school year. Sano said he wouldn't forgive Kaoru until she did something for Kenshin to prove that she was there to stay. Kenshin had no idea what Sano meant by that comment.

Sano went over to Kaoru and Yahiko to place a large towel on the ground. Aoshi and Misao went over to them, Misao blabbing about there not being enough room for everyone to sit on it. Megumi brought over the bags of food, complaining about the weight. Kenshin watched old and new friends come together and he felt whole, a sensation he hadn't felt in a long time.

"_Dude_! Stop gawking and get your ass here! We need some tunes, yo!" Sano called out, breaking Kenshin out of his reverie. He took his bag out of the van, shut the door, and came over to the towel.

Plopping himself down next to Kaoru, his phone began buzzing. It was Sozo.

"Hey, what's going on?" Kenshin asked.

"_Nothin', nothin' just calling my favorite brother in the entire world."_

"What the hell do you want?"

"_What kind of hoodlum do you think I am? Why can't I just ring up my younger brother just to say hello?"_

"Because then you'd be clinically insane."

"_Fine. I actually need you to pick me up tomorrow from Chou's house."_

"What the fuck why?"

"_Because some douchebag _rammed_ into my car –"_

"You've got to be joking – dad's gonna flip a shit. Your insurance must be insane!"

"_Hah, you got me. No actually Sumi needs to borrow my car because she got into an accident with hers. Please? Pwetty pease?"_

Kenshin had a look of disgust on his face. "_Fine_, I'll pick you up."

"_I'm glad you see it my way."_

"What time?"

"_Whenever you feel like it. Just call me before."_

"Okay. You owe me."

"_Whatever. Peace!"_

When Kenshin hung up, he said, "I hate that son of a bitch." He paused for a moment. "Who wants to come with me?"

Everyone was silent. Kaoru sighed and raised her hand. "Fine. But you owe _me_."

"False – you already owed me. This is making it even."

"For _what_?"

"For doing your last three homework assignments in math while you were doing post-election stuff."

"Oh, come on."

"Oh, wait, and I _did_ help you on studying for Government. So, technically, you still owe me, Miss President."

Kaoru groaned, but a secret thrill ran through her stomach. It never got old being reminded that she was president of the student government. "Okay, _okay_. I'll think of something quick to get me out of your debt."

She looked away from Kenshin to the ocean, where children were playing on the shoreline. Her eyes drifted to Sano, who gave her a pointed look. She knew what he wanted her to do.

"Let's go in! Since it's August, the water's going to be warm!" Soujiro said.

"Yeah!"

All the boys, save for Aoshi, took their shirts off and ran toward the ocean. Aoshi pulled out a book from his backpack and began reading. Misao snuggled up to Aoshi, despite the hot temperatures and Megumi was stripping down to her dark red bikini.

"You coming?" Megumi asked Kaoru.

Kaoru nodded toward the beach. "Wait. I just want to see their reactions."

All the boys dived in, but Sano was the first scream. "_Fuck_! It's so _cold_!"

Kenshin's redhead bobbed out of the water, his arms crossed over his chest. "_Let's go in, the water's going to be warm_," he mocked Soujiro.

Kaoru laughed before standing up and removing her shirt and shorts. "Okay, now let's go."

"That's a cute suit, where did you get it?"

"I found it at the mall – got a good price for it."

"Really? Hmph, this suit cost me quite a lot."

"But it's looks _so_ good on you."

Megumi giggled. "I know."

Kaoru laughed, but soon shuddered when the water washed over her feet. "It is pretty cold."

"I'd say so!" Kenshin said, wadding his way to the shoreline. He stood next to Kaoru and nodded at her and Megumi. "You guys going in?"

"Maybe."

"I will!" Megumi said, bringing her hair up in a bun before walking into the water and gracefully diving under a wave.

Kenshin laughed as Megumi let out a string of curses when she surfaced. "I'm glad we became friends. Seriously."

Kaoru smiled. "Yeah. She fits right in. It's kind of…strange."

"Like fate?"

She scoffed. "I don't like the idea of fate, you know that."

"Whatever. So…what do you think?"

"Of what?"

"Megumi and Sano? Is it possible?"

She sighed and looked at the two of them. They were currently arguing about something and Soujiro was trying to be the peacemaker. "I don't know."

"He likes her."

"I know he does…but I doubt they're ready for each other. You know what I mean? I think maybe in a few months…or even years."

He sighed. "I suppose so. I just want him to be happy. I don't want him to wait forever for a lost cause."

"I'm not saying it's a lost cause."

"Well you're insinuating it."

"It's just…I hate the idea of seeing some other guy break over a clueless girl."

Kenshin let out a deep sigh. "I know what you mean. But he's less pathetic than I was."

"That's not fair – don't judge yourself. It's different with him – he's just beginning to know her. You had already known me for _years_. Big difference. Also, Megumi's not a complete bitch."

"Hey, if I can't rant about what a lame person I am, then you can't either."

She smiled. "Deal."

They stood in a comfortable silence, watching their friends play Marco Polo, except Sano was clearly cheating, making the game rather pointless, as noted out by Soujiro.

"How was your lunch with Tomoe yesterday?" Kenshin asked suddenly.

"It was really good. I think we're on a good track."

"What did you talk about?"

She sighed. "What we've been up to. She apologized, too. Said I was like a little sister she never had. She didn't realize that I could make my own decisions too…I suppose it was just all spawned from her wanting someone to look up to her."

Kenshin smiled a little. "I suppose that would feel kind of awesome. The idea of someone finding you to be…such a great person. An older sibling should be that…too bad mine was a bit of a fuck-up."

"At least you have a relationship now. And had one before she died. I never really experienced having an older sibling figure until high school…and I really liked it."

"Of course you did," he noted pointedly.

They fell into another silence until she noted sadly, "They still don't like me."

"That's not true."

"Yes, it is. I mean, Soujiro is the only one nice to me. Yahiko is kind of warming up to me. And Sano flat out hates me."

"Sano doesn't hate you. He's just…" He narrowed his eyes, trying to pick the right words out. "He's afraid that you're going to do what you did over a year ago."

She stared at him. "You're so confident that I won't hurt you again."

He merely smiled and said, "Yeah, because I know you never will. I can see it. You'll never find it within yourself to cut me off again."

She nudged him. "You make it sound like I'm dependent on you."

"There's nothing wrong with that. I'll openly admit that my full happiness partially relies on you. Besides, you're too good of a person."

"No," she whispered. "I'm not."

"Hey, you admitted that it was a mistake. It just proves that it isn't who you want to be."

His understanding hurt her, and healed her at the same time. Just because they came together too early, and weren't ready for the things relationships entail, didn't mean they weren't meant to be. And she somehow knew that they were.

* * *

She unabashedly stared at him as he strummed his guitar and sang familiar melodies. Soujiro accompanied him by the fire they built. Flames flickered in his violet eyes, turning them amber. Even when they finished, she continued to look at him.

She grabbed her drawstring bag as she stood up. Stepping off the blanket and onto the cold sand, she made her way over to him and tapped his shoulder. She silently beckoned him to follow her.

He gave his guitar to Soujiro and quickly caught up with her, their strides coinciding in perfect harmony.

"I made you a mix," she said when they reached the end of the beach. Large, jagged rocks were before them and continued through the water. He climbed to the top and held out a hand for her to help her up.

"You did?"

"Yeah, but it's really short. And it's not that amazing. Some of the songs I took from the one you made me in April."

She reached into her bag and pulled out a CD. He opened the case and tried to read the contents. Frustrated, he took out his cell phone to light the page, making her laugh.

_Songs That Remind Me of You_

The Mixed Tape – Jack's Mannequin

Don't Stop Believin' – Journey

The Middle – Jimmy Eat World

I Want to Hold Your Hand – The Beatles

Everything You Want – Vertical Horizon

Memory – Sugarcult

Everything Is Alright – Motion City Soundtrack

Chasing Cars – Snow Patrol

Time After Time – Quietdrive

If You Want To Sing Out, Sing Out – Cat Stevens

A soft smile was on his face as he read down the list of songs. She smiled at him before she continued walking down the rocks. He quietly followed her and listened to her softly sing, "_You can do what you want/The opportunity's on/And if you find a new way/You can do it today_…"

"Kaoru?" He could do it tonight.

They stopped at the highest point on the rocks. She stared at him with sparkling eyes, the moonlight reflecting in them. This was it.

"I know you asked me to wait for you…but…" He looked down at his feet, getting lost for words. Taking a deep breath, he looked directly into her eyes and said, "I love you. I have for a while now."

Her eyes grew wider. She wasn't suspecting this at all. She thought that maybe they would get back together, but not have this conversation.

"I know that this is really fast…even my mind is going in circles over this…but…it's true. I wouldn't joke about something like this."

"…I know you wouldn't."

He let out a breath. "You don't have to force yourself to say anything. No awkward 'thank you' or anything like that. I just…wanted you to know that I want to be the one who holds you. Now and tomorrow and every day after that."

She swallowed, staring into his too-serious eyes. She closed her own, thinking about the past three months when they became friends again, then what he had done for her during spring break, then the year where she went out with Enishi. Everything was for her, and that made her feel so guilty. But it also gave her a fluttering in the pit of her stomach. He did love her.

"Yes," she found herself whispering. She opened her eyes to find him staring at her. "I…" Her voice disappeared, but she mouthed, "I love you."

His smile was so large, so bright, and so…_happy_…that she couldn't look at him. That pure joy wanted to make her cry for keeping him from experiencing it. So she brought his face down to hers and kissed him.

As he held her as close as possible, she had to agree that it was fate. It was the only explanation for how perfect everything felt. Although she hated it, she supposed she could deal with this.

* * *

A/N: I've enjoyed writing this story a lot, and I hope you've enjoyed reading it – it's been a hell of a ride!

Please review and make sure to keep an eye out for my next story! ;)

MissGoalie


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